Pairing: Light/Near, implied Light/L
Note: If you havenât read Coexistence is Boredom I highly rec you do as this is directly inspired by it. Buuuut, if you havenât I suppose you can still follow. Just know I made no conscious effort to accommodate lack of backstory.
âKiyoshi-â
âItâs Light.â
Near met the brunetâs stare.
He supposed it was dumb to think the other would remain oblivious to his whereabouts that night forever. Near may have had a few choice words to describe Wammyâs newest resident, but airhead wasnât one of them (no, that was a word best suited for his blonde companion). Near only imagined, once caught, the brunet would be angrier with him, or at the very least annoyed.
Instead, he merely looked disinterested in ignoring the elephant in the room and sustaining false delusions when they both knew the truth.
Fine, then, because Near wasnât interested in entertaining false delusions either.
âLight,â he offhandedly corrected and immediately wished he hadnât, the brunetâs mouth slowly pulling at both ends. He spoke first before Light could make any unseemly remark, âHow long have you planned to dethrone L?â
âDethrone?â Lightâs brows arched almost comically. He closed his eyes, shoulders beginning to tremble the slightest bit from partially contained laughter. âWhat Iâm after has nothing to do with L.â He shook his head before looking back at Near, hazel hues piercing in their undivided attention. âDonât think everything I do is centered around him. Thatâs you allâs purpose in life.â He made a lazy sweep of his hand.
The man was as arrogant as he was full of it, but Near would play along.
âNo? So dropping out of the running for successor to establish a name for yourself, such as L, has nothing to do with him?â
âNo.â Light smiled, voice pitching an octave higher and Near felt a wave of disdain wash over him. âWhether I end up âstealing his thunderâ with my own capabilities is merely a possibility.â A certainty, Near thought, in Lightâs narcissistic brain. âNot a goal Iâve set out for.â
Bullshit.
âThen what is your goal, pray tell?â
âMy, so many questions, Near.â Light announced, leaning back against the kitchen counter top. He propped himself up by his elbows and fixated Near a leveled look. âHasnât anyone ever told you itâs rude to take, but never give?â
âLike you would know.â
âOh, but I do.â Nearâs brows furrowed, surveying Lightâs expression turned dark all of a sudden, his voice lowered to something short of a growl. âIâve given up more than you could ever imagine...â
...
What the hell was that supposed to mean?
Near messed with a lock of hair behind his ear, considering his option of issuing his confusion, but the brunetâs perceived content with staring at his face was starting to unnerve Near and he decided (filing away the subject in his head for a later date) staying on topic was the best course of action.
âWhat do you want to know?â
âMmm,â Light hummed, his mouth pressing into a thin line and glancing up at the ceiling. â...Nothing.â
Near couldnât help his face from portraying his surprise. âNothing?â
Light shrugged. âThereâs nothing you know that I already donât or canât obtain for myself, so yes, Near. Nothing.â
Nearâs muscles tensed trying to read the genius in front of him. Surely, he wanted something. He paraded around the manor like he owned the place, and Near supposed, in a way, he did, possessing some strange hold over the reason behind the estateâs existence. Someone with clutches that tight in L should have little to no problems finding out anything they needed to know.
Though, Light didnât seem to have total power in influencing L. Recalling how they interacted during their last meeting, the brunet had gotten pretty haughty when asked to detail his own shortcomings. If Lightâs influence on L wasn't absolute then that would mean he had to do some digging on his own, unbeknownst to L. He knew Light had to be the curious type (most geniuses were), but more accurately ones who didnât relent until they were satisfied, until they obtained everything they sought after and then some.
Light was that sort of person.
Nearâd been hoping the sociopath already had a list of inquires in mind to ask him. Now Near had to dig into his own brain to pull something that might prove of interest to the boy. How annoying.
âBut,â Light started, pushing himself off the counter with all the grace of the inhuman he was. Near took an involuntary step back, his personal space suddenly invaded. âIf you were to ask me what I wanted, I might have an answer for that,â he purred not too far from Nearâs ear.
Near hadnât yet decided whether Lightâs inappropriate behavior towards him was provoked whenever heâd gotten closer to uncovering the truth, Light wanted him to go away, or if the brunet was just a whore willing to fuck whomever he thought appealing. Near hadnât decided, mostly, because he never gave these times any thought outside of them currently happening, the advances always sending him turning on his heel without another word and filing them under his mental âwe never discuss this, everâ folder.
âI really liked it when you said my name, you know.â
This time proved no different.
Near didnât waste a minute longer stepping to move pass the psychopath and swore he would wear boxer shorts from that day forward when he misplaced his footing on his too-long-for-his-legs pajama pants.
He instinctively reached out to grip the cotton sleeve, his chest met with a sturdy arm, before realizing what just happened. He yanked his hand back as if Light were on fire, straightening his posture and fixating the boy a glare.
âI didnât peg you as a klutz, Near. Are you nervous?â
He never had much sense of action like Mello or many of the other Wammy children possessed to punch someone, but Near supposed it wouldnât be difficult to summon the desire when involving Yagami Light.
âDonât touch me.â
A chuckle filled the air. âIâll be sure to let you face-plant next time, then.â
âAt least the floor is clean.â
Near inwardly smiled when Lightâs face twisted. Piece of shit wasnât the only one who knew how to push buttons.
As if aware of his mistake, Lightâs controlled demeanor snapped back into place. âCute.â He commented through a tight smile.
Another thing you know nothing about, Near mused, despite himself. What his predecessor saw in this man, he didnât know. If puberty meant developing affections for pretentious dickbags, the universe could keep his.
He moved again, albeit slower this time and paying careful attention to his legs as he made his way across the floor. Fortunate enough, the brunet said nothing more as Near exited the room.
The meeting proved a bit of a failure for him. Heâd have to re-think his approach for Yagami Light. One that required less direct involvement.
For a moment he pondered, âWhat would L do?â, but after recalling what his ears were forced to listen to some nights ago, he shuttered.
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He sucked in a sharp, strangled breath. The gentle touch against his bicep ironically causing him to awaken abruptly. Crimson hues were wide and unblinking, coming to stare at the figure looming over him. He deemed he was dreaming still. The image so uncanny and visions from seconds prior fresh on his mind, coherent thinking out of reach.
Maybe it was an actual eternity that passed before his thoughts cleared and a more sensible part of him began to distinguish the concerned expression. âSoâŚâ His eyelids lowered, and his breathing slowly steadied. âSousukeâŚâ
âYeah.. Who else?â Said boy leaned back a bit, giving Rin some room.
Rin sat up and ran a hand down his face. He realized then heâd been sweating.
â...Iâm going to get you some water.â Sousuke took a step back. âHold on.â
Rin turned his head. Donât leave on the tip of his tongue, yet some disjointed, throaty sound left his mouth instead and the desire never quite made itself known. Sousuke was already out the door.
He sighed, burying his face in his palm and moving his head from side to side. Without Sousuke to talk to there was nothing to distract him from replaying the events of last night. Although, looking at Sousuke wasnât proving to be much help either.Â
Rin squirmed.
He almost wanted to follow after his friend. Make up some excuse that he needed to go for a walk if Sousuke wanted to come with (he would) and everything would be alright. There was always that sense of security with Sousuke, but it was that same security that had him out of sorts now.
He was still contemplating his decision (legs involuntarily swinging over the mattress and feet meeting the floor) when the door re-opened.
âHere.â Sousuke walked forward, holding out the bottle of water he undoubtedly bought from the vending machine.
â..Thanks,â said Rin softly. He twisted the cap off and chugged down its contents. He wasnât aware of how thirsty he was until then. Rin parted his lips with a low gasp, nearly a fourth of the bottle left, while Sousuke waited patiently for him.Â
âAre you okay?â
âYeah⌠I just..â He ran a hand through his hair. âJust a nightmare, no big deal.â
âHuh.â Sousuke sounded halfheartedly. He reached down and took the bottle from Rinâs grasp. His hand had been loose around it and it completely slipped his mind to put the top back on before it spilled on his bed. Shit. â..You should take it easy with the captain stuff, Rin. I know you have responsibilities, but stress canââ
Rin shook his head, interrupting. âItâs not that. I just.. Iâve been thinking lately.. Of my dad.â
âYour dad?â Sousuke looked at him more seriously.
âYeah..â Rin stared down at the carpet between his feet. He told Sousuke of his father before, of course. It wasnât awkward to discuss, but the weight of the seafoam gaze was making him particularly restless that morning. âI know I wasnât right last year. I wasnât...on the right path...but now...I think I am. I know I am. I think heâs proud of me, but sometimes... Sometimes I dream heâs not.. I donât think about it throughout the day, but at times... At night..â He exhaled, rubbing his neck. âMaybe it is stress, hell, I donât know.â
He felt the mattress sink where Sousuke sat next to him, knee slightly bumping Rinâs own. He adamantly avoided Sousukeâs eyes, but he heard him all the same, a soft caress, a firm declaration. âYou went through a tough time and came out a stronger person. Iâm sure your dad is proud of you, Rin. Iâm proud of you.â
Rin instantly looked up, a tight feeling in his chest. His mouth fell open, but no words came. His bottom lip quivered, and he dropped his head against Sousukeâs shoulder. âWhat are you, my father?â he mumbled, voice cracking ever so slightly. ââŚThank you... Sousuke.â
He could imagine Sousukeâs smile then. He wanted to see it, Rin decided, but Sousuke was already nudging him away and Rin only caught a glimpse in passing. âYouâre not going to be able to get your morning run in if you stay on me.â
âCome with?â he whispered.
âYeah.â
This time, Rin saw all of his smile. Warm and reassuring. Loving and familiar. A feeling of being right where he belonged. Like home.
Rin let out a humorless laugh, the few tears rolling down his cheeks.
Lelouch had longer lashes than he did. Complimenting, to his already effeminate features. Eyes like refined stones blinking back at him. Once amethyst gems now tinged in red, shimmering under the moon lit sky like a glass of wine in itâs sophistication and blood-let hue.Â
The night light poured graciously in from a cracked window and illuminated the colorlessly clad boy king in white. He looked as if a ghost already, and soonâŚ
âWhat?â
Suzaku shook his head, his thoughts promptly scattering as well. âNothing. âNothing...â
Lelouch stared at him a second longer before deciding the subject was trivial enough and dropped it. Suzaku was thankful.
âYou heard me though, right?â
âMm?â
âAbout Damocles,â Lelouch snipped in reply. He always got testy when he felt he was being ignored. Especially if by Suzaku.
âOh. Yes. Taking it down isnât going to be easy.â
âNo, it wonât,â Lelouch provided carefully. âBut if you were truly listening to me you would know that I have plan.â
âYou always have a plan.â
âAnd in this case, that plan would beâŚ?â Lelouch lingered, allowing Suzaku a moment to reiterate what he explained earlier. His objective to destroy Damocles and put an end to his brother, Schneizel. It was all very elaborate and calculative, Suzaku was sure. Such as everything was with Lelouch.
However, Suzaku had no clue the details of said elaborate scheme and his blank expression staring wordlessly at Lelouch was very telling to his ignorance.
Lelouch slumped his shoulders, exhaling deeply through his nose then raised up from his seat. One elegant movement. As if he were made of dove feathers and water. Suzaku wondered how a murderer could be so poise and put together. Didnât the blood of many weigh him down?
âSuzaku.â
âHuh?â Suzaku chimed in again, straightening his spine like he were back in the barracks.
âYouâre distracted.â
âWhat? N-no. Well⌠maybe a little. But itâs nothing-â
âWhatâs on your mind?â
âItâs nothing, really,â Suzaku spoke more confidently. âNow, this plan. What are the details again? I promise you have my full attention this time. Your Majesty.â
âDo I now?â Lelouch asked, and if Suzaku didnât know any better he would almost describe it as a purr. âWell, since I have your undivided attention, it would be a shame to waste it on repetitious words, donât you think?â
He moved closer to Suzaku as he spoke, and Suzaku, eyes widening, flinched when a hand came up to cradle the side of his face. The pads of Lelouchâs fingers were soft, sliding from his cheek to play with the curls at the nape of Suzakuâs neck.
Lelouch kept his eyes on Suzakuâs, the boy unable to look away. He didnât dare breathe. A beat more, and Lelouchâs lips were pressed to his. Suzaku made the mistake of gasping, and his heart pranged in fear that the noise would break whatever spell had casted over them, but it didnât.
Lelouch merely slipped his tongue into Suzakuâs mouth and moaned inaudibly, tilting his head to deepen the kiss. Suzaku was falling now, at some point being ushered to the emperorâs bed and sinking into the mattress with Lelouch.
Lelouch laid underneath him, looking disheveled. Lips rosy and face coloured. He always looked so flushed even after the smallest amount of physical exertion, but at the same time he still appeared so controlled. It was driving Suzaku nuts.
âIs this what had you so distracted?â he asked, still teasing a hand through Suzakuâs tresses. âMe?â
Suzaku answered by crashing his mouth to Lelouchâs and Lelouch accepted him hastily, wrapping his arms around Suzakuâs back and groaning into him.
Suzaku rutted his lower body in his position between Lelouchâs legs and the kiss broke when the older tore his mouth from the boy to throw his head back in a surprised gasp. âF-fuck, SuzakuâŚâ
âDo you like that?â
He said something that sounded like âof courseâ lost between a whine and a murmur when Suzaku continued the motion. âFuck, Suzaku, my clothes.â
Suzaku paused his menstruation to glance down, a brow raised. âWhat about them?â
âTake them off.â
Suzakuâs hands stilled. He smoothed the flaps of Lelouchâs garments down absently and drew his bottom lip between his teeth. âLelouch⌠Maybe we shouldnât...â
âNo.â Lelouch grabbed at his arm, a grip Suzaku never felt from the frail boy. âItâs fine. I want you to. So itâs fine.â He jostled Suzakuâs arm when there came no response. âThatâs an order.â
It reminded Suzaku somewhat of Euhpy. The siblings were very much selfish with their love, and if Suzakuâs grip was a little stronger, if his handling of Lelouch was a little more forceful, it was because Suzaku was reminded the awful things Lelouch did to his sister and what awful things, still, Suzaku wanted to do to her murderer. It sickened him as much as it turned him on.
âAah- Ah!â Lelouchâs cries grew more profound as Suzaku fingered his hole.
âOh,â Suzaku said breezily when Lelouch arched his back high in the air. âThat must have been your sweet spot.â
Lelouchâs whole body trembled in his arms. âI-Iâm ready now, Suzaku. J-Just go.â
Suzaku slid inside, and he was embarrassed by how fast he thought he might cum. Lelouch was so warm and inviting. He never imagined it would be quite like this. He willed himself to hold it together and moved, Lelouch sobbing with every thrust Suzaku took. âS-Suzaku, ah! F-Faster.â
Suzaku obediently complied, and he prayed the walls were soundproof from how posthaste Lelouchâs voice climbed.
Lelouch came hot on Suzakuâs abdomen, Suzakuâs hips jerking before cumming inside him seconds later. He felt horrified, stuttering apologies, but Lelouch just shushed him and smoothed his hair down, raising up to kiss Suzakuâs face.
âHush. You were lovely, my knight.â
ââŚSo youâre not angry at me for not remembering the plan?â
âAs of this moment, I donât even remember it.â
Suzaku chuckled. âYou flatter me.â He bent down and placed a chaste kiss to the corner of Lelouchâs eye. The very eye that would glow crimson and encase the beautiful, beautiful gem Suzaku had been gazing into all those years.
âDistracted again?â Lelouch questioned softly, an octave away from desolate.
âNo.â Suzaku eased his concern, lowering his head to bury his nose in the crook of Lelouchâs neck, inhaling his emperorâs scent. âIn fact, this is probably the clearest my mind has been in a long time. Lelouch.â
The question rang out of nowhere, cutting the silence that presented itself inside the childlike space for the better part of a half hour, albeit a comfortable one.
If the boy was disgruntled by the interruption, he didnât show it, Nearâs line of vision downcast to a toy heâd been eyeing for what seemed an eternity and he replied, the same dull tone he uttered most his sentences, âNothing.â
Light rolled over onto his back, the mattress dipping slightly under his shifting weight and he reached his arms out behind his head, touching Nearâs face. âYou and I both know youâre never thinking of just ânothingâ.â
âNothing direly important.â Nearâs attention remained on the figure in his lap even as his cheeks were being mashed by wandering hands.
Light exhaled a breath, moving to sit up and he stared audaciously.
It was no longer careful planning for Light to wear Near down by openly checking him out, or a pastime he dabbled in purely to draw a reaction, for his own entertainment. In the beginning it was. Successful at that as Near always ended up walking away first while Light tried to suppress his laughter, but since the passing years - and, well, Light wasnât the most patient person in the world - he learned not to grow flustered over absent acknowledgement as Near learned not to react to him at all.
No, now things were different on both sides. His gazes at the younger boy were brazen and unabashed, still, but lacked any bullying intent and Near allowed them to persist without so much of a âwhat do you want?â.
What did he want?
The skin underneath his fingertips was warm - soft - Light thought idly at the same time he wondered when his touch gravitated towards Near again. It trailed from the boyâs temple to the curls behind his ear and he noted with mild interest the boy quiver if ever so slightly.
âWhat are you thinking about now?â Light asked dreamily.
âDonât stop.â
He paused, his ministrations freezing for a moment - ironically, exactly what he was told not to do - before snorting a chuckle. Light moved his hand so his nails grazed Nearâs scalp, listening intently for the soft inhale heâd elicit from the boy, and he got his wish.
Likely, Near didnât register the implication his statement had; how suggestive it sounded out of context. That, or he didnât care.
It amazed Light how someone so straightforward and unfond of mincing words, could still leave Light scratching his head in puzzlement time and again. He stared at Near often because, yes, he thought the boy attractive and Father Time only blessed that allure further, but also (mostly?) because Light couldnât figure him out. Whatâs he thinking? he wondered constantly.
L was easier to read. He and L were more alike than Light could stand to dwell on sometimes. It was suffocating. Thoughts of soulmates and two people created for one another when no one else in the world was suitable. They were equals in mind, body and soul.
Light didnât share that same closeness with Near -
Breakfast often started around the same time for them, later than everyone else. Light suspected Near didnât want to be bothered by the morning crowd and Light simply wasnât willing to rise out of bed at 5 AM for food. It almost came as a stroke to Lightâs ego when Near responded to his idle chit-chat with more than five words.Â
Almost.Â
Though it was quite the feet compared to Nearâs interactions with most, Light could never get the boyâs attention enough for Near to actually meet his eyes, the patterns swirling in his cereal bowl always proving more interesting than Lightâs leering face. Â
Fucking look at me.
In the library, when Light would stumble upon the boy, heâd take a seat close by and Near would lay on the ground for hours, lost in an imaginary world Light could only ponder what consisted of and only vaguely noted what a piss-poor acting job he performed in reading the upside down book in his hand.
There were things that annoyed him about Near, his bluntness and indolence, but Light didnât hate him. He wanted little to do with Mello and couldnât care less about the other kids, but he actually liked Near. He told him that, and Near didnât so much entertain him a reaction.
Did he think he was joking?
- so instead it left Light with curiosity, fascination and obsession.
A playfully accusing smile pulled at the corners of his mouth. âSo that constitutes as âdirely importantâ, but what you were thinking earlier doesnât?â
He wasnât sure if Nearâs hum was in response to his query or his touch.
Light gave a moderate tug of the colorless mane and just slightly felt bad when Near winced.
âWhat are you doing?â He scowled.
â...I want to wash your hair. Letâs get in the shower.â
The rosy hue was impossible to miss staining porcelain skin. Light wouldâve mused cute if his mind wasnât lingering on the oddity of it. He found Near a lot more... direct in the bedroom than he'd shown in the beginnings of their physical relationship. It was possible Lightâs own assertiveness still managed to throw him off-guard every once and awhile.
Lightâs lips curled, despite themselves. He scooted closer. âYes. We havenât in awhile. Not together, anyway. Besides you like it when I play with your hair.â
Nearâs eyes trailed to the side. His hand raised to twist in his hair, strange since Lightâs own hand was already there, but the habit was as much as a nervous gesture as it was a plan old habit. He figured Near was feeling the prior.
âI suppose.â
Light laughed. âLook, Near. Iâm not making you do anything you donât want to.â
âAs if you could.â Nearâs eyes challenged him. âIâm answering your question. Yes.â
âGood,â Light purred and found his body tempted forward a second time, his mouth pressing to Nearâs. He traced the curvature of supple lips, slipping in his tongue and stroking the roof of Nearâs mouth until Light felt two hands pushing against his shoulders.
âAre we getting in the shower or not?â
Perhaps Lightâs pride wouldâve been wounded, the small rejection, if the eyes staring back at him werenât so impossibly dark, so impossibly telling and reflecting as if theyâd already undressed and fucked Light several times over.
Lightâs mouth felt dry. âL-Letâs go.â And if his voice came out hoarse, it was Nearâs fault. If he allowed himself to be taken by the arm, pulled into the bathroom despite it being his idea, it was Nearâs fault. If his hands clawed at the wall, scrambling to find a grip and screams coming out obscenely loud, falling asleep that night without ever having squeezed one drop of shampoo to anyoneâs head, that was Nearâs fault too.