blondie84nl

I completed some major changes to the Library For Kinksters. Here is the update…

Aftercare

Aftercare 101

Aftercare For Dominants

Coping With Emotional Subdrop

Dom Drop

How To Make A Sub Drop Kit

Online Aftercare

sub/Dom Space, sub/Dom Drop and Aftercare

Subdrop and Aftercare

Subspace and Aftercare

Consent

Consent & BDSM

Guide to Consent

Doms, Daddies & Masters

7 Fundamental Characteristics of A Daddy Dom

12 Characteristics Of An Ideal Submissive

25 Things Daddies Should Do For Their Littles

30 Rules For A Modern Gentleman

45 Things A Girl Wants, But Won’t Ask For

50 Rules for Daddies

100 Sweet Things You Can Do For Your Princess

101 Things To Do To Make Your Slave Feel Owned (loved)

Alternative Names For “Daddy”

Alternative Domme Titles

Aspects Of Control

Asserting Ownership - Rules

Daddy Up!

Defining A Daddy Dom

Dominants Need Training Also

Fun Tasks Daddies Can Give Their Littles

Help For New Doms

How (and Why) To Go Down On Your Submissive

How To Be A Good Dominant

How to Find a Submissive

Knowing when to be a Dom and when to be her Man

New to DDLG - A Daddy Dom

Observations On Doms By A Submissive

So you want to be a Dom?

So Your Girlfriend Wants You To Dominate her

Some Little Rules All Daddies Should Know

The Dom Commandments

Things for Daddies to Keep in Mind

What Being A Dom Is About - A Submissive’s Perspective

What does the title Daddy mean?

What is a Daddy Dom?

What is a Daddy Dom Mentor?

What It Means To Be A Dominant

What Makes A Good Dominant

Littles, Subs & Slaves

6 Questions Every Submissive Needs To Ask Her Potential Dominant

7 Common Types of Submissives

10 Tips For Living With A Sadist

10 Things A Dominant Needs From A Submissive

11 Red Flags Of An Abusive Dominant

26 Baby Girl Jobs

50 Things You Can Do For Your Daddy

A Bottom’s Responsibility

A Dominant’s Advice To His Submissive

A Man Who Knows You…

A Good Dom vs. A Bad Dom

Acid Test For Subs

Ask A Million And One Questions

Attraction to DD/lg: A Little’s Perspective

Baby girl or little? A brief introduction

Care and feeding of Daddies

Characteristics Of A Good Daddy

Coaxing The Daddy Dom Out Of Your Partner

Feminist Submissive

Finding Your Dominant

Good Rules For Middles and Littles To Live By

Guide For Young Newbie Sub Girls

How a Dom Behaves Shows How He Will Behave Towards You.

“How do I find Daddy?” A guide to help you safely find the Daddy you’re looking for.

How Does A Submissive Ask for Something from Their Dominant?

How To Find A Dom

How to Take Proper Care of Your Dom

I Solemnly Swear I Will Not Do This To Daddy

Novice Submissives

Physical abuse of littles - it is never OK

Signs Of A Fake ‘Dominant’

Stuff no one tells you about submission, until the spreader bar is on and you are trapped.

Submissives, Learning to Trust Your Instincts

Submissive Pride

Submissive Traits - Intelligence

Things My Dream Daddy Would Say To Me

What is a Little?

When newbie subs, with asinine “doms,” need to run away.

Why I call him Daddy

Your Rights As A Submissive

Long Distance Relationships

10 Ways To Survive A Long Distance Relationship

Getting The Most Out Of A Long Distance Relationship

How To Make Long Distance Relationships Work

Long Distance Relationships - Tools To Cope

Long Distance Relationships (LDR) Contemplation: Sticking with plans

The Long Distance D/s Relationship

Mental Health

BDSM practitioners ‘healthier and less neurotic’ than ‘vanilla’ peers

Body image & BDSM

How to Get Over Feeling Sad

Is BDSM normal?

Love your Vulva – a self-esteem guide to your sensitive bits!

Managing bipolar disorder in a D/S relationship

Meditation And Mindfulness

On Cutting

Steps For Letting Go of Painful Memories

Things to Do When You’re Anxious, Scared, or Just Need a Distraction

Tips for Recovering from Codependency

What Are Anxiety Disorders? (Infographic)

Why Do I Feel Unloveable?

Relationships

10 Habits of Happy Couples

10 Top Communication Mistakes

10 Types of Emotional Manipulators

12 Relationship Truths We Often Forget

50 Best Ways To Say “I Love You”

BDSM Breakups: All Good Things Must Come to an End

BDSM: Control Goes Both Ways

Collars and Collaring - A Personal Perspective

Communication Is Key

Concept Daddy Dom/Little Girl Relationships

Daddy Doms and their little girls

Daddy Doms, Baby Girls, Little Boys And More

Date Night In A Jar

DD/lg In Public

D/s and Domestication

Factors That Make A Relationship

Finding Love When You Least Expect It

Finding Others with Common (Adult) Interests

How To Be Present In Your Relationships

How To Build A Healthy Relationship

How To Get What You Want In A Relationship

How To Know When You’ve Found “The One”

How To Take Your Relationship To The Next Level

Importance Of Confidence In RelationshipsImportance Of Trust In A Relationship

Key Ingredients of a Happy and Healthy Relationship

Needy Girls Are Daddy Dom Bait

Relationship Advice To Follow, And What To Ignore

Searching for a D/s partner?

Self-Fulfilling Prophecies In Relationships

Stop Arguments Before They Start

The Rewards of a Submissive

Types Of Relationship Insecurity

Well-Balanced Power Exchange Relationship

What Is Real Love?

When He Doesn’t Call

Why Love Makes A Night Of Kink Even Better

Safety

Another life ruined because of the morality police

Bondage Basic Safety: Crops, Paddles & Bondage!

Kinks, Risks, How To And Why Sometimes You Shouldn’t

Limits in BDSM

What is Emotional Abuse?

Self Improvement

10 Tips for Creating a Happier Life

10 Steps To Self Care

10 Ways To Be Happy

10 Truths To Live By

Guaranteed Ways To Be More Attractive

How to be Yourself

How To Deal With Your Enemies

How To Ignore Haters

How to Recognize a Toxic Friend

How to Stop Being a People Pleaser

Slut Shaming Explained

Tips for Healing a Broken Heart

What are the Signs of a Jealous Friend?

Sex

50 Cunnilingus Tips from Women

Basics of Breath Play

D/s or Kinky Sex?

Fetishes Explained

How To Make A Girl Squirt

How To Tell Your Son About Sex

Intersection of BDSM and Queer Heterosexuality

Sensual Biting

Sex: Myths & Stereotypes

Sex: Practical Details

Sex: Pregnancy and Birth Control

So You Want To Try Anal? A Practical Guide For Women

Squirting Educational Video

Squirting Notes

Toys

Advice on Dildos and Buttplugs

BDSM on a budget

Bondage Rope: How To Choose Yours (And More)

Training

10 Considerations for Inexperienced Subs

30 Things You Can Do For Your Human Kitten

40 Very Important DD/lg Facts

Age Play: A Short Guide

BDSM for Beginners: Safe and Affordable Play

DEFINED: SSC (Safe, Sane & Consensual) & RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink)

Etiquette in BDSM Part 1

Etiquette in BDSM Part 2

Exploring the D/s Lifestyle: Part 1 - Beginnings

Exploring the D/s Lifestyle: Part 2 - The Dominant Mind

Glossary of BDSM Terms

Guide To Blood Play

Guide To Bruising

Guide To Talking Dirty

Guide To Wax Play

How Do I Get Started In BDSM?

How to Make a Blanket Fort/Cuddle Nest

How To Make A Comfort Box

Introduction To BDSM

Newbie’s Guide To Vaginal Fisting

Punishments in BDSM Relationships

Red Flags For Online BDSM Relationships

Some Thoughts On Rules

The Leash Has Two Ends - Responsibility

The Need For Rules and Discipline

Now you have a legit reason to do so.

And I found that account because another account followed me and had them in their likes, that account is @ / fojaker

I came here because my own post about it probably wont get seen much, but I can send it to you in DMs if you’d like. But you have a much bigger following I’m sure and more likely to get the info out if needed. Sorry if this is weird.

Wow these guys really blew the lid off stalking kids in the supermarket. This is behavior people can get charged for. Red flags for things like kidnapping and child sex trafficking. Block and report these blogs. Nothing consensual to see here. Pure exploitation of minors. Definitely bring bullshit like this here so I can help extinguish it. I still have some reach on kinky Tumblr.

@g6tm6ney

@keepitnasty91

@fojaker

This is not a safe website for kids. There is literally a confessed pedophile who Tumblr users have told Tumblr @staff about for the past 3 years who continues to use this platform to sexually prey on teens and children. They can not/do not get rid of him. He is right here:

@the-dominant-game

Or click HERE when he blocks me

If you start ballet at 16, you are too old to ever expect to be able to do it seriously. If you start at 12 you’re too old. If you want to do ballet as a serious thing, as a career, you need to start at like eight years old or even younger, because your bones and joints need to be trained while they’re still flexible in order for you to be able to perform many of the required motions and stances of ballet. In particular, you need to be able to perform turnout of the hips, but all of your joints in your legs and feet will be affected, and this irreversibly changes your body.

And yet! Nobody talks about this as a negative thing! Little girls say they want to be ballet dancers, and if their parents have enough money, that’s what they get to be! Does it cause problems in later life? Yeah, sometimes! Often, even! But nobody talks about that because it’s a thing for cis people to do and so naturally it’s all fine!

I see a lot on tumblr lately regarding the defense of underage participants in a certain community, as well as the underage participants expressing anger that they are not welcome on NSFW blogs. As a NSFW blogger, as well as someone who has come to know various sex laws due to their career, I thought I would clarify some things:

1. It doesn’t matter what the age of consent in your state is. Age of consent refers to the age that you are able to consent to sexual activity only.

2. Even if you are able to consent at age 16 or 17, by law you are still a minor. Pornography cannot be sold or viewed by minors.

3. If you are under 18 and you post explicit photos of yourself, you can be charged with creating and circulating child pornography, as the images contain a minor.

4. It is normal to have interests in sex and kink, regardless of age. There are safe spaces on the internet to seek these out and ask questions regarding your interests. Spaces where you can communicate with other teens, that are well moderated and do not allow adults to freely graze and prey.

5. As a minor, showing purposeful disregard for another blogger or a website’s request that no minors be present on the site (and for some explicit material, 21 is the age for legal viewership) puts the owner of that blog and/or website at risk. No one wants to see awesome sex bloggers get shut down or sex friendly spaces on the internet get hit for having underage members. Think about more than just yourselves.

These are some small pieces of advice for all you people who want to finger their partners but don’t know what to (not) do or where to start.

Don’t use porn as a reference: really. Don’t. You always see those male actors slam their fingers in and out of people while keeping their digits as straight as possible. As if they are trying to go through somebody in an Anime boss fight with their fingers of death. Let’s just not! 😅 Besides the fact that this is not always the most pleasurable thing to do, sometimes it’s also just plain painful and the fastest way to scratch or bruise your partners inside. So don’t!

Clean fingers: Besides pleasure you should also really keep hygiene in consideration! It’s a key element of playing with somebodies vulva/pussy. Having dirty fingers can greatly increase the chance of infections. And having longer nails can cause tears or cuts/scratches inside your partner. And the last thing you want when potentially exchanging fluids is a partner who has a small open wound inside of them. Not safe! So don’t go in there with dirty hands or longer fingernails. Make it a habit of washing your hands often, especially beforehand. (It’s one of the main reasons I keep my nails short, my hands clean and generally soft and taken care of)

It’s not all about penetration: Really it isn’t! A majority of vulva-owning people don’t orgasm from penetration alone and need other forms of stimulation to get there. So don’t focus on penetration alone. And also be mindful of any sort of accidental emotional pressure you can put on a partner by telling them you will finger them to orgasm. Just avoid stuff like that. Fingering should be done as a fun act on it’s own. It should be done as foreplay. As fun teasy activity. As ways to edge a partner on. And occasionally a way to make a partner cum, but don’t make it your end goal. Don’t only focus on the penetration. Rub the clit. Play with the labia. Use your hands and fingers in more ways than one. They are nimble for a reason. Twist. Turn. Rub. Brush. Caress. Use those fingers in more than one way.

Don’t be too rough: Listen. Seriously. Don’t go too rough. It’s better to make a partner sore because you build up slowly and then fingered them for a long time. Than you going too rough from the get go. You don’t want to cause any damage, scratches or vaginal tears.. you really don’t. Besides that, it’s not all about the power you use. But it’s more about the rhythm and motion you decide to use while playing.

Find the right rhythm: Again. It’s not really all about power, but more about finding the right rhythm. A persistent, rhythmic, gentle and nuanced stimulation is key to pleasuring your partner. Find out what works for them and then focus on fingering them in that rhythm. But also don’t be afraid to tease or alternate your partner by moving your fingers to other sensitive spots, before returning to that rhythm they enjoy oh so much.

Bend those fucking fingers: YES! Bend them. No straight-finger-fingerfucking, but twist those digits. Pull your fingertips back. Move your fingers as if you are trying to tell somebody to come closer to you (yes that movement, but with a bit more fingertip nuance!). Or as if you are trying to scratch a little itchy spot gently. It’s more about gently finding that right sweetspot(s) inside your partners vulva and then in a rhythmic way doing a “pull back”-gentle rubbing motion. Than it is to fingerslam your partner. You can obviously alter the speed of your fingers from slow to fast as you build up. Or from shallow to deep. Or move your fingers around to caress other sensitive spots. But just don’t do the whole straight-finger-slamming in and out stuff alone….bend your fingers. Move them around. Twisting motions around the inner-edge of your partners pussy can also feel good. Pull your fingers back. Push them all the way inside. Try different angles. Move your fingers apart from one another to hit two different spots inside of them or keep them together for a bigger surface pressure. But at the end of the day. You’ll just have to find that sensitive spot. Bend those fingers and make that “pulling back” motion.

Use the nerves on your fingertips: Ever touched something really hot or cold with your fingertips? Yeah, you felt that didn’t you! Your fingers are alive and have different nerves on it, making it easier to feel different sensations. This also means they can be receptive to a partner’s changing rhythms, twitches and movements inside of them and generally help you with noticing the cues their body gives you. Pay attention to these. Use your fingers in a way to understand what feels good or bad for a partner. Try to understand and learn how your partner bodies moves and feels with just the tip of your fingers. If you manage to grasp this skill you’ll be far more capable of understanding and pleasuring your partners body. Heck even finding their weak-spots is a piece of cake when you have more experience with this.

Pay attention to your partners body signs: And kinda in tandem with the previous point. Pay attention to your partners body and it’s cues or signs. Spend the first times fingering them also lowkey studying them and their reactions (just don’t make it super obvious). Make sure to pay attention to their body language, their breathing, yheir energy, their insides (see point above) and every little piece of information you can find about what feels truly good and what doesn’t. Moans or being vocal ain’t always the best of signs, so ignore those for starters. (After-all there’s a lot of pressure at times and sometimes people will fake moans or force moans because of previous bad experience or because they feel obliged to do so. Which is valid and not their fault. So more than anything focus on their body.)

Start slow and not fast: Don’t start rough or fast from the get go. But start slowly. Build up to it. Give your partners body time to catch up and get aroused. Start slow and then build up the pace or intensity over time.

You got a mouth, so use it: “Wait to lick or..” Well, no. Not in this case. What I meant is that the handy thing about fingering is, that you can focus on other aspects while performing this type of foreplay. You can for example dirty talk with your partner. Praise them. Degrade them. (With their consent) Groan for them. Tell them how nice and warm they feel. Continue to make eye contact. Pay attention to their expression. Don’t just finger them silently. Use that mouth of yours to be vocal. Or to kiss, lick or bite them (their neck for example). A good fingering session has more aspects to it than just fingerplay.

Everyone is different: As much as my advices might help you improve your skills or be more aware of things. Also realize that every person is different and every body works different. For some people a twisting motion with your fingers is too much. For others it’s the perfect stimulation. Don’t go in assuming you have the “key” or combo-move to pleasure every vulva. That’s a recipe for failure. But instead have patience and see every new potential partner as a body you have to study and understand. Everyone is different. Use your skills, patience and experience to learn what your partner enjoys instead.

Can we stop saying "good girls edge don't cum"? Or at least say "bimbos" or whatever.

I can't edge only, my brain wouldn't think of anything else and I'd go crazy. Denial is not for us. Besides, Master owns my Os, and when I ask him to cum, or when he tells me to, I cum for him. And he says I'm his good girl. 🥰