“You’re the walking personification of a fart.”
“Can you do me a favor? Just…stop breathing.”
“Wow, look what the cat dragged in…”
“You’re about as useful as an expired coupon.”
“And here, ladies and gentlemen, we have the world’s biggest turd.”
“Please, shut up. Shut – stop talking. I’m going to kill you.”
“Have you ever thought about why no one likes you?”
“When I see you, all I think is ‘uuuugh’.”
“Shh. Stupid people shouldn’t talk.”
“Wanna know why I’m sitting? It’s because I can’t STAND you.”
“I hope you choke. Okay, no I don’t, that’s a little extreme. But leave!”
“Were you raised by wolves?”
“[text] [img attached: garbage can] i found your twin”
“How can you see when your head’s so far up your ass?”
“If I had a time machine, I’d make sure that you were never born.”
“Can do you something right for a change?”
“Hey, could you get a little lower? No, lower. Six feet under.”
“Your mother breeds like a hamster and your father smells of elderberries.”
“If I could, I’d recreate the pie scene from The Help.”
“You’re dumber than a pole.”
“You look awful. Like always.”
“I hate you more than I hate myself.”
“Think of it like this: I’m Beyonce. You’re Iggy Azalea.”
“Hey, jackass. I see you’re more jackass-y than usual today.”
“I see that they’ll let just anybody in here…”
“Where’s your warning label?”
“Look, I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry that I’m just better than you in every way.”
“Does your mother ever reflect on her mistakes? Mistakes like you.”