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every time i hear that quote, i think about how i got this light-up pen

so this guy behind her, whom no one was talking to, for some fucking reason says “wathing your weight? but what about the wait for your watch?“ (which is a completely unhinged response. like just complete Mad Hatter nonsense)

anyway this lady gets really uncomfortable and of the five people (me, him, her, the other checker, and the customer at the other register) who were now sucked into the uncomfortable silence, i decided that i should alleviate the tension by saying “you can’t wait for a watch; you don’t have the time”

Yes, you read that right.

On the eve of Autism Acceptance Month, Google, the most widely used search engine, is teaming up with Autism Speaks to collect and send data to researchers in order to essentially “eliminate” autism. I don’t think I can understate how eugenicist this is. It is genocide by definition.

It is imperative that we speak up about this. Every autistic person (including myself) know that Autism Speaks is a hate group in all but name.

There’s not much to say about this except it is VERY wrong.

Nothing about us without us. Listen to autistic people.

For many Autistics Autism is multigenerational and is a family culture

But Autistics are proud of that especially when they know they had ancestors who would’ve been locked in an asylum and tortured to death for being proud of who they were.

The Genetic link with Asd is beautiful However weaponizing this for Eugenics and to Eliminate a group of people and our ways is … Reprehensible.

I am proud to be Autistic

I am proud to be Disabled

I am proud to be a multigenerational Autistic

I am proud of being a member of the first asylum free Generation in America

I am glad to be the recipient of the hard work of people who fought for Disabled people to get Civil rights which we got in 1990

100 years of women’s vote my ass.

Most states still have mental competency tests for voting.

I am Glad to learn from the solidarity of actions and deeply grateful to the Black Panthers who assisted us in getting our rights

Brad Lomax especially should be named

All of the things about autism and Autistic culture are something to be proud of not hide From

We are in a moment right now where we are setting the tone for what we want our culture to be going forward which means recognizing Our intersectional siblings needs and fighting for the collective liberation of Disabled people

Record as much as we can about our current cultural observations on nuerodivergence so they can’t destroy our history like they tried to do with Asylums, with myths about us being supernatural beings to be hunted

Horror movie stereotypes

No big corporations like Autism speaks have control over a lot of assets due to their board.

Most concerning is the way A$ controls the narrative of Asd disability and nuerodivergence in the media

Google I Am autism video.

The guy who started autism speaks owned NBC

Andrew Wakefield worked for autism speaks when he published his vaccine lies that have almost led to the death of a million people in the US Alone

I’m a 16 year old boy born in the year 2005. I have never played a GTA game until about 3 hours ago. It was on the old PS2 my dad has. It was certainly an experience let me tell you that.

Starting Up

The game opens with a pretty long loading screen, a screen that was less of a start menu than a pause menu the game pretends is a start menu, and after creating a new game, I got bombarded with cutscenes, explaining that I was coming back home from prison (I think, I could’ve just moved), and getting harrassed by the police (giving us the games theme of police violence), I just skipped it. The game opened me in a random lot and told me to use the games bicycles. I could not use the games bicycles, so I just got out on foot and started wandering around.

Punching People In the Face

One of the first that struck me as odd about the game was the controls. Not the movement the movement was fine. It was kinda the fact that the game doesn’t use dialogue boxes, instead the game tells info over cutscenes and a mechanic where you, when hearing people talk about you, can select left or right and see whether or not you act confrontational or nice about it. I did not know this. To me, the only way to interact with the NPCs was punching them in the face. So that what I did, made a game of it, I’d punch people until a got bored and then ran from the equally incompetent as trigger happy and corrupt police (An ordinary experience for African Americans in the Big City, I guess?). Alongside that the camera was kinda crappy, I think I could move it around with the select button but it did not do much. Combine all this with the clunky as hell PS2 graphics and you get an oddly surreal experience. This was compounded by…

Welcome to the Hotel Jefferson (Such a lovely place)

After a lot of very aimless wandering, I came across a hotel called Hotel Jefferson, I’m sure it’ll be important later as it stood out to me. First off it was the first building I could actually enter and not just walk up to and stand around. It was around 3 floors and I think I was trapped in there for 10 minutes. After some aimless wandering around and trying to figure out the controls, Start opens the menu, X punches people, Another button ran, another button jumped and another button did literally nothing (I think it might be an auto-aim for combat), and then, I decided I wanted to leave and began to wander around looking for an exit, and I kept looking and looking. I soon realized I could not find the exit. The room I remembered there being an exit in, the room with the stairs, just lead to a fire exit I couldn’t actually use. I wandered and wandered around the same four rooms and hallways for quite a bit. I almost quit, until I got a sudden burst of confidence, I will exit these rooms. When I reinterred the rooms, I used the camera control buttons I discovered to scan around the room for an exit, discovering that the different hotel rooms were numbered and after some looking I discovered the rooms 1-4, and after going through that hallway, I discovered I was on the second floor the whole time.

I should clarify I entered the Hotel Jefferson through the first floor, I guess I just wandered up to the 2nd floor and then forgot about it. To be honest, my jaw dropped when I realized I was on the second floor the entire time. The weird and overwhelming sense of discovery overcame me and I can still picture that moment quite clearly now a good while after the fact. With that I had finally escaped the labyrinthian hell of Hotel Jefferson.

This Game Has a Story?

After an incident were I tried to experiment if I could kill NPC’s in this game (a solid maybe, I can certainly knock them down). I discovered this game had a mini-map leading me to a place called CJ. And after a lot of running, discovering this games stamina system and weird random bars that keep popping up (They might have something to do with a menu I discovered by hitting either Select or one of the triggers). I found CJ.

CJ as it turns out was my Moms house and my first story event in the game. I wandered around, I realized my character, who I half presumed was a teenager was super buff, sightly laughed at the unironic attempts at melodrama and cinematic cutscenes with these character models, I met our old friend Big Smoke. Big Smoke was a fat guy in a green outfit who was my characters old friend, after comforting me about my character’s mom’s death, we went to her grave, and met up with the jacked guy.

I do not remember the jacked guys name, all I remember is that  he has a girlfriend who may or may not actually like me, he hates me for abandoning them, I think he might be my brother, and he’s cliched as hell.

I was audibly cringing at the scenes between him me and his girlfriend, it was such a mid-2000′s African American cliche. And I don’t watch black media from the mid 2000′s that much, I could just smell the cliches from that storyline. There was a neat moment where he pointed out the victims of police brutality and they contained both Lil’ Drake and Big Drake. That made me chuckle a little. After that I commented that these characters act like gangster but are all talk and know show, and then they got into a shoot out and they told me to get on a bike. After more clunky bike controls, I wound up trying to test the combat a bit more, got shot and died. After some wandering around the hospital looking for a save point (I didn’t find one), I decided that was time to quit.

Overall