Thereās āblack comedyā and then thereās M*A*S*H.

izzy's playlists!

Jules of Nature

@theartofmadeline

Xuebing Du
Sweet Seals For You, Always

JVL
Game of Thrones Daily

romaā
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

Kaledo Art
cherry valley forever
Show & Tell
YOU ARE THE REASON
todays bird
occasionally subtle
sheepfilms
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Malaysia

seen from Saudi Arabia

seen from United States

seen from Türkiye

seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
seen from China

seen from United States
seen from Bangladesh
seen from Bangladesh
seen from United States
seen from South Africa
seen from South Africa
@bridgetmcarthur
Thereās āblack comedyā and then thereās M*A*S*H.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
how to identify "boy" clothes and "girl" clothes
are you a boy? your clothes are boy clothes.
are you a girl? your clothes are girl clothes.
are you outside the binary of boy and girl? so are your clothes.
did someone just tell you your clothes donāt match your gender identity? they are a trashcan and their clothes are trashcan clothes.
Or in the words of Eddie Izzard..Ā
Because this cannot be reblogged enough.
Screaming silently in adoration
US students will be able to shield themselves during school shootings with the latest in body armour, the Bodyguard Blanket
http://goo.gl/WwvECT
Are fucking kidding me? I have been sitting at home and constantly watching the news after the events of yesterday. For those of you who are wondering, I am a junior at REYNOLDS HIGH SCHOOL! I was there when the shooter kept running in the halls trying to open the doors and get in. I was there in the dark praying and crying while my librarian kept saying ā theyāll have to kill me before they touch my kidsā I have known her for three years, her determination to keep us safe broke her heart. Seeing this, that little children need protection in school. Are we sending kids to a battlefield? I have three little brothers ranging from 5-10, and still people have the nerve to speak about the second amendment? Really? I canāt even type anymore. Iām so disgusted and frustrated. When will you realize that itās important to have gun control? When a shooter is pointing a gun at your child? Is that when youāll realize that guns arenāt something to be kept around. People say itās a free country but honesty, this country is more oppressed and diseased than any other country.
Show me ONE instance where gun control and gun free zones prevented school shootings.
Let me tell you guys a story. In 1996, in a little town in Australia called Port Arthur, a gunman killed 35 and injured 23. This place was a tourist attraction, with plenty of visitors and locals going about their business.Ā 35 people died.Thatās 35 marriages, anniversaries, birthdays or uni degrees. 35 people left Port Arthur in body bags. At the time, we had a pretty conservative government, and the Prime Minister at the time (in hindsight) was kind of a dick. But within two weeks of the shooting, Howard instituted a massive reform and buyback of all firearms.Ā
But it must be a statistical flaw, you say, there werenāt that many massacres before 1996, right? No, WRONG.Ā In the eighteen years leading up to Port Arthur, there had been 13 mass shootings.Ā
But April, you ask, this couldnāt possibly have worked could it? Wouldnāt it only have reduced the mass shootings? WRONG. Since 1996, there have been ZERO mass shootings. Thatās right, ZERO. FUCKING ZILCH. There have been scattered homicides, however:
How many schools have been raided and children murdered?Ā NONE. How many film buffs have been murdered in their seats?Ā NONE. How many innocent lives have been lost to the barrel of a gun?Ā NONE.
On top of this, homicides involving the use of guns, and youth suicide involving the use of guns has declined dramatically, by up to 60%
Australia, however much the environment tries to kill you, is a safe haven, and you can walk the streets with 99% assurance that you wonāt fall victim to a drive by shooting.
Your move, America.
in 1987Ā a lone gunman killed 16 people, wounded 15 and then committed suicide. within six months the uk government passed an amendment to the firearms act effectively outlawing all high calibre, high frequency, high capacity rifles and shotguns.
in 1996Ā another lone gunman killed 16 children and their teacher, and then committed suicide. again within six months the uk government outlawedĀ all handguns.Ā special dispensation had to be issued in order to hold shooting competition as part of the 2012 olympic games, and british hopefuls had to train overseas.
you can legally own certain types of shotgun, .22 calibre rifles over a certain barrel length, and antiques. thatās it.
in the nigh-on twenty years since the uk has had one mass shooting.Ā one. and weāre down to about 30 gun-related deaths annually.
there is notĀ one example of gun control laws reducing mass shootings and gun-related homicide. there areĀ dozens. it literally worksĀ every time. the usa is the anomaly not because it didnāt work but because it hasnāt tried.
Earlier today, I served as the āyoung womanās voiceā in a panel of local experts at a Girl Scouts speaking event. One question for the panel was something to the effect of, "Should parents read their daughterās texts or monitor her online activity for bad language and inappropriate content?"
I was surprised when the first panelist answered the question as if it were about cyberbullying. The adult audience nodded sagely as she spoke about the importance of protecting children online.
I reached for the microphone next. I said, āAs far as reading your childās texts or logging into their social media profiles, I would say 99.9% of the time, doĀ notĀ do that.ā
Looks of total shock answered me. I actually saw heads jerk back in surprise. Even some of my fellow panelists blinked.
Everyone stared as I explained that going behind a childās back in such a way severs the bond of trust with the parent. When I said, āThis is the most effective way to ensure that your child never tells you anything,ā it was like Iād delivered a revelation.
Itās easy to talk about the disconnect between the old and the young, but I donāt think Iād ever been so slapped in the face by the reality of it. It was clear that for most of the parents I spoke to, the idea of such actions as a violation had never occurred to them at all.
It alarms me how quickly adults forget that children are people.
Apparently people are rediscovering this post somehow and I think thatās pretty cool! Having experienced similar violations of trust in my youth, this is an important issue to me, so I want to add my personal story:
Around age 13, I tried to express to my mother that I thought I might have clinical depression, and she snapped at me ānot to joke about things like that.ā I stopped telling my mother when I felt depressed.
Around age 15, I caught my mother reading my diary. She confessed that any time she saw me write in my diary, she would sneak into my room and read it, because I only wrote when I was upset. I stopped keeping a diary.
Around age 18, I had an emotional breakdown while on vacation because I didnāt want to go to college. I ended upĀ seeing a therapist for - surprise surprise - depression.
Around age 21, I spoke on this panel with my mother in the audience, and afterwardsĀ I mentioned the diary incident to her with respect to this particular Q&A. Her eyes welled up, and she said, āYou know I read those because I was worried you were depressed and going to hurt yourself, right?ā
TL;DR: When you invade your childās privacy, you communicate three things:
You do not respect their rights as an individual.
You do not trust them to navigate problems or seek help on their own.
You probably havenāt been listening to them.
Information about almost every issueĀ that you think you have to snoop for can probably be obtained by communicating with andĀ listening to your child.
My parents used to tell me I was obligated to tell them things my friends confided in me. I would tell them it was none of their business, to which they would respond āyour business is our business, weāre your parents.ā
They basically thought if I knew or thought or experienced something, then they were entitled to that info. Anything they disagreed with or didnāt like they blamed on my friends and would ground me from the supposed offending influence.
They once confiscated every diary, notebook, and scrap of paper, āto see what I was up to, because I was being secretive.ā To this day I canāt let people read anything, even a grocery list or receipt, without feeling panicky. I have to inspect it first.
Donāt stick your nose in your kids business. If youāve done your job as a parent, they will be able to handle things themselves, and when they canāt they will know they can ask for help.
When I was in my 30s, my mother and my bil decided they didn't like that I was not sharing my life with them. They went in and read all my emails. It took years to recover from that.
Questions
Rules: Just insert your answers to the questions below. Tag at least 10 followers.
āØāØName: Bridget
Nickname: Sissy
Birthday: Jan. 12
Gender: female
Sexuality: Straight
Height: 5ā7ā
Time zone: CDT
What time and date is it there: 5:12 PM, September 7th
Average hours of sleep I get each night: 6 or 7
OTPs: Hermione and Ron.Ā All. THE. Way!!!
The last thing I Googled was: OTP.Ā I had no idea what that meant.Ā Then I had to stop and have a crisis because it made me feel old :(
What I last said to a family member: Was it really hot out there?
One place that makes me happy and why: I don't know if I've found that place yet.Ā
How many blankets I sleep under: 1
Favorite beverage: Diet Coke, Wine, Vodka
The last movie I watched in the cinema was: Guardians of the Galaxy
Three things I canāt live without: family especially my husband, the internet, and books.
A piece of advice for all my followers: Meditate every day.Ā Don't take life to seriously.Ā Believe me, in a blink you'll be 50 and you'll regret wasting time being an idiot.Ā
You have to listen to this song: One and the Same by Gareth Dunlop and Kim Richey
Blogs: Yes, but I'm lazy and don't keep up, so I'm not listing them.Ā
miss-apple-pie

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
Books
Book meme rules:
ā10+ books that have stayed with you in some way. Donāt take but a few minutes, and donāt think too hardāthey donāt have to be the ārightā or āgreatā works, just the ones that have touched youā
Tagged by speakingofapplepie
1)Ā The Blessing Stone by Barbara Wood.Ā Ā At the end of the day we are all connected.Ā Ā I also loved how Barbara showed the evolution of beliefs.Ā The woman who saves her group eventually becomes a goddess woman pray to.Ā 2)Ā Lamb by Christopher Moore.Ā Ā This book is fall on the floor funny.Ā Ā It is also touching.Ā Ā Biff is real....he just has to be, 3)Ā Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell.Ā My mom's friend gave me a copy of this book for Christmas when I was 8.Ā I devoured it.Ā It remains my number one favorite.Ā I named my daughter after Scarlett.Ā 4) The Chronicles of Narnia by C. S. Lewis.Ā I first read this series when I was 6.Ā I was transported to Narnia.Ā I wanted to be Lucy!Ā This series started my life long love affair with fantasy.Ā 5)Ā Harry Potter by J. K. Rowling.Ā I read the first three books before I even shared them with my daughter.Ā The books were just starting to get some minor buzz.Ā I spent many wonderful years loving the books, movies, and the release parties.Ā Katie and I took some wonderful memories from that time.Ā 6)Ā The Host by Stephanie Meyer.Ā When I closed the book after the last page was read, I was so sad.Ā I didn't want it to end. The love story is wonderful.Ā But my favorite part is the friendship of the host and the alien.Ā 7)Ā The Divine Circle of Ladies by Dolores Stewart Ricco.Ā I love these ladies.Ā They form a Wiccan circle and use their gifts to solve murders.Ā I love their adventures.Ā 8)Ā Skinny Bitch by Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin.Ā The bitches opened my eyes to what happens to the animals we eat.Ā I became a vegetarian.Ā 9)Ā Moloka'i by Alan Brennert.Ā This is the story of a leper colony in Hawaii.Ā It is a sweeping gut wrenching story that will cut you to the quick.Ā But it is SO worth the read.Ā Just don't finish it in a public place.Ā 10)Ā Still Alice by Lisa Genova.Ā A book about Alzheimer's from the perspective of the one with the disease.Ā I tag
kamichaos7; http://skwrel.tumblr.com/; rdustinc
I will miss you
(source)
Faith in humanity restored! Never judge a book by its cover!Ā
Iām actually sobbing
Seen this before. Sobād the first time. Doing it again.
Bless them.. I like bikers even more now.
This is so cute
Where is the funding for them? Why have I not heard of this before? Talk about unsung heroes
this is amazing

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
Did you seriously name your child after a character from the Hunger Games? It doesnāt surprise me that youāre 16
You realize this has been used as a name for hundreds of years right?
It is also a fucking flower you crusty tits. Why does it matter what, where or who a parent names their child after? I canāt stand this stupidity. Seriously.
If Evie had been a boy the name we were going to used was Castiel Everette from Supernatural and Doctor Who.
Riven is named after a book and video game character, and Primrose is a name my little sister wants to use if she ever has a daughter. I mean, Primrose is better than Pilot Inspektor right? (Some famous dude named his kid that).
Benjamin Tiberius are names from Star Trek captains. Lol. (Cap. Benjamin Sisko from DS9 and Cap. James Tiberius obvsly) Names come from somewhere that means something to you. Who cares what a childās name is. Is it your child? No? Then kindly fuck off c:
Ramona wasnāt specifically named after her, but thereās Ramona Flowers from Scott Pilgrim. Seriously, who cares though. Primrose is a nice name.
I named my kids after a rock star and a song name, so Iām right up there with you, lmao.
I really like the book Coraline š asshats!!
Thalia is a Greek goddess, character in several books, and I hear that thereās a singer named that as well. Who cares? Also, Thalia has a cousin named Tiberius. Get over iiit
My youngest is Levi Adams after the character Levi (who is called Biff) in Christopher Mooreās Lamb, and Adams is after Douglas Adams.
I despise people who bully someone over what they named their kid. Unless the kid's name is toilet bowl cleaner or Satan's minion....STFU!
Fuck this. Fuck that.
ViaĀ The Internets
well this is rEALLY CUTE.
ITāS THE CUTEST THING IāVE EVER SEEN.
I have reblogged this at least 5 times and I donāt care
bananena! I saw your one post, or maybe it was an answer to an ask, but either way, you said you need a constant reminder of this. So I put it on a picture of a mushroom because you like those. ā¤ļø
Exhaustion
My limbs are tired, My bones are tired, My eyes are tired, My voice is tired, My joints are tired, My mind is tired, My skin is tired, My hope is tired, My nerves are tired, My muscles are tired, My organs are tired, My emotions are tired, My soul is tired
I am tired, more than tired, and more than you could imagine.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
Have you ever been to earth?
On earth, we use the word āburritoā to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and Iām surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:
Youāre an idiot.
Let me further explain:
Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burritoās end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise.Ā That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a cilantro cavern.
Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.
When you eat a burrito, you donāt stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans canāt usually dislocate their jaws, and Iām not a fucking pelican. But you must think thatās how itās done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.
And guess what else, player? You probably canāt guessĀ anything, because Iām pretty sure youāre just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, hereās what:
Humans also donāt eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS IāLL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.
Nope.
My experience was more like HEY BEANS ITāS JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG IāM IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE ITāS NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.
You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.
And donāt even fucking think Iām about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THATāS HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THATāS BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.
Whatās that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DONāT WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DONāT WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.
I just want a burrito.
In conclusion:
Youāre the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.
UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID āJUST EAT IT WITH A FORKā:
A fuckingĀ fork?
I DIDNāT ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.
If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.
Thatās like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKERāS GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.
Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. Theyāre called fucking HANDS.
A fork. My god. I havenāt cried since I was six, but Iām fucking sobbing now.
People eat burritos with forks?
God is sorry he made us.
(Source)
Oh my God.