How do these guys even get into these situations...??

Ed, on a random band name generator: Oooo! They Might Be Depressed Horses! That about sums up my friend group

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Riley: Why should I make my bed, when I'm just gonna unmake it to sleep in it anyways?

Justin: Why should I feed you if your just gonna die anyways?

Riley:

Riley: I'll go make my bed-

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Kit: I’m scared that when you become rich and famous you’ll be embarrassed by me.

Ed: Oh dad, I’m already embarrassed by you.

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Kit: The doctor said all my bleeding was internal. That's where the blood is supposed to be!

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Brie: My husband is wearing a fucking suit to his ADHD diagnosis appointment.

Kit: It's a special event!

Brie: Shut up.

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Kit, stuck in a room with toxic gas: What??

Justin, in the other room banging on the glass: YOU'RE BREATHING IN POISON!!!

Kit: It's okay, I just got back from Playtime! I'm immune!!

Ed & Justin: WHAT?!?!?!

Kit: :D

Justin: DUDE!

Ed: YOU'RE GONNA DIEEEEE!!!!

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Riley: By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you.... Blocked and deleted.

Riley: You may now KISS. MY ASS.

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Ed: You know, it's so lovely to be wanted.

Riley: NOT BY THE FBI?????

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Kit: Hey, I ate the brownies downstairs. They were really good.

Kit; Are they yours?

Justin: Yeah, it's gonna kick in soon.

Kit;

Kit: What's gonna kick in?

Justin:

Kit: Justin.

×~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~×

Ed: Hey besties-

Riley: Die.

Ed: What did I do to you-

×~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~×

Ed: I told Uncle Justin to grab snacks for everyone.

Riley, looking through the options: Why did you grab fruit snacks? Are you five? Who even likes Fruit Snacks?

*Ed, Justin, and Kit raise their hands*

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Justin: Look, do I consider myself attractive? Yes. But would I have sex with my clone? Also yes.

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Kit: I don’t go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me first.

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Kit: If you water water, it grows.

Brie: ...What.

Justin: He's got a point.

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Kit: I want to be like a caterpillar.

Brie: Explain.

Kit: Eat a lot, sleep for a while, wake up beautiful.

Justin: You know they have a lifespan of a week, right?

Kit:

Kit: That's just another highlight!

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Justin: Think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm?

Riley: If you can ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.

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Justin: *holds a gun out to Ed*

Ed: I-I don't believe in guns.

Justin: Well, trust me, they're very real. Now take it.

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Kit, trying to comfort Ed: What's the problem? Anxiety? Low self-esteem? Obsessive thoughts of random arson? I've been there.

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Brie: Is there a reason why you can't take anything seriously?!

Kit; Joking is a common defense mechanism for someone with a traumatic childhood.

Brie: Would you like a traumatic adulthood?

Kit: *inhales*

Kit: I would not.

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Kit: Wow, a surprisingly peaceful and domestic moment. When will it be ruined?

Ed: DADDDD!!!!!

Kit: There it is!

×~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~×

Kit: Strawberry milk doesn’t taste like strawberry OR milk.

Justin: Go the fuck to sleep Kit.

×~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~×

Kit: How do ethical philosophers feel about murder?

Brie: Well, it’s frowned upon.

Kit: Okay, but what if the reason you want to murder someone is to make your life easier?

Kit: That’s okay, right?

×~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~×

Justin: Get in the Halloween spirit and make a ghost!