bad things happen to good butches

Making my butch run red lights or else i wont touch her

ok so the instrumentality happened and my butch gf touched another femme and turned into orange goo whats that mean

used like half of my butch’s conditioner on my bush i will be living the high live until she comes home from work

(explaining my blog to my older butch friend) okay so the tags are like an epilogue to the post. sometimes i hide a little nut or seed of text in there for my dedicated hogs. (puts a hand on her thigh) isnt it crazy that when i was in high school you already were the assistant manager in the burger king down the street from my house

buying a millstone on facebook marketplace and sending my butch to pick it up alone in her 1994 ford taurus

liking my butch’s posts so she gets a false sense of popularity

making my butch get in the topology caster

making my butch suck the raisin at the dark casino

AITA if i have a crush on the lesbian who works at the golf course as that little faggot who picks up all the golfballs and i get hard whenever i hit a ball right into the pond and she has to go in and get it

butchfemme rp where im a cliche bond villain type and i really like to make my butch henchman stand on the part of the floor she knows full well is a trapdoor and the best part is her face of anticipation as my finger hovers over the trapdoor button

message to all butches angered by my horrible and sadistic posting- dm me if u live in the greater toronto area and we can settle this in person

whenever my butch makes me mad and its my fault i sneak a couple of peanuts out of my bag and eat them so she gets distracted by me going into anaphylactic shock

spread a thin layer of silicone lube on the shower floor so that my butch slips and cracks her fucking head open on the granite walls of the shower cubicle, which she chose without checking with me first because shes the self appointed “man of the house” like sorry i dont want to shower in a fucking cave all the time dude

reminder to every butch: you are loved by god. you CAN fix that electricity or plumbing issue without looking anything up.

edging my butch w food poisoning by leaving the mayonnaise out all night and then putting it back in the fridge before she wakes up

heartbreaking: my butch is apparently “reconsidering her stance on domestic violence” after i got her with the third bucket of fluid balanced on door prank this week