Deconstruction of Motherhood
Moominmamma is often sited as the epitome of a perfect mother. She embodies all traits most people wish to find in a mother. She is kind, patient, generous and so loving that all small creatures passing her way can instantly become her children. Her diligent housework lets everyone else enjoy the freedom of enjoying a comfortable home and delicious food without any effort. Moominpappa is free to spend his days writing or dreaming of adventures because of her constant support. Moominmamma is also free of all the negative aspects this kind of mothering might bring, as she is never controlling, smothering or makes people around her feel quilty for her efforts.
All of this makes Moominmamma an iconic character loved by fans from all ages. Her very name has become a synonym for perfect mother in Finland where Moomin books originate from.
However, this idealistic image is deconstructed later by none other than Tove Jansson in her own writing. She was never a mother herself, but her keen inspection of people around her as well as her dependent relationship with her mother allowed her to study motherhood with sharpness that is rare even in modern works. Later Moomin books deconstruct the idea of a perfect mother and idealistic performance of motherhood by showing how much emotional labor this requires and how most family members, especially husbans, can be very inconsiderate.
Moominmamma’s character is first challenged in Moominpappa at Sea (1965). In this book, Moominpappa imposes his personal mid-life crisis on his family by deciding to move them to a remote island. As always, Moominmamma patiently accepts his decision, packs their belongings and follows him without complaints. She ensures that children will have a comfortable home in the lighthouse and diligently supports her husband who tries and fails to find what he is looking for. All the while she kindly watched over their maturing son.
But then the book goes deeper into Moominmamma’s situation and feelings. She tries to hide it, but the new situation is actually unbearable for her and she misses her home desperately. Because she is the perfect mother, she cannot impose this on others like her husband. Instead, she starts painting her beloved valley until she occasionally disappears from her family entirely. But because she has always been available, her husband and son take her for granted so much that they barely notice her disappearances. Only the other female in their family, their adopted daughter, notices the mother’s crisis.
Despite the book being dedicated to her father, who Jansson loved, the narrative is also sharply critical of fatherhood and especially how husbans can expect their wives to be emotionally available for their personal whims. The book takes time to focus on the toll this takes on the mother and wife, who wants to perform her expected role. While Moominmamma is always available to support others, she is left completely without support when she needs it in turn. The performance of perfect motherhood demands being so successfull at being loving and caring, that nobody needs to stop and consider what this costs said mother. And it does indeed cost Moominmamma quite a lot, because her role is so demanding.
In the end, the family does find harmony again and Moominmamma realizes that she can no longer go back to the painting. But this comes only after Moominpappa has taken time to realize that his selfish actions has impacted his family and Moomintroll starts to become less dependant on his mother. Moominmamma’s feelings will start to get noticed all the while her burden will be lifted even if just a bit. Because even in Moominvalley, nobody should be expected to be so self-sacrificing and perfect.
Last Moomin book, Moominvalley in November (1971), finishes this deconstruction in Toft’s arc by taking a look at perfect motherhood from a child’s perspective. Toft is an orphan who dreams of seeing Moominmamma in person. He does not know her personally, but is convinced that she is the perfect mother who will love him unconditionally. He travels to Moominvalley and stays there to wait for the family to return. During his wait, he lets his image of Moominmamma and her perfect motherhood grow. She becomes kinder, more patient and softer as time passes until she is such a perfect embodiment of loving that it almost hurts him to think of her anymore. Toft himself gets apalled by his image of her.
Eventually, Toft realized that he need to accept that Moominmamma is a mother but also a person, who has actual feelings and can get angry like everyone else. And he accepts that he wants a mother who is an actual person instead of an idealized picture with no negative qualities. He lets go of his need to possess a person who exists only for him and instead wants to meet a mother who he can support as well. The conclusion of his arc confirms that the perfect mother is an unrealistic dream that might not even be worth pursuing. Letting go of this image is a key part of maturing.
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