ollies outie

every day i get closer to pooping in the shower just to see what happens

i am but a discarded pokemon card, left in the dirt, not even a good one, like one of those old diglett with 40hp

i run on spite and sprite no more no less

admitting to yourself that you need therapy is a big thing. admitting that you need therapy because of your mother is another thing. thinking/telling your mother that she needs therapy because of HER mother is a WHOLE other thing.

i think, spiritually, i’m 87% deadpool,

the nuggets, craig. they’re crispie.

TFW YOURE DRUNK ON A THURSDAY AND YOU HATE GASTON

ash ketchum singlehandedly would have caused the fall of Troy

i’m a kirby main first and a human second

eenie meenie miney moe, bless this tiger by his toe,

you’re not allowed to be mad if it’s your fault in the first place :)))))))))