#tw bad

hour 3 of therapy: and sometimes, doc, i feel like i'm up against the dive rocket launcher without an angry pumpkin to handle any of it. how am i supposed to be the architect and/or builder of my future when-

what's wrong kitten? you say you just want mild cheddar and leaf lettuce on your all-beef burger? well that's too bad, kitten. you're going to have a lamb patty with aged brie and caramelized onions on an artisanal brioche bun. if you're a good girl and eat every last bite of arugula that falls on your plate, mommy might even let you order some sweet potato wedges with honey fig spread... as long as kitten's willing to pay $USD 7.99 for them... 😈

i present to you: a non-exhaustive compilation of voice clips from dan green's role in Temptation, a two-episode hentai from 2005. this is not his only performance in such a genre but it is by far the silliest. i would like to extend my sincerest gratitude to @seekerbr for bringing this to my attention.

i wish i could do that thing that americans do where they post like their experiences are universal except do it about aotearoa but im also from america (moved to aotearoa when i was 3 but i sound like i arrived this morning) and i cant do that bit without it coming off as me being american about living in aotearoa so im passing this bit to you as a real kiwi who can probably pull that bit off better than anyone