isi

i know i come on here just to gush about my boyfriend but you guys. he is ht best. i read bell hook's "All About Love", and in it she discusses how love can be healing and that is all i feel. my boyfriend told me i was "easy to love". i have had to make myself smaller in countless relationships, particularly with my closest family members, to avoid conflict and placate them. i try to hide myself, my personality for my partners out of fear of scaring them away. i feel a physical shell, these walls come up. and here comes along this wonderful and kind man who puts coffee on for me in the morning and takes me to dinner and leaves me voice messages and voicemails to wake up to and holds me while i sleep who just says these things without even realizing the weight of it, without knowing much he means to me. my god. it is shocking.