creature of desire

My dad is a science teacher at a public middle school. A month after turning 50, he suddenly learned he has stage 4 colon cancer that's metastasized to his liver and lungs. When I visited him in the hospital, he kept repeating the words "I'm scared. I don't want to die." I turned my head to the wall and cried.

My mom, an LVN, has been driving to his place often in order to care for him and empty his ileostomy bag, which he's still too scared to even look at. Not being able to go to the bathroom normally, and dealing with accidents where the bag of his own waste bursts and leaks onto him makes him feel humiliated and is causing him to become extremely depressed.

We're thankful that my mother a nurse, but she makes much less than he does as a teacher, and has been draining her retirement for his treatment. She's also had to take ubers lately to go see him because she can't drive at night, as she has a serious vision disability due to a genetic condition that eventually results in blindness.

Most of the money received is from my mom, other family members, and former students of my father. But what's maybe even more important than the amount received, is the number of people donating. I can see how hopeful and excited it makes my dad to see just 5 donations in a day from people he doesn't know.

When multiple strangers donate even just $5 each in a day, I can tell that it makes him even more excited than it does to see that same amount donated by one person in a day. (which is still very exciting!! One person who reblogged this donated $100, which was so generous that my parents were scratching their heads trying to figure out who they knew with the name Adrian. Thank you so much to that very kind person who doesn't even follow me 😭🤍🩷)

The other day, I asked mutuals to donate, and 5 people sent $5-$25, bringing the gfm up ~$80. My mom called my dad to let him know, "all those donations came from her freaks on tumblr!!" He thanked me over and over and was amazed when I told him this post was shared 500 times. He said, that's so many people! It really brightened his day so much.

I would appreciate it if you could take the time to open his page, even if you can only donate $1. For you, it may be just a small dent in our goal that won't make a difference. But to him, it shows that there's one more human out there who sees him, who's thinking about him, who knows his name, knows what he's going through, and wishes for him to recover. Even a dollar means the world to us!!!

Please, think about saving this post and donating $1, $5, or $10 this week. Share it online, with people you know irl, with anyone who could help. If you can't spare anything now, I'd appreciate if you could take the time to just pray for him and his recovery. You can send an ask to let me know if you'd like, as prayers are something that comfort my dad a great deal.

Thank you everyone who's supported us so far, I love you all dearly and I'm so incredibly grateful for your help.

Edvard Munch