Baby Bill hawks who is looking after you?
@definitely-future-luke @emeerpunchenbaugi @anons
agahgahsgnbmdu degaj
????? @billhawks hghgjfhs inm tan
Oh my god… Mr. Hawks actually had a baby?! Why didn’t he tell me???? (I won’t lie, I’m feeling a little hurt.)
Poor thing! Where’s your mother at? Well, I don’t mind taking care of you in the meantime! Don’t worry, I’m an excellent babysitter!
Get in.
What the hell are you doing?! Did Bill give you permission to look after his baby?! (Well, he didn't ask me either, but I'm at least his friend...) Baby Bill needs someone who is actually capable, and out of everyone here it's pretty clear that I'm the best babysitter, isn't that right Bill Jr.?
Oh, I know you! You’re Bill’s friend! I guess you wouldn’t know me, since I’ve been a nameless background character until now… I’m Bill’s unpaid intern.
Look, I won’t argue with you. I’m pretty incapable, and a bit of a loser. You were Bill’s friend, so I trust you.
I can't believe I'm doing this, but I couldn't just stand by while this useless intern put Bill Jr. in an empty pet carrier. Everyone knows to put a pee pad in those damn things! Infants make such a mess!
Alright Bill Jr.! It's your lucky day - I've been given the day off from greggs! Apparently we're in a period of mourning. All the greggs in the country have closed out of respect for Bill, since he loved the place so much. Oh er, sorry about your dad by the way. I know you'll be seeing him again soon though!
babaabba??^×&
Right! Let's see, what do you do with kids anyway?
Ah! How about we go to a museum? Those are suitable for babies
Oh look at these dinosaurs Bill! Aren't they so fun and cute and child friendly?
uuuuuuUUUUWAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWAAAAAUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASWEWEEAAAAEEEEEEEEEE
Oh Bill Jr. do you like them? can't really tell, everything just sounds like goo goo gaga to me... Ok, let's get going. I would take you to Greggs, but it's obviously closed today so uh, I guess we'll get McDonald's? Yeah. You can have a happy meal I guess.
AOUGH AOUGH OUGH OUGH OUGH OUGH!
WHAT THE FUCK?! BILL! GET BEHIND ME!
AUGH AOUGH AUGH! OGH UGH AU-
OGH! >:( AUGH AUGH RAURGH RARGH AUGH AH OUGH! >:( AUGH RARUGH AUGH! >:(
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON
FUCK ME! WHAT THE HELL?!
WHAT AM I DOING ON THIS THING?!?!! HELLO?!?!
RAUGH! OUGH OUGH AUGH OUGH! >:(
>:( AUGH OUGH OUGh oUGH ogh
-_- Aough AOUGH OUGH RAURgh roawrgh
-_- Raugh Augh... AUGH rawrsh augh -_-
...Augh... ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
........Alright then! That's the end of that, I guess? It's sleeping? What the fuck is a dinosaur doing outside Mcdonalds?
Anyway, let's get you that happy meal Bill Jr.! Hmmm what should I order? I guess I'll get some nuggets
mmmmmmn babgsysgsyh severely traumatised
nsusgubsvsys jshshsu ojmimomokmomomomo babababababba
Hm? What was that Bill Jr.? Sorry, this McDonald's is pretty loud. Your happy meal is ready now anyway!
Wait, where do you live anyway? I guess I'll just give you back to that intern of Bill's after this. You'd probably like being back at Bill's office wouldn't you?
MMMMshek :)))))))) hghhhyyhyhyomomomomkmomomo Ama
I'm glad you like it Bill Jr.! That Shrek toy sure looks fun! Right, I guess I'll just drop you off with the intern now.
@billhawks here you go, intern. You can have him now. We had a great and totally not kind of traumatic day, isn't that right Bill Jr.?
Oh! Bill Jr, I wasn’t expecting to see you again! Did you have fun with your friend? Now I can finally get started on your Instagram page!
Wait… no! I can’t let myself get distracted by Instagram!
You’re… Clive, right? Sorry, you’re probably busy, but could I talk to you about Bill? I have the feeling he’s in trouble!
Hm? Oh, sure. What's going on, intern?
Thanks for hearing me out! Uh, hmm, where do I start…
Have you heard anything from Bill since he died? Or directly before his death? Anything at all? He’s never been dead this long, but maybe he’s just been contacting someone else instead of me, you know? I know you and Bill were friends, so maybe he told you something?
Although I’ve always been honest will Bill, he’s usually kept a thing or two from me. I get why though. I guess I just wouldn’t understand his complicated Prime Minister business…
Shit. What do I say? Would Bill even want this guy to know anything? Hmm... He seems to know that Bill's alive though, so it probably won't hurt to tell him what I know...
Yes, I have in fact been in contact with Bill. However, that was shortly after his death. He hasn't been in contact with me since. I even offered to help with whatever he has going on but I haven't received any reply.
I have no idea what he's up to now, but I assume he's preparing for his return... I will admit, I am a little concerned considering the amount of time that's passed, but I'm sure he'll be fine.
S-So he’s alright??? Thank goodness! I had a feeling, but… hearing it from you makes it much more real.
The thing is, I don’t think Mr. Hawks is alright!! Someone… or something, is preventing him from coming back to us! Think back to that awful murder… someone’s out to get him! They must really not like Bill, considering the state of his corpse. We have to stop them! Unless you’re busy, of course. Then I’ll stop them!
Oh… I guess I’ll have to bring Bill Jr. along. Maybe I’ll just drape something over his carrier, so he doesn’t get traumatized. Haha, he’ll be like the Luke to my Layton!
Abbabbbababa babn eeeeeeee mmmmmmnssssssssssssszzz
Well, I don't have anything better to do since Greggs is still closed, so sure! I'll tag along! Oh, we should probably give Bill Jr. something to keep him entertained in that pet carrier... Eh I'll just throw in an iPad. I see a bunch of babies with iPads in Greggs.
AGG gafambababa gsggagagaggahahhahh bibu :)))))))))))))
hehheegehegggehgege
Great! This’ll be much easier between the three of us! (Yes, Bill Jr. is getting included. )
Hmm. I wonder where we go from here? Oh, that’s right! I was looking for that guy Barton mentioned to me, Alfendi! Have you seen him around, Clive?
Alfendi... Where have I heard that na- ah. Alfendi was one of Bill's allies in the sexyman campaign, I believe. I haven't really spoken to the guy, but I saw him doing a few errands for him (that and the time he almost drowned trying to get me out of the Thames...)
Aha! Do you know where Bill's address book is? Perhaps he had his contact details written down somewhere?
Hmm, I tried to look around his office, but I didn’t look too deeply. He never liked when I snooped around in his things. So really, I would prefer to avoid going ba-
Oh. Maybe he has a contact at Scotland Yard! He did say he works there, after all. I was just talking to an officer there, I’ll ask him!
bababbaababababa?? :)))))))))))
Bill Jr! I think I’ve figured it all out!
Don’t worry. I’ll bring your father’s killer to justice!
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA babm gogoglmnpfh eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeretf wawawawawa ba ehegghegegehehghehehgheheh
