tumpet. bwaa

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One thing I love putting in my fantasy and scifi that so many stories I read don't have is superstitions that are just wrong. Astrology type shit. Wizards being assigned an elemental type that's supposed to determine their personality just because that's how it's been done for centuries because ages ago people believed in it and these days people are like "no of course it's a silly superstition haha" but still glance knowingly at your metal type tattoo when you're being headstrong. Societies who believe that the stars determine your destiny because see, this kid was born under the star that indicated intelligence so we pushed her in school and got her special tutors so she could live up to her potential and look, she IS more academically successful than her peers born under other stars! People talking about their religion in the far future and all the side characters are like "that sounds like fucking nonsense" and they're like "no it's TRUE" and the audience is like 'no that's nonsense'. I love inventing shit for characters to just be totally wrong about.

you can honestly be having the worst day of your life, open tumblr and there's your long time mutual who has recently gotten really into toy story yaoi just posting away

at my local thrift warehouse where nothing’s priced and you make an offer on all the stuff you find. well i told the person at the register i’m on a budget and didn’t know if i could afford a rug i wanted and asked what they’d take for it and without missing even half a beat they said “how about a cup of blood?” then they started hopping up and down like a cheerleader and said “cup! of! blood!”

we settled on seventeen dollars cash.

the problem is i love to riff with people so it got deeply deeply weird for about 3 and a half minutes before we finally agreed on the price.

this girl was showing all the signs of being a secret mermaid so i pushed her into the pool and she turned into a forty foot long mosasaurus which is tbh way cooler

not really sure how to get her out though

for those of you asking why i pushed her into the pool in the first place: i work for a duplicitous small town aquarium and i'm trying to kidnap mermaids to jump through hoops and shit to entertain tourists and make money. fucking obviously. now that i know she's actually a mosasaurus though i Have fallen in pure-hearted love with her

tumblr is like an abandoned space station & you all are the thing in the vents

not me though. im girl with tanktop