fast depressarini’s

He is pretty sure that he can be a decent dad. He is a great, awesome dad, but chances are he’ll never fully believe that. Especially after the whole Chris-in-Texas parenthesis. However, he knows he can successfully babysit a toddler and survive, making sure that they both make it through the day and he can return said toddler safe to his parent (which is a thought he’d probably associate with a postal package but… he’s stressed). That’s what he keeps reminding himself while he follows Theo around the house.

He never told Buck, but there’s no mistaking this kid for anyone other than Buck’s son. And Eddie kind of loves it. Part of Eddie, after hearing all about Buck’s childhood, wishes he could teleport back in time and hold baby Buck, protecting him from all harm, but that’s probably just his paternal instincts taking over him from time to time. Taking care of Theo gives him the impression that he’s doing something good for Buck, and for baby Buck.

However, whenever he’s with the kid, especially when they are alone, he doesn’t have much room to sit down and think. And he loves it. Really. He doesn’t mind at all that Theo is such an energetic and intelligent kid. If anything, he loves him for it.

The problem is that his brain-to-mouth filter is completely gone most of the time.

And that’s something that Eddie definitely does not like. Especially since realizing how in love he is with his best friend.

Buck is the most important person in his life after Christopher, and he cannot and won’t jeopardize that.

Except that Theo probably has other plans for him. Because it’s not Eddie’s fault that the kid has begged him for ice cream and not his fault that he can’t resist him, so now they’re trying not to get chocolate ice cream all over his couch and Theo is completely covered in it.

It’s not Eddie’s fault, really. Theo keeps giggling and Eddie is a little bit tired. “Look at you, Theo!” He says, and the kid just keeps giggling like Eddie is the funniest man alive. “What are we telling your dad?”

It just… slips out.

And Theo doesn’t flinch, not like Eddie does. Instantaneously and violently. Fuck. He really shouldn’t have said that, but Theo doesn’t seem to notice, so he won’t bring it up.

Theo just smiles, a bit mischievously and says “call Buck!”

Eddie sighs. He fucking loves this kid. It’s honestly unfair. “We can’t call Buck, buddy, he’s at work, remember?” He gently reminds him.

Theo seems to think about it, then nods, and then throws himself at Eddie, who is crouched down by the couch, so in two seconds flat, they are both covered in ice cream.

And Eddie is wearing a white tee, but he won’t budge. Not a time for a mental breakdown. He was a soldier. He can survive a mini Buck.

“Theo…”

“Eddie!” Theo delightfully wraps his arms around Eddie’s neck and squeezes and Eddie wants to drop on the floor, precisely lying down, and sob until he’s dying from dehydration.

“Eddie’s got you!” Then he whispers in Eddie’s neck, because Buck is always telling him that, and Eddie’s heart becomes dust in his chest. There’s no way it has not exploded.

“Yeah,” he breathes out, all chocked up and emotional. “I always got you.” And then, when Theo wiggles free, he adds, “now we gotta get you in a bath, bud.”

By the time Buck comes home, Christopher is sound asleep in his room, but Theo seems determined to win his battle against sleep and waits for Buck with only one eye open.

“Hey, Theo, you can sleep, buddy, I’m here,” Buck reassures him, kneeling down next to the little bed.

Theo smiles. Somehow, his smile manages to always carry a spark of something playful and smart, and Buck loves him for that. “Hello,” he sleepily murmurs. Then he turns to Eddie, to look at him for a moment, before succumbing to sleep. “Don’t tell dad, Eddie.”

Eddie remains frozen on the spot, looking at Buck, while Buck looks at Theo like he’s a ticking bomb.