remiel

earlier this week Twitter user ppuccin0 tweeted about a fashion article that advised against tops with large floral patterns, saying the wearer was in danger of looking like a "ロマンティックおばさん," or a "romantic auntie." the tweet went viral with many agreeing that a "romantic auntie" sounded like a very nice thing to aspire to be, and some even posted illustrations or photos tagged with the trend

illustration by Toyota Yuu (author of Cherry Magic)

illustration by 141shkw/Sora Midori (author of Beautiful Curse)

photos by Takinami Yukari (author of Motokare Mania and Watashi-tachi wa Mutsuu Ren'ai ga Shitai or "We Want A Painless Romance")

illustration by m:m (mangaka of Matataki no End Roll)

illustration by ooinuai (mangaka of Onikui Kitan)

illustration by ma2 (mangaka of The Reason We Fall In Love)

BONUS:

Cançonetes d'Estiu | Summer Songs

[ENG] I made a little zine for @zinebash's playlist zine challenge! I'd never made one before but I'd been wanting to make a playlist of songs that I associate with this last summer - old favorites, new discoveries, and songs that hit an emotional chord <3

Individual pages and text versions below the cut, and you can listen to the playlist here!

[CAT] He fet una petita zine per al repte de @zinebash de fer una zine d'una playlist! No n'havia fet mai una zine però portava un temps volent fer una llista de cançons de l'estiu passat - vells estàndards, nous descobriments, i cançons que em van arribar al cor <3

Pàgines individuals i versió en text sota el tall, i pots escoltar la playlist aquí!

Hi Mari! Anything for you :D I went with Emily finding out, and only realised afterwards that that makes it a bit AU from The Mystery Stranger bc there, I wrote her having already gotten promoted elsewhere... well, maybe I'll fix it up somehow for ao3, but for now, here goes!

Part 1 linked above is 6k T on Ao3, Part 2 below ~1k, G, I think it can be read as a standalone one-shot, but best read Part 1 first ;)

ok to rb!

does "God" have a penis?

This doesn’t comply with the books, I realize, but it doesn’t exactly not comply either.

Why would Malfoy rip a page out of a random book? If he wanted the book, he could have just bought the book himself. He’s not poor, his family doesn’t discourage learning. He chooses to rip a particular page with a pointed glance out of a book. Why?

Think of what this and Dobby’s actions of warning have in common: Lucius Malfoy. The one who was apparently talking freely of the dangers that would face the Muggle borns this year. I think Draco knew more about what was going on, or at least figured more out, than he let on to his friends. Why? He was worried.

How does this connect to the ripped paper? How did Harry and Ron find out about the basilisk? How did Hermione?

A ripped piece of paper on basilisks.

Now we’re to assume that Hermione found this in a library book and promptly ripped it out to take with her.

But why would Hermione, with her love and care for books almost on par with the librarian, rip a page out of a book she could have just checked out? My guess is she didn’t find it in the library.

My guess is Draco somehow slipped her the piece of paper that he ripped out of a book before school started, detailing the monster he knew was in the Chamber.

Harry WAS on the right track in suspecting Draco Malfoy knew more than he let on about the Chamber of Secrets. However Harry made two miscalculations - that Draco was the heir, and that Draco had the same relationship with his friends.

The first one - that Draco was the heir - led Harry and Ron down the wrong line of questioning. Their approach was framed with the assumption Draco knew everything already and would brag about what he knew – not that Draco was just as curious as them. So right from the start, they hit a dead-end in questioning without having planned further ahead. It would have been more fruitful (in hindsight) to figure out if Draco had done any research himself and what he had found out. At the very least they could have tried to see what Draco had heard from his father who ran in Voldemort’s circles and, just as importantly, would be a fount of pureblood AND Slytherin knowledge.

If Hermione had been there, she might have been quick enough to redirect their questions, BUT the brings us to the second miscalculation of the Polyjuice Plan – Draco has a VERY different relationship with his housemates than Harry, Ron, and Hermione. Calling Crabbe and Goyle his friends would be overly generous. Cronies or lackeys is probably more accurate. Remember, Draco is at the top of the class with Hermione. He is SMART. He may brag about things to Crabbe and Goyle – though he seems to only do so when within earshot of the Golden Trio – but that doesn’t mean he’s going to tell them anything of real value.

You can tell from how the conversation goes that Crabbe and Goyle are interested to know if Draco has more info because they’ve already asked, but their questions are coming from a different place. Crabbe and Goyle are purebloods and buy into the blood purity tripe, but they are also Slytherins. Even if their strategic thinking skills are less than average, they still comprehend basic power dynamics. So they probably very gleefully want to know if this is Voldemort’s Second Coming or if there’s someone new and powerful on the scene they should ingratiate themselves with. Even if Draco also wanted to find that out, Crabbe and Goyle are idiots and there are probably smarter people in his house he could work with. Additionally, knowledge would be currency in Slytherin, and even if Draco knew more, he wouldn’t be as willing to share as Harry is with Ron and Hermione.

Likewise, if Draco harbored any concerns about someone killing mudbloods and blood traitors at school, he would certainly NEVER share that with Crabbe and Goyle. Draco knows they wouldn’t be receptive to those concerns, and expressing anything approaching those concerns would be giving Crabbe and Goyle power Draco probably would trust few, if any, with - definitely not his lackeys. As a result, Draco probably makes comments like hoping the next victim is Granger to throw anyone off the trail and/or because it’s what he knows Crabbe and Goyle expect to hear.

It’s also a literal self-preservation. If Draco doesn’t know who the heir is, then HE would be just as susceptible to being labeled a blood traitor and killed. He can’t trust ANYONE, especially not in his house. So even giving Hermione that page on the Basilisk would have to be very skillfully and covertly done.

If Harry, Ron, and Hermione had done a little more recon, they may have been able to figure out if there were any better choices among their Slytherin housemates to steal hair from. Maybe someone smart who might have wanted to help Draco in his path to Slytherin’s heir or to research it?

this has fr been bugging me for so long and i’ve never seen anyone bring it up so either i’m DUMB or i have found the fattest plot hole in harry potter and the chamber of secrets.

ok so basically, harry hears all the voices around the castle talking about ripping and killing and all that FUN STUFF and it’s the basilisk, which is why only he can hear it right.

BUT

is parselmouth not just the ability to understand ‘snake language’ and communicate with snakes ?? so it’s not a mind reading type situation ?? it’s the understanding of what snakes are actually saying when they produce noise, or 'speak’, which is why harry makes audible noise when talking back to them etc.

so based off that, for the plot of CoS to make sense, shouldn’t everyone else be able to hear hissing ? yes, they wouldn’t UNDERSTAND IT, but it doesn’t make sense that when harry brought up the voice, everyone said they didn’t hear anything and that harry was imagining it, bc for him to have been able to understand the basilisk, there would’ve had to have been audible noise from it.

like, i don’t speak spanish but that doesn’t mean that when people speak spanish around me i just don’t hear it.

so what the FUCK is up w that jk ???

if anyone has any answer pls let me know bc i might have missed some info in the book but i genuinely haven’t been able to stop thinking about this for like months lmao

edit: @ the people that say that everyone just ignored it bc hogwarts is weird and they didnt pay attention to it, sorry but i refuse to believe that the year that 'slytherins monster’, aka notorious SNAKE MAN got released, multiple children got nearly killed, and they were going to close down the school, people started hearing a random hissing and were like “oh lol hogwarts is wild, not gonna look into this any further”

-Use the password taped to the monitor

How to hack any hospital computer (L337 version for advanced security systems)

But then some mega-genius upstairs realized something: the system was only alerting for critical vital signs, but not for all vital signs that could possibly be bad.  Like, yeah, 200/130 is potentially life-threatening, but 130/90 is above ideal and can have negative effects on health.  Should the doctors be allowed to just ignore something that could negatively affect a patient’s health?  Heavens no!

So now the system generates a pop-up for any vital signs that are even slightly abnormal.  A pressure of 120/80 (once considered textbook normal, now considered slightly high) will create the pop-up.  We have increased our vigilance!

Well, no, what we’ve actually done is train doctors to click through a constant bombardment of pop-ups without looking.  We’ve destroyed their vigilance and made it much easier for them to accidentally skim past life-threatening vital signs.

But you can’t tell that to management, because you’d have to confess that you are a flawed human with limited attention resources.  They’d tell you “well, all the other doctors take every abnormal vital sign seriously, it sounds like you’re being negligent.”  And if you’re smart, you back down before you start telling the big boss all about your habit of ignoring critical safety alerts.

My dads coworker is at the front and this man comes Up and hands him a document.

The coworker took a Look at the document and while he couldn't read the things written by Hand, because he wasn't wearing his glases, he did notice the Logo of a different Bank so he's like:

"Oh, sorry sir you can't do that here! You have to go to the other Bank for this :)"

The man, visibly confused leaves, but dosen't take the document with him.

The coworker, now just as confused as the Guy actually Takes Out his glases and reads the hand written part:

So our branch had had a big takeover robbery as well as a note one. We also had a teller that had transferred to our branch after having been through a robbery. She was sweet as apple pie, hair up to the ceiling, southern lady who had just been through multiple robberies.

A guy comes in and hands her a folded note. Her immediate thought was “this guy needs to learn you don’t hand bank tellers notes. I am just not going to read that.” So how the conversation goes:

Her: how can I help you today?

Him: I’m here to get money

Her: great *hands him a withdrawal slip*

Him: all the information is on the paper

Her: to process the transaction I need you to put it on my piece of paper

SO HE FILLS OUT A WITHDRAWAL SLIP. Meanwhile another coworker is looking at her latest robbery notification email thinking the guy at the window looks a lot like him but the teller is calm and seems to be following standard transaction.

Back at the window the teller notices his name on the withdrawal slip doesn’t match the name on the account so she asks for his ID. He once again tells her all the relevant info is on the folded note but also gives her his ID and says it is his dad’s account. She tells him he will need a check from his dad to get cash. He grabs the note and leaves.

ONE HOUR LATER

Two new robbery notifications hit our emails, both branches within a mile. It is our guy. Teller goes over to the manager and sheepishly informs them he was here and the time. Security department is notified as are local police and the FBI. The FBI comes over believing that these poor tellers had been robbed for the 3rd time in a month and take her statement. She is completely embarrassed telling them how everything went down and he kept signaling to the note and telling her to read it but she was just done.

To which this FBI agent of 40 years who has been to the scene of many bank robberies (several at this branch in recent weeks) says: Ok. Let me see if I got this right, he came in fully intending to rob you. He gave you the note and you just…refused to read it? So he left and went to the bank literally across the street, handed them the exact same note, and they just handed him five grand? Do I have that correct?”

Her: I am so embarrassed

FBI: this is best thing I have ever heard. He even handed you his ID! Holy-

Her: I feel so dumb!

He was working at a 7-11 that got robbed a lot, working nights. And he was bored and read though his entire contract and learned if you're shot at work you get $200,000. Also, he hated his boss and the job.

So when a guy came in to rob him at gunpoint he got excited and was able to hatch the plan he had been pondering while dealing with a Shitty Boring Job.

"Dude. Shoot me in the leg. Right here- it'll go through and not hit anything vital and I'll be able to quit this fucking job. I'll give you fifty fucking grand to shoot me in the leg then you can take everything in the register."

One day, this guy came in and announced he was there to rob the place. This man was smoking a cigar with one hand and had a gun in the other.

My uncle pointed at the "No Smoking" sign and told him in no uncertain terms, "Put that cigar out, or finish it outside first."

This guy, bless his heart, went back outside to finish his cigar.

Bill Watterson – Calvin and Hobbes (1986)

Hergé – Tintin (1947, Tintin Magazine)

Jeff Smith – Bone (1993, Bone Holiday Special)

Walt Kelly – Pogo (1950, Maclean's Magazine)

And a bonus: