as much as i hate venting, i just cant stop thinkng about one thing
is it valid to miss one person from 2023 if we never was close and we werent talking to each other a lot
last time when i saw them in 2025 it caused me panic attack and i was very afraid
i was 12 and they were like 5 years older than me and even if we werent close, they shaped me into who i am today. i was looking up on them a little too much, even if they were talking and doing very weird stuff...i think i saw them as a sort of parental figure
i feel very pathetic for searching parental figure in others
im sorry for venting its just a topic that i cant talk about to someone who i know










