Russian moments in Heated Rivalry

Hi! Shanya is okay in general, the Russian fandom has acquired the diminutive and uses it as well.

I’m very happy that the fandom has discovered such cute Russian pet names as kotyonok, solnyshko, dorogoy and so on. Good job, guys! People do use them when talking to their partners, spouses or children. I’ll give my opinion on those fandom nicknames as a person born and raised in Russia before moving to a different country. One important thing: I will start with general notes using hetero couples as an example, you'll understand later why (it’s a long read).

From my experience, most Russian men use pet names twice less often than women. Well, maybe it was my fault to chose wrong men with communication issues, and other Russians would disagree with me… Yet, I’ll still say that an average Russian man has a small vocabulary of words and phrases to show affection. Usually, it’s women, who use various nicknames for their partners, best friends and children (and they don't repeat them, every person has their own nickname, sometimes even several), and men either don't use such words or choose one and keep it.

So, if a tough Russian man wants to use a pet name, what options would he have? 1. The safest option is a short form of his partner’s name + a diminutive suffix

Russian is a flexible language, and it has lots of different ways to form new words. And the name system usually put learners of Russian into a coma (probably a topic for the next post). How would it look like? A man dates a woman called Elena (Елена). A short form of Elena is Lena (Лена). We take a root “Len” and a suffix “ochk,” then add an inflection “a”. (Лен + очк + а). It makes Lenochka, Леночка. That’s it. 

2. Common pet names

Usually cute animals, or something small, or words with diminutive suffixes. You already know some of them, solnyshko is “little sun,” kotyonok is “a kitten,” malysh or detka is “a baby,” luchik is “a small ray of light.”

3. Something ironic or fun, unexpected word choice, inner jokes

A strange word, that’s rarely used as a pet name. Or, a really formal way of addressing, like a full name + patronymic (Ilya Grigoryevich, Elena Alexandrovna…), but usually said ironically or playfully. Some people can even call their beloved ones by their surnames, though also playfully or ironically. 

Now let’s move to Ilya. I’ll highlight some key moments in his story, which, in my opinion, define a lot in his character, including language habits.

As I mentioned, affectionate language is usually associated with women, not men (traditional views on gender roles). Boys can hear pet names either from their moms or girlfriends, if they actually do so (there are also women who don't use such a language). Ilya’s mom died when he was 12. Grigoriy in books and the show doesn't look like a man who can be soft with his sons. We don't have any information if his new wife was close with Ilya and his brother. And the brother… Well, you got it.

Second, Ilya is a professional hockey player. Children can officially join hockey schools at the age of 5 but some start even earlier, at 3 or 4. At some point, Ilya’s talent became obvious, and his coach told so his parents, so they decided to invest into his career. What does it mean?

Practices, routine, discipline, low tolerance to mistakes, high expectations. One important cultural moment. Ilya was born in June 1991, right before the USSR disappeared. Russian sport schools inherited Soviet sport traditions. I think everyone is familiar with some stereotypes about the coaching style in the Soviet Union, right? Moreover, here is a fact from rl. The Russian society started to think about the coaching style only in the mid 2010-s, maybe even later (figure skating and rhythmic gymnastics caused the biggest discussions). Some people started to think that coaches are too strict to children, some believed that nobody could become no. 1 without strict discipline. Why am I saying this? Ilya was likely raised in a tough environment with zero tolerance to mistakes and weakness. Maybe, a children’s coach was chill and fun at the begging but when it became clear that Ilya could make it to the professional hockey league, the coaching style must have changed. Also, if you watch videos with mic’d up hockey players, you’ll hear lots of profanity. Even though they usually remember that people can hear their words and maybe even try to watch their language for the first 5 minutes.

So, Ilya had no place where he could learn affectionate language. Neither his family, nor his environment could teach him so. Btw, it’s a good trope for therapy sessions, when Galina asks Ilya how he shows his feelings to people.

Okay, Ilya doesn’t speak affectionate language but he has dated women and probably figured at some point that if he calls Svetlana Svetohcka, Svetik or malyshka, it can give him some benefits. But Ilya is dating a man.

Shane is a professional athlete too, who lifts heavy weights, gets punched in the face or in the ribs regularly, had a concussion and a fractured collarbone. His mom is not just “a regular mom” but a manager, so they shift their roles from “mom and son” to “manager and client.” So, Shane probably hasn’t really heard lots of pet names in his life too, though his family is obviously healthier than Ilya’s. He’s half Japanese, and when he started his professional journey, hockey was mostly white (and it’s still like that, though there’re more biracial players than it used to be). Shane definitely heard racial slurs and had to answer them. Moreover, his vocabulary is also not roses and honey, how many times did he call Ilya an asshole?

So, Shane for Ilya is still a part of the hypermasculine world with little room for sentiments (do you have though such a word in English, lol). Even if Ilya wakes up one day with a perfect affectionate vocabulary, there’s no guarantee that Shane would immediately like it. He’ll probably be surprised.

Also, if we talk about kotyonok. In some fics, Ilya compares Shane to “a kitten” when he’s angry (Russian fic writers sometimes do it too btw). Well, children may look cute when angry (though some parents would disagree after dealing with their screaming angel for an hour). But a 185 cm meter tall, 90 kg hockey player would probably look scary when he’s angry, wouldn’t he? If we stay in the feline world, then it would be an angry tiger, I guess.

So, what to do if you wanna make Ilya a hot thing with the tongue well hung, not a man with avoidant attachment behavior and communication issues?

Rachel Reid already did it. If you remember, Ilya uses strange pet names for Shane, like moy pomidor (my tomato). IMHO, it suits Ilya’s character perfectly. He kinda uses a phrase reminding a pet name but chooses a strange, not cute or sexy word for it, and he does it in Russian, which Shane doesn’t speak. Shane doesn’t understand the phrase and gets confused, unsure whether he was just insulted or praised. He googles pomidor, figures out it means tomato and… He either laughs or rolls his eyes, and calls Ilya an asshole. Perfect.

I also find this option safe for them, if we talk about the timeline when they’re still in the closet. Like, Ilya gets drunk at the charity evening or after the All Stars game and suddenly calls Shane something. If he says kotyonok in front of Russian-speaking players, they might be fucked up. But if Ilya says pomidor, he can get away with it, explaining to the Russians that he just mocks Shane, using random words he wouldn’t understand.

What can you do as fic writer when you wanna use kotyonok or solnyshko?

Just go for it. You like these words, your audience does too, it’s a match. Fanfiction is for fun, we don’t write academic papers there. You own your fantasy.

What can you do, if you wanna add some “Russian spice” but still keep Ilya affectionate?

Just keep in mind his background and let him learn things. You can show his development, how he started with “boring” and moy pomidor and then moved to solnyshko. There could be a difference after their coming out, like Ilya could be more relaxed when they don’t need to hide anymore. You can compare him to Shane, how would Shane react when he turned from “boring” to malysh? Would he stop using “asshole” as an equivalent for “I love you” in this case?

Hi! I was born in the same country with our Bad Hockey Boy, and I’ve also moved to a different place seeking something new, and I do share some traumas with Ilya, but it’s a different story.

I’m happy to see how many people fell for Mr. Rozanov, and I do appreciate all the research you guys did when writing about Ilya. However, some things may stay unnoticeable from a distance, as you need to experience them yourself. I decided to write several posts on common tropes that authors use in fanfics and give them some comments based on my… Well, nationality, upbringing and experience I had while living in the environment different from the U.S, Canada or other countries. Shoutout to my (non-Russian) friend S., who inspired me to write this post with a simple message “I have a question about how people view Ilya in the fandom. Like, there’s always this idea that he’s more touchy-feely because ‘he’s European’. Do you think he would?”

My honest answer is “no” but with some exceptions. Before you come for me in the comments, lemme explain.

First, “European” is a pretty vague term in general. The European Union consists of 27 countries, each of them has a different culture and different social norms. We cannot put Sweden and Spain, for example, in the same box, the differences in how people interact with each other in those countries would be huge. Moreover, Belgium and the Netherlands are already two different things though you can travel from one country to another in one hour by train. So, we can’t call “Europeans” being touchy-feely simply because we always need to clarify “What part of Europe are we talking about?” Next, Russia is not even a part of the EU, has never been and God knows if joins one day. Yes, there have always been some cultural exchange (sometimes less, sometimes more) between Russia and several European countries but, again, we need to clarify what European countries, to what extent and so on. Also, there is a big question how Russians see themselves, do they agree with being called European? I haven’t conducted a survey on this topic but I have a suspicion that answers may vary drastically.

Second, let’s consider some Russian cultural norms. I’m pretty sure you’ve seen different memes about “Russians never smile.” This is a well known stereotype that… Well, not a stereotype actually, and it goes far beyond a Slavic stare and frozen facial muscles. Russians don’t do small talks. Russians don’t chat with strangers on a bus or in line in the supermarket. Russians usually don’t put any effort to get know their neighbors better. Yeah, sure, personal traits always matter, extroverts and chatterboxes exist everywhere. Also regional differences may play a role a bit (Russia is huge and ethnically diverse). Still, a distance between people matters. And the bigger it is, the better. Would you expect someone from such an environment being touchy-feely? 

Third, let’s move to Ilya and his background. He’s a man born and raised in the country with pretty traditional views on masculinity. He’s also a professional athlete and has built his career in a tough and, again, a stereotypically masculine sport. Ilya and Shane have to stay in the closet, otherwise they will get themselves into troubles. In Ilya’s case, the possible troubles are a little bit different from Shane’s. Why would he risk almost the only good thing he has with his own (literally) hands? What if other athletes, jerks like Dallas Kent, notice the way he touches Shane’s shoulder? Or what if they see the difference between other people (Ilya never touches them) and Shane (Ilya cannot stop touching Hollander)? 

However, I also see Ilya as a man deprived from any tenderness from his early childhood (I don’t think Grigory ever hugged him or kissed him in a forehead). He probably craves for a physical touch and substitutes it with sex, as a “legal” source to get some. So, I would imagine that as soon as the door closes and they can stop pretending… Well, Shane would probably need some arnica ointment to hide all the love marks.

Also, I shared my opinion on the situation when they’re both in the closet. If they come out, I can imagine Ilya taking revenge for all those years of hiding, and he may actually enjoy showing (sometimes even showing off) their relationship to the world. Though, he MUST hold by this time a different citizenship. Probably, the therapy can help too.

And a really important note. If you’re a fic writer and you see Ilya as a touchy-feely man, and this feature is important for your storyline… Please, go ahead! Fanfiction is pure fun, you should enjoy it, so, please, just do you. If you’re a reader, who likes reading about Ilya expressing his feelings with touching Shane in public, please, enjoy the stories you like! 

AND DON’T USE MY POST TO BULLY AUTHORS OR TO WRITE SHITTY COMMENTS ABOUT THEIR WORKS. 

My goal was to give you some background information as an “insider.”

If you have any questions or would like me to write about other cultural moments, please, lemme know in the comments.