Mx. Sinister

the age old question of do i want to be in pain for self hating reasons or masochist reasons

i want to get worse !!! i want to look visibly sick !!! i want to starve and cut and reduce myself to nothing !!!

am i normal yet can i start a podcast

i'm going to--*remembers suicide jokes only worsen my mental health*--kill myself

okij willl sotp poijusting fo5r nkow goodjnight tijme beinfg

huurt hurth hurt hurhtj huhrt

uhrts toi brinmk water o w

isanyone goijng to put me to bed please

ouch :/

tired. headache. want to relapse. mouth hurts. face hurts. really just a general sense of hurt . looking yucky gross. i had thigh highs on to feel cute but they look weird on my body and i am too skinny and it's gross. i wish i could be more than a puddle of motor oil but sadly we can't always have our way. have i mentioned the hurt. might go to sleep soon i don't know. are you supposed to hurtfor no reason? maybe if you're a bad person and god hates you maybe. sleep time? want to be cute loved. ow head.

okay i did not end up relapsing i got distracted by mcr lore videos and now im too tired rest assured it will happen #tomorrow for sure !!!

"your younger self would be so proud" my younger self is convinced that we're going to hell and would encourage us to keep self harming to get used to pain

have we considered that i am in pain because i am a bad person

i purchased more antiseptic which means it's #relapse time !!!!!

my mom said she'd look into getting dentist appointments #finally locking in on your children's wellbeing

this has got me thinking about all the other times my parents neglected to get me or my siblings medial attention,,,