𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐬.

DYLAN O'BRIEN Men's Health

QUEEN CHARLOTTE: A BRIDGERTON STORY (2023—) 01×06 : “Crown Jewels”

[ QUARANTINE ]: the sender and receiver, both being sick, decide to quarantine together and spend the recovery period with each other.

doesn’t know much about what was said between the pair, but since they’ve joined back in with the rest of the group, he can tell that something’s just off. it’s not like they’ve particularly gotten along, or ever really interacted with one another unless forced to, but the fact that neither one can meet his eye tells him all that he needs to know. there’s a hundred and one scenarios that shift through his head, and somehow being on the outskirts of it, and not knowing, has his anxiety skyrocketing. tries to play it as cool as he can, like the ability to remain calm and collected is an ability that comes easy to him, when in reality, he can’t quite keep still, always shifting his weight, in some way, or rubbing at tired eyes, scratching at the underside of his jaw. gets snippets of eden’s mood— that’s she’s obviously not happy about what was said, and that’s only confirmed when she insists that they’ll talk about it later when he makes an attempt to ask about it. it isn’t until everyone’s packing up for the night, downing the last of their drinks and retreating to their rooms, that he makes an effort to try again, but this time with devon. he approaches her in the kitchen, taking the spot beside her to help with the dishes, towel in hand to start drying what she washes. such a mundane task, but one that comes with a flood of memories— a life like this, that they once shared together. a life that he had to say goodbye to all too soon; one that he always thought they’d have together. “ everything’s alright, yeah? ” the question is phrased simple, easy. but he knows the complication that’s tied within it. “ like, you’re okay, i mean? feel like you haven’t been able to look at me, all night long, ” pauses, then, vulnerability on show for a second. “ did she say something to you? ”

devon didn’t quite know how to act, after a conversation like that. it’s obvious that eden felt threatened, that she wanted devon to believe that there was no chance of a reconciliation between her and miller, that he didn’t want her, any longer. it’s hard to believe that’s true, though, with how they were just minutes prior to the other’s appearance at the door— hands trailing along each other’s skin, all whispered words and heated looks. still, it's confusing, and she’s not immune from worrying about what people thought, now realizing that they weren’t really as discreet with all of it as they believed. if eden noticed how they looked at each other, then that means everyone could. that’s why she averted her gaze from him for the remainder of the night, haunted by the other’s words. fletcher hadn’t said anything yet, but he didn’t have to— she already knew how he felt about her and miller’s relationship. still, that might be why she’s stalling, choosing to do the dishes instead of potentially engaging in another confrontation. and she doesn’t mind it when miller joins her, at least not initially, focusing on the task at hand, on how this used to be a normal, almost every night occurrence for them. it’s only when his vulnerability filters out that her actions pause, unsure how to answer any of his questions. was everything alright ? not really. “ what, she hasn’t told you ? ” it really wasn’t her place to say anything, she thinks, but it’s miller. she couldn’t hide anything from him, anyway. “ she’s noticed, you know. how we look at each other, i mean, ” she pauses to let out a sigh, leaning against the sink as her head hangs low, deciding to steal one glimpse of him before tucking it back down. “ pretty sure if i looked at you again tonight, she’d pull out that guillotine you mentioned before. ” now wasn’t the time to reminisce, however. “ and she said there’s no way you would ever choose to be with me, again. didn’t work out the first time, so why try again ? ” tries to laugh it off, then, to feign like it didn’t hurt, but it did. “ she really doesn’t like me, or just… us, being around each other. ”

she expects deflection. is waiting for it with each second that passes, while the initial shock of the confrontation wears off. trust her when she says she doesn’t want to be having this conversation either, but something needs to be said— surely neither of them think this could continue in the way it has been, right under her nose? so, yes, she anticipates there will be some form of divergence, but this just makes her blood boil. hopes her countenance doesn’t give her away, that her face isn’t growing hot, like she feels it is. at least they can’t look at each other, her own gaze travelling beyond the other female, to the view beyond glass doors. “ i didn’t say anything about playing a game. ” but eden’s good at that, isn’t she? planting seeds of doubt without needing to say much at all. she’ll allow the other to think that, however, like maybe it’ll act as enough to have her think differently about how they all move forward, from here. she, for one, refuses to continue turning a blind eye to what was happening right in front of her— clearly unfinished business. has ignored it for as long as she can; let them sneak off into unoccupied rooms, text at all hours throughout the night, call each other when their days were rough. isn’t outright opposed to them being cordial, but as close as they are, as they act… it was weird, wasn’t it? was she the only one who saw through it? “ right, and fletcher, ” she adds quickly, again, a reminder that there was a fourth party tangled up in their mess; one she was certain was catching onto… whatever it is they’re trying to do here, hiding from them. that’s the part she still hasn’t figured out, and she hates them for it. “ i get it, though. you have history, ” and i can’t compete with that. head shakes then, ignoring the sinking feeling in her gut. she’d heard the same from him, too. “ it’s just… you chose to let him go, right? ” poses the question, intentions not as pure as the way it initially comes out. “ i’m not trying to sabotage either, but i just don’t see an ending in this where he’s going to choose you, again. ”

is it just her, or did this feel impossible ? not only was she battling her own guilt, forced to engage with the other when she can’t stop replaying what happened between her and miller not all that long ago, but she’s beginning to feel like this entire conversation was calculated. like eden wanted to sow doubt, to knock her off her balance, somehow. and even though she’s not outright saying it, devon can tell that she suspects something, or at least, she’s noticed just how close they are again, and she doesn’t like it. this would be so much easier if she just said that, though. well, maybe not easier, but she would at least feel less… on edge. cheeks flush slightly at the mention of fletcher, embarrassed that she forgot to mention him. god, even if she isn’t purposefully trying to be cruel, she’s beginning to think that maybe she is, anyway. can’t ponder that for long, though, as eden’s words strike her square in the jaw. she could make it sound as innocent as she wanted, but she didn’t believe the act for a second. she could claim she wasn’t trying to sabotage, or play a game, but devon’s not stupid— that’s exactly what she’s doing. and she doesn’t want it to work, and it isn’t, for the most part, but there’s a tiny piece of her that she knows will cling to it, certain that she’ll spiral about it later when she’s staring up at the ceiling. what if she’s right— what if that wasn’t their ending ? no, it couldn’t be. “ i… well, no, it’s not really that simple, ” she defends, eyes narrowed. “ i did what i thought was the right thing, at the time. i just… wanted him to be happy. ” a cliché, but it was true. does she wish things were different now ? of course, but there was no going back. and part of her knows, now, that she possesses knowledge that could shatter eden’s view of this in an instant by repeating the words he said to her, not all that long ago— that he would leave her, if devon asked him to. if she was cruel, like she suggested earlier, that’s exactly what she would say. instead, she tries to tamper down the smirk that threatens to tug at her lips, looking at the other intently. “ what makes you say that, hm ? ” — “ just say it, eden. stop bullshitting me and tell me how you really feel, for once. ”

hates that it feels like she’s just walked in on them— that she’s the one who has interrupted something, when they both isolated themselves away from the rest of the group, retreating to a space only the two of them occupied. this isn’t the first time she’s experienced this, isn’t the first time that sense of dread has taken over her frame, when she’s realised that neither party were to be seen, convincing herself, in those weaker moments, that they were doing something they shouldn’t be, despite her lack of substance and proof. it’s a simmering rage coiling inside her, now, a kettle about to reach its boiling point. tampers it down as much as she can— to play it cool and calm, even if that’s the last thing she is right now. truth is, eden craves control, and that’s a concept that’s slipping further from her grasp by the second. still, she wears a smile at her lips, at least until miller’s departure, the pretence faltering once it’s just the two of them that remain. how the hell was she going to do this? “ i know we have no reason to be the best of friends… ” she begins, slight edge to her voice. even without the given circumstances, she doesn’t think they’d ever be the type to gravitate to one another. they were just so… different. “ and i promise i’m not trying to be the crazy girlfriend that controls how you spend your time together, ” except, that’s exactly how she’s been feeling. “ it’s just… cruel, don’t you think? allowing him to have hope for something that isn’t going to happen again? ” doesn’t allow her own insecurities rise to the surface, despite how they swim just below it. “ because i’m not stupid, you know? i see the way you look at him, and how he looks at you— don’t think i’m the only one who notices it, either, ” head shakes, referring to the other involved. “ it didn’t work out the first time, and i think we all know it won’t work again. so why hold on? ”

the pit in devon’s stomach feels heavier, now, as she watches eden’s pretense fall away once they’re completely alone. no one wants to be alone in a room with their ex’s current partner, but especially not if they’re still hopelessly in love with said ex, like she was. and there’s an incredible amount of guilt, too, finding it difficult to look her directly in the eye as she thinks about how miller’s hands were just pressed against her skin, how she would’ve done anything he asked of her, in that moment. that’s why it was dangerous for them to get so close— all rationality fell away, and they forgot about the people they would hurt. now that she’s face to face with it, hearing the edge to the other’s voice, devon wishes she could just melt into the floor and escape it all. brows furrow slightly at her words, at her mention of cruelty— that’s not how she saw any of this. then again, she still hasn’t quite figured out what’s happening between them, what the future might hold, just that that spark had never actually extinguished. and apparently, other people could see it, too, judging by the other’s observation, that she noticed how they look at one another. fuck, that’s not good. she thought they were being discreet, but apparently not. guilt slaps her right in the face, teeth chewing on the inside of her cheek. so why hold on ? she lets out a quiet sigh at that question, certain that she didn’t want her to say that she held on because she loved him, because he was all she thought about, that she still believed they were soulmates, in the end. tries not to take offense at her repeated insistence that their relationship wouldn’t work, that everyone thought so, too, but she’d be lying if she said it didn’t affect her at all. “ that’s not… i mean i’m not, like, just playing some kind of game with him, if that’s what you’re saying, ” at least, that’s not her intent, and she hopes he knows that, too. “ and i’m not trying to sabotage anything, or— ” she pauses, to let out another sigh. she owed her some kind of honesty, as she’s never been able to share her side of all of it. “ look, with miller and i… there’s always going to be something between us. i mean, we were together so long, i never thought we would— ” break up, she thinks, but she should probably save it. “ think we can agree he’s just… really special. it’s hard to not imagine him in my life, somehow, i guess, but i’m really not trying to be cruel. not to you or him. ”