Welcome to Sun Valley Summer Camp!

GREGORY: My rivalry with Stan...

GREGORY: ...

GREGORY: I... ehem, I must say that my memory falls a little flat on exactly what troubles we’ve run into in the last several months.

GREGORY: The reason being is that we’ve rather actively avoided each other since around December of last year or so.

GREGORY: Though I can say he looks just as thrilled as he always has in the past-- during the height of our most vying feuds.

GREGORY: That vexed, vaguely annoyed face is one that sparks many a memory of our childhood rivalry.

GREGORY: I can recall as early as age 11, we would strife about all through 5th grade.

GREGORY: Oh Stanley, is that what you’ve chosen for question number three?

GREGORY: I pity you so~

STAN:

GREGORY: Oh if only I were to, perhaps, accidentally drop my expertly educated take on your desk...

GREGORY: You’d have all the right answers.

STAN:

GREGORY: So tempting to snag it right from the leather of my glove, is it not?

GREGORY: How unfortunate, you’ll never have the chance.

GREGORY: My superior sleight is much too nimble for your sluggish brain.

STAN:

GREGORY: I remember the distinct eye twitches he would get whenever I would pull out my most cunning of conflict.

GREGORY: He would not say a thing, I’m sure because he was simply too afraid to fight back at the time.

GREGORY: However, he didn’t always remain so silent and tame...

GREGORY: I would say around middle school... that is when we’d really go at each others throats.

GREGORY: Such a gruesomely exquisite time.

GREGORY: We’d even write our personal hate letters to each other, oh how I admire those days.

GREGORY: I would always look forward to the times where he’d write me back on the very same paper I would send to him.

GREGORY: A rivalry between two people is a much more intimate experience than one would be lead to believe.

GREGORY: You could, perhaps, even put it on par with a committed relationship of sorts.

GREGORY: And ours, I can say, was long term.

GREGORY: Around the age of 16, I began deploying newer, fresher tactics to our commitment.

GREGORY: After an inspiring couple of months of coaching actors for the play of Romeo and Juliet-- of which he was one of the leads-- I understood just what made him tick a little more.

GREGORY: OH, woe is ME...

GREGORY: STANLEY MARSH, ignoring me on his way home from school yet AGAIN...

STAN: Gregory, for the love of god, stop calling me Stanley.

GREGORY: How now, you speak my name?

GREGORY: I may just faint!

GREGORY: Nary a “dude” or “jack*ss” in sight!

STAN: Should I even bother asking how the hell you censored yourself.

GREGORY: What a delight this is, you’ve yet to lead your trek homewards...

GREGORY: Perhaps you’re wishing for... gasp... more of my utterly enthralling acting skills to be passed down to you?

STAN: If you ever get closer than two feet from me again I’m seriously gonna vom, dude.

GREGORY: No longer did I get grunts and eye rolls, no no.

GREGORY: Ever since those fateful months, I’ve gotten full blown... dare I say, reactions from him.

GREGORY: Our last committed interaction, even, gave more than the letters or eye twitches ever could.

GREGORY: I arrived one day to his house-- a residence in which I rarely visited.

GREGORY: In fact, I don’t believe I had ever even stepped foot into his upper floor before this particular instance.

GREGORY: I was there, strictly for... competition if I recall.

GREGORY: ...Hi Stanley...

STAN: What the

STAN: How did you get in my house???

GREGORY: Your oh so dearest mother let me inside after pitying the cold, frozen state I was left outside in.

STAN: Uh, how did you get TO my house??????????

STAN: I live like. Miles and miles out of town.

GREGORY: I see you do not share the pity your mother gave me.

GREGORY: As I expected.

STAN: Uhhh...

STAN: I’m like.

STAN: Busy hanging out with my friends dude...

GREGORY: That I can see, and smell.

GREGORY: I recognize the smell of production.

GREGORY: You know, I’m not stranger to such a thing.

GREGORY: I’ve partaken once before.

GREGORY: Perhaps I can show you and your friends how it’s really done.

STAN: I think that’s probably the funniest thing you’ve ever said.

GREGORY: Oh, but no laughter I hear.

GREGORY: Move aside, dearest Stanley.

GREGORY: Watch me wow your friends with my terrifically rebel-like, utterly cannabis-orientated skills.

GREGORY: Ultimately, the experience did not go over well.

GREGORY: Within those last four hours at his house... That was the last time I had spoken to him.

GREGORY: Until now, that is...

GREGORY: How my heart yearns for our rivalry to continue.

GREGORY: Mayhaps it is bittersweet fate that he be my cabin mate...

GREGORY: Perhaps we could fix what has been damaged...

GREGORY: Lest our “what once was” never again turns present-tense.

GREGORY: How cruel the mistress of fate would have to be for us to never be the same.

STAN: First my parents push me into this without even giving me so much as a warning.

STAN: Now I’m stuck with Sir Douchealot the third for a whole summer.

STAN: So awesome.

GREGORY: Oh, the dilemma we have found ourselves in...

STAN: Ugh.

GREGORY: How will this summer ever be so grand...

GREGORY: When again will the seasons light shimmer through to my soul?

STAN: Ugggggh.

GREGORY: What will become of me--

STAN: Can’t you just act normal for a change?

STAN: Just shut up already.

GREGORY: OH!!!

GREGORY: QUE C’EST FAUTE!

GREGORY: To go on is to watch my last innocent months wither before my very eyes, never to experience the joys of this camp ever again!

STAN: Maybe I can request a transfer or something...

GREGORY: Trapped within the bounds of these wooden walls, fated to fight amongst each other like animals...

STAN: I’m not going to fight you, what are you on.

GREGORY: O, doth the beanied fellow carry not malice?

GREGORY: Is it not the entire reason you’ve stepped through that door?

STAN: Yeah I totally came in here expecting to see you, stupid.

STAN: What have you been doing in here?

STAN: How long have you even been in this cabin?

GREGORY: Documenting my experiences thus far on what was meant to be a most joyous summer...

GREGORY: Until now...

GREGORY: Oh...!

STAN: Wait seriously.

STAN: You brought your whole laptop here?

STAN: How did they allow that.

STAN: They took my freaking phone away.

STAN: Is

STAN: Does that journal say “summer memories?”

STAN: Is this a leather back journal? 

STAN: Jesus christ, dude.

GREGORY: Mockery!

GREGORY: It has already begun!

GREGORY: You’ve nuzzled your way into my life, now you’re eating me from the inside out like a parasite!

STAN: You are making NO SENSE.

STAN: you’re the worst. you’re the worst. you’re th

GREGORY: A rope! My tears cascade down my cheeks!

GREGORY: I collapse to the floor, the weight of my sorrows too heavy for my shoulders to bear any longer!

STAN: I hate that this isn’t even the first time you’ve done this crap.

STAN: I hate that I’m used to this.

GREGORY: Tap... tap tap...

GREGORY: Tap, the droplets drum the floor, distinctly crestfallen in their beat.

GREGORY: “What is that?” you ask...

STAN: I don’t.

GREGORY: They are tears, I cry.

GREGORY: To bunk with my most horrid of rivals.

GREGORY: To be side by side with the man who hates every fiber of my being...

GREGORY: This makes me cry, can’t you see?

STAN: First off, no I can’t.

STAN: You’re just sort of

STAN: Sort of making a pool of water on the ground.

STAN: Second of all, we haven’t even talked in months.

STAN: We’re not rivals.

STAN: I don’t hate every part of you, just... most of you.

STAN: Maybe if you did less of whatever this is, I wouldn’t hate you as much.

GREGORY: Sniffle... sniffle hic...

STAN: You really don’t need to say the words out loud, I get it.

GREGORY: Do... do mine ears deceive me?

GREGORY: Is this some sort of truce?

GREGORY: Are we looking for common grounds?

STAN: Didn’t say that, but that’s probably how you’re gonna take it anyways.

GREGORY: I suppose...

GREGORY: If I am to be glued to the side of my enemy for my trek through summer blast...

GREGORY: It would only be just, that I attempt to appease such a beast.

GREGORY: I will do my best, your foulness...

GREGORY: Acting not as my own skin for your amusement, if that is what it takes...

STAN: Cool, sure.

STAN: Whatever.

GREGORY: All I ask in turn is...

GREGORY: May you not ridicule me more for my most personal of actions...?

GREGORY: Please, O mighty...

GREGORY: ...Grant me allowance to continue the documentation of my... m-my unrestrained summer fun...

GREGORY: Even if it is within a custom-engraved 50$ hard leatherback notebook (medium weight grade).

STAN: I don’t care.

STAN: I so, so, so do not care.

GREGORY: Then...

GREGORY: It has been decided.

GREGORY: Enemies to friends, perhaps...?

GREGORY: [Chuckles absently...]

GREGORY: Only time will tell...

...

GREGORY: SCENE!

GREGORY: Oh, that has to be one of my best impromptu performances yet!

GREGORY: This is why I always wear waterproof eyeliner.

GREGORY: Stan, while I may detest your vile insides so, perhaps we can make this work out!

GREGORY: After all, I’m sure South Park’s failed star athlete won’t be ruffling any of my feathers anyhow.

GREGORY: Just pretend you don’t exist and I’ll do the same, mhm?

GREGORY: I’ve more important matters to attend to, hope you enjoyed the show.

GREGORY: Oh, the endless possibilities here...

GREGORY: I’ve had far more dreams than I am willing to admit, where I would be bunking with specific friends of mine.

GREGORY: All such combinations provide limitless amounts of fun!

GREGORY: Though I will say, I rather imagined three others with me, as I was told that was the standard amount of members per cabin.

GREGORY: But if I am to be stuck with two instead of three, it just makes my wishes that much more close to my heart.

GREGORY: Quite easy to list of people the more space you have on paper...

GREGORY: When you wish for so many, however, and you only have a single sticky note to write upon, you’d pick the closest of close to you, would you not?

GREGORY: Of course, my mind flutters across my friends in the theatre department first and foremost.

GREGORY:  I have many close friends in that class, though I’d be lying if I said I’d be willing to spend my entire summer with every single one of them at night.

GREGORY: Mark Cotswolds, a dear friend of mine-- he’s a fine actor, and rather quiet and polite otherwise. He is one I would enjoy to see.

GREGORY: ...I don’t really see him as the type to drop everything and jump into the world of nature, though...

GREGORY: Of course, my friend Pip would be lovely, but seeing as how he’d left the same time I had from the main hall, I can assume he was assigned a separate cabin from my own.

GREGORY: Hmm... who else am I so close with that I’d wish for their arrival?

GREGORY: Gary Harrison, perhaps.

GREGORY: Perhaps he isn’t quite the closest friend of mine, but a ray of sunshine nonetheless!

GREGORY: Perhaps I’d fancy a fresher face, one who I have long since drifted from.

GREGORY: One who’s an entirely new experience all together?

GREGORY: Wouldn’t that be a pleasant surprise--

GREGORY: (Oh my stars, as if on cue!)

GREGORY: (Who could have opened the doorway to a whole summer of fun?)--

GREGORY: MM!

STAN MARSH, GREGORY’S CHILDHOOD RIVAL. YOU KNOW THE ONE THAT HE JUST NEVER REALLY LIKED AS A KID, BUT SORTA GREW OUT OF IT AS HE GOT OLDER? THAT STAN MARSH: ,,

GREGORY: (Do my eyes deceive me?)

GREGORY: (Surely what is lain before me cannot be true.)

STAN: (Oh my God.)

STAN: (Ohhhh my God.)

STAN: (Of all the people...)

GREGORY: YOU.

GREGORY: Now see this, I haven’t a clue.

GREGORY: I’ve heard the occasional muttering of summer camp amongst my peers in school...

GREGORY: Aside from one friend, I hadn’t heard a peep from any of my other friends whether or not they were going to attend summer camp this year.

GREGORY: As it isn’t optional, I’m sure many a student opted out of this enrichment program in favour of summer break.

GREGORY: Unfortunately, as well, the orientations here are hourly, as students arrive on their own schedule.

GREGORY: And to add the fact that there just aren’t very many people in South Park compared to... any other larger town, it leaves very few people who would be willing to spend their summer weeks here all alone.

GREGORY: However... as I had mentioned, there is one friend of mine who would talk for hours on end about their attendance at Sun Valley this year.

GREGORY: That would be my lovely friend, Pip.

GREGORY: I spotted him during orientation, though I doubt he was aware of my presence.

GREGORY: His eyes were glued to that friend of his-- a lady he talked of rather often.

GREGORY: I believe her name is Estella, and she doesn’t attend South Park High School-- nor does she even live in the states at all.

GREGORY: All I’ve heard this last week from Pip was that he was so thrilled that he was able to arrange for her to visit and partake in this summer escapade with him.

GREGORY: Though I’m not quite sure what the limitations are for interaction during activities here in summer camp-- I’m to believe that those who identify as female are boarded in separate cabins from those who identify as male.

GREGORY: Ah, the simplicity of modern day education and their old fashioned gender normativities...

GREGORY: However, I’m sure I will be able to have fun with my fellow friend, as well as this Estella figure.

GREGORY: Oh!

GREGORY: There were a couple of other familiar faces I had witnessed during orientation, though I had no prior knowledge to their attendance.

GREGORY: I had the... fortunate... pleasure of standing right next to a fellow drama club colleague while I was in the main hall.

GREGORY: Petuski, as he prefers not to be called (but catch me deceased speaking so casually of his first name).

GREGORY: I certainly hadn’t expected his presence here.

GREGORY: Aside from his hygienic preferences, he’s always been quite the hoot to preform in plays with.

GREGORY: Often I find myself wishing I was a background character, so he would have the stage all to himself, and so that I would not have to occupy the space beside him.

GREGORY: It’s a rarity you would hear this from me, but I assure you...

GREGORY: He’s certainly got a way of being the perfect single man act.

GREGORY: ...Ehem...

GREGORY: The other acquaintance of mine that I had met up with was one of the make up artists for theatre class.

GREGORY: I almost missed her, I was just on my way out of the main hall when she had arrived, ready for the next round of orientation.

GREGORY: I would consider her and I decent friends, never any bad blood between us.

GREGORY: Pleasant to talk to, and absolutely terrific with her make up skills.

GREGORY: I’m always thrilled to have her do me up before a show-- she could make quite a lot of money doing what she does.

GREGORY: That’s a conversation for another, more Sophie-related log, though.

GREGORY: I’m glad to have seen her face here, and look forward to meeting up with her again throughout the coming weeks.

GREGORY: Oh, while few and far between, it’s nice to know that there are friends-- or in one case a friend of a friend-- to enjoy this experience with me.

GREGORY: I did not expect more than one or two friends of mine to attend summer camp alongside me, clearly shown by the fact that I had signed up on my lonesome to begin with.

GREGORY: But seeing their faces will brighten my day just that much more here, I am sure of it.

GREGORY: It is an exciting thought to imagine who else will be attending summer camp, as well.

GREGORY: There were many orientations before mine, and a few that have yet to proceed it.

GREGORY: Who knows who else will show themselves in these wonderful campgrounds?

GREGORY: Oh my, thank you!

GREGORY: I do consider myself rather fashionable as well, I’m flattered you could tell just from a single photo.

GREGORY: And of course, a man such as myself would never spare any expense while packing clothing.

GREGORY: I have my whole wardrobe for the next several weeks here at camp.

GREGORY: While I would have preferred more than six outfits for a trip so lengthy, I was only permitted to bring one suitcase.

GREGORY: Such a shame, I had so many others packed for the occasion.

GREGORY: I have a handful of outfits planned out, this one I am wearing included.

GREGORY: I would have preferred to approach the camp site with a little more style, but as a camp member I was expected to arrive in orientation with their assigned camp attire-- a rather simple T-shirt.

GREGORY: What goes well with a white T-shirt with a few trees on it?

GREGORY: Nearly nothing, I must say.

GREGORY: But I’ve made do, for now.

GREGORY: Of course, there are many more outfits for me to wear for the rest of my time here, anyhow.

GREGORY: Alongside my current get up, I’ve brought four other sets of clothing I figure would suit me well in the vast expanse of nature.

GREGORY: I made sure to pick out a couple of floral patterns so I could really immerse myself into the wilderness.

GREGORY: Some extra shoes, in case I have to do any walking...

GREGORY: Sunglasses if I’ll be spending any time out from under the shade of mother nature’s finest leaved sunguards...

GREGORY: Even gloves, if I were to possess the desire to touch part of nature.

GREGORY: The last thing I need are splinters in my nails after deciding to take a closer look at a pinecone!

GREGORY: And of course I’ve brought my nighttime attire as well.

GREGORY: Normally I prefer to alternate between a few different pyjamas, but I guess a wilderness camp is but a step away from LARPing as a caveman, ohoh.

GREGORY: Over all I would say I am rather underpacked in the clothing department, but I love the challenge of mix and matching these articles of clothing to make, possibly, entirely new outfits!

GREGORY: My name is Gregory.

GREGORY: It is currently the 9th of June, I am freshly 18 as of three days ago, and this is my first day at Sun Valley’s wilderness and survival skills summer camp.

GREGORY: As this coming school year will be my last year at South Park High school, this summer was the last opportunity to try camp as an extracurricular activity.

GREGORY: Now, I’ve read many a thing about summer camps online, and just how many different types there are!

GREGORY: So of course I thought: “Splendid, I would be able to choose a camp that would cater to my interests and desired skill sets for the future!”

GREGORY: Unsurprisingly however, South Park is not quite what you would consider a big name town, by any means. Quite the opposite, in fact.

GREGORY: Which also means my options for summer camp were rather limited to...

GREGORY: Well, only one!

GREGORY: While I may not see myself using wildlife survival skills any time in my planned future, I figured it wouldn’t hurt to delve into the life of a wilderness expert, especially since it is my last opportunity to do so.

GREGORY: Why, you may ask, don’t I just wait until I’ve graduated and attend some form of adult summer camp instead?

GREGORY: Social prowess, my dear friends!

GREGORY: This school-operated, grade-specific summer camp means I will be able to experience the “wonders of nature” with people I know from high school.

GREGORY: While I may not see eye to eye with all that reside within my age group, I’d say voluntarily spending weeks out in nature is a far more exciting experience with grademates rather than complete strangers, wouldn’t you agree?

GREGORY: I digress, however.

GREGORY: This is my first time, I dare say ever, on a camping trip of any sorts-- both academic and personal.

GREGORY: I’m not quite sure what to expect, but I finished listening through orientation earlier this morning so I think I’m rather set!

GREGORY: I’ve packed a variety of needs, including this laptop which I am using to digitally document my days here to all who are curious.

GREGORY: They wouldn’t allow phones on camp grounds, however a school-assigned laptop seemed to be just fine for them.

GREGORY: Rather silly, isn’t it?

GREGORY: While I may not be using it for its intended use right now, I think it’s for the greater good of documentation.

GREGORY: I’ve also chosen to keep a weekly log in my notebook as well, for more of a personal remembrance more than anything.

GREGORY: It’s still rather early in the day, and campers are still being assigned their dormitory cabins, so day one of this log will have to wait until a little more has happened in the day.

GREGORY: I was one of the early birds to the camp grounds, so patiently await the faces that step through this cabin’s doors.

GREGORY: There are a total of three beds in this cabin-- one bunk bed and one twin.

GREGORY: I wonder why three and not four...?

GREGORY: I suppose it doesn’t matter.

GREGORY: Come, live vicariously through my digital documentation of this adventure!