Bibliophile

In the early morning hours, anonymous in Diyarbakir, Turkey was able to capture a chilling footage of a strange humanoid creature walking down the street. For a minute, the entity walks about aimlessly before it begins levitating up into the air. (Source)

- grabbed me by the shoulder and put his hand over my mouth at 3am and pointed to the wall, whispering “do you see it? the barbed wire.” - woken me up and muttered “he’s here” while staring at my bedroom door - rolled over last night and said “you don’t know what’s out there. You don’t know what’s in the swamp.”

TUFTED DEER

Yes! This cute looking deer vampire exists! It’s scientific name is Elaphodus cephalopus and it’s found in high altitudes in Burma or China. They get their name from the “tuft” of hair they have on their foreheads. In the wild they are browsers and grazers, eating mainly grass or fruit. They are territorial and don’t move that far away from their homes. 

Did I mention how they look like an adorable vampire? Oh I did? Oops. 

So there has been a bit of “what if humans were the weird ones?” going around tumblr at the moment and Earth Day got me thinking. Earth is a wonky place, the axis tilts, the orbit wobbles, and the ground spews molten rock for goodness sakes. What if what makes humans weird is just our capacity to survive? What if all the other life bearing planets are these mild, Mediterranean climates with no seasons, no tectonic plates, and no intense weather? 

Human: “Honestly we can tolerate anywhere from -40 to 50 Celcius, but we prefer the 0 to 30 range.”

Alien: “……. I’m sorry, did you just list temperatures below freezing?”

Human: “Yeah, but most of us prefer to throw on scarves or jackets at those temperatures it can be a bit nippy.” 

Other human: “Nah mate, I knew this guy in college who refused to wear anything past his knees and elbows until it was -20 at least.”

Human: “Heh. Yeah everybody knows someone like that.”

Alien: “……. And did you also say 50 Celcius? As in, half way to boiling?”

Human: “Eugh. Yes. It sucks, we sweat everywhere, and god help you if you touch a seatbelt buckle, but yes.” 

someone: *mentions halloween*

me:

My grandmother would have smacked my teeth out of my head if I had referred to a woman as a fat pig. And I cannot understand how people can clap for that. It’s absolutely collective insanity.

If one of my sons – I am getting furious just thinking about it – if one of my sons said that in a public place, they couldn’t even live in my house anymore.”