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dbejfdewfbwekf-deactivated20211

*girl is born* time to start preparing her for marriage

*boy turns 30* i know you are still a child but just pretend to get your life enough bit together so that other parents can give you their daughter she can take it from there you can go back being a baby nbd

The author: “THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS TRYING TO WARN PEOPLE ABOUT.” Some rando: “No it wasn’t. You’re reading too much into it.”

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I’d like to plaster this around the world honestly.

brainscrewz

i hope all of jenna marbles's dogs live forever. i want them to outlive me. i'll sell my soul for those little dudes

twynksdisease

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hydro-homies

🔪Representation🔪matters🔪

houseofjonn

impatient14

Golden Girls was more progressive decades ago than half of America now.

girlsuggestion

contrary to popular belief, what men think of you is honestly like the least important thing ever lol

penny-anna

having a job is very weird bcos by and large your coworkers will be a variety of ages and you will not all be at the same stage of life. your coworker will be like, well I’m off home to spend time with my husband & child, what are you going to do with your evening? and you’re like, well, I plan on playing Rollercoaster Tycoon for as much as it as possible

king-monky

Angels in the Bible: “Hey do you - stop screaming I’m sent by God - do you need help getting out of this situation?”

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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capacity

leona lewis didnt have to do that 2 me w bleeding love i was too young to have those feelings

necromancier-deactivated2019120

how to adult:

make lots of lists

make your bed

send lots of emails and only cry maximum 5 minutes before making phone calls

scream only mildly internally when strangers talk to you

laundry sometimes

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