Bill Sellers

Okay, friends! So like, I’m sitting here at home, all cozied up in my jammies, pillows floofed and blankets turned down perfectly. I mean, I am ready for my scheduled 3.5 hours of beauty rest, you know? But then, it like, totes dawns on me that I completely spaced introducing myself! So I thought, “welp, self, we’d better correct this.” And so…Here I am! Now, I know what you’re all thinking- it’s almost 4:00 AM Mason, why are you worried about posting an intro now? The answer is simple, really! It’s because I deffo couldn’t even think about sleeping now that I’ve realized my error! So, without furhter adieu…

Hi everyone! I’m Mason McCarthy- yes, the Mason McCarthy, for all you cheer-centric guys, gals, and nonbinary pals- and I just moved into town! I’ve decided to accept a position as Cartersville High School’s Head Cheerleading Coach! I just know I’ll totes be seeing each and every one of you at all of our games and performances, so be sure to stop by and say “hi” when you come! It’d be great to get to know some folx before then, though, so like…Comment on this, and tell me who you are and how your day is going! It’s like an ice breaker, but over the internet! Okay, I’m going to go now, for reals this time! I can’t wait to get to sleep, so I can wake up and see all your answers! Have an awesome day! <3

Shit man, you are far too awake for someone that hasn’t had any sleep yet writing that. I feel like my eyes need earplugs, to much energy this early in the morning. That fucking energy bunny got nothing on you does he? You out energize them. Anyhow, I’m Bill Sellers, 40, librarian by day, bartender by night and that’s all the info I’m sharing over the internet.  Pleasure to meet you. 

Red it is – and we’ll definitely try to live up to the usual standards, and not disappoint!

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You did not disappoint, nor did all the other performs. I had fun last night, absolutely loved the vibe of the evening. 

The real kick in the pants is that I didn’t forget, I just got more upset, and felt sick too. So the entire thing really backfired on me. I haven’t been drunk since college, either, so it’s new territory for me. Water is a given, but I’ll order in something greasy and home it helps. And for the emotions, believe me, nobody wants to hear about all this. But you’re sweet, Bill.

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Ay, that’s not good. Things backfiring at you are never good. Try me, I might want to hear about it all. Unless it has anything to do with a major crime that can get you locked up for years, I think I’ll survive. But only if you want, of course. 

Bill cheered loudly as the first performers stepped on stage. Unfortunately, he had to take the evening off to make it here, but he deemed it worthwhile, especially when he looked at his companion for the evening. He managed to talk Elena into joining him. "No regrets that you agreed to come out with me tonight," he asked, leaning into her personal space so Elena could hear what he was saying over the loud music.

Do you ever wish you could just.. push a button and turn off every emotion possible, just so you don’t have to feel for a while? I thought maybe booze would help accomplish just that, but after a full day of drinking yesterday, I can confirm that it did nothing aside from give me a wicked hangover that I’m still mildly suffering from.

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Booze’s famous for that. Makes you forget for a few hours but the emotions always come back. At times, tenfold because you are feeling like shit due to that hangover. Drink lots of water and eat some greasy food. That hopefully helps with the hangover. As for for the emotions, I’m a good listener. 

I promise you your balls will remain in tact.   I’ve been zip lining for years and no harm has ever been done to the boys.  Lets justs not talk about the incident in Brazil

Found a few interesting volunteering experiences , which my clients might enjoy, I’m particularly keen on one based in Nepal, which as soon as I have the climbing centre fully staffed with a instructor I can one hundred percent trust to keep my baby safe whilst i’m away , i’m going to go and experience for myself.   Oh  And I  charmed my way into getting GAPAttack USA  promoted in a number of magazines etc.  Mama Abrams didn’t give me these baby blues for nothing.  

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Oh but we are so talking about the incident in Brazil now... what happened? 

Just let me know red or white and I’ll make it happen. We should have a great group of performers, too, so you won’t even have to pretend.

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Red will do. Over the years I’ve come to enjoy the Open Mic nights at CEJ so I’d expect nothing less then the best of what this town has to offer. 

No, it’s just dealing with the VA can be a bitch and a half. The offer is kind of you, though.

I just did what I felt drawn to do.

I hear ya. I’ve been told that they can be a royal pain in the ass at the best of times. Don’t want to think what they are like at their worst. 

As someone who was adopted, blood and DNA has never dictated family, but I truly believe that family is who you choose, and who chooses you in return. Because when I won Miss Texas, way back when, I let it slip I was a stripper and lost my shot at Miss America. They didn’t take too kindly to that. See, the St. James name is to southern pageants as the Kardashians are to trashy reality television, rich, powerful, and highly overrated. My parents are okay, though it’s sometimes obvious they ain’t as accepting as they try to seem, and my siblings ain’t half bad, but the rest of the family is a different story.

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No fucking way, they didn’t let you go through to the big finale because of your profession? What bullshit is that? Good to hear that your parents are partly accepting, although it must fucking hurt knowing that they don’t have your back all the way 24/7/365. If you ever want to trash talk the rest of the family over a drink or two you know where to find me. 

@tythejoker

Wow , can’t believe how busy i’ve been lately .  Seem to have spent my time travelling from one end of the country to the other promoting the business at one travel expose to another.  They all started merging into one another after a while.   But I’m back and for those of you who signed up to the zip lining trial, I should have a date very soon. 

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Well fuck, just when I thought my balls were safe you return, 😛 What’s the latest and greatest in the traveling world? 

Front row seats, done. If you applaud with genuine enthusiasm and encouragement, the first drink’s on me, even.

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Free drink? Deal! I’ll polish up my best cheers and bring them with me.

Would you really get me a big one that takes a week to finish? You’ll be a good guy if you do.

Ah yes, I should be banned from kitchens.

We’ve had fliers up at the bar for a week now, but just in case anyone’s missed it, we’re throwing the doors open for an open mic night at Cotton Eyed Joe next Friday, October 15th! I’ve already got a few names on the list for performers, and anyone can sign up as long as there are slots available, but having an enthusiastic audience is every bit important as the people on stage, so hopefully I’ll see a few of your smiling faces in the crowd!

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I hereby send you my audition for the part of 'dude in the crowd’. I’ll bring my best smile. 

While I don’t think I could be as charming as you are, that is very good to know. I’m sorry you had to find out the hard way, that sounds terrible. But it’s great that you can turn it around as a learning moment for yourself and others. I can’t even gather what I would feel if my way of life would hurt the people I care about. It’s just one thing to say you want to make a life outside of work versus actually doing it. I suppose I’ve just been waiting for the right moment. You seem to be quite the expert at getting out and enjoying life, I’m impressed. You even seem to work at some of the best places to go to enjoy yourself. What a great coincidence, I would really like that.

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I think you could, and it wouldn’t take a lot to be charming. Just be you, that enough. C'est la vie, you live and you learn. Trust me when I say you don’t ever want to know how you’d feel. It is the worst feeling imaginable. I try. The little free time I have I like to spend doing things I enjoy doing. Oh fuck yeah, let’s do this. When are you free?