Word Vomit.

Chapter Three: "Make Me Over" I knew that this reality show situation was a bad idea. I mean, I literally saw all of this happening, but I just really wanted to take the chance. Though so many people told me their concerns about the idea, I wanted to go against my gut. Maybe I should never, ever let that happen again. As I'm riding in the back of this black town car, I get a phone call from Laura. "Hello? Brian!? Bitch, say something!!", she screamed. "Well, damn. Are you gonna give me a second to respond?", I rebut. "Look, I just heard about this whole situation and I just knew I needed to see what the hell was going on...are you good?", she asks. "I'm good, I'm just a little...whatever, I'm good. I'm pulling up to my loft now.", I answered. "Okay, well I'm just making it back to New York too, so just let me know when you get settled, I'm bringing over wine & take out. We need to talk about some things.", she said. "That would be amazing....", then I paused. "Laura, let me hit you right back." I look up at my building, and there he's standing. Waiting there, with four dozens of flowers, two red, two white. Taylor knows I love flowers, so this only meant one of two things. 1. He's still showing me how sorry he is for this shit show we still haven't quite resolved, or 2. Shit has gotten even more real. I get out the town car, and head to the door of my building. Before I could open the door, he stops me, hands me the flowers and starts grabbing my luggage. "I missed you, babe.", Taylor says. "I missed you too...why are you here though? Don't you have in a game a couple hours?", I asked. "Don't worry about that...I'm not. I'm worried about you.", he responds. "Taylor, you're the best shooter on your team. You know they're gonna be looking for you.", I said. Then he pulled me in and began kissing me. I pulled away from him. "Something's wrong..." "Why do you say that?", he asked. "Taylor, c'mon...the flowers, the passionate kissing...something's up." I answered. He looked at me and deeply inhaled and then exhaled. He put his head down...and then looked back up at me. Then a single tear dropped. "It's mine...", he answered. "Hmph...it is, huh? How you feel about that?", I asked him. "I don't know...I know I'm not ready. I'm scared, B. Scared to be a dad...scared to lose you...I'm scared.", he responded. At this point all I could was accept it. I mean, there's not too much I can say about the situation. On the inside, I'm hurt, I want to strangle him...on the outside, I'm over it. I'm over him. We're not married & I'm not stupid. I've been cheated on before, but never like this. I'm not sure if I can do this with him anymore, knowing everything that I know. & yes, he came out on national television, but I feel like all of this should've been taken into consideration before he decided to get a girl pregnant. I gave him the flowers back. "I can't do this, Taylor." "Babe, don't do this...please don't. C'mon babe.", he responded. "You know why I can't do this...you lied to me, about something you cannot lie about. I'm tired of people stealing my heart and then lying. First my parents, then my exes...ALL of my exes, and now you...my next ex. I guess you guys had something in common after all, huh?", I rebutted. I grabbed the rest of my luggage, and began up the stairs the lead to the front door of my loft. As I'm opening the door, he grabs my arm. "Let me go, Taylor. Just let me go.", I tell him. "I'm coming back after my game. Let me make it up to you. Please?", he says as he's crying. "Taylor, I'm hurt...I'm not sure you should do that.", I tell him. "Why? You got somebody coming here. I'll break his fucking jaw!", he says, while looking around as if he's looking for someone. Then I hear heels walking up... "Oh, it's you...what's up baby daddy?", Laura says, carrying her Chanel backpack as she directs two delivery guys into the loft, carrying in the Chinese take-out & two bottles of Moët & Chandon. Yes, she's that extra. "Laura, don't start, he was just leaving.", I tell her. "See, what I don't seem to understand is..." as she is stepping in front of me. "Why are you even here, pleading your case? Taylor, you've got to be shitting me to tell me you knew nothing about this baby at all. It doesn't add up!", Laura screams. I pull her out of the way and into the loft. "You know what, I'm good. Brian, I'm calling you later. Pick up. I mean it, babe.", Taylor says as he reaches in the kiss me on the cheek. Something inside of me told me to turn away from his kiss. I didn't want it under these circumstances. Not like this. I rejected it. "Goodbye, Taylor. Had a good game.", I tell him. "Alright. I love you, Brian.", he responds. I fell silent. I knew then that this would never be the same between us. I mean, you can't blame me. I'm sure you maybe out there reading this, judging me...but that's NOT what's important right now. Let's just see if you'd be okay with your boyfriend having a baby by someone else, two years into your relationship after he publicly make sit official between you two, and you find out about it all ON NATIONAL TELEVISION! Yeah...I thought so. I just looked at him, walked further into the loft, and just closed the door. Now, in any other circumstance, this would be rude as hell. But I'm just aggravated. Taylor made a conscious choice and this was the result of it. I closed the door, and immediately burst out in tears. I've been trying hard to deal with this the best way possible, but now that I'm home, I'm gonna cry because I can. Laura came rushing to me, and covered me in her embrace. "Everything will be fine, love. I hate him for doing this to you.", she says. I wiped my eyes and looked into hers. "Laura, what the hell am I'm gonna do?", I ask. "You need a do over, with a new guy...AFTER you get over him. I can't stand a bitch who brings in old feelings to new situations. Nobody has the time.", she answered. Is this the time where I use the whole, "To get over one man, you have to get under another..." statement, but I'm over men right now. Laura's right. I need a do over. All of a sudden, I get a text from Austin. "Guy put all of my things on the street and changed the locks to the Malibu home." Can this day get anymore worst?