Be planetary

It’s actually so fucking funny that barristers wear those silly wigs on top of their normal hair in the UK. Literally what for

Ok never mind someone just coughed so loud it broke the sound barrier. Back to my regularly scheduled Misery Circus

I love waking up early cuz it’s the only time no one else in the house is up so it’s like The Age of Peace and Quiet (Bloomsbury Publishing, 2026) but now it’s 1pm and i’ve been up for 7 hours now and i’m getting worried that everyone else died or something. Maybe there’s a gas leak and this is how I learn i have a mutant superpower that makes me immune to gas leaks. What if i have to feel really guilty for the rest of my life cuz i was thinking about how Awesome it is to be the only one awake only to realize that everyone else will Never Wake Up Again and i shouldn’t have felt grateful cuz now i’m a Monster….. #normalfear