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(Modified from a very well thought out post by @m4mdiscipline. Most of the credit is his. My modifications were to remove whatever i disagreed with, add in some thoughts of my own, improve formatting and readability, and correct mistakes)

1. Get into his head

Learn his fantasies and what turns him on. Use this information to your advantage.

Find out what humiliates him, and to what level.

Make him show his loyalty to you regularly. Reward him when he does, even if it’s just with praise.

Aside from family, close friends, and work, give him minimal privacy. Don’t hide this process from him. Make him partake in handing it over to you in ways that demonstrate how he is “losing the privacy.”

2. Punish him for infractions, no exceptions!

Don’t let him get away with anything! When you let your sub get away with something, you are telling him that you don’t care for him and that what he did was ok.

You can spank, paddle, or whip him.

Humiliate him past what is easy for him.

Corner meditation time

Food restrictions

Write a short essay explaining why his behavior was wrong, or a report on some reading you assigned.

Ground him/take away privileges.

Make him do something he hates.

Get creative and make the punishment match the crime.

Never use separation or the threat of leaving/ending your control over him as a punishment. That is counterproductive to the end goal (trust and service) and is detrimental to the faggot.

3. Routinely discipline him. This is different than punishment.

Spank him at least once a week, just because you can. Not too hard, not too soft. For lots of subs, some pain can really help elevate their mode for the rest of the day or longer.

Humiliate him often.

Five to ten minutes of corner time can do wonders, to promote meditation.

Routine discipline will save you time and energy in the long run. You will have to punish him less as a result.

Taking care of you is an essential of his discipline. Have him do your laundry, cleaning, etc.

4. On some level, even if it’s small, keep your sub horny for you.

Talk sexy to him.

Sexualize nonsexual things or activities you are interested in. He will see whatever it is you’ve sexualized as such and be more interested and eager to engage.

Have your sub do some or all of your body grooming. This can be your bath, shower, nails, shaving, trimming, etc.

Tell him when and what you’re going to do to him in the near future.

Send him text messages with orders to do something sexual.

Make him give you orgasms. This is different from sex. This is a service.

Let him rest on you to smell you as you watch TV or read.

Give him underwear/items of yours to smell as he sleeps.

5. Control your own feelings of guilt.

When it comes to your control over your sub, be firm!

Some toughness will be needed from time to time to help break your sub down.

Your sub may not want everything you give him or do to him, but he needs it.

Letting your sub get away with insubordinate behavior because you feel guilty adequately addressing it is weak.

Sub faggots need a real man who is close to them to guide them. Sometimes real men need to show the fag that he is inferior. This can’t always be done by talking. And if it is done my talking, the talking can’t be politically correct/kind.

Humiliation/breaking him down, teaching him to serve long term, these are all things he needs. You are filling his needs.

Remember, you both need to be happy. But happiness comes from different places for different people. Where there is good communication, and your sub has communicated that he needs this life to be happy, then you are doing him a service and loving him by breaking him down and controlling him.

A good sub is hard to find. Don’t let the guilt of giving him what he needs stop you from doing so. What he needs may be overwhelming for him and he may break. If he does, be there for him.

6. Humiliate/degrade/break him down on some level daily, some days more than others.

Have him wear a butt-plug, perhaps Wi-Fi enabled, or with a hollow rattling core, or with a dangling bell.

Have him be naked or nearly so, around you and or your friends.

Make him wear a collar or other symbol of inferiority.

If he has trouble keeping his hands off his penis without permission, make him wear a chastity device.

Teach him commands or hand signals such as “drop to your knees,” “kiss my crotch,” etc. In public or with friends randomly call out a trick every now then. Make sure your sub does this flawlessly without hesitation.

Make him masturbate for you.

Slap him in the face.

Spit on him.

Treat him as an inferior in public, such as by carrying bags, opening doors, etc.

Make him eat his own cum sometimes.

Talk down to him in front of others.

7. Rearrange his life/time to better serve/please you. Make sure this does not interfere with his time with loved ones or work.

If you want to change his body to your liking, do so. Control his workouts, diet etc. Make sure to be realistic with this one.

Make sure he is available during some of your leisure time each week so he will be able to serve you during those times.

Put him on a sleeping schedule. Lots of fags are unable to adequately manage their sleep times. The better rested he is, the better he will serve you.

Go through his closet or dresser and set aside any clothing you don’t like him to be wearing.

Sign him up to learn new tasks or perfect tasks/skills that will help you, such as massage classes, cooking classes, pet care, etc.

Change his grooming habits to your liking.

8. Help your sub be grateful for everything he has. Make sure you are at the top of that list. One great way to do this is to deny him things. Yep, it’s time to say “No.” Subs need boundaries and saying “No” is a great way to help them with those boundaries.

You can take away certain foods, comforts, leisure time, sex, masturbation, etc.

Make him show his gratitude to you often. Faggots will show this to you in their own way. Most faggots will need some help/instruction on exactly how to show their gratitude to you.

Make him explain why he deserves something. If he can’t explain, take it from him.

You can take things/items from him that you know he does not need but likes. A caution here: Make sure he can afford for you to take them, and that they are not of sentimental value. Let him know from time to time that you enjoy something that you took from him.

Offer him a reward of getting to have something back. Make what you give him back relevant to what you make him do. 

9. None of these actions will work without real trust.

If your sub is your partner, let him know how much his sub-ass completes you and your power.

If your sub is not your partner, make sure you are real friends. Let him know you appreciate how his inferiority completes you. The more you two know about and do with each other, the more thoroughly you can control him.

Part of trust on the sub’s part is knowing you will follow through when you say you are going to do something to him or for him or are going to make him do something.  Follow through always.

 When a sub fully trusts you, he can submit to you his mind and privacy. Letting you go in and rearrange/manage his life.

Subs need constant reassurance. Let him know that no matter what, he is yours. If a serious sub feels disposable, he will look for another Dom who appreciates his surrender.

If your life is getting too hard for a bit or you need help with something, trust that your sub will be able to take over for you and act in your best interest until you are back in shape. Giving a sub this responsibility will either make him feel trusted and good, or upset that you are not actively controlling him 100% of the time. If he gets upset and does not step up and take over for you, he is not a right match for you.

Talk to your sub often. Ask him how he is feeling. Let him honestly know how you are feeling on anything and everything.

By taking things away from him, you are in a sense rewarding him when you give them back. Also, nothing he has is his forever. You need to retake things and privileges away from him periodically so he knows they are a privilege and not a right. Think of it like taking a food bowl away from a dog. Your sub needs to be docile enough that you can take his food away from him as he is eating. He will not make a fuss and will patiently wait until the food is returned.

Consensual Non-Consent (CNC) is one of the most complex, intense, and profound expressions of power exchange within BDSM. It is not simply an act or a kink - it is an entire philosophy of surrender, a structured dynamic that removes the traditional boundaries of negotiated consent and replaces them with absolute authority and control.

For those who live it, CNC is not about fleeting encounters or carefully constructed scenes; it is a way of being, a psychological and emotional state of submission that extends beyond play into reality. In its truest form, CNC is about removing the illusion of choice, relinquishing personal agency, and entering a space where one’s autonomy is not merely limited, but completely overwritten by another’s will.

Defining Consensual Non-Consent

At its core, CNC is the intentional and consensual surrender of the right to say "no." It is the relinquishment of control so absolute that consent is given once and for all, rather than on a case-by-case basis.

Unlike traditional BDSM, where consent is typically ongoing and renegotiated, CNC creates a space where the submissive no longer holds power over the dynamic. Instead, they enter a state where their body, mind, and choices are dictated by another, without the expectation of further discussion or permission.

This is not pretend non-consent. It is not about acting out fantasies of resistance while secretly controlling the outcome. True CNC is the surrender of resistance itself, until submission is not merely expected, but instinctual.

The Psychology of CNC: Why It Works

For many, CNC is a deeply psychological experience. It taps into primal desires, psychological conditioning, and identity restructuring that go far beyond simple dominance and submission.

1. The Illusion of Choice vs. the Security of Control

Many submissives describe CNC as an experience of profound liberation - not from responsibility, but from the burden of choice. In a world where autonomy is expected and decisions are constant, the ability to hand over control completely can be deeply freeing.

No need to decide. Master decides.

No need to hesitate. Hesitation is eliminated.

No need to question. There is only obedience.

2. The Conditioning of True Submission

In a CNC dynamic, obedience is not a decision; it is an inevitability. Through psychological and behavioural conditioning, the submissive is trained to respond to commands without hesitation, without doubt, without even the impulse to resist.

Operant Conditioning: Rewards and punishments reshape behaviour. Over time, obedience becomes instinctive.

Cognitive Reframing: The submissive learns to associate pleasure, purpose, and fulfilment with surrender.

Dismantling of Autonomy: The submissive’s ability to make independent choices is gradually eroded, leaving only pure, unquestioning servitude.

The end result is a state where submission is not merely an act, but an identity. The submissive does not simply "choose" to obey - they exist to be controlled.

CNC in Practice: Power Beyond Negotiation

While CNC is deeply psychological, it is also highly structured. It is not a chaotic loss of control; it is the systematic restructuring of control into an organised, functioning dynamic where the submissive’s role is permanently and irrevocably defined.

1. The Elimination of Safe Words

Traditional BDSM relies on safe words as a safeguard against going too far. In a true CNC dynamic, however, there are no safe words—because there is no "too far."

This does not mean reckless or irresponsible behaviour. It means that the boundaries of consent have already been established at the beginning, and from that point forward, control is absolute.

2. The Role of Force and Resistance

While some CNC dynamics involve physical force, it is not necessary. The true power of CNC lies in the erasure of resistance altogether. The submissive is not simply overpowered; they are trained not to resist in the first place.

If Master wishes to use them, they are used.

If Master wishes to hurt them, they are hurt.

If Master wishes to take, they take—because they have the right to, without permission, without question.

For the submissive, this is not about enduring suffering—it is about accepting their place, embracing their purpose, and finding fulfilment in absolute surrender.

3. Ownership Beyond Role-Playing

In CNC, the submissive is not a player in a scene; they are property in reality. Their body, their pleasure, their suffering - it all belongs to the one who owns them. This means:

They do not set the terms of their use.

They do not dictate what is done to them.

They do not have the right to revoke consent—because they gave it away completely.

This is not a fantasy. It is a lived reality, where the submissive no longer belongs to themselves in any way.

The Sensuality of Total Control

There is an undeniable sensuality in CNC; not just in the acts themselves, but in the deep psychological connection it creates.

The thrill of knowing you are powerless.

The heat of being used without permission.

The ache of being taken, pushed, disciplined, and controlled.

The addictive pleasure of surrender so complete, it consumes you.

For both Dominant and submissive, CNC is not just about actions - it is about who they are.

For the Dominant: The intoxicating power of true ownership. No negotiations. No limitations. Just raw, undeniable control.

For the submissive: The bliss of being nothing but a vessel for their Dominant’s will. No autonomy. No hesitation. Just absolute surrender.

This is not roleplay. It is not a game. It is the most profound state of ownership and submission that can exist.

The Intersection of CNC and Satanism

For those who follow the path of Satanism, CNC takes on an even deeper meaning. Satan is the Lord of indulgence, power, and breaking the chains of false morality. True Satanic devotion is about power...taken, not given.

A Master in a CNC dynamic embodies that power, not asking, but taking. The submissive, in turn, embraces the beauty of being completely ruled, utterly owned, totally reshaped into the image of their Master’s desires.

In this, CNC is not just submission; it is a Satanic act of defiance against the weak, the mundane, the enslaving morality of those who fear power and control. To embrace CNC is to embrace the raw, unfiltered truth of dominance and submission in its most absolute form.

The Truth of CNC

CNC is not for the uncertain, not for the faint-hearted, not for those who cling to illusion. It is the purest, most demanding form of submission; one that requires a level of trust, devotion, and surrender that few can truly comprehend.

For those who live it, CNC is not just about control - it is about identity, purpose, and power in its most primal and profound form.

To be taken, owned, used, and shaped into nothing but an extension of another’s will...this is the pinnacle of submission.