A fistful of rubber snakes

It's so mean that people say a catfish's barbells are facial hair. She doesn't even have any facial hair, they aren't whiskers: she has sensitive barbells. They are closer to tongues than to any other body part. Certainly not beard hair! You're just jealous that she can navigate dark and murky waters and you can't. It's not even a mustache at all. Be nice to her.

Polycules should be able to trade people like sports teams do

Listen -- you're a good defender and your pussy is fantastic, but that's not what our team needs right now. We're trading you to Greater Boston in exchange for someone who has a car.

Sending a utility top to Chicago in exchange for two prospects (the next two girls to transition there have to move here instead)

Crosswalks exist to test your will in the face of adversity which is why i always walk directly in front of oncoming cars

One time I went on a date with a girl whose sincerely held belief was that crosswalks endanger pedestrians by letting them think they can cross the street safely and thus relaxing from the rabbit-like state that all people must adopt to earn their way to the other curb. We had this conversation while we ate dinner, myself one handed, because my other arm was in a sling from the recent injury I’d sustained from a car hitting me in a crosswalk.

i could never watch marvel rivals esports because like... i don't know how to explain it, but it all feels completely weightless. it's like watching someone smash paper dolls against each other

It’s almost like a parody of the modern state of the Superhero Genre right, like most of the selling point of Rivals’ game design is the abilities looking cool and seeming powerful in a vacuum, but in an actual match when all of these are going off at once it beautifully cancels out into a wet paper bag fight where periodically everyone glows slightly brighter as they press their ultimates and then nothing has really changed. The only way fights end is because someone fucked up, which is an ironic display of skill expression for how much it renders the majority of the neutral game (and thus all the “sick looking” superhero powers) meaningless and interchangeable.

going to queer meetups in the lands between and some raya lucaria student calls me butch because I wear full armor

I have a helmet because I don't want my skull to get caved in, emerald

It's crazy how many women in Deadlock look like absolute coked up perverts (/pos) and then you throw Paige in there and she's this absolutely stacked nerd who's out here talking about King Arthur and not realizing her ass is in a different zip code and all these women like Silver and Holliday and Mina are looking at her like a dog that managed too get into the kitchen without supervision during Thanksgiving dinner

do i want to come to "the circus"? (apprehensive) describe it with two adjectives first

I really like that whenever people draw gajinkas of birds they pick the more vibrant and colourful of the two morphs. That birdgirl is often not only very transgender but clocky as hell. peace and love.

*trying to do a horny fantasy post but desperate to not be derivative* the girl taking off her shoes is actually a member of the Kar'anath, an original fantasy species from my own homebrew. They're actually pretty different from elves. They're psionic for one thing. Also it's not even lore-compliant for her to have been wearing shoes