Marijuana Enthusiast

I'm not like normal people

I'm lacking in some way and I'm not sure how

I feel like when people talk about me to other people it's only in passing

Like "yea he's pretty cool" and on with the conversation

Nothing special

I'm easily forgettable

Yet I know people do care and would be upset if they knew anything had happened to me

And I hate upsetting people

Lately I've been wishing people would just forget about me so I could disappear

Forever

where does it end?

plagued by endless torment

forced to endure the suffering or end it all

building your mind

simply for it to be drawn and quartered

until it eventually gives and you've been torn at the seams

who has the answer?

what is the cure?

how much more of this pain must I endure?

the lows hit so hard

and the highs barely peak

before they're brought down like planes

crashing at my feet

optimism feels forced

when it once ruled my existence

which part of me is right?

which part has my demons?

now they're all wearing masks

and they're pulling on my feelings

I don't even know who I am

or how I'm still breathing

deer in the headlights

stuck in the mud

just waiting out my inevitable demise

there is nothing but darkness

all is calm in the end

no more burden of consciousness

no longer distraught by my own inconsistencies clouding my sense of self value

death is bitter sweet

but it's the best solution

to a mind that's been beaten

by the tides of the ocean

it's been withered away

"falling way too hard"

broken record

I lose my temper

I played that record every day

made my life all black and gray

reaching for the stars

falling short and hard

I never got that far

and I always end up at the bar

it always feels the same

I guess I'll try and change my ways

(chorus)

this one's different

some inconsistency

and maybe she's

just the perfect one for

me

I'm so nervous

I'm shaking at the knees

turns out she just wants to

rip out all my seams

(verse 2)

No hesitation

I jump in head first

I know I'll probably break my neck

but the feelings stronger in my chest

for once it's not the same

I dont feel insane

this one's finally right

I've finally had the perfect night

is this what love feels like

i think I've actually found my sight

(to chorus)

(bridge)

I hate the taste of liquor

I hate the thought of you more

I've never felt this feeling

I've never felt so sore

I tried to fight my feelings

but I feel so insecure

I opened up my life to you

but you shut the god damn door

(back to chorus)

I stitched myself up

pulled myself together

I won't let my life

depend on the weather

I know I'll feel content

with the greatest girl I've ever met

but I hope the feelings strong