they are not like me, they are the cool kids. the smart kids, the musically gifted kids, the ''watch me, i'll be a star'' kids. they are not like me because they actually seem academically perfect. days and nights flood into books and looks, hair and makeup. stuck at the desk they jealously look at me from across the room. the sound of my adventures rips a whole into what used to be silence. they are not like me, they keep their noses in their work and their ears shut tightly, almost so tightly wound around the fingers of their parents. be a lawyer, larry, or dont show up at all. they are not like me, they have yet to find out what fun is. what it means to forget your name, because they feel like their name is what is most important. remember me, watch me, feel me, i'll be great. look at me falling down next to the pedestal you put yourself on. its a big rise from there. they are the cool kids, the smart kids, the musically gifted kids, the ''watch me, i'll be the best one around''. but what is around, if your world is as big as your apartment. the room that doesnt fit your ego is all you've seen. they are not like me, for they don't know what culture is. they havent lived. they are not like me, because i am cracked, wrong, im small, anxious and ill. i have sinned and i'll never be the same. but yet i get to say i will never be the same as them. they are not like me, because they want what is in the movies. they know that giving up their lives and exchanging it for work will pay off, and they'll have a wife and a baby boy named alex, and a garden with some rose bushes, and a desk all to themselves, in a nice glass office on the second floor. but watch me, feel me, see me as i get to live the life you have dreamed of when you were ever so little. watch me dance with the wolves under the moon in a field full of stars. watch me as i smoke my cigarette, lungs as black as ash, kissing my love in the rain. watch me play the lead in the movie you so desperately wanted to see. they are not like me because i get to have a life, a love, a death. they seem to be dying every day, pouring rain, returning home fighting over remotes. they are the cool kids, but what is so cool about making it.
