The Finest Shit You Can Find

once i had a dream that my cat was working at mcdonalds w/ me and she had a lil uniform and she kept getting fur in the fries and everyone was yelling at me and saying “ur cat sucks on fries” and i was like “shes just a cat give her a break!” and i woke up crying

me in the nursing home on my 2 hours of awake time

Having adhd and getting those questions on homework or tests that say “explain your thought process” like oh boy are you sure you wanna go down that road buddy

Wish I was floating in a big glass tank full of neon green fluid while a bunch of guys in lab coats monitored my brain activity

you are, king. you just don't know it yet.

Wheres that "before pride month ends does anyone want to admit they have a crush on me" post, like I know it's only the 11th but I cant stop thinking abt it

Honestly I think the bowser version is better than the original