🐉

There was plenty of chatter from where cadets roamed the fields below the citadel, enjoying their downtime during another warm and sunny day, but Freya wasn’t one of them. Instead, she was alone, perched on top of one of the massive boulders as she studied her notes from that morning’s Battle Brief.

It was early September, marking almost a month and a half in the Riders Quadrant and just under three weeks until Threshing. Freya was to have her final Gym class the following day before all cadets began their practice runs on the Gauntlet. She succeeded in all of her sparring matches thus far, including when she was against Nova the week prior, which was the closest matchup Freya experienced apart from when she fought Xaden. The two girls laughed it off and even practiced sparring in the courtyard that evening since Nova wanted Freya to show her a particular move used when they sparred. According to the list Xaden discovered of each match already set, she expected to spar with Amber Mavis. Freya wasn’t concerned about that matchup, though.

However, with Gauntlet training right around the corner, followed by Presentation Day and Threshing, Freya spent the days leading up until then prioritizing her schoolwork and helping other Marked Ones with sparring and studying.

“See you later, Freya,” a female voice said, making Freya jump slightly before looking at the source. It was Amira who spoke to her. She walked with Heidi, another marked one Freya had been helping in secret. Freya smiled at the two girls as they waved and continued toward the stairs leading up to the citadel.

Freya let her gaze fall back to her notes, trying to understand every detail about what they’d gone over during Battle Brief. There were details of the military efforts coming from an outpost near the border of Poromiel that just wasn’t adding up. She knew Navarre tended to cover up any disputes with Poromiel; the Tyrrish Rebellion taught her that much, but now there’d been attacks along the border seemingly by Gryphon riders.

If there was anything Freya learned during the rebellion, it was how nothing is as it seems. Freya’s parents and Caden did everything they could to keep her away from what they were doing, but that didn’t mean she didn’t still snoop. She knew there were shady happenings Navarre turned a blind eye to, but she didn’t know the extent of it. Freya’s family had alliances in Poromiel. She had nothing against the Gryphon riders. How these attacks were discussed during Battle Brief made Freya wonder if they were truly getting every detail. There wasn’t a single doubt in her mind that was the case, but she wanted to know more.

“It just doesn’t make sense,” Freya murmured as she continued scanning over her notes. In the distance, the bell tower tolled, indicating the start of a new hour, and she knew she’d have to wrap up her studying session very soon. She sighed and began gathering her notes to put back into her rucksack; however, the wind picked up and threatened to blow her notes away. “No!”

Freya quickly slammed her hands down against the boulder, preventing any of her notes from flying off. Based on the gasps and groans people nearby made, she knew not everyone was as lucky as her in securing their things.

Pieces of parchment breezed past her, followed by cadets chasing after them, and Freya couldn’t help but chuckle as she securely put her things away. With one final glance around the top of the boulder to make sure she had everything, Freya put on her rucksack and then began shimmying to the side so she could hop down. She was almost at the edge when the breeze picked up again, and blew her loose hair around. Then, she noticed another piece of parchment blow past her. Not thinking anything of it, Freya watched the parchment go by but didn’t see anyone trying to retrieve it. The wind blew again, but this time in the opposite direction it had been going, and Freya watched with wide eyes as the parchment miraculously fluttered back in her direction.

Then it clicked, and Freya shook her head before reaching out to grab the note, knowing a certain someone was controlling the wind. She unfolded the parchment and smiled when she saw familiar handwriting scribbled on it.

Meet me at our spot Nathan

Freya couldn’t keep herself from smiling widely. She and Nathan had been getting to know each other a lot better over the weeks that had passed. They’d meet up after curfew multiple times a week, spending hours talking and getting to know one another. They even made it a habit to meet up in private almost every day, though briefly, when Freya was on her way to the Healers Quadrant for her duty of helping with injured cadets, which was where she needed to go.

“Is that a note from your secret admirer?” A voice asked, startling Freya. A gasp left her mouth as she frantically looked over the side of the rock for its source, only to see Garrick smirking up at her.

“Gods, Garrick,” she groaned as she stuffed the letter into her pocket. “You scared me.”

“That was the point,” Garrick chuckled in response, then held his left hand up for her to hold onto. “Come on, I’ll help you down.”

“I climbed up here. I can get down on my own.”

“I know you can, but I’m trying to make your life easier.”

Freya rolled her eyes but didn’t argue. The boulder was at least three, maybe four feet taller than she was, and although Freya was sure she would’ve been fine to leap down from it, she appreciated the assistance.

Without another word, Freya took Garrick’s hand before leaning forward and putting her left hand on his shoulder. Garrick put his right hand on Freya’s ribs, then slowly and gently lowered her to the ground. The action was similar to what he’d done for her many times since they were kids when Freya would climb trees and think she could jump down from the branches without getting hurt.

“Thank you,” Freya said as she let go of Garrick and stepped back, then glanced at the boulder. “I guess that could’ve been bad if I jumped down and twisted my ankle or something.”

“No kidding,” Garrick chuckled. “I don’t think even Xaden and I would be able to deal with how miserable you’d be if you got hurt before Gauntlet training.”

“I think I’d be insufferable.”

The two laughed, then Garrick smirked as he nodded toward the parchment sticking out of Freya’s pocket.

“So, was I right? Do you have a secret admirer?”

Freya’s eyes widened, and she could feel the blush burning across her cheeks as she quickly looked away from her friend and nervously began fiddling with the bottom of her French braid.

“No,” she stated, still avoiding eye contact. “It’s just a note from a friend.”

“Ah,” Garrick responded. “And is this friend a wingleader that can control the wind?”

Freya scoffed.

“How did you know that?”

“Come on, Fray. You’re one of the people I know best. I’ve seen how you get whenever he’s around. You’ve been sneaking out a lot lately to meet up with him.”

“Again, I ask how you know that?” Freya questioned, shaking her head.

“You’re not the only one who sneaks out after curfew to see someone,” Garrick replied with a wink. “So, tell me about him. I want to know more about the guy I may have to fight if he ever hurts you.”

“It’s not like that,” she explained, chuckling and shaking her head. “Nothing has happened between us if that’s what you’re implying. We get along and I just really enjoy his company. I mean, yeah, I guess I’m attracted to him and want to be around him, but it’s complicated.”

“How so?”

“Well, he’s our wingleader. It’s a bad look on him and me to have any relationship, even if we’re just friends. Not to mention that I have a rebellion relic.”

“Woah, wait,” Garrick said, looking unimpressed suddenly. “Has he made you feel you have to sneak around because he doesn’t want to be associated with a rebellion kid?”

“No!” Freya stressed. “That’s not it at all. He doesn’t treat me any differently because of that whatsoever. It’s just that our relics already bring so much unwanted attention to ourselves. Nathan and I, we’re still getting to know each other. Privately. The fact that I have my relic and he’s a wingleader means people are always watching. He is in a position to screw me over, but, I trust him not to, Garrick. I really do.”

“I’ll be honest, I still have my suspicions about him. But I just want you to be happy.”

“Thank you, Garrick. I appreciate it. But also, nothing has happened between me and Nathan. Maybe nothing will. I do like him, though. I can’t deny that.”

“I have to ask,” Garrick started. “And please don’t think I’m prying or anything. But what about you and Xaden? I know the two of you, you know, before being relocated and, well, I won’t share what he’s told me, but you still mean a lot to him. You always will. You’re his best friend. But you know what I mean, this is a different situation.”

Freya sighed, feeling a tug at her heart.

“Xaden is part of what makes everything with Nathan feel more complicated,” she whispered. “Even though nothing has happened between Nathan and me, as time goes on, I hope something will. I like him a lot. But with that, I’m always thinking about Xaden. And that’s not fair to either of them. I don’t want to feel conflicted while thinking about either of them, but I do. Gods, Xaden is betrothed. He’ll never be mine, yet I feel guilty about falling for anyone else but him. To me, it’s always been him. But, things have changed. We grew up and three years apart doesn't mean everything can go back to how it once was.”

“Can’t say it’s a situation I’d want to be in if I were you. But, Freya, you got to do what’s best for you. Your happiness matters. Only you can decide what you want and if you need time to figure it out, that’s ok too.”

“I just don’t want to hurt either of them or myself while doing so. I know I haven’t done anything wrong. I’m not in a relationship with either of them. But, I care about them both. And I just know that even if anything happened with Nathan, Xaden wouldn’t like it.”

“Well, no, I don’t think he’d be too thrilled,” Garrick responded. “But at the end of the day, he’s going to have to accept that he’s in a situation that hurts you too. It’s not fair for him to assume you’ll just wait for him, either.”

Freya nodded.

“I want to introduce Nathan to you and Xaden properly,” she told him. “Nathan knows what the two of you mean to me and he’s starting to feel really important too. But, I don’t blame you and Xaden for being weary of him either.”

“Given his position, I can’t help but feel I couldn’t fully trust him. Honestly, I’m surprised you do. You were always the most skeptical of the three of us regarding people who don’t know us. I will say that you seem to be more open to new people than you were three years ago. However, there’s no way they didn’t warn anyone in a leadership position about the rebellion kids coming into the Quadrant and by warning, I mean drag our names through the dirt. That being said, you’ve always had the best judge of character too. It seems Nathan’s given you a good reason if you trust him.”

“He has. And he respects that because of my relic, my experience here is very different from his and most people's. I don’t expect you to like him right away, but I think he deserves a chance.”

Garrick nodded.

“I understand,” he replied. “Just be careful, Fray. He’s a wingleader, after all. He may seem fine to you, but I can’t imagine a situation where he wouldn’t turn his back on us because of who our families are. Like when all of us marked ones met up that first night weeks ago, I could’ve sworn I saw him out after curfew before we all met under the tree and thought he’d interfere if he found us. Maybe it wasn’t him, though. But could you imagine if that happened?”

“Oh! Um,” Freya stammered, her eyes widening.

“What is it?”

“Nothing!”

“Freya,” Garrick said, his tone becoming firmer. “What aren’t you telling me?”

Freya sighed.

“Nathan knows about our meetings,” she admitted, dropping her gaze as guilt took over. “He… he was with me that first night and saw everyone gathering.”

“And you didn’t say anything? Do you not realize how much danger that puts all of us in?”

“Of course I do, Garrick! I didn’t plan for it to happen, it just did. I was talking with him and intended to pretend I was returning to the dorms before meeting with everyone. I didn’t realize how long we’d been talking and we were still together when you and Xaden, then everyone else walked by. I told him what we were doing and that it was my idea. I was ready to take the fall for everyone if he told our secret, but he didn’t. I will still take that fall if I need to. I would never put my own in danger on purpose and if it becomes an issue, I will deal with it.”

Garrick exhaled, then stressfully pushed his hand through his hair.

“Xaden is going to be pissed,” he stated.

“I know,” Freya sighed. “But, please, you can’t tell him. I have to be the one to let him know. I was the one who created this mess.”

“I won’t say anything. But you need to tell him soon.”

“I will, I promise. But, I have to go to the Healers Quadrant before I’m late”

“Okay, would you like me to walk with you?” Garrick asked.

“No, I want to be alone and clear my mind a bit,” Freya told him. “Thank you, though. I’ll see you at dinner.”

“Alright, see you later. If you need anything, Fray, you can always talk to me about it.”

“I know. Thanks, Garrick.”

With that, Freya muttered a quick goodbye to her friend before heading on her way. She kept her head down as she walked to the doorway at the bottom of the stairs that led underground. Her thoughts were eating away at her and Freya wanted nothing more than to curl up and sleep instead of feeling the weight of the danger she could be putting the other rebellion kids in, but she couldn’t. She needed to get to the Healers Quadrant.

When she reached the doorway, Freya said a brief hello to Nova and Bennett as she noticed them coming down the stairs, but didn’t stop. Given the look on Nova’s face, as she went by, Freya knew Nova would ask her about what was going on later that evening. She appreciated that Nova cared, but Freya wasn’t sure she had it in her to tell Nova that Nathan was a big factor in how she was feeling.

Freya briskly made her way down the steps taking her to the underground tunnel and was met by the eeriness of being alone. Her footsteps echoed off the stone walls and an unexpected wave of dread soon washed over her; as if something bad was about to happen.

She picked up her pace, knowing the feeling would probably go away when she was no longer alone in a dingy tunnel. However, she didn’t get far before hearing the door she’d entered open followed by multiple footsteps sounding as they rushed down the stairs.

“You’re sure she went down here?” A female voice asked, making Freya’s heart pound as she glanced over her shoulder.

“Positive,” a male replied. “She’s not with Tavis anymore, this is the best window we’ve got.”

“Where’s Riorson?” A different male questioned. “Don’t need him or Tavis coming after us for killing their best friend.”

“They’re not going to know it was us,” the first male responded. “One less marked one, the better. Especially Tarlor. If she doesn’t make it to Threshing, someone else can bond the Green that Kaori was talking about.”

“What if the Green doesn’t want to bond with her? Just because it was her brother’s dragon doesn’t mean it’ll choose her.”

“Doesn’t matter, we’re already here.”

Freya’s mouth fell open in shock. She didn’t recognize any of the voices, but given the reason they were following her, she didn’t care to know either. Without a second thought, she stopped, brought her knee up to her chest, swiftly removed Caden’s dagger from her boot, and kept going.

The tunnel was long, but Freya was nearing the halfway mark. She was sure she could outrun whoever was pursuing her and get to the Healers Quadrant, but part of her wanted to see what they’d do because there was no way Freya was going down without a fight.

She could still hear them going down the stairs and knew she’d be in their line of sight soon, but before Freya could devise a solid plan of what to do next, a hand reached out to grab her left arm and pulled her toward them.

Freya immediately raised her right hand, ready to slash with the dagger she gripped, but the person was fast. It wasn’t until a second later when her back was suddenly pressed against the wall, with the person’s right hand covering her mouth and their left hand pinning her wrist against the wall to prevent her from attacking, that Freya realized it was Nathan.

An amused smirk formed on Nathan’s lips as he glanced at the dagger before letting go of Freya’s wrist and bringing his pointer finger to his mouth, silently telling her to keep quiet. Freya nodded before Nathan removed his other hand from her mouth and glanced over his shoulder. She followed his gaze but couldn’t see beyond the bit of stone wall that stuck out like a pillar, keeping her hidden. Then, Nathan stepped into the middle of the tunnel and faced where Freya had just come from.

Down the hall, Freya could hear the others still coming down the stairs, but soon their chatter and footsteps stopped abruptly.

“Shit, it’s a wingleader,” one of the boys muttered, but Freya heard him as clear as day. She was sure that was because Nathan was using his signet so he could hear them better himself.

“Is there a reason you’re down here, cadets?” Nathan asked authoritatively, a tone Freya hadn’t seen him speak with since Conscription Day. “I’m pretty sure none of you were injured today, nor do you have Healer duty.”

“Oh, um,” the girl stammered. “We were just exploring!”

“Is that so? Well, if I’m not mistaken, first-years don’t have permission to be in other Quadrants unless injured or required to be there. So, I suggest the three of you ‘explore’ elsewhere unless you want me to bring this issue to your Squad Leaders or anyone above them.”

“Yes, of course,” the second boy responded. “We’ll be on our way.”

Freya listened as the three retreated up the stairs and let herself release a breath she didn’t realize she was holding. Nathan didn’t move from where he stood, keeping his eyes on the end of the tunnel and not looking away until they heard the door open and close again.

“You’re good,” Nathan stated, then looked toward Freya again.

“Thanks,” she said, then tucked the dagger back into her boot.

“It was no problem. You seemed to be ready even if I didn’t intervene.”

“Yeah, it feels like I have got to be ready to defend myself at all times. What are you doing down here, though?”

“We were supposed to meet,” Nathan reminded her while chuckling. “Did you forget?”

“Right,” Freya groaned, then smacked her hand to her forehead. “Sorry. I know, I got your note not that long ago, but it did slip my mind. I was talking to Garrick before coming here.”

“And how was that?”

“Not great.”

“I see,” he replied. “Well, why don’t I walk you to the Healers and you can talk to me about it? If you want to, of course.”

Freya nodded.

“I’d like that,” she told him with a smile, then they started walking together. “I guess there’s no point in not being upfront about it, but, Garrick knows that you know about us marked ones meeting up after curfew.”

“Ah. Going out on a limb here and guess he wasn’t too thrilled about it?”

“Solid guess.”

Nathan observed Freya as she sighed and continued looking at the ground ahead of them, not making eye contact.

“Freya,” he started. “Your secret is safe with me. I know it’s hard to just take my word for that without seeing any proof, but I mean it. I, I wouldn’t betray you like that.”

Freya smiled at his reassuring words and glanced up at him.

“I don’t think you would,” she assured him. “And I appreciate you saying that. It’s just that I know Xaden won’t be as open to trusting you as I am.”

“And Xaden’s thoughts and opinions are important to you.”

Freya sighed.

“They are. He’s one of the most important people in my life. But, I can’t let myself constantly feel like I need his approval and validation. I care about what he has to say, but I’m my own person. That’s why I need to be the one to tell him that you know about the marked ones meeting. Any issues he has, he can take up with me.”

Nathan nodded as she spoke and Freya didn’t miss his very subtle smile.

“Understandable,” he replied and was about to continue, but stopped when a door opened from ahead. They were almost at the Healers Quadrant, it made sense for them not to be alone for much longer. Freya assumed it was a healer, but then a woman with deep auburn hair wearing a cream-coloured tunic stepped into their line of sight. Then the scribe glanced in their direction. Freya recognized her and didn’t miss how Nathan smiled seeing his sister. “Gem.”

“Nate!” Gemma greeted happily, then embraced her older brother before pulling away, smiling at him too. “How’re things?”

“They’re good.”

“And Nova?”

“Still kicking ass,” Nathan chuckled. He then glanced at Freya, who’d slightly stepped to the side. She didn’t want to interrupt the two siblings.

“I’m glad,” Gemma responded. “I wrote to Mom and Dad the other day, I’m sure I’ll hear back from them soon. You should do the same.”

Nathan sighed.

“I know, I’ve been meaning to. But you know how hectic it gets for the riders.”

“So I’ve heard,” she said, then glanced at Freya too. “You’re Freya, right?”

“Uh, yes, I am,” Freya replied, feeling caught off guard which made Gemma chuckle.

“My name is Gemma. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“You have?”

“Yes,” Gemma explained. “I always catch up with Urvi whenever I’m in the Healers Quadrant, she said you were helping out in there now. I’ve seen you there a few times now. But, I’ve heard your name quite a bit, too.”

“I see,” Freya responded, feeling a sense of dread. “I’m assuming most of what you’ve heard about me is because of my family.”

“I mean, some of what I’ve heard about you has to do with that, sure. But, the most I’ve heard has come from my brother. Nathan speaks very highly of you.”

“Is that so?”

Freya couldn’t hide her smirk as she glanced up at Nathan again and saw a smile tugging at his lips while he avoided making eye contact with her. The gesture didn’t go unnoticed by Gemma, who also smiled.

“It is,” she answered. “It’s not every day I hear about someone cracking through Nathan’s hard exterior. He must really like you.”

“Gemma,” Nathan warned, narrowing his gaze at his sister.

No more words were exchanged, but Freya watched as the two siblings silently communicated. After a moment, Gemma smirked, then moved her gaze back to Freya.

“Well, I should get going. It was lovely to meet you and put a face to the name, Freya. I’m sure I’ll see you around the Healers. And Nate, it wouldn’t kill you to visit more.”

Nathan sighed again.

“I know. Things are pretty busy with Gauntlet and Threshing coming up for the first years.”

“Of course, wingleader,” Gemma teased, making Nathan roll his eyes. “We’ll talk soon. It was nice meeting you, Freya. Goodbye, you two.”

“Bye, Gemma,” Freya replied with a smile.

“See you, Gem,” Nathan said, then nodded toward his sister as she went, waiting until her footsteps disappeared and a door closed. Once he was sure it was just him and Freya again, Nathan turned to the cadet and smirked. “So.”

“So,” Freya repeated, staring right back. She felt like he was challenging her in a way, but refused to give in to his game. “I guess I should be going, Urvi is probably wondering where I am.”

Nathan’s smirk fell.

“Right. I guess I’ll be seeing you.”

“Yeah, I’ll see you around.”

With that, Freya turned and started walking away. She knew there was more Nathan wanted to say, but was unsure if he would. Freya also knew he wanted to plan to meet after curfew again like they’d been doing for the past few weeks. But, like he told Gemma, he’d gotten busy and it’d been a few days since they met privately during the night. Not that Freya held that against him or anything either, he was a wingleader after all. But, she didn’t want to come across as annoying by asking him to meet in secret again and being shut down because of his other duties. She wanted him to be the one to ask.

“Freya, wait,” Nathan spoke up and Freya stopped before slowly turning to face him again.

“Yes?” She asked, trying to read his solemn expression. Although she felt he might mention meeting again that night, Freya still wasn’t prepared for what he would say.

“Meet me outside after curfew tonight.”

“In our other spot in the fields?”

“Outside of the dorms,” he corrected. “I want to bring you up to my room.”

“Oh,” Freya responded, feeling a warm blush washing her cheeks. She quickly looked to the ground, hoping Nathan wouldn’t see. “What if someone sees us?”

“They won’t.”

“Nathan-.”

“They won’t, Freya,” Nathan reassured as he stopped towards Freya, then gently grabbed her chin and brought her gaze back up to meet his again. “I promise.”

“Ok,” Freya whispered, then nodded as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I’ll be there.”

“Perfect. Same time as usual. I’ll see you then.”

“Yeah, see you later.”

This time it was Nathan who turned and Freya watching as he went. She blinked a couple of times before exhaling and then turning to get to the Healers Quadrant. After a few steps, she rounded a corner and jumped when she saw a familiar face there waiting for her.

“Oh, my, Urvi, you scared me,” Freya said, placing a hand over her now-pounding heart as she looked at her healer friend with wide eyes. “You listened to that entire conversation, didn’t you?”

“Sure did,” Urvi replied, then grabbed Freya’s hand excitedly and pulled as she started leading them to the infirmary doors. “And you’re going to have to tell me everything about you and Mr. Wingleader.”

~*~

That night, Freya lay awake in her bunk waiting for the right time to make her post-curfew escape. She was getting impatient as the thrilling idea of what the night could bring captured her imagination. Although she convinced herself that Nathan wanting her to go to his room may not mean anything, she had a gut feeling it did. And that feeling intrigued Freya.

After dinner, when she returned to the barracks to act like she was preparing for bed with all the other girls on her floor, Freya mentioned what was happening to Nova. Naturally, Nova teased Freya about the secret rendezvous she’d been having with her brother, nonetheless, Nova was supportive of Freya and Nathan becoming closer. It killed Freya not knowing what Nova and Nathan may have said when she was the topic of conversation, though.

After growing impatient and anxious, Freya decided to sneak out earlier than planned. The dorms were ridiculously hot with it being the dead of summer and she felt she’d suffocate if she didn’t get some fresh air soon. So, she quietly sat up and prepared for her escape.

After pulling on her tight long-sleeved shirt, Freya noticed Nova wasn’t lying in her bunk as she swiftly tied up her boots and grabbed her cloak without bringing any attention to herself. She knew Nova was sneaking out after curfew too, but didn’t know why. Bennett was with her and the two of them had been a bit odd by completely changing the subject when Freya asked what they were up to, but she tried not to worry about it. She finished getting dressed, before fading into the shadows and making her way outside.

The courtyard was quiet; peaceful even, as Freya crept along the citadel's walls and tried to remain hidden. She had no intention of wandering far since she knew she’d be meeting Nathan soon, still, she continued toward the stairs that led to the fields below. Once she neared the steps, she stopped and took a breather as she leaned against the wall, remaining covered by the darkness.

For the first time in weeks, Freya let herself relax while alone. Being on constant edge, worried about others plotting against her and her helping the other marked ones in secret, was exhausting. She was beginning to feel the toll that was taking. However, she couldn’t let others know what she was feeling. Not with Gauntlet training approaching. Freya had to stay on top of her game if she planned on making it past Threshing.

“What a mess,” she whispered then closed her eyes. However, her moment of solace was short-lived when a small pebble hit her foot. It seemed as if someone had accidentally kicked it and was lurking nearby. Immediately, Freya pushed off the wall and faced the way the rock came from. She was met by pure dark emptiness but had a gut feeling that wasn’t the case and instinctively reached for her boot to retrieve Caden’s dagger, feeling annoyed this was the second time she had to do that in one day.

“No need,” a familiar voice spoke from in front of Freya, making her instantly relax and willing to let her guard down. Xaden chuckled before stepping into the dim moonlight. “It’s just me.”

“You scared the shit out of me,” Freya replied, immediately standing up straight again since she knew she no longer needed the dagger. “What are you doing out lurking in the shadows, hm?”

“I lurk in the shadows every night. I know you do most nights too, so I’m not surprised you’re out here. Is everything alright, though? I didn’t see you much today.”

“Yeah, I’m alright. Just needed some fresh air.”

“You and me both,” Xaden replied, then awkwardly reached up to scratch the back of his head before he let his gaze fall to the ground. “I’m going to walk around for a bit, would you like to get some fresh air together?”

Freya’s heart immediately felt heavy. Over the past couple of weeks, she and Xaden had barely spent any time together that was just them. It’d always been them and Garrick, in class surrounded by others, or them with other marked ones while training or secretly meeting. Sure, they talked each day, but it was obvious that Xaden wanted to talk to Freya on a deeper scale, just the two of them, which scared her. However, she felt guilty at the same time even though she knew that if she gave in to what Xaden wanted to discuss, one or both of them would probably end up hurt to some degree.

“I miss you, Freya.”

“I miss you too,” the words left Freya’s mouth before she could even think about what she was saying. But, she meant them. She missed him and their old life a lot.

Xaden nodded and stepped closer to her until hardly any space was left between them. His fingers brushed where Freya’s were gripping her cloak and when she didn’t move them away, he linked their hands together.

“We should talk,” Xaden spoke softly as he ran his thumbs over Freya’s knuckles. “About us.”

“Xaden, don’t,” Freya pleaded. “There is no us. Not in the way I know you want to discuss. There never will be.”

“And yet, here we are. Alone. We always seem to find our way back to one another. Are you going to say no part of you thinks about what we once had and what it could be? I know you feel the same way I do.”

“Of course I do. But Xaden, that still doesn’t change the fact that you’re engaged to be married to someone else. Once Threshing is over, I already know that if we both make it out alive you’ll ask for my help to get you off the grounds undetected so you can see her. And we both know I will help because I am loyal to you as your best friend, which makes it fucking selfish and cruel of you to take the feelings you know I have for you and try to use them to get something you want when I’ve told you being with you in such a way hurts too much. I’m not going to be the second choice.”

Freya pulled her hands away from Xaden and stepped back, hoping that would resonate with him. Hurt flashed through Xaden’s eyes, but it quickly disappeared as he nodded in acceptance.

“I understand,” he spoke softly. “I’ve never wanted you to feel that way, Fern. You’re one of the most important people in my life. If… if I had more say in the matter, maybe things would be different.”

“You could call off the betrothal,” Freya replied fast, without even thinking. Her eyes widened at her abruptness.

“Freya, we both know this was a political agreement between my family and hers. This betrothment was made when we were kids. I can’t change that. Cat turns twenty next year, the least I can do is give her a chance. It’s what my father would’ve wanted.”

“I know and I’m not arguing that. I just- I wasn't thinking. I’m sorry. And you’re right. I’ve never told you this, but that night of the party announcing the allegiance through betrothal, Fen pulled me aside to discuss it in a way.”

“He did?” Xaden asked. “What did he say?”

“That you loved me,” she answered, while Xaden observed her with interest. “He knew that I loved you too, but also how that love was always meant to be platonic. We were put on this earth together to be friends, Xaden. Nothing more. What happened when we were seventeen shouldn’t have happened.”

Xaden stayed silent, then spoke quietly, almost in a whisper.

“Do you regret it happening?”

Freya took a deep breath.

“No, I don’t. And I don’t regret what happened under that tree our first night here either. But it can’t happen again.”

“Ok,” Xaden agreed. “I’m sorry for the pain I’ve caused you, Fern. I’m just selfish, especially when it comes to you. No one will ever be good enough for you. You’re one of the greatest things this world has to offer and I’m so incredibly lucky to have you in my life.”

“I could say the same,” Freya smiled. “Like Caden always used to say and Garrick now always says about us, we’re a package deal. You don’t get one of us without the other.”

“Caden and Garrick know that better than anyone. Poor guys.”

The two best friends laughed, feeling good about their conversation.

Freya shook her head, still smiling, then jumped at the sound of the clock tower tolling in the distance, remembering she had somewhere to be. “Oh, shit, I have to go.”

“Meeting someone?” Xaden casually asked, to which Freya nodded. “Do I know them?”

“Xaden-,” Freya started but was cut off by Xaden’s chuckling again then walked toward the stairs again, becoming less visible in the shadows.

“I’m just messing with you. I’ll be down in the fields if you decide you want better company.”

Freya rolled her eyes.

“Goodnight, Xaden.”

“Goodnight, Freya.”

After one last smirk, Xaden was gone and Freya exhaled before shaking her head again. She didn’t have time to continue processing what she and Xaden discussed so she pushed the thoughts aside and headed back through the courtyard toward the dorms. Nathan was waiting for her.

Freya swiftly made her way past where her fellow first years resided without being detected, but when she reached the dorms, she froze. Nathan hadn’t explained where to go from there.

However, as if on cue, the wind picked up around her, creating a gentle breeze that made her hair dance around her head. Freya knew she wasn’t alone anymore.

“Your party tricks are becoming less impressive the more you use them on me,” Freya said to the darkness she faced, then heard a familiar chuckle behind her. She quickly turned to face where the sound came from.

“Oh, making a breeze is nothing,” Nathan said, then stepped into a small patch of dim moonlight. Freya tried subtly taking in his black clothing, including a tight-fitted t-shirt that emphasized his muscular arms and torso. Based on the smirk Nathan met her with once she made eye contact again, Freya knew she hadn’t been so subtle. “There’s a lot more I can do. The air isn’t an element that should be underestimated.”

Freya raised an eyebrow while she crossed her arms and stepped forward, challenging him.

“Disastrous wind storm capabilities?”

“You have no idea.”

Nathan’s gaze never left Freya’s and before she could respond, the air around them went cold and the wind aggressively picked up. A gasp left Freya’s mouth as she felt an invisible force begin to push her. Had she not known Nathan was an air-wielder, she’d be at a loss for words.

Freya glanced at a nearby bush and the loose pebbles that littered the ground beneath it that were miraculously undisturbed by the wind Nathan was creating. Only she was affected by the attack.

She locked eyes with him again, trying to remain stoic as her hair whipped around and it felt like she could easily be blown away, literally.

“You’re showing off,” Freya said, making Nathan smirk again before the wind started lifting her off the ground. Freya yelped as she frantically tried to grab something that would prevent her from levitating, but it was useless. “Nathan!”

The gust of wind lifted Freya’s legs so that she floated horizontally as she went higher and higher into the air. Once she was about 10 feet off the ground, the wind disappeared completely and she was left freefalling toward the hard earth below. Freya didn’t have it in her to yell, nor did she have the time. Instead, she closed her eyes and braced herself for impact.

She didn’t think Nathan would let her hit the ground and figured he’d stop her with the air in some way. But instead of another invisible force breaking her fall, Freya landed perfectly bridal style in Nathan’s arms while he looked at her like it was nothing to just catch her from such a height.

Freya blinked at him with wide eyes, speechless.

“How was that for a party trick?” Nathan asked, grinning.

“You know,” Freya started, then inhaled deeply to calm her pounding heart. “For a wingleader who could get in a lot of trouble if caught doing a stunt like that with not only a first year but a marked one after curfew, that was pretty impressive.”

“Thanks, I try,” Nathan replied then set Freya down, still grinning. “Hello, Freya.”

“Hello, Nathan,” Freya said, finding his smile infectious as it made her do the same. “How long have you been out here? I hope I didn’t make you wait long.”

“I’ve been out for some time, roaming around until it was time to meet. I wasn’t worried about waiting. You’ve been out for some time too, I saw.”

Freya went stiff.

“W-were you watching me?”

“No, nothing like that,” Nathan assured.

“Then what were you doing?” She asked skeptically. “How’d you know I was already out here?”

Nathan sighed and ran a hand over his face.

“I was out with Foghar, my bonded dragon. As I was returning, I saw Riorson sneaking out of the first-year barracks before following after someone. I quickly realized who he went after was you.”

“Oh. Did you listen to our conversation?”

“No,” he stated firmly. “I wasn’t close enough to hear what the two of you discussed unless I used the wind and had no intention to eavesdrop on your private conversation. You did look briefly upset while you were talking, though.”

“Yeah,” Freya started. “Given how complex mine and Xaden’s relationship is, that tends to happen.”

“You two really have known each other forever, huh? I know you’ve mentioned it before, but still.”

“Our entire lives. It’s a lot to explain.”

“Understandable,” Nathan replied. “He seems to be an important person to you, though. I can respect that. It makes sense that the two of you would butt heads sometimes.”

“He is important to me regardless of how often he gets on my nerves,” Freya nodded, then smirked, “But I didn’t think you wanted to meet this late so we could talk about Xaden.”

Nathan laughed.

“You’re right, I didn’t. The coast is clear, shall we go up to my room?”

“Lead the way.”

Freya stepped forward but stopped when Nathan didn’t move and looked at him questionably. Nathan quirked an eyebrow.

“Oh, did you think we were taking the stairs?” He asked with an amused expression.

“I swear, if you pull some wind bullshit again,” Freya warned, making Nathan chuckle again.

“I’m kidding, follow me.”

“Good. I like my feet on the ground, thanks.”

“Then I think you might be in the wrong quadrant,” Nathan quipped.

“Not everyone had the choice of what quadrant they ended up in,” Freya bit right back, making him grimace.

“Right, uh, well, this way.”

Freya smiled to herself as she followed after him, enjoying the way she made him squirm.

The pair entered the dorms without issue, but Freya kept close to Nathan in case they crossed paths with unwanted company. They stealthily made their way up a set of stairs to the top floor, where a dark hallway met them. Freya could just barely make out the figure of other doorways to bedrooms as they passed them, and soon enough, they were standing in front of the last door on the right. Given how Nathan stopped at it and the door’s lock clicked open without him even touching it, Freya knew they arrived at his room.

Once inside, a single dim mage light near a desk in the far left corner of the room barely illuminated the rest of the space. Freya could see the shape of the various furniture around like a wardrobe, bed and what seemed to be a painting on the wall, but couldn’t discern any of the details that made the room Nathan’s. She couldn’t tell what colour of sheets draped the bed, what items were sprawled over his desk, the image that was framed on the wall or what contents were poking out of and sitting on top of the wardrobe. Apart from the small vicinity around the mage light, including the window behind it that only showed the darkness from outside, Freya was essentially walking into the room blindly. Metaphorically and physically.

She hated it.

However, Freya understood how someone's bedroom was a place of solace. It was a somewhere that whoever inhabited the space, could retreat to for quiet and privacy. Somewhere safe. Living in the barracks for a month and a half with so many other cadets had her craving for a place of solitude she could go to after a long day of classes and training. She knew that she would be weary about who she let into her space had her and Nathan’s roles been reversed.

Despite wishing she could see the characteristics that made Nathan’s room that safe space for him, she understood that him even welcoming her into his room at all spoke volumes about how he trusted her even to be there at all. Maybe one day soon, she’d be able to properly observe those features.

Nathan remained silent as he took off his cloak, placed it over the chair that was near the desk, then stepped toward the bed and sat down. Freya didn’t need the room to be properly lit to know that he was looking at her expectantly to join him, so she did.

Since Nathan was sitting at the end of the bed and closer to the floating mage light, Freya opted to sit closer to the pillows, leaving a safe distance between them and using her cloak as a barrier, holding it on her lap. Still, though, she lifted her right leg and turned so that she’d be facing him.

“So,” Nathan said, finally breaking the silence.

“So,” Freya repeated before lifting her gaze to meet his, noticing how his golden brown eyes seemed to sparkle in the dim lighting. Nathan observed her too, his eyes looking over every inch of her face as if trying to memorize every little detail. “You said you wanted to talk. Are we going to do that, or are you just going to stare at me?”

Nathan chuckled and shook his head.

“Sorry, it’s just- your eyes, Freya. They’re stunning.”

Freya couldn't help the blush burning at her cheeks, wondering if he’d noticed how she studied his eyes too, then quickly looked away.

“Thank you. I’ve been told my eyes are my most beautiful feature.”

“I wouldn’t say the most beautiful,” Nathan replied. “Certainly one of your most beautiful features, yes. But there’s more to your beauty than just that.”

Freya’s gaze snapped back to him and had the room not been so shadowy, she was sure he’d be able to see how beat red her face had become.

“So, uh,” Freya started, clearing her throat as she desperately tried to change the subject. “What did you want to talk about it?”

“Well, to put it simply, you.”

“Me?”

“Yes, you,” Nathan chuckled. “As I’ve said before, you fascinate me, Freya. You’re one of the most captivating people I’ve ever met.”

Freya blushed again before replying. “Oh, uh, well, what would you like to know? I assure you that I’m not that interesting.”

“I find that hard to believe. I want to know as much as you’re willing to share. But, firstly, you were pretty bothered earlier with Tavis knowing that I knew about you and the other marked ones meeting as a group. Did you get the chance to talk to Riorson about it?”

Freya exhaled while dropping her gaze to where she fiddled with the fabric of her cloak between her fingers, then shook her head.

“No, not yet. It’s just, hard. Everything with Xaden is hard.”

Silence fell over them as Nathan observed Freya and she kept her gaze lowered.

“Would you like to talk about it?” Nathan asked after a moment.

Freya looked at him again, then blinked, considering his offer. She’d never had a strong friendship compared to what she had with Xaden and Garrick. Since they were a trio and she adored both of her boys, Xaden wasn’t a topic she’d go to Garrick to discuss. Before the rebellion, she’d talk to Caden about her complicated relationship with Xaden. He was the first to know of Freya and Xaden’s relationship evolving into more, but he never provided his opinion. Instead, he listened to his sister and gave meaningful advice, reminding her that she and Xaden would always be tethered regardless of what happened between them. Despite at times being cryptic with his words, Freya always felt better after talking to Caden. His insight was what she needed when her conflicted feelings mixed with the chaos that was beginning around them.

As she looked at Nathan, she initially felt defensive. She didn’t want to talk about her relationship with Xaden with someone who knew nothing about what they’d been through. But then she felt something that since their first meeting had only gotten stronger. It was his genuineness. Not only did Freya feel like she could trust Nathan, he became someone she wanted to confide in. She felt safe with him.

Slowly, Freya nodded.

“Xaden was my first love,” she stated quietly. “And I still have a lot of love for him, but things have changed. We’ve both changed and have grown up. There was a time in my life when it felt like Xaden was the centre of the universe. In my eyes, he could do no wrong. But, he has. Xaden’s hurt me and I know I’ve hurt him too. That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t die for him, though. My parents and Xaden’s father always said we were part of one another. You couldn’t get one of us without the other. Gods, even my brother said the same thing and they were all right. When I was 17 and we were together, I didn’t realize how much that caused things to change between us. At the time, it seemed like it was right, that it was meant to happen. But now, I don’t know anymore. Xaden and I know each other better than anyone else, but, with being reunited after three years apart, it’s not the same. We’re forming different relationships and growing, but I just can’t let go of the past.”

Nathan’s expression was unreadable.

“What do you mean, exactly?”

“I can’t help but compare the new relationships I’m forming to what I wanted with Xaden. I can’t keep myself from wondering if anyone will ever know me like he does. Or if I’ll ever allow someone to know me on such a personal level. For a long time, I was convinced I wouldn’t. But being here, and meeting the people I have has made me think differently. You’re a big part of that. I feel like I can trust you and that… that you care. You say that I fascinate you, Nathan, but you do the same to me. I like being around you. You give me a sense of ease and peace, which I haven’t allowed myself to find in other people. I’m slowly learning that these significant relationships I’m forming don’t need to be compared to Xaden. They don’t coincide and that’s ok. Sure, you may not view me as anything more than an annoying first-year or a marked one who can’t be trusted, but, I-I like you, Nathan. And that could be meaningless for you to hear, but for me, it’s everything.”

Nathan hung onto every word Freya said and watched as she held his gaze, internally considering if she had shared too much.

“You’re a lot more than that to me.”

Freya’s heart was pounding and Nathan’s voice sounded distant, like an echo she couldn’t fully understand. She hadn’t meant to lay everything out for Nathan, but, once again, her emotions took over. It was scary, but she meant it. However, she still had nagging thoughts that revolved entirely around Xaden and what he might think. Freya knew he was skeptical about Nathan, rightfully so, but she hoped Xaden would be willing to work past that for her sake.

It was all a lot for her to think about, making her stiffen.

Along with Freya’s pounding heart, her mind was racing; distracting her from the present. So when Nathan spoke up again, this time clearer, his voice made her jump.

“Freya, come back to me,” he spoke softly and gently cupped her cheek with his palm. His eyes scanned hers for a split second, watching as they softened upon holding his gaze, and then he smiled. “I thought I was losing you for a second.”

Freya’s eyebrows furrowed at Nathan’s choice of words. What did he mean about losing her? Did she zone out?

However, when she took a deep breath and felt tightness in her chest, Freya realized she was panicking. An attack she hadn’t experienced severely since her parents and Caden were executed, suddenly triggered. It pissed her off.

But as Freya mindlessly leaned against Nathan’s hand, she let herself relax. She wasn’t in imminent danger and all those things racing through her mind could be addressed at another time. All she needed to do was focus on Nathan.

The two of them sat in silence again just looking at each other. No words were exchanged and they didn’t need to be. They both felt content. Freya hoped that feeling would remain and her anxiety didn’t creep back on her. She was naive to think it had gone away so fast.

“May I try something?” Nathan asked after a few moments passed. Freya’s expression became unsure. “But I need you to promise me you’ll say no if you don’t want me to. If you say stop, I will listen.”

Realization dawned on Freya as she saw Nathan glance at her lips, then back to her eyes. He was going to kiss her.

“Nathan,” Freya said, suddenly feeling that nagging again, but she felt something else too. Desire. She wanted to kiss him despite her brain telling her not to and decided to push those thoughts away. “Fuck it.”

Freya leaned forward, closing the small gap between her and Nathan as she crashed her lips against his.

At first, the kiss was soft but soon deepened as Nathan’s hand slid to the back of Freya’s head, gently gripping her hair while his arm snaked around her waist and brought her closer. Before Freya knew it, she was swinging her left leg up and over his lap so she’d be straddling him, not breaking away from the kiss once.

Nathan’s hands started roaming her body. One hand moved to grip her ass while the other slid under her shirt, wandering close to one of her breasts, but opted to rest on her ribs instead. Freya’s left hand tangled into Nathan’s hair at the back of his head, while her right hand cupped the side of his neck. They continued making out, moaning together as Nathan leaned back onto the mattress slowly, bringing Freya with him.

The only noise that filled the room was their pants, moans and the sound of them kissing. They were so caught up in each other, sweat prickling their brows as their want to remove clothing grew more, that they didn’t notice Freya’s cloak sliding off the bed and onto the floor with a thump, making them both jump and pull back from one another.

“What was that?” Nathan asked breathlessly.

“My cloak,” Freya responded, also trying to catch her breath “There’s a dagger in the pocket.”

“Not surprising,” Nathan chuckled, then reached up to gently tuck some of Freya’s hair behind her ear. “You are so beautiful.”

Freya smiled, blushing again as she glanced down at the floor where her cloak lay in a heap, the dagger in her pocket sticking out slightly. Because of the dim lighting, she could barely make out the small X.R. initials engraved on the handle, but seeing them made her freeze.

It was a dagger Xaden had given her and suddenly Freya felt a wave of guilt wash over her.

She didn’t understand why she felt guilty, she’d done nothing wrong. But, she knew Xaden would be upset if he found out she fraternized with their wingleader in a not-so-platonic way. It was a ridiculous thing for her to worry about, but she didn’t want to hurt her best friend. He couldn’t know it happened.

“I have to go,” Freya muttered, then quickly scrambled off Nathan. Her chest was tight again and her heart was pounding.

She was panicking. Why was she panicking?

“Wait, what?” Nathan questioned as he sat up and got off the bed after her. “Why?”

“I just do. This- you’re my wingleader and Xaden-.”

“So this is about Xaden?”

Nathan sounded hurt, and his voice felt like a dagger plummeting into Freya’s heart.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, tears pricking her eyes. “I have to go.”

Freya picked her cloak up off the floor and rushed for the door.

“Freya, wait,” Nathan pleaded from behind her, but Freya didn’t bother looking back as she navigated her way down the dark hallway toward the stairs.

Everything was dark and it was difficult for her to make her way down the steps without falling, but, she still managed to do it.

Freya knew the sound of footsteps following her was Nathan, the way he continued calling her name was evidence of that, but she didn’t care. She wasn’t stopping and didn’t care if anyone heard them either. She just needed to get back to the barracks.

Once at the bottom of the stairs, Freya turned and went down the other hall she remembered leading to the courtyard. She felt a breeze of fresh air, letting her know she was going the right way. Soon enough, she was back outside.

After pausing briefly upon noticing she was in the courtyard again, Freya kept close to the wall so she could remain unseen, but only made it a few steps before a familiar voice spoke up.

“Freya?” Xaden asked from behind her, making Freya stop and turn to face him. “Are you alright? You seem upset.”

“Yeah, uhm, I’m fine,” Freya lied, taking a deep breath. Xaden’s expression showed that he didn’t believe her. “I am, really. I just want to go to bed, Xaden.”

Xaden went to respond, but before he could, footsteps approached and Nathan rounded a corner.

“Freya,” Nathan said, then stopped once he saw the other two.

“What’re you doing here?” Xaden snapped and turned to face Nathan, stepping toward him.

“I could ask you the same thing, first-year.”

Xaden scoffed, then took another step toward Nathan, but couldn’t go any further because Freya rushed over to stand between them.

“Xaden, stop,” Freya said firmly. “Don’t make a scene.”

Xaden stopped and looked at her, relaxing until he glanced at Nathan again and tensed when he realized what happened.

“You were with him, weren’t you? Gods, Freya, the wingleader? Of all people!? You can’t trust him, do you not understand that?”

“You don’t get to choose who I can and can’t trust!”

“Well clearly you need me to,” Xaden stressed, shaking his head. “This could put us all in danger and I guess you’re incapable of realizing that. You’re smarter than this.”

“Oh, don’t you berate me, Xaden,” Freya replied seething. “You are not Caden or my parents. You don’t get to scold me for something you think is wrong, I’m a fucking adult. And don’t talk down on me either. I know the risks of what we’ve been doing and how careful I need to be with who I trust.”

“Really? Because it sure doesn’t seem like it if one of those people is a fucking wingleader! What would you do if he found out?”

Xaden didn’t have to say he was referring to all the marked ones meeting together for Freya to know what he meant. With a deep breath, she answered.

“He knows.”

“What?” Xaden asked, shocked.

“He knows,” Freya repeated. “The first night we all met, Nathan saw. He hasn’t told anyone and I trust he won’t, Xaden. If he does, I will deal with it. But please give him a chance. For me.”

Xaden blinked at her disbelievingly, but that disbelief soon turned into a look of betrayal. Gone was Freya’s best friend. Standing before her was the cold, unapproachable son of the rebellion leader everyone made him out to be.

“Xaden-.”

He didn’t respond. Instead, he met Freya’s gaze once more then turned and started walking away.

Freya stepped after him but stopped and glanced at where Nathan was still standing. Tears welled in her eyes and she quickly shook her head.

“All dragon breeds have different temperaments,” Professor Kaori stated while glancing around the room full of cadets. “It’s important to keep such differences in mind when approaching specific breeds during Threshing.”

“What happens if we approach a certain breed incorrectly?” A female cadet sitting at a table to Freya’s left asked, earning some scoffs from others in their class. Freya exhaled.

“No one has lived to tell the tale,” Kaori replied simply, then nodded toward the centre of the circled table closest to him. Soon enough, an illusion of an Orange Daggertail, much smaller than the actual dragon would be, appeared in the middle of each table. “Orange Dragons are the most unpredictable of the breeds. They are extremely risky. This one here is an Orange willing to bond during Threshing.”

Some cadets shared what they knew about Orange dragons before the image changed to a Brown dragon. Freya wrote down what Kaori said about each breed of dragon despite being well-versed on the topic, having come from a family of riders herself. There was always an opportunity to learn more, Freya thought.

Kaori went on to show a Red dragon and started a discussion on them. Then, eventually, the image changed to a Green Morningstartail, making Freya do a double-take before feeling herself go stiff.

“That’s the Green that was at the citadel on Conscription Day,” someone in the room spoke up, but Freya didn’t bother looking at them. Her focus remained on the illusion of Caden’s dragon displayed before her.

“Correct,” Kaori said. “This particular Green is one of the largest and most cunning of that colour I’ve seen in years. He is of Uaineloidsig lineage, making him remarkably intelligent, and he’s the only known Green Morningstartail that has been in service during the last few decades. That tail of his alone is an incredibly deadly weapon. Factor in the other traits I’ve listed, and it’s easy to assume this is one dragon you don’t want to be on the wrong side of.”

“Is he one of the dragons bonding this year?” A male cadet asked from the other side of the room.

“When was the last time he was in service?” Another cadet questioned from the table next to Freya’s. Still, she didn’t take her eyes off the dragon.

“Dìo hasn’t been in service for three years,” Kaori answered. “It’s unclear if he will be bonding this year. He wasn’t before Conscription Day, but from what I’ve heard, that may change. His last rider was a rebellion leader.”

Several gasps sounded around the room, followed by murmuring as people discussed what they’d just learned.

Freya took a deep breath, trying her best not to let her feelings get to her as she tugged on a loose thread of the material she used to wrap her left wrist. It’d been two weeks since Nolon mended it for her, she had begun sparring again, but her wrist still ached and the wrap helped. Freya made sure no one saw her with the wrap though, and always took it off before Gym. Only people she trusted knew her wrist was still bothering her a bit.

Eventually, Freya moved her gaze from the illusion and glanced at the table to her right. Xaden and Garrick were already looking at her, concern prominent on their faces.

“Do you want to leave?” Xaden mouthed to her.

“We’ll go with you,” Garrick did the same. Freya appreciated their offer but shook her head no.

“I’ll be fine,” she whispered, unintentionally gaining the attention of those sitting at her table. Nova and Bennett looked at her questionably and waited for her to elaborate. Freya sighed. However, another cadet spoke up before she could say anything to them.

“Was he the Green bonded to Caden Tarlor?”

Freya immediately snapped her gaze to the female cadet who asked the question and couldn’t help but glare when she saw it was Amber Mavis. People began muttering and whispering again.

Even before the rebellion, the Tarlor’s were known and respected around Navarre for having so many powerful riders. It didn’t surprise Freya that people knew of her family. However, the rebellion ripped the Tarlor family name to shreds, and Freya carried that burden. Nonetheless, she knew her family best and would always protect them.

“That would make sense with how the only person it seemingly didn’t want to burn at the citadel was Tarlor’s little sister,” Alic, a cadet from Second Wing said. It wasn’t long before all eyes were on Freya.

She glanced around the room at those looking at her, a hard and unreadable expression on her face as her gaze trailed from one end to the other, but Freya stayed silent.

“Everyone, that’s not what this class is about,” Kaori cleared his throat, bringing some attention back to him. “We’re not here to point fingers, we’re here to be educated. Freya, you do not have to comment on the topic.”

“No, I will,” Freya stated, then took a deep breath.

Kaori nodded.

“The Tarlor family has a long lineage of impressive riders. I’m sure many in this class could learn a lot about dragons from you, Freya. The floor is yours.”

Freya remained silent momentarily, considering her words, but straightened her posture once she felt many eyes on her again.

“Thank you, Professor Kaori. I grew up surrounded by dragons. At least one grandparent from each side, three uncles, an aunt, my parents and my older brother were all riders. That being said, I learned how these creatures worked from a distance, as none were mine to associate with. Dìo was my brother’s dragon. If there’s anything I learned from Caden about the greens is that you must never back down from them. A Green will challenge you. If one approaches you, be patient. Show submission as you wait for their approval or else you’ll never be deemed worthy to them.”

“Precisely,” Kaori spoke before anyone else could. “A few greens are willing to bond this year, this is crucial information to know for those approached by one, including Dìo if he does decide to bond.”

“It’s forbidden for a dragon to bond a relative of a past rider, right?” Amber asked, not even looking at Freya or showing that she listened to anything said.

“Typically, yes,” Kaori answered. “However, the dragons have their own system of law. We do not interfere with it.”

“That’s why none of the rebellion dragons were destroyed,” Bennett stated from their spot next to Freya. “Not that they should’ve been. But, it was up to the dragons how the ones who lost rebellion riders and lived through it were punished. The people of Navarre had no part in that.”

“That’s correct,” Kaori replied before the image in the middle of the tables changed to a massive Blue Daggertail. “This is the only Blue that has agreed to bond this year. Her Daggertail makes her one of the rarest types of blues. Would you like to share what you know about the blues, Freya?”

Freya exhaled, then nodded.

“They’re ruthless and intimidating,” she declared. “There is no proper way to approach a Blue. It’s probably best that you don’t. If one chooses you, let them have control over the situation.”

“What makes you such an expert, Tarlor?” Alic sneered. “Why are we listening to a separatist’s kid, anyway?”

Freya took a breath to remain calm. She didn’t know Alic well or much about him other than that he was King Tauri’s middle son. That fact, however, Freya kept to herself. Xaden told her who he was, but she didn’t lead on like he was of any notoriety. To her, he was just a pompous asshole and a bully.

“The Vale lost two blue dragons following the rebellion. They were a mated pair. The male was a Daggertail, the female a Scorpiontail. Their bonded riders were my parents. However, the dragons didn’t die during the rebellion. It was after. My father’s dragon, the Scorpiontail, died within 24 hours of my family’s execution. The Daggertail fell soon after.”

After her spiel, Freya glanced at Xaden. Had he not shared everything he knew about what happened to her parents’ dragons with her, she probably wouldn’t have a better understanding of just how strong the bond between dragon and human could be.

“This is a significant example of the strength of a rider’s and mated pair bonds,” Kaori took over. “We all know if a dragon dies, so will its rider. However, occasionally, a rider’s death causes a dragon’s demise. This doesn’t always happen, though. A mated pair of dragons bonded to a married couple is a perfect situation on paper. However, as unfortunate as it is, if one falls it’s likely they all will.”

Murmurs erupted from around the room, but otherwise, class carried on. Freya noticed the way some cadets continued looking at her as if they were studying her. Others would speak quietly to someone beside them, and then both would glance in Freya’s direction.

Despite her calm and reserved exterior for the remainder of the lecture, Freya felt the opposite internally. She didn’t mind sharing what she knew about dragons and was aware that confidently doing so showed the other cadets she was educated on the topic. However, everyone knowing about Caden’s dragon had her on edge. Freya knew she’d have to be on high alert going forward.

Once the bell tolled and the class was dismissed, Freya already had her things gathered and was one of the first up from her desk. However, she didn’t even reach the door before she was stopped.

“Freya, do you mind staying back for a moment?” Kaori asked just as she was about to put her hand on the doorknob.

“Uhm, yeah I can do that,” Freya replied awkwardly as she adjusted the strap of her satchel on her shoulder. She received some looks from other cadets as they passed by her to leave, and then her eyes landed on her two guys as they approached. “You two go. I’ll see you at Lunch. I know you both want to wait, but you should go.”

“Freya,” Xaden immediately started protesting. “Don’t do this.”

“Do what?”

“Push us away.”

Freya blinked at him surprised. Was that what she was doing?

“That class wasn’t easy, Fern,” Xaden justified. “Are you okay?”

“I will be,” Freya responded, then exhaled. “I appreciate you checking in and worrying, Xaden. But, Kaori just wants to talk to me. I’ll be fine.”

“She’s right,” Garrick spoke up. “Nothing bad will happen, Xaden. We’ll see you soon, Fray.”

With that, Garrick started pulling Xaden toward the door. Freya mouthed a quick thank you to him, he understood that there were some things she wanted to do on her own without them. Then she looked at Xaden and nodded, sending him a reassuring smile before Garrick got him out the door.

Once the door closed, Freya moved her gaze to the right and saw Nova and Bennett waiting nearby.

“We’ll wait for you,” Nova said. “If that’s ok.”

“Sounds good,” Freya replied, smiling. She felt she could spend some time with them before spending lunch with Xaden and Garrick.

Once the room was clear, Freya took a deep breath and approached Kaori’s desk.

“You wanted to speak with me, Professor?”

“Yes,” he said and leaned against his desk. “I wanted to thank you for your contribution to today's lecture.”

“Oh, it was nothing,” Freya replied. “I’ve learned a lot about dragons over the years, I was just sharing what I knew.”

“There are cadets here that could learn a lot from you. Given who your family is, it’s no surprise you’re as knowledgable as you are.”

“Yeah, unfortunately, who my family is makes my time here a lot more difficult than it originally could’ve been, though.”

“Not necessarily,” Kaori stated. “The members of your family were some of the greatest riders Navarre has ever seen. Your parents were well-respected and powerful. Your brother, Caden, was of the same calibre.”

“And we all know how that ended up for them,” Freya said, then dropped her gaze as she fiddled with the wrap on her wrist again.

“Your parents and Caden were good people, Freya. I know the rebellion makes that hard for a lot of people to believe, but it doesn’t change all the good they did before. Your parents were incredible leaders, they helped a lot of people. Your brother was just like them and saved so many people being the mender he was. I see a lot of all three of them in you. I’m not the only one who does either”

Freya was speechless and shook her head as she processed what was said to her.

“It’s not too often I hear compliments about my family nowadays.”

“I can see why that may be,” Kaori explained. “The rebellion is a touchy subject to many, but it doesn’t change everything that came before it.”

“I guess you’re right,” Freya nodded in agreement. “Thank you, Professor.”

“The pleasure has been all mine, Freya. Now go enjoy your lunch.”

With that, Freya nodded and went on her way. She joined Nova and Bennett again, and then the three of them exited into the hallway.

“So, that was interesting,” Bennett was the first to break the silence between the three of them.

“I didn’t realize that Green from Conscription Day was your brother’s dragon,” Nova said as she glanced to where Freya walked between her and Bennett.

“Yeah, it was,” Freya responded softly.

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I didn’t think it was a detail everyone needed to know. Kind of like how you decided not to tell us about your brother.”

There was an unintentionally hostile tone to Freya’s voice and her eyes widened as soon as the words left her mouth. She didn’t mean to snap at Nova. Following what happened after Freya had her wrist mended and she learned that Nova and Nathan were siblings, the two girls were fine. The next day they talked it through and Freya understood where Nova was coming from with not wanting people to know her brother was a wingleader as it brought unwanted attention. Nova took a few days after that to feel she trusted Bennett enough to share, which was also a feeling Freya knew all too well.

Freya had no harsh feelings toward her friend, but the weight of what happened during class had finally caught up to her.

“Nova, I’m sorry,” Freya apologized. “That was uncalled for.”

“I appreciate the apology,” Nova responded. “It’s alright, though. That class put a lot of strain on you.”

“It’s not alright. Yes, that lecture sucked, but it’s not your fault and I shouldn’t take it out on you just because I’m frustrated.”

Nova nodded, showing appreciation for Freya’s words as they rounded a corner.

“Speaking of Nathan, have you talked to him?”

“Not a chance,” Freya stated. “I have nothing to say to him.”

“Right, you just stare at him longingly whenever he’s near,” Bennett remarked, making Freya scoff.

“I do not!”

“If it’s not my brother, she’s busy looking at Xaden,” Nova teased then nudged Freya with her shoulder. “You should talk to him, though.”

“Are you saying that as Nathan’s sister or as my friend?” Freya asked skeptically.

Nova shrugged.

“Maybe it’s both.”

Freya shook her head in response and remained silent as they entered the gathering hall. It didn’t take long for her gaze to fall on Xaden and Garrick sitting at their usual table.

“We’ll see you in Gym?’ Bennett asked, regaining Freya’s attention.

“Oh, yeah,” Freya replied. “See you two later.”

The other two went to grab a table together while Freya went up to get her lunch. She always sat with her guys during meals, which Nova and Bennett never tried to interfere with.

There wasn’t much of a line to get food seeing as most cadets had already been served their lunch, which Freya didn’t mind since she was getting rather hungry. After she had her food, Freya went to turn around and make her way to sit with Xaden and Garrick but accidentally ran into someone in the process.

“Sorry,” Freya gasped as she quickly tried to prevent anything from falling off her tray without looking up at the person standing in front of her. “I wasn’t looking where I was going.”

“It’s alright, Freya,” the man spoke, making Freya’s breath hitch as her gaze shot upward and met a familiar pair of golden brown eyes. Nathan looked back at her with an unreadable expression until his eyes flickered down to where her left hand was holding the apple that almost fell off her tray. “Your wrist is still wrapped.”

“Yeah, it is,” she grumbled and swiftly tugged down the sleeve of her shirt so the wrap wouldn’t be seen by anyone else.

“Does it still hurt?”

“Why do you care? I thought I asked you to leave me alone.”

“It was just a question,” Nathan replied simply.

“Whatever,” Freya told him then went to walk around him and continue towards the table, but Nathan stopped her by gently grabbing her arm. Freya immediately tightened her jaw and turned to face him again. “You’re not going to make a scene here in front of everyone, are you?”

“No, I’m not.”

“Then what do you want?”

Nathan inhaled deeply.

“Meet me tonight after curfew,” he started. “Just after curfew. By the bottom of the steps under the citadel.”

“What makes you-,” Freya went to reply but stopped herself when Nathan turned away from her and walked away. She stood there watching him go, glaring at his back for a moment before continuing on her way. As she walked, Freya glanced over at where Nova and Bennett sat and didn’t miss how Nova bit down on her bottom lip to keep herself from grinning too wide, obviously entertained by the interaction she just watched. Freya just shook her head then set her tray on the table and stepped over the bench to sit across from Xaden, next to Garrick. “Hey.”

“Hey, how was talking to Kaori?” Garrick asked.

“It was fine,” Freya replied then took a bite out of her sandwich. “He thanked me for my part in the lecture. What are you two talking about?”

Neither of them noticed her run-in with Nathan, and Freya wanted to keep their topic of conversation off of that if she could.

“A few things,” Xaden said and lowered his voice. “Today is our first real day of challenges. While I was out last night, I was wandering the halls where the professors meet; I saw a list posted. It was all of today’s matchups for sparring.”

“Wait, it’s not random?” Freya asked, confused. “I mean, I guess I shouldn’t say I’m surprised.”

“It’s probably a way for them to weed people out and show the weak ones,” Garrick explained.

“Did you see who we were against?” She questioned.

“Yeah,” Xaden answered. “Garrick is against a guy from First Wing.”

“What about us?”

“Each other.”

Freya’s eyes widened.

“Oh,” she said, then let her gaze fall to her tray.

“Fern, I’m not going to hurt you,” Xaden stated. “I would never.”

“I know that, Xaden. It’s just- it feels like a setup. Everyone knows who we are and who our parents were. It’s like they’re trying to send a message by putting us against each other on the first day. If a list was posted, it’s been decided that we’d be opponents for some time now.”

“I feel like it’s impossible to get any type of leverage in this place,” Garrick groaned. “We feel like we’re one step ahead only to be pushed two steps back all because of these relics. Two other marked ones are against each other too.”

Freya glanced at her friend and nodded, completely understanding how he felt. Then she started thinking about something the three of them discussed a few days prior.

“I think we need to do what I suggested the other night,” she started. “A meeting or something similar with all of us. Marked ones. We lost Warner the other day because of pure negligence. It could’ve been avoided. Some of those here with us don’t know what we know about dragons or combat and could use our help. You’re responsible for all of us, Xaden. I know it’s risky, but we have to do something. We need to look out for our own.”

Xaden observed Freya as she spoke and when her green eyes met his dark ones after she finished talking, he nodded.

“You’re right,” he responded. “I like your idea of a meeting. It’d have to be after curfew because if we get caught, it won’t be good. I don’t know where, though.”

“What about under the citadel?” Garrick suggested. “Down in the valley by the river. It’s not too far and if we give proper directions, I don’t think anyone would get lost. When we were down there yesterday I noticed a massive boulder and some oak trees around a bend. Those trees would be good for coverage if we thought someone was coming. What about there?”

Freya and Xaden immediately looked at each other again. They both knew what trees and boulder Garrick was referring to, it was where the two of them had met during their first night at Basgiath. Freya couldn’t help but think of what happened the last time she and Xaden were there but shook her head so she could stay focused on the topic.

“I think that could work,” Freya agreed. “But when? It should probably be sooner than later with today being our first day of challenges. Gauntlet Training is going to come up quickly too.”

“I think tonight,” Xaden replied.

~*~

“You ready?” Garrick asked as Freya handed him the last of the four daggers she had crossed the parapet with. Xaden had done the same. They weren’t going to use any weapons against each other during their sparring match.

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” Freya responded, then glanced at the crowd gathering around the mat. She and Xaden gained a bit of an audience of other cadets and riders wanting to watch the showdown between two marked ones.

“You’ll be fine, Fray.”

“Tarlor and Riorson, go ahead,” Professor Emetterio spoke up, then nodded at the two to get into position.

“Here we go,” Xaden muttered then turned so he could lead the way onto the mat.

With a deep breath, Freya followed Xaden then stopped and got into a fighting stance when he turned to face her again. This wasn’t the first time the two of them sparred against one other. Growing up, they play-fought and trained together all the time. Where Xaden was larger and stronger, Freya made up for it with her speed and agility. She was an extremely skilled fighter, but so was Xaden and they knew each other's moves.

Murmurs and whispers sounded from those closely watching them, but Freya kept her gaze on her best friend, easily blocking them out. She was about to attack first but then noticed Xaden glancing down at her left wrist, which was unwrapped so it wouldn’t seem like it was still bothering her to those watching. It was a quick and subtle glance, but Freya didn’t miss it and she knew he was already planning on being mindful of her injury.

“Don’t go easy on me now, Riorson,” she said, then smirked when Xaden shook his head.

“Have I ever gone easy on you?” He asked, quirking an eyebrow at her.

Freya chuckled.

“No, but I won our last matchup. I’m expecting you to want this one back.”

“That’s true. Let’s see if there’s anything new you’ve learned over the last three years.”

With that, Xaden took the first swing. Freya dodged it by crouching out of the way but didn’t miss how close he’d gotten to almost making contact when a whoosh sounded above her head. She felt her French braid hit her back, falling with her sudden movement and immediately regretted not braiding her hair into a crown. Although she knew her long hair didn’t matter while in combat against her best friend, Freya got very annoyed when it got in her way.

Although it felt longer, only a few seconds had gone by since Xaden struck first and Freya used her crouching position to her advantage by kicking her left leg out and trying to sweep his feet out from under him. Xaden lept over the attack with ease.

“Going to have to be quicker than that,” Xaden taunted, a smug smile tugging at his mouth.

“Oh, I’m just getting started,” Freya replied as she stood straight, then took a quick breath before charging at him. She started with a series of punches, which Xaden mostly dodged or blocked, but she still managed to get a few good hits in.

Xaden began retaliating and Freya was finding it gradually more difficult to keep up with his fast and calculated moves. She knew she had to do something to knock him down a peg and quickly. After she dodged another one of his kicks, Xaden swung at her with his right fist. Freya reacted by reaching across in front of her body and grabbing his wrist with her right hand to prevent him from making any contact. She then spun to her left and brought her knee up as she completed an almost 360-degree spin, quickly because she was taking no chances having her back to Xaden for long, before extending her leg and kicking him firmly in the chest.

Freya let go of Xaden’s wrist and watched as he stumbled backward, the wind knocked out of him, before he stopped and looked at her with wide eyes then shook his head.

“Nice move,” he said then charged at her again.

“Thanks,” Freya replied then blocked another one of his hits.

The two of them continued battling for a few moments making it evident to everyone watching that they weren’t only great fighters, but also evenly matched against one another. Freya could feel herself growing tired, but she knew she had to keep going. She got another good kick on Xaden’s exposed side as he blocked her incoming fist, then responded by faking a right hook toward her. Freya ducked out of the way again without realizing he had no intention of hitting her, which was what Xaden wanted. Instead of completing a punch, he ducked too and swiftly landed the same move she had tried on him earlier, sweeping her feet out from beneath her with his leg and watching as she fell back onto the mat.

Freya groaned at the impact but had to quickly recollect herself because Xaden was already coming at her again. She rolled out of the way of his attack, but he didn’t let her get very far. He grabbed her leg and pulled her back toward him then climbed over her into a straddling position so he could reach for her left arm and twist it behind her back. Freya inhaled sharply at the searing pain that came from where Xaden gripped her previously broken wrist, making him freeze slightly. He immediately let go of her wrist and debated his next move while Freya took the opportunity to roll onto her back and bring her knee to his groin area.

Xaden’s face scrunched in pain as he fell forward but prevented himself from landing on Freya by placing his hands next to her shoulders on the mat, holding himself mere inches above her.

“Finish this, Freya,” he whispered to her, only loud enough that she could hear. Freya looked at him like he was crazy for saying such a thing, but the hard gaze coming from those onyx eyes told her that he meant business. “Now.”

Without another thought, she wrapped her hands around the elbow of Xaden’s right arm and pulled to bring his shoulder crashing down to the mat. Freya then raised her left knee again, lifting his right thigh and continued pulling at his elbow. The move allowed her to roll the two of them over so that she could be the one straddling him instead.

Once on top of her best friend, Freya elbowed his gut, not too hard, mainly for show and Xaden played along. He groaned in fake pain rather convincingly, but Freya knew better. Still, she wasted no time pinning his arms down to the mat, his arms bent so that his hands were next to his shoulders, then stopped and Xaden didn’t fight back.

The two of them stared at each other, both panting as they tried to catch their breath. Their fight was over.

“What a show,” Emetterio stated and loudly clapped his hands together. “Now that, right there, are two of the best fighters I’ve seen so far in this group of cadets. The rest of you could learn a lot from what you just watched. Next up we have-.”

Emetterio continued talking, but Freya and Xaden’s eyes were still on each other. Freya let go of Xaden’s wrists and let her arms fall to her sides as she took another deep breath. Xaden did the same, and Freya felt tingles when his hands brushed her thighs in the process. Her heart started to race when his right hand didn’t move from where he placed it just above her left knee, then squeezed it, making Freya blush slightly.

“Why did you let me win?” Freya whispered before climbing off of Xaden, then held out her hand to help him up too. She needed to no longer be in the position of straddling his waist.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Xaden replied with a smirk as he took her hand and they both stood.

“I can’t stand you sometimes.”

“We both know that’s a lie.”

Freya rolled her eyes as Xaden nudged her with his shoulder then let him lead the way as they headed off the mat back to where Garrick was waiting for them. After taking a few steps, Freya looked up at everyone who was still watching them for the first time since her match with Xaden began. The way people were looking at her ranged from awe to glares of envy, but she was unphased until her gaze met a familiar pair of eyes observing her intently from within the crowd. It was Nathan.

The two of them held each other’s gaze as Freya continued making her way off the mat until she brushed shoulders with Nova, who was next up sparring against a male cadet.

“The tension between you two,” Nova muttered so that only Freya could hear, making her freeze.

“Me and Xaden?” Freya asked and stood with Nova as the male cadet stretched, then glanced toward Nathan again, who was talking to Finn. “Or…”

“Both of them.”

“Oh.”

Nova chuckled.

“I think if I had to pick a team out of the two, you know who I’d have to be loyal to,” she teased, making Freya roll her eyes again. “But Xaden seems alright too and is your best friend so I can respect it.”

“Good thing it doesn’t matter because there’s nothing like that with either of them,” Freya grumbled.

“Sure, Freya. Real convincing.”

Freya’s mouth fell open in shock at that response, which made Nova laugh again. However, before Freya could say anything, Nova’s opponent spoke up.

“Are you two done talking?” He asked. “This matchup is already going to be a waste of my time with how easy it’ll be. Let's get it over with.”

Freya raised her eyebrows, surprised at his words, then looked at Nova again.

“Embarrass him.”

“Oh, I will,” Nova replied simply, then stepped further onto the mat while Freya walked off.

Once off the mat, she was met with Garrick looking at her with an amused expression as he handed her daggers back.

“Say nothing,” she hissed, knowing his amusement was because of what happened between her and Xaden on the mat.

“I’m not saying anything,” he chuckled, then winked at her. “But that was something.”

“I hope you lose your matchup.”

“I won’t.”

Freya huffed in annoyance, which made Garrick laugh even more. A moment later, Xaden joined them, coming back from wherever he’d gone off, and then they all turned to watch Nova make a complete fool out of her opponent.

~*~

Later that night, Freya was lying awake in bed, trying to get her timing right. It was maybe half an hour after curfew, and she’d told Amira, whom she’d gotten to know better since meeting on Assessment Day and the other female marked ones about meeting in the valley below the citadel an hour after curfew. Xaden and Garrick were taking care of telling the boys. Freya didn’t get the chance to tell the girls what the meeting was for, but when she explained it was just marked ones, they seemed less hesitant to take part, seemingly comforted by the thought that it was all people like them. It made Freya happy because that’s what the meeting was for, so they could all help one another.

However, Nathan was waiting for her to talk, and she somehow needed to ensure that didn’t crossover with the illegal meeting of all the marked ones she helped plan.

With a deep breath, Freya sat up and quietly put her boots on. She slipped Caden’s dagger into her left boot once it was tied, always having it on hand in case she needed it, then grabbed her cloak to throw on. Her movements were quick and stealthy, and she thought she was in the clear to start sneaking out until a whisper sounded from nearby.

“Tell Nathan I said hi,” Nova said from where she lay in her bunk. Freya immediately whipped around to look in her direction, and even though she couldn’t see through the dark, she was sure Nova was smiling.

“He told you we were meeting?” Freya asked, keeping her voice low.

“No, but I saw the two of you talk at lunch and figured that might be why you’re sneaking out after curfew again. Seems like your thing when it comes to him and Xaden.”

“I’m not going to entertain what you’re implying because we’re just going to talk.”

“I’m not implying anything. You’re assuming I am,” Nova countered. “Either way, please go easy on him, Freya. I may sound biased in saying this, but he means well. He doesn’t let people in easily, but with you, he’s different. I don’t know what that means yet or why that’s the case, but regardless, he’s a good guy, and you bring something out of him I haven’t seen in a long time.”

Freya couldn’t help but smile at Nova’s words but quickly shook her head so she didn’t read too much into anything.

“If I thought he had any ill intent, I wouldn’t be sneaking out to meet up with him,” she stated. “But I should get going. I’ve already made him wait longer than I intended to.”

“I expect to hear all about it tomorrow.”

Freya shook her head again, smiling as she finished putting her cloak on, then quickly and quietly snuck out of the dorms.

She snuck through the courtyard and down the steps with ease. She’d gotten quite good at making her way around after curfew without getting caught but remained on high alert because she never knew who also might be out.

The moon was bright, which helped illuminate Freya’s path, but it was incredibly hot. She regretted wearing something as heavy as her cloak, but the cloak was needed when it came to blending in with her dark surroundings and concealing her identity.

Once she reached the bottom of the steps into the valley, Freya looked around for a sign of Nathan being nearby but didn’t see anyone. She took a few more steps, still not seeing anything that indicated he might be there and thought that maybe he got tired of waiting for her and left. However, Freya was soon met by a strong breeze that blew the hood of her cloak down and whipped her hair around which she knew had to be caused by Nathan and his signet.

“I wasn’t sure you were going to show,” he said, then stepped out from the shadows, also wearing a cloak.

“I debated not coming,” Freya replied. “But you didn’t leave me much of a choice.”

Nathan’s eyebrows furrowed at that.

“You always have a choice with me, Freya. After the last time we talked, I wouldn’t have blamed you for still not wanting anything to do with me.”

Freya inhaled deeply, then exhaled.

“Everyone has their reasons to keep secrets and just because that happens doesn’t mean it’s despite anyone else. Sometimes it’s out of care and respect for someone or something and there’s no intended maliciousness. In your case, you were protecting your little sister and not wanting to put a target on her back. I can respect that. You and I don’t really know each other, Nathan, and I wasn’t entitled to know such a thing. However, now that I do know, I have no intention to betray Nova’s trust or friendship. I haven’t told anyone.”

“Not even Riorson or Tavis?” Nathan asked.

“No, not even them,” Freya explained. “It’s not for me to tell and although I trust those two with my life, it’s not something they need to hear from me.”

“You’ve got a pretty interesting perspective on secrets, I must say.”

Freya shrugged.

“Secrets are nothing new to me. As much as they can hurt sometimes, there’s often a bigger picture to look at when they come to the surface. The truth can be more painful. There’s a difference between flat-out lying and withholding information that could shake someone's world. The only downfall is that secrets rarely stay hidden forever. They usually come out and a lot of the time, it would’ve been easier if there was no secret-keeping in the first place.”

Nathan nodded in understanding, then stepped toward her. “You sound like you’re speaking from experience. Not that I’m prying, just an observation.”

“Yeah,” Freya started. “When you have a family that took part in a rebellion, that tends to happen.”

“Right.”

“Now, why is it you wanted me to meet you out here?”

Nathan’s gaze fell to the ground briefly, but he quickly recomposed himself and looked back at Freya, his eyes seemingly sparkling in the moonlight.

“I was hoping we could talk,” he told her.

“About anything in particular?” Freya questioned.

“Not really. I just missed talking with you. You’re good company, Freya.”

Freya couldn’t help but smile at his words because although they’d only just met the day before their fight, she enjoyed his company too and had also missed talking to him. There was just something gravitating about Nathan that continued pulling her no matter how hard she tried to ignore it.

“Lead the way and let’s talk.”

With that, Nathan nodded again, then turned and started walking toward the nearby river. Freya followed and soon fell in step with him as the bell tower tolled in the distance, indicating the start of a new hour.

“You were incredible on the mat today,” Nathan said after a few moments of walking in silence. “I wasn’t expecting to see such a good matchup between two first years.”

“Thanks,” Freya responded. “Xaden and I have been sparring with each other our entire lives so that also wasn’t anything new.”

“The two of you grew up together?”

“Yeah, we’re both from Aretia. My parents and his father were very close friends before we were born, which led to us becoming inseparable. He’s my best friend. I don’t know life without him.”

In the moonlight, Freya was able to see how Nathan’s jaw stiffened as she talked about how fond she was of Xaden.

“I see,” he uttered bitterly without making eye contact with her, which made her smirk. He was jealous, that much was evident and Freya wanted to teasingly call him out on it. However, she noticed they were approaching the bend that led to the trees the marled ones would be meeting under soon. Her eyes widened in realization and she knew she quickly had to wrap their conversation up and prevent him from seeing the others. “Riorson’s lucky to have you in his corner.”

Freya racked her brain for things she could say that would potentially make him want to stop talking to her but hated the idea of pushing him away. She enjoyed being with him, but she couldn’t risk him finding out about her and all of the marked ones meeting when it was her idea to do it in the first place. She had to protect her own.

“Is that jealousy I hear?” Freya asked, not knowing what else she could end their conversation without changing the topic entirely. Maybe if she called him out, he’d get angry and leave. “Because it sounds like you might be jealous, Nathan.”

At that, Nathan stopped and turned to face her.

“Maybe I am. Like I’ve said before, there’s something about you. I can’t say I’m too thrilled about another guy having so much of your attention when I want it. I want to get to know you, Freya. I wasn’t lying when I said you fascinate me.”

Freya blinked in surprise. That was not what she was expecting him to say, but his words made her feel endeared. She liked him too.

“Nathan, I-,” Freya started but cut herself off when the wind picked up again and Nathan’s posture went stiff. “What is it?”

“Someone’s coming,” he stated, then grabbed Freya’s hand and started leading her toward a nearby tree to hide behind. “Come on.”

Freya didn’t ask questions and followed his lead, not speaking again until they were behind the tree.

“Do you know who it is?”

“No, but they're coming from various directions. There’s more than one.”

It wasn’t until then Freya noticed she was still holding Nathan’s hand and she gulped as she let go of it, then turned to face him. Nervousness took over her because either he’d soon see the marked one's meeting, or they’d be met by others who may not be so forgiving seeing the two of them out after curfew together.

“Nathan, we should go,” she said in a shaky whisper. She didn’t want to lie to him, but she had to do something.

“Hey, I’m not going to let them see you,” he assured, then reached up to delicately tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, just like Xaden always did. The gesture made Freya feel like her stomach did a flip and suddenly she felt even more guilty for not being honest with him. “I promise.”

“I believe you but-.”

Before she could finish her sentence, two voices became clearer in the distance and her heart dropped at whose voices they were. A moment later, Xaden and Garrick came into view. Nathan watched them looking puzzled.

“Is that your friends?”

“Y-yes,” Freya stammered, then watched her two best friends walk by. After they were a bit further away, she looked up at Nathan and saw that his expression hardened.

“Did you tell them we were meeting?” He asked, his voice much colder than it had been moments prior. “Is this some sort of setup?”

“No, I didn’t! I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“Then why are they talking about where you are?”

Freya took a shaky breath. Although she couldn’t make out Xaden and Garrick’s conversation, she knew Nathan could because of the wind. She worried about what would happen if he saw the others.

“They’re waiting for me,” she admitted.

“Did you agree to meet with me hoping you’d get information just to take back to them?” Nathan questioned.

“It isn’t like that! You have to believe me.”

“Then what is it like, Freya?”

“Watch and you’ll see,” she whispered, hoping she’d be able to do damage control when he saw what was about to happen.

Gradually, pairs of more cloaked figures made their way past where Nathan and Freya were hiding. They all made their way toward where Xaden and Garrick had gone and in the distance, Freya could see them gathering under that one tree. There were eight of them, she was the ninth. After a few moments, she spoke up again.

“Nathan-.”

“They’re all marked ones,” Nathan replied, his tone still cold and firm. Gone was the guy she wanted to get to know better, suddenly replaced with a harsh wingleader again. “This needs to be reported, what they’re doing is illegal.”

He went to step around Freya, but she quickly stepped in front of him and shook her head.

“I can’t let you do that.”

“What do you mean you can’t, are you defending those people?”

“You’re seeming to forget that I am one of ‘those people,’” Freya replied firmly. Something about the way she referred to the marked ones as ‘those people’ rubbed her the wrong way and it showed.

“Freya, I didn’t mean it like that,” Nathan explained, picking up on how her demeanour changed.

“Then what did you mean? Because to me, it seems you’re just like everyone else here thinking we should be treated differently because of the relics we have. That our families getting executed in front of our eyes wasn’t enough. We still pose a major threat for what they did.”

“No, I don’t think that at all. You and the other marked ones have been painted so poorly to the rest of Navarre since the rebellion ended. I’m not saying that makes it ok or that I agree with how you get treated because of your family’s part in it all, but it’s been ingrained in our minds. I’m sorry. I was just caught off guard.”

“I believe you,” Freya replied because she did believe him. She didn’t think he meant her any harm because of her relic. “I promise we’re not doing anything bad. I know we’re not supposed to meet because Melgren can’t see the outcome when we do, but the reason we’re meeting is so we can help one another. Whether that be with studying or in combat, these people are my own and I want them to make it through this college. I owe it to them to watch out for and help them where I can. The odds are already so stacked against us, it’s the least I can do.”

Nathan watched her intently, then shook his head, making her heart drop once again.

“Nathan, please keep this secret to yourself. I know that’s asking for a lot from a wingleader and at the end of the day, it’d make sense for you to report this, but I really hope you don’t. You’re not like the others here. I feel like I can trust you. But if it comes down to it, I will take the fall to protect everyone standing over there when it comes to this. It was my idea that we meet up in secret, no one else’s. Xaden, Garrick and I worked together to make it happen, but I was the one who suggested it. Please, Nathan.”

“I won’t say anything,” Nathan responded after a moment of silence, making Freya let out a sigh of relief. “What you’re doing is admirable, Freya. I believe what you’re saying.”

“Thank you, thank you. I just- I need to look out for them.”

“I understand, and there’s no need to thank me. I can hear them talking right now and it’s lining up with everything you’ve said. You should go, though. They’re waiting for you.”

Freya smiled and nodded, not being able to help the tears welling in her eyes at how sweet and understanding Nathan was being. He didn’t have to be, but she greatly appreciated it and had a gut feeling she wouldn’t regret trusting him. Without giving her next actions a second thought, she stepped closer to him, linked their hands together again then stood on her tip-toes to place a peck on his cheek.

“Thank you,” she said again, then moved back and put her hood up again. “Goodnight, Nathan.”

“Goodnight, Freya,” he replied, then watched her run off toward the others.

Despite hearing footsteps approaching, Freya kept her eyes closed. There was a searing pain coming from her broken left wrist, but she was comfortable from where she lay on one of the beds in the medical quadrant. Peaceful even. She could’ve easily let herself fall asleep given how exhausted she was.

“Nathan?” A female asked, causing Freya’s eyes to shoot open. She glanced to her right and saw a girl with long dark auburn hair, dressed in a scribe robe, where she stood in the large aisle between the rows of beds. The girl had her back to Freya and was talking to a man whose face Freya couldn’t see from where she was lying. The man was taller than the girl, but Freya could only see some of the brown curls that adorned the top of his head. However, she had a gut feeling she knew who he was. “What are you doing here? Are you hurt?”

“No, I’m alright,” Nathan replied. Yup, it was the wingleader. “I’m here to visit someone. How come you’re here?”

“My job,” the girl replied, holding up one of the scrolls she had in her hand. “Collecting the names for the death roll. You know how it is.”

“Of course.”

“How’s Nova?”

Nova? Freya’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. How did this scribe seem to know Nathan and why did she care about Nova? Then it hit her. Nova said she had an older sister who was a scribe, maybe this was her and she knew Nova was part of Nathan’s wing somehow. Still, that didn’t quite explain how they knew each other unless they had a history.

“She’s good,” Nathan replied with a soft, playful tone to his voice. “Kicking ass, Gemma. She’s so good.”

“Just like we knew she would,” the girl, who Freya assumed was Gemma, said. Freya felt even more confused. “Anyway, I should head back to the archives now, we’ll talk soon.”

“For sure. See you, Gem.”

Freya watched as Gemma reached up to squeeze Nathan’s arm, then moved to walk around him. Acting fast, Freya closed her eyes again and faced the ceiling, hoping she could pretend to be asleep rather than see what Nathan was there for. She knew his being there had to do with her but figured this could help avoid a conversation she didn’t want to have.

Footsteps resumed approaching and Freya could soon feel a presence beside her bed. Still, she kept her eyes shut.

“She’s awake,” a voice Freya recognized as Urvi, the female healer helping with her wrist until Nolon was available to mend it, spoke up from nearby. “Freya, you’re not fooling anyone. I saw you eavesdropping.”

Freya’s eyes shot open again and she quickly narrowed her gaze on Urvi, who was two beds to the left, changing the sheets for the next patient to use. “Thanks, Urvi.”

Sarcasm dripped from Freya’s tone, but Urvi shrugged it off and finished making the bed with an amused expression. Freya shook her head as she watched, then took a deep breath before looking at Nathan.

“I see even a broken wrist still isn’t enough to knock you down a few pegs,” Nathan said, then smirked. Freya just rolled her eyes.

“Why are you here?” She asked, annoyed, then moved to sit up, letting out a cry of agony when immense pain rippled through her again. “Fuck!”

“I told you not to move your wrist!” Urvi scolded, then rushed over to help Freya sit up properly. “You should be lying down. But, I’m gathering you’ll do what you want anyway, so what does anything I have to say matter? Are you sure you don’t want something for the pain? I can go get Winifred.”

“No, it’s alright. I’ll wait. Thank you, though.”

“And when it’s time to be mended are you going to be less stubborn?”

“Probably not,” Freya admitted, a smile tugging at her lips.

Urvi rolled her eyes but still nodded, then walked away, leaving the other two alone.

“Why aren’t you taking anything for the pain?” Nathan asked. Freya looked at him again and was surprised to see a confused but also concerned expression on his face.

“Leigheas serum distorts one's ability to communicate,” she told him with a shrug. “I know that’s what they give for pain relief and figured I’d just wait to take it until Nolon was available to mend my wrist. Didn’t want to be slurring my words while I waited. The pain is… manageable.”

Nathan shook his head.

“You’re something else.”

“And you still haven’t told me why you’re here.”

“You’re right,” Nathan sighed, then glanced at the space next to Freya’s leg on the mattress. “May I sit?”

Freya’s eyebrows raised in surprise, but she quickly played it off. “Uh, yeah, sure.”

Nathan nodded, then sat on the bed next to her. Freya didn’t miss the way his hand brushed her thigh and hated that her skin tingled at the contact. She was sure he didn’t mean anything of it, and yet all Freya could think about was how they’d been that close less than 24 hours prior during their run-in when she was sneaking through the courtyard and for some odd reason, was happening again.

“I wanted to apologize,” he started. “I knew asking Jasper to step forward would catch Emetterio’s attention and would likely result in him choosing Jasper as your opponent since I told him to take that step. I wanted to see what you could do against someone larger than you, but also against someone I trusted not to kill you. You were never supposed to get seriously hurt and Jasper knew that, but you wouldn’t yield and he couldn’t just hand you the match in the position he got you in. But you had him, Freya. If you hadn’t gotten distracted, that match would’ve been yours. Easily. Regardless, though, I shouldn’t have intervened and I’m sorry.”

Freya blinked in response, taking a moment to process what Nathan said, then found herself fiddling with the bedsheet between the fingers of her right hand as she avoided eye contact.

“Freya, please say something.”

“I’m trying to figure out what to say,” she admitted, then took a breath before looking at him again. There was nothing but genuineness in his golden brown eyes. “I appreciate the apology. It’s nice to not be seen as weak for a change or assumed that I need to be protected, that seems to be a recurring theme in my life. And I guess it’s also nice to know you’re not necessarily out to kill me. Yet, at least.”

“No, I’m not,” Nathan chuckled, then shook his head. “And I don’t think you need to be protected. Again, I just wanted to see what you could do. Jasper didn’t go easy on you. You’re a force to be reckoned with.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“It is one. Honestly, though, I’m surprised you trust me enough when I say all that too. I’m not lying, nor do I want you to think I am. I just can’t blame you if you did.”

Freya smiled slightly, understanding the feeling he was expressing.

“I don’t have a valid reason not to trust you, Nathan. Especially after last night when you could’ve gotten me in trouble, but didn’t, then still let me go see Xaden. I think you at least deserve the benefit of the doubt. And I’m trying to get better at not thinking everyone is against me just because of my family’s past. Maybe that’s naive of me, but it’s exhausting to constantly feel on edge about other people.”

He nodded again and continued looking at Freya with interest.

“You are fascinating, Freya,” Nathan whispered, as though he didn’t mean to say it out loud, but didn’t stop himself from doing so either.

The way he looked at her like she was the only person in the world made Freya feel some type of way. But, she tried not to dwell on the feeling.

“What do you mean by that?” She asked, lowering her voice as well. “I can’t be that interesting. We just met, you don’t know anything about me.”

“I know enough, but I would like to know more.”

“Again with you being cryptic. What do you know? No, wait, scratch that. I already know I won’t get a straight answer. But, to be honest, I’d like to know more about you too. I just don’t think now is the right time.”

“Maybe not,” Nathan agreed. “We’ve gotta get that wrist of yours mended.”

“That’d be nice,” Freya responded but didn’t didn’t look away from him. She still had a burning question she needed to see if she could get an answer to. “Nathan, can I ask you something?”

“Sure, go for it.”

“The scribe you were talking to when you came in here, was she Nova’s sister?”

Nathan blinked, surprised by Freya’s question and for the first time since he got there, he looked away from her. Something about that made Freya feel wrong, which she tried to ignore.

“Yeah, Gemma is Nova’s sister,” Nathan replied, still looking down at the ground.

“And I take it that the two of you know each other well,” Freya continued without thinking, then stopped when a dreaded feeling washed over her. There was a tinge of bitterness to Freya’s tone that even came as a surprise to her. She refused to believe that she was feeling jealous. She had no reason to be, Nathan was her wingleader. Freya had no plan to own up to the feeling of jealousy either. However, when Nathan looked at her again Freya immediately glanced away as a blush burned her cheeks, nothing was helping her case to debunk that theory.

“We do,” Nathan told her, smirking, but that went unseen by Freya.

“That’s nice.”

There was nothing more Freya wanted at that moment than for Nathan to not call her out or for the topic to be changed and luckily Nathan seemed to pick up on that.

“Can I ask you a question, Freya?”

Slowly, Freya faced him again. She studied his expression, unsure if he was going to call her out for being jealous or not, but still nodded. “Of course.”

“Why is no one here with you?” He asked. “I, uh, I almost didn't come by because I thought your friends would be here and wouldn’t want me talking to you.”

“Xaden and Garrick don’t get to decide who I talk to. I want you here. They’d have to learn to deal with that if they were still here.”

“I understand, again, I just didn’t think you’d be alone which is why I waited to come by,” Nathan explained. “I didn’t want to cause more of a scene than I already have with your friends. Figured I’d give them a chance to cool down too. Unless they’re nearby and you think I should leave.”

“That’s considerate of you, but no, they’re not here anymore,” Freya replied then shifted, wincing at the pain that shot from her wrist again. “Urvi kicked them out within 20 minutes of being here.”

“And I’d do it again,” Urvi spoke up as she approached the bed holding a small glass vial of amber liquid, something Freya assumed Urvi was going to force her to drink so the pain would subside. “Those two kept getting in my way and would not shut their mouths. This one can stay though, Freya. He seems nice.”

Freya smiled, still facing Urvi, then glanced at Nathan.

“He is nice,” she stated and felt a flutter in her stomach when she saw Nathan smile too. Then, Freya looked at Urvi again. “What’s the vial for?”

“It’s to help with the pain.”

“Urvi, I don’t need it right now,”

“It’s not an option, dear,” a new voice spoke up and Freya looked behind Urvi to see an older woman, also clearly a healer, approached. Nolon followed closely behind, Freya recognized him as one of the higher-ups she saw during Conscription Day. “You need to drink it.”

“This is Winifred and Nolon,” Urvi explained as she handed Freya the vial. “They’re going to mend your wrist now. Wingleader, could you help me close this curtain around the bed so we have some privacy?”

“Of course,” Nathan responded, then got up off the bed and helped Urvi tug the curtain that surrounded Freya’s bed closed.

“Nathan?” Nolon asked when he entered through the curtains a moment later. “What are you doing here?”

“Oh, uh, Freya is part of my wing. I figured I should check in on her.”

That’s it? Freya couldn’t help but feel a little hurt at his response. She was under the impression he cared enough to check in on her, not that it was an obligation.

“There were other members of the fourth wing in here today, I don’t recall you coming to check in on them,” Urvi stated bluntly. Freya knew she’d have to thank her for that one day.

“Right, uh,” Nathan stammered, then tried to avoid eye contact with everyone in their confined space. “So Freya’s wrist.”

Freya had to bite her tongue to keep herself from laughing at how he tried so desperately to change the subject. However, she was still kind of hurt by him treating his visit like a chore. She didn’t ask him to be there, he just showed up. Was it too naive of her to think his intentions might’ve been different?

“Yes, it’s definitely broken,” Winifred announced as she gently placed her hand on Freya’s arm so she could inspect it better. “Can we just get your full name, Freya? We need it for the records. And please drink the leigheas serum.”

“Ok, I will,” Freya replied as she watched Urvi reach over to twist off the top of the vial for her since she couldn’t use her left hand to do it herself. “Thank you for mending me. My name is Freya Tarlor.”

“Tarlor?” Nolon asked, making Freya pause as she went to drink the serum. “I heard that name yesterday and I couldn’t help but wonder, do you have any relation to Caden Tarlor?”

“Yes, he’s my older brother. Well, was.”

“Oh, my,” Winifred gasped, then looked at Freya sympathetically. “Caden was one of the greatest menders I’ve ever seen. A mender signet is already so extremely rare and to think Navarre lost two of the strongest ones in history because of the same battle.”

Freya knew she was referring to Brennan Sorrengail as the other mender. He was seen as a hero to almost everyone whereas Caden was a traitor.

“You knew my brother?”

“We knew him very well, he helped out a lot in here during his years at the college,” Nolon stated. “He saved a lot of lives during his time here and went on to continue doing the same. Your brother was a great loss to this kingdom. And I’m sorry for your loss, Freya.”

“Thank you,” Freya replied and nodded. It was odd for her to hear someone who wasn’t on the rebellion side speak so highly of her brother, but she wasn’t surprised that he left such a good lasting impression. Caden was the best person she knew.

“Right, now let’s get that wrist of yours fixed up.”

Freya looked down at the vial she was still holding as everyone else seemed to circle her bed, preparing for what Nolon had to do to mend her wrist, then downed the serum. She grimaced at how bitter it tasted but didn’t complain as she handed the empty vial to Urvi. She was about to lay back down, but then her gaze fell on Nathan again as he stood out of the way of the other three.

“Would you like me to leave?” He asked and Freya knew he didn’t mean it in the sense that he didn’t want to be there. Nathan would only leave if she wanted him to.

Freya shook her head no.

“Please stay,” she whispered and that was all the convincing he needed.

Nathan was at her bedside again a moment later, helping her lay back down, but making sure to stay out of Nolon and Winifred’s way. Freya let her eyes flutter shut and hummed pleasantly as she felt the serum get to work as it spread through her body. Gradually, the pain coming from her wrist started to dull.

“This is going to hurt,” Nolon warned, making Freya open her eyes again. “And will continue to ache for a few weeks.”

“Thass ok,” Freya slurred then groaned, while Nathan chuckled. “Gods, pleasejustmendme.”

“Of course, Freya.”

“You’re going to want to bite down on this,” Urvi said while holding a strap of leather near Freya’s mouth.

Freya complied and bit down on the leather. Nervousness took over as she mentally prepared herself for the inevitable pain she was about to endure to heal her wrist, but before she could get too in her head about it, someone’s hand gently linked itself with her right hand and squeezed. The gesture caught Freya off guard, but when she glanced over and saw that it was Nathan, she relaxed.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he promised and Freya felt a flutter in her stomach again.

“Alright, are you ready?” Nolon asked. Freya took a deep breath, then nodded.

She watched as Nolon raised his hands above his head, the same way she had seen Caden do many times before. He began making a twisting motion and suddenly some of the most intense pain Freya had ever felt in her life came from her wrist, causing her to bite down hard on the leather as she screamed in agony. Tears filled her eyes as the screaming and pain continued, but it all came to an end when she passed out as a result of it.

~*~

Freya and Nathan remained silent as they walked back to the riders quadrant together. Once Nolon finished mending Freya’s wrist, it took her a little over an hour to wake back up. By the time she was discharged and allowed to return to her quadrant, it was already after curfew. However, she knew Nathan would make sure they didn’t get in trouble when all they were doing was walking back to the dorms.

“Thanks for staying,” Freya finally broke the silence as they finished climbing the last couple of stairs leading back to the riders quadrant. She felt anxious about starting the conversation and found herself fiddling with the loose strands of the sling her left arm was to reside in until her wrist didn’t cause her as much pain anymore. “I’m sure there are other things you’d rather be doing.”

“It’s no problem at all,” Nathan assured while they turned down the hallway that led back to the dorms.

Freya couldn’t tell if his walking her back to the barracks was to make sure she didn’t go sneaking off after curfew again or because he genuinely didn’t mind, but she didn’t feel like asking either. The two of them continued walking and weren’t far from the barracks when Nathan came to an abrupt stop and glanced behind them.

“What’s wrong?” Freya asked, concern lacing her voice as she looked back as well but only saw darkness. The air suddenly got drastically cooler, making Freya shiver like she had the night prior when Nathan stopped her before returning to the girl's barracks. “Nathan?”

“We’re being listened to,” he replied, keeping his eyes on a nearby pillar that they’d already walked past. “I know you’re there and that it’s after curfew. Show yourself.”

Freya watched him in shock as his expression remained cold and hard, keeping his eyes fixated on that one pillar. A few moments went by and no one stepped out from behind it.

“Nathan, I don’t think anyone is there, we-.”

“Now, Nova,” Nathan interrupted and Freya felt even more lost than before.

However, after a long pause, a female silhouette stepped out from behind the pillar and Freya knew it was her friend. Well, who she thought could eventually be a friend, but now she wasn’t so sure with their eavesdropping on her conversation with Nathan.

“You and your damn air-wielding,” Nova fumed as she approached them, stopping a few feet in front of them. A cool breeze soon flew by them, blowing Freya’s no longer braided hair around. “Is a pain in my ass.”

“What are you doing out after curfew?” Nathan asked her, a firmness to his tone as he spoke. “You could get in so much shit if you get caught.”

“We were supposed to meet up, remember?” Nova challenged while crossing her arms.

Nathan sighed as realization donned on his features.

“Fuck, that’s right. I’m sorry, Noves. I was in the healer quadrant.”

“With her, I know. Hey, Freya. How’s the wrist?”

“No longer broken,” Freya responded, then shook her head so she didn’t lose focus on the interaction that was playing out in front of her. “Wait a minute, air-wielding?”

“Yeah,” Nathan started, then took a breath. “It’s my signet. I can control the wind and air.”

That explained the sudden change in the air’s temperature and random breezes that happened whenever Nathan was around, Freya thought. But still, there was something else she didn’t understand and she was starting to feel overwhelmed as her mind began to race.

“H-how do the two of you know each other? How did you know what his signet was? Am I losing my mind?”

“No, you’re not,” Nova explained softly, then looked at Nathan.

“Can one of you please tell me what the fuck is going on then?” Freya pleaded.

“You wanna tell her, or me?” Nova asked Nathan. Freya immediately moved her gaze back to the wingleader and waited for his response.

“Nova is my younger sister,” Nathan revealed.

Freya’s mouth fell open in shock. “Sister!?”

“It’s true, he’s my brother,” Nova reiterated.

“Oh, gods. Wait, so the scribe you were talking to-.”

“Is also our sister,” Nathan finished for her. “There’s three of us. I’m the oldest, Gemma is the middle and Nova is the youngest.”

“You saw Gem?” Nova gasped. “When? What did she say?”

“Not now, Nova,” Nathan hissed at his sister but kept his eyes on Freya. She’d fallen silent and he didn’t miss the hurt that showed on her features as she processed what she’d been told. He wasn’t sure what compelled him but instinctively, Nathan reached toward her, feeling an intense want to comfort her like he had in the healer quadrant earlier. “Freya-.”

She immediately stepped away from him.

“Please, don’t touch me,” Freya whispered then glanced between the other two, the hurt becoming more prominent in her eyes with each passing second. Freya looked like she wanted to say more, but instead turned away from them so she could start walking down the hall again. “I’m going to bed.”

“Freya, we can talk about this,” Nathan tried to reason, reaching toward her again but stopping himself to comply with her wishes.

“Neither of us wanted to upset you,” Nova spoke up and Freya stopped.

“The most annoying part is that I’m more frustrated with myself than I am with either of you,” Freya explained as she turned to face them again, the defences she let down since crossing the parapet were back up and stronger than ever. “I was honest with both of you. I spoke about my past and my family because… because I felt I could trust the two of you, but neither of you could do the same to me. You’re siblings and deliberately didn’t tell me. Gods, I’m so stupid. This is my own fault. Why did either of you bother making an effort to befriend me, hm? Was it to get information because I’m a marked one? Or was it because, like everyone else in this fucking place, the two of you think a child of rebellion leaders can’t exist peacefully in your perfect little kingdom?”

Nova shook her head and stepped forward.

“It’s not like that, Freya! We’re not against you. I know it’s only been a day, but the moment you helped me on the parapet, I knew you were good. That you weren’t this evil being we’ve been warned about for the past three years because of what your parents did or that you should be avoided because of that relic on your arm. You’re not like most of the people in here. You genuinely care about others and give them the benefit of the doubt, that’s why I wanted to befriend you because this place is full of people who only care about themselves and their survival. What I’m gathering about you, though, is that you’re weary of trusting people and letting them in. You have every right to feel that way given how harsh and unfair this world has been to you. However, that’s one hell of a lonely life to live if it results in you clinging to the first excuse you’re given just so you can close yourself off from anyone who cares about you. And we do care about you, Freya. You’ve shown us enough already to know you’re worthy of that because of how selfless you are. Do you think I would’ve fought that girl in the barracks yesterday morning if I didn’t care that they were trying to kill you? Or Bennett would’ve reminded you of the dagger in your boot if they wanted those girls to be successful in their attack? I get that you have the people you already trust, but it is possible to build other relations during your time here. I thought we could potentially be very good friends, but you didn’t even give me a chance to explain the situation.”

Freya remained silent, blinking as she processed the tangent Nova just went on. There was no denying that Nova made valid points. Freya had always been hesitant to build new relationships with people, but something about Nova, Bennett and Nathan made her think she didn’t need to be. She hated the feeling of letting her guard down but with them, it came easily. And that was terrifying to her. Freya always thought being too trusting made her naive and that was a fair assumption to have, but it wasn’t fair to apply that to every new interaction she had with people. How would she know what a relationship could develop into if she didn’t give it the chance to be anything? Nova was right, it was a lonely life.

“You’re right,” Freya finally spoke again and shook her head. “I should’ve let you explain instead of just assuming the worst. We met a day ago, but here you are calling me out on my bullshit and helping save my life. Maybe this is naive of me to say, but I don’t think someone who doesn’t have my best interests in mind would do that.”

“Trusting people doesn’t make you naive, Freya,” Nova explained. “And having feelings you’re unsure of doesn’t make you weak.”

Damn, she hit the nail right on the head again. Freya took a deep breath and nodded.

“And what about you?” She asked, turning her attention back to Nathan. “I didn’t help you on the parapet, we’re not squad mates and our bunks aren’t next to each other. What does it matter to you if I closed you out? You could’ve just let me walk.”

Nathan looked at her, clearly debating his words before speaking again.

“You saved my little sister,” he responded. “You seem like you could be a good friend for her, I didn’t want that relationship severed.”

“Nathan, you’re an idiot,” Nova groaned, but Freya didn’t pay any attention to her comment. She was too taken aback by what Nathan said and couldn’t help but scoff.

“That’s it?” Freya started, then let out a sarcastic laugh when Nathan didn’t respond. “I really am just an obligation to you, aren’t I? How dare I think you were worried and even remotely cared about me. It was a waste of my time thinking anything between us wasn’t purely transactional. My mistake, wingleader.”

“Freya, it’s a lot more complicated than that,” Nathan stated.

“What is so complicated? Why are you so invested in me and not any other first year?”

“I don’t know.”

“Fuck, what do you know then?” Freya asked, her voice raising, but she stood so she could take a breath and calm down. She was immediately brought back to their conversation in the courtyard the night before and it made her head hurt. “No, I can’t do this right now. I need to go to bed. Nova, can we talk in the morning? I’d like to hear your side of everything.”

“Of course,” Nova said with a nod. “Would you like me to walk back with you?”

“No, I just need to be alone right now. It’s been a long day. Thank you, though. I’ll see you in the barracks if I’m still awake when you get back.”

Freya took another breath, then looked at Nathan again while he continued watching her with a hard, unreadable expression. It made her furious. Gone was the warm, sweet guy she spoke with then went on to hold her hand while her wrist was mended in the healer quadrant and back was the cold, harsh wingleader who made it impossible for anyone to know what he was thinking.

“Just leave me alone, Nathan,” Freya spoke again then abruptly turned her back to him and continued making her way to the barracks. This time, no one stopped her.

“Idiot,” Nova muttered again just before Freya rounded a corner and soon got out of their sight. Freya knew Nova was speaking to Nathan, so she decided not to show any indication that she’d heard the comment. She just wanted to sleep.

Soon, Freya entered the hallway that separated the boy's and girl’s barracks from each other. The hallway looked identical to the way it did the night before when she snuck back inside, but this time Freya knew Nathan wasn’t lurking in the shadows. However, when she heard a low whistle, she knew someone else was.

“I’m not in the mood for games, Xaden,” Freya stated, coming to a stop as she waited for her best friend to show himself.

“My apologies,” Xaden said before stepping out from the shadows just a couple of feet ahead. He was very aware that Freya wasn’t too happy with him after he indirectly caused her broken wrist and couldn’t blame her either. “I just wanted to check in on you, Fern. How’s the wrist?”

“Mended.”

“That’s good.”

Xaden reached up to scratch the back of his neck at the awkward silence that resumed between them. Freya just rolled her eyes.

“What’s the actual reason you’re out here?” She asked. “You know better than to test me when I’m already pissed off at you.”

“I know, I know,” Xaden started, holding his hands up in defence. “I did want to make sure you were ok, though.”

“What else?”

Xaden sighed.

“I saw the wingleader making his way toward the healer quadrant after Garrick and I got back. I was going to ask if he came to see you.”

“He did,” Freya admitted. “But it’s alright, I don’t think he’ll interfere with us anymore. I made it very clear I wanted to be left alone.”

“But Freya, that doesn’t mean he’ll listen,” Xaden explained. “We can’t let our guard down with him.”

“I won’t,” Freya replied and mentally cursed herself over the fact that she almost did let her guard down with Nathan in more ways than one. “Anyways, I’m going to go to bed. I’m exhausted.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to talk? Something seems to be bothering you, Fern.”

“I’m sure. We can talk tomorrow.”

“Ok,” Xaden nodded, then stepped forward. He looked her over, then reached up to delicately tuck her hair behind her ear again, making Freya relax. Something about Xaden and that specific gesture brought her so much comfort. It also made her heart beat for what felt like a thousand beats a minute. “Goodnight, beautiful.”

Freya’s heart swelled at his words, but she was quick to shake her head free of any thoughts she may form because of it. She also tried to ignore the nagging thought she had echoing in her brain that Nathan happened to be the centre of.

Freya was extra cautious as she descended into the valley below the citadel. After her run-in with Nathan, she continuously checked her surroundings and remained hiding in the shadows, not risking being seen by anyone else.

Nathan could’ve gone and told the other wingleaders or those above them that he caught not only two first years but two marked ones out after curfew, he had every right to not cover for her. Nathan didn’t owe Freya anything, let alone did he need to be breaking the rules himself by not reporting such a thing. There was a good chance his letting Freya continue going where she was headed was a decoy and that she and Xaden could be ambushed by their superiors, but Freya didn’t think that’s what was bound to happen.

Why did Nathan help her the way he did? What did he mean when he said there was something about her? And why did she feel like she could trust him? Those were just some of the questions that plagued Freya’s mind as she started walking through the valley, not having any idea where Xaden might be. But still, she shook her head free of the thoughts and continued on her way.

There wasn’t much of a path that Freya could make out in the dim moonlight, but she could see where some of the tall grass had been parted, as though someone or something walked through it recently. Apart from that small separation in the grass, there was no indication that anyone else was nearby. For all Freya knew, she could be unknowingly following after a deadly creature, but she couldn’t turn back now.

The Iakobos River rushed nearby and Freya decided to walk closer to it as she continued navigating the grass, but not getting too close. The moon just wasn’t bright enough for her to safely be able to tell where the bank of the river started and Freya wasn’t going to take any chances in letting her official cause of death be drowning in a river while sneaking out after curfew.

She continued walking for a few more minutes, starting to wonder if she was even near wherever Xaden had gone off to, then she heard the same low whistle he used to get her attention in the barracks just barely over the sound of the rushing water and knew she was going the right way.

After rounding a slight bend, Freya saw a large boulder a few feet ahead amongst a row of ancient-looking oak trees and leaning against it was Xaden. All the tension and anxiety Freya was feeling leading up until then seemed to disappear as Xaden looked toward her and smiled once their gazes met. Freya returned the smile then picked up her pace and jogged over to him, trying to stay mindful of the branches and stones that littered the ground but were hidden by the grass.

“You made it,” Xaden greeted as he stood up straight and stepped toward her, still smiling as she approached. “I was starting to think something happened.”

“Sorry, I got sidetracked,” Freya explained, not sure if she should mention that she’d been caught by Nathan or not. “Um, you didn’t see anyone on your way out here, did you?”

“No, I didn’t. Did you?”

“No, I was just making sure.”

Freya fell silent, hating that she lied but figured there was no need to worry Xaden about something she already handled. However, instead of responding right away, Xaden studied her for a moment and then raised his eyebrow at her skeptically.

“You’re lying to me, Fern,” he stated without hesitation. “Who did you see?”

Freya internally cursed herself. Of course, Xaden could still read her like a book.

“Nathan, our wingleader,” she sighed in defeat. “He caught me while I was sneaking through the courtyard.”

“Our wingleader!? Are you serious?”

“Yes, Xaden. But he, he let me go. I don’t know why he did, but I don’t think he’s going to do anything.”

Xaden groaned in aggravation as he ran his hand over his face and then held his chin between his thumb and pointer finger. “For fuck’s sake, Freya. I knew you could be naive sometimes but I didn’t think you’d be this bad on the first night here with trusting a damn wingleader!”

Freya’s mouth fell open at his words. There was only one other time Xaden had ever spoken to her like that and Freya hated it. She was taken off guard and when that happened, she tended to act impulsively. Without saying another word, she turned her back to Xaden and started walking back the way she came from.

“Where are you going?” Xaden called after her and Freya could hear him following.

“Back to the dorms,” she replied simply. “This conversation is over if you’re going to speak to me the same way you did when our parents were captured once Aretia fell. I’m not the one to blame just because you feel inconvenienced by something, Xaden. I’m your friend, not your verbal punching bag.”

Freya didn’t look at Xaden as she spoke, but she only made it a few more steps before his hand gripped her arm and spun her back around to face him.

“Freya,” he started, then paused. There were a lot of emotions flashing through his eyes, but the most prominent one Freya saw was regret. “You’re right. I’m sorry, that was uncalled for.”

Freya took a deep breath.

“I’d say so.”

“Please don’t go, Fern. Again, I’m sorry. It just feels like everyone here is against us and it doesn’t make sense for a wingleader to just let you off with no repercussions. Not when they’re all so apprehensive of us because of these relics on our arms.”

“You think I don’t know that?” Freya asked. “We’re the outsiders, I’m aware. But you didn’t have that conversation with Nathan, I did. You know better than anyone I’m not going to trust just anyone here, let alone a wingleader. But he let me go, Xaden. He knew you were out here too and still let me go and didn’t follow. If we were going to be ambushed do you not think he would’ve done it by now? Why would he let us get this far?”

Xaden stayed silent for a moment, then nodded. “I guess you’re right.”

“Why did you want me to come out here, anyway?”

“I wanted to talk. I, I missed you, Freya.”

At that, Freya visibly relaxed again once again. She always wondered if Xaden knew how strong his hold on her was.

“Then let's talk,” she responded softly, letting Xaden lead them back toward the boulder.

The two of them remained silent as they continued past the boulder toward the row of oak trees. Only the rushing water, the chirping of crickets and cicadas and their footsteps, as they walked through the grass, could be heard. They passed two of the trees but stopped at the third as Xaden leaned against a lower branch and turned to face Freya again.

“How are you, Fern?” Xaden asked.

Freya snorted.

“Between getting caught by our wingleader and how this conversation started, I was a lot better 20 minutes ago.”

“You know that’s not what I meant. I haven’t seen you in three years. How are you doing? I know being here isn’t easy for you and you don’t have to pretend like it is. Not around me.”

At that, Freya dropped her gaze. She could feel the tears welling in her eyes as the reality of the situation she was in began setting in again. The last thing she wanted to do was cry, but at least with Xaden, she knew she could without judgment.

“Not great,” Freya admitted, her voice cracking as she involuntarily let out a sob. “Today really fucking sucked, actually.”

“Freya,” Xaden started, then stopped as he stepped toward her and brought her into his embrace. Freya wasted no time wrapping her arms around his middle as she leaned against his chest, letting herself dwell on being back in the safety she always felt around her oldest friend.

After a few moments, the tears stopped, but neither of them let go.

“I hate crying,” Freya eventually said aloud.

“I know you do,” Xaden chuckled, then shifted his arms as Freya moved away so that she’d only be at arm's distance. “Gods forbid Freya Tarlor show emotion.”

“Only select people get to see me be vulnerable. You’re one of them, Riorson.”

“I’m honoured.”

“Whatever,” Freya rolled her eyes and let out a small laugh. “Don’t feel so special, the same can be said about Garrick. Speaking of which, why isn’t he here too?”

“I told him I needed to talk to you,” Xaden replied with a shrug. “Just us. It’s been too long.”

Freya nodded in understanding. Although she, Xaden and Garrick had always been a trio, Garrick acknowledged that she and Xaden were inseparable their entire lives, up until they were forced to be apart. No one knew Xaden or Freya like they knew each other.

“It feels surreal being here,” Freya stated. “Not considering that we have to be here or that I have you and Garrick, either. Just everything. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it all. Remembering everything Caden told me about this place, but being here under completely different circumstances than I ever thought I would, it’s a lot. I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel.”

“I don’t think there’s a proper way to feel about all of this,” Xaden explained. “Whatever you’re feeling is valid. Yes, you may have ended up in the rider’s quadrant regardless if Caden was still here, but he’s not. He was taken from you. Hell, from me too. You know he was the older brother I never had. Everything changed the day Aretia fell and you don’t have to justify how you’re feeling because of it. None of us marked ones do. But I know being here is especially hard on you because of Caden and I want to help..”

“Having you here is more than I could ask for already,” she told him with a small smile. “I mean it.”

“I know, but I worry about you.”

“You don’t have to. I’m ok. Well, as ok as I can be.”

Xaden nodded, but Freya knew her words didn’t resonate anything in him. He’d always worry about her no matter what.

“The last three years of not knowing if you were ok have been hell, Freya,” he confessed. “It drove me nuts not being able to talk to you. To check in with you. I just had to keep myself convinced that I’d be seeing you again until it was finally time.”

“And now here we are,” Freya spoke softly. “You kept your promise to me after all. You knew we’d both make it through those years to be together again. You found me.”

“That I did,” Xaden said, then smiled. “I’m not sure what I would’ve done if I didn’t.”

“Good thing we don’t have to worry about that then. We’re going to get through these next three years here, Xaden. Together. Me, you and Garrick are going to make it to Threshing and hopefully each bond with a dragon. And when that happens, there’s nothing more anyone can do. It doesn’t matter if they all expect us to fail or be killed because of who our parents were. We don’t owe them anything. We just have to survive.”

“You’re right. And we will. The odds are going to be so stacked against us, but, there’s not a single part that thinks we can’t overcome any challenge we’re going to face. And speaking of a dragon, I could be very wrong but, I don’t think Caden’s dragon has a rider right now.”

“You don’t?” Freya asked.

Xaden shook his head.

“No,” he answered. “I overheard someone say only four of the dragons we saw earlier were bonded, but not the green one. It makes sense too. Caden was a powerful mender. The bond he had with his dragon was incredibly strong, which is what made him so powerful. Your father's dragon died within a day of the executions because of how strong their bond was, your mother’s dragon was its mate and died too. The death of two dragons was already so significant, that everyone wondered what would happen with Caden’s dragon too. If I’m not mistaken, that dragon has hardly been seen over the last three years.”

Freya’s eyes widened in surprise as she processed everything she just heard.

“H-how do you know that?” She stuttered as her voice cracked. “I know my parents' dragons were mates, but no one ever told me what happened to them after they died. I asked and was never given a straight answer. How did you find that out?”

“I-,” Xaden started, then trailed off as he looked to the ground. “I know some people who told me.”

“Who?”

“Freya-.”

“Who, Xaden?” Freya asked firmly.

Xaden took a breath, then sighed.

“I can’t tell you, Fern,” he whispered.

“What do you mean you can’t tell me?” Freya questioned, raising her voice at him. “We’re talking about my parents. You can’t just keep things about them from me because you feel like that!”

“It’s not that simple! Freya, you know it’s not. I would never keep something like this from you if I didn’t think it was safer that you didn’t know. At least not yet.”

“That’s not fair for you to decide!”

“I know it’s not,” Xaden stressed. “But I just can’t tell you. I will eventually, I promise. Just not yet.”

“I don’t how you’re expecting me to trust you when I know you’re keeping something from me, Xaden,” Freya stated while trying to ignore the tears that began welling in her eyes. “If you’re not going to tell me who, then tell me this. Did the person who told you about my parents’ dragons know where I was for the past three years and tell you that too?”

Xaden sighed again but nodded.

“Yes, they did.”

“And you didn’t even try to get in contact with me. You know, for someone who claims to care about me you’ve got a pretty shit way of showing it. The Xaden I know would’ve never done that to me, he actually cared and would’ve wanted to make sure I was ok. He also wouldn’t have kept something about my parents from me. I’m starting to think he died Calldyr with them too.”

“I didn’t have a choice,” he stated. “I was blackmailed with your safety. I can’t go into more detail than that, but if I tried to contact you, I was told you could be targeted because of it. I wasn’t taking that chance. I knew you were safe with your foster family as was and that they were good to you. That’s all I needed to know. I found out about what happened to your parents and Caden’s dragons maybe a month ago as I was getting ready to come here. The person that told me knew I’d be seeing you and I guess they decided we should know that.”

Freya just shook her head. “This is so unbelievably cryptic.”

“I know it is, but please, Fern. You have every right to not believe or trust me with anything regarding this, but I need you to know that I’ve always had your best interest at heart and continue to do so. Please trust me.”

Once Xaden concluded his spiel, he and Freya just stared at each other not saying a word. It killed him not knowing what she was thinking, but after a few moments, Freya spoke up again.

“I trust you. Don’t get this wrong though, Xaden. I’m pissed. This isn’t fair of you, but my gut is telling me I can still trust you. You’ve never given me a reason not to.”

“And I won’t,” Xaden promised, visibly relaxing as he spoke. “You’re one of the most important people in my life, Freya. I never want to hurt you in any way.”

Instead of responding, Freya just nodded, making a few strands of her hair fall in front of her face as she did. She internally cursed herself for not braiding it again, already feeling annoyed with its full length that reached the middle of her back. However, before she could tuck the strands behind her ear again, Xaden was reaching up and delicately doing it for her.

“Your hair’s longer than it was before. I like it.”

Freya’s heart fluttered at his comment, but she tried to play it off.

“That’s what happens when you let it grow out,” she teased. “I was told I should cut it short before I came in here, but I couldn’t. I don’t like it short.”

“I like it long,” Xaden explained. “But you’ve always been beautiful regardless of your hair length.”

Instead of moving his hand away after tucking the strands of hair away, Xaden kept it at the side of Freya’s face, almost cupping her jaw, but was seemingly waiting for her to tell him that was ok. The gesture made Freya’s stomach do a flip and she was immediately taken back to the last night she and Xaden were together before being displaced.

“Don’t do this, Xaden,” she whispered and closed her eyes.

“Is it so bad that I want to?” He asked, making Freya flutter her eyes back open and be met by an intense gaze. “I missed you, Freya.”

“I missed you too, but-.” Freya started but cut herself off. “We can’t.”

Xaden leaned in toward her and Freya’s mind screamed at her to step away. But she couldn’t. She craved what was about to happen.

“If you tell me to stop, I will. Just say the word.”

Gone was Freya’s logic as she glanced at Xaden’s mouth, then back to his eyes. She felt so captivated that even if she wanted to say anything, there was no way she could. Instead, she leaned in closer as well and Xaden didn’t miss the window of opportunity he got.

His lips met Freya’s with force. It felt like he’d been craving the same thing and the way his arms wrapped around Freya to bring her closer made her believe that he did too. Feeling sparks was an understatement. What Freya felt was a tidal wave of pent-up emotion and sexual tension between her and Xaden finally washed away. Leading up to the peak of the rebellion, the two of them began messing around in secret. No one knew but them. It was an unhealthy outlet they both used to cope with everything that was happening. They’d slept together during their last night before being relocated but never put a label on anything because it didn’t matter if they were apart. Freya spent the last three years thinking about it. So did Xaden.

His hold on her tightened and Freya didn’t wait long to slide her hands over his chest and up to his shoulders before wrapping her arms around the back of his neck. Xaden moaned slightly when Freya’s right hand cupped the back of his head and tugged at his hair. The noise made her feel feral. She opened her mouth wider to allow Xaden more access and he wasted no time deepening the kiss.

However, that tiny voice in the back of Freya’s mind returned and it was mad. Dread washed over her as she remembered how bad of an idea making out with her best friend was and she took a step back in an attempt to move away. However, Xaden stepped toward her at the same time and their chests met.

“Xaden,” Freya said when she finally broke the kiss and stepped away again. But, with that step, the back of her foot got caught on one of the large exposed roots of the tree they were near, making her lose her balance and fall backwards. “Shit!”

The two of them were still tangled in each other’s embrace, there was no time for Xaden to prevent himself from going down with her. However, he quickly brought Freya close again then leaned to the side, angling his shoulder so that he would make contact with the ground first instead of her. Once that happened, the two of them rolled slightly and ended up with Freya lying directly on top of Xaden with their arms still wrapped around each other.

Freya’s head was against Xaden’s chest, but she quickly lifted her head to look at him with a startled expression. Once they made eye contact again, they both started laughing.

“Not exactly how I pictured that playing out,” Xaden was the first to speak again.

“Me neither,” Freya agreed while shaking her head, still chuckling. She fell silent shortly after that and looked away.

Xaden smiled as he watched her, but it fell when he realized she was trying not to look at him. “What’s on your mind, Fern?”

Freya sighed.

“We can’t do that again, Xaden.”

“Why not?”

“Because you’re marrying someone else,” Freya told him. “I can’t do this with you if you’re never going to be mine.”

“Freya,” Xaden started but stopped when Freya rolled off of him. He propped himself on his arms and exhaled, hating the sudden lack of contact between them. However, there wasn’t much he could say, she was right after all.

“Her name is Cat, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, it is.”

“And when does the betrothal kick in?” Freya asked, even though she didn’t really want to know the answer.

“Her 20th birthday,” Xaden explained. “Next year.”

“Exactly.”

With that, Freya got up from the ground and started brushing the dirt and grass from her cloak. Xaden stood up too.

“Freya, the agreement for me and her to marry doesn’t change how I feel about you.”

“But it changes many things,” Freya expressed her concerns. “It doesn’t change how I feel about you either, but I can’t pursue something that I’ll never have. It hurts too much.”

“But-.”

“No buts. Please, Xaden, don’t make this harder than it already is. Your dad always said we were soulmates when we were younger and I never thought he was wrong. However, it wasn’t until we were older that I started to think he meant platonically. And that’s ok. You’re still my best friend, but just that.”

“How can you say that if the two of us were never given a proper chance to be together?” Xaden questioned.

“If that’s meant to happen then it will,” Freya said with a shrug. “But for now, you’re not mine. And, I think I just need some time to process that for the rest of the night. I’m going to head back to the dorms.”

“I’ll walk with you.”

“You can walk with me back to the steps, but then we have to take turns going back up to the citadel. I don’t want to risk getting caught again.”

At that, Xaden nodded, knowing he wouldn’t be able to sway her on the topic. He and Freya stayed silent as they walked past the boulder and along the river again. There was so much both of them wanted to say, but it just wasn’t the time. Neither of them spoke the entire way back to the staircase that led to the courtyard.

“You go first,” Xaden spoke up once they reached the bottom step. “I’ll wait a few minutes then go too. There’s a larger stone to the right of the entrance to the dorms, move it to the left side of the walkway so I know you made it back without issue, please. You’ll know what stone I mean when you see it.”

“Ok, I will,” Freya nodded, then put her hood up and glanced at the steps she had to climb. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

Freya took a step, but that was as far as she got before Xaden reached out to grab her hand so that she’d stop. She quickly looked back at him, wondering what he was doing, but all Xaden did was smile.

“Goodnight, Freya,” he said and squeezed her hand.

“Goodnight, Xaden,” she replied and squeezed his hand back before letting go and making her way up the steps.

When Freya reached the courtyard, she slipped into the shadows again as she continued toward the first year's living quarters. The courtyard was silent, but Freya was still hyperaware after her run-in with her wingleader earlier in the night and assumed he was still lurking nearby somewhere. Basgiath’s bells rang in the distance, indicating the beginning of a new hour and Freya exhaled.

“At least I haven’t been out a full hour,” she muttered to herself, remembering that she was still in her bed waiting for a sign from Xaden the last time she heard the bells toll.

She made it through the courtyard with ease, but Freya still sighed in relief when she saw the entrance to the dorms come into view. Once she reached the doorway, she looked at the ground to the right and spotted a perfectly round stone that was larger than the others it was amongst. Freya smiled as she bent down to grab the stone and move it to the left side of the walkway so Xaden would see, then quietly opened the door and went inside.

Once indoors, Freya looked both left and right to make sure she was still in the clear before heading left toward the women’s hall. She moved quietly but quickly as she made her way down the hall and sighed in relief when she saw the large door that would take her back to where the beds were.

However, while taking those last few steps toward the door, something shifted. The air suddenly got unnaturally cold as a breeze blew by, to the point that it made Freya shiver, even in her heavy cloak. She knew there was something odd happening, so she stopped and spun around. At first, she was met by the darkness of the hallway, but then her eyes focused on the figure of someone leaning against the wall, who was just barely visible in the moonlight that shone in from a nearby window. It was Nathan.

“Goodnight, Freya,” he said as he stepped back into the shadows, then he was gone. The temperature returned to normal and Freya was left speechless. However, she brushed it off and quickly made her way into the barracks so she could finally go to sleep.

~*~

Freya heard a shuffling noise from nearby but kept her eyes closed. She refused to believe it was time to wake up already, especially since she only got maybe four hours of sleep following her meeting with Xaden. It was just too soon.

The shuffling sounded again, but this time it seemed closer and that’s when Freya thought that maybe it was nearing time to way up. She blinked her eyes open, expecting to be met by sunlight pouring in from the windows, but it was still fairly dark out. The sun was just beginning to rise. Confused, Freya sat up and looked over at Nova’s bed to see her still asleep and was left feeling even more puzzled.

“Oh, good, you’re awake,” a female voice spoke up from behind Freya, making her jump. But before Freya could even look at the person, they quickly wrapped a rope around her neck and pulled it tightly, choking her.

Panic took over as she instinctively reached up to remove the rope from her neck, but it was no use. The female cadet only pulled tighter, making it impossible for Freya to breathe.

“That relic on your arm makes you a liability to the quadrant. I’m just doing what someone else would’ve inevitably done.”

Freya desperately tried to inhale, but just couldn’t. Her fighting against the rope only made it worse and it wasn’t long before her vision started getting blurry. The cadet yanked again, which resulted in Freya being pulled from her bed and landing on the ground with a thump, the rope not loosening even slightly. However, the thump Freya made when she hit the ground was enough to stir some others awake.

“What’s going on?” Nova asked as she tiredly blinked her eyes open, then gasped when she saw the scene unfolding in front of her. “Freya!”

“Don’t interfere,” another female cadet with blonde hair spoke up from behind where Freya was struggling on the ground, then stepped forward and pointed a dagger at Nova threateningly.

Nova looked at the girl questioningly as she stood up, then wasted no grabbing the girl's wrist and knocking the dagger out of her hand. The two of them engaged in one-on-one combat, but it was obvious Nova had the upper hand. Freya made a mental note to tell Nova how badass she was, well, if Freya survived she would.

On top of her increasingly blurring vision, Freya started feeling lightheaded at the lack of oxygen she was getting, but she still tried her best to get free. Then, she heard a familiar voice call out to her.

“Freya, your boot!”

It was the same words Nova said to her before she went onto the parapet, but it didn’t sound like Nova, it sounded like Bennett. Regardless, Freya did glance at her boots which were neatly tucked under her bed just an arm's length away, and then it clicked. She had a dagger in one of those boots.

Acting fast, Freya reached for her left boot, and sure enough, the dagger that once belonged to Caden was right where she left it. Without a second thought, she switched the blade open and jammed it back into the cadet’s shoulder as hard as she could.

The girl cried out in pain and let go of the rope as she reached up toward her injury. Freya kept her grip on the dagger and yanked it out of the girl’s shoulder as she rolled away, pausing only to take a deep breath so she could fill her lungs with the air they required. Unsurprisingly, she coughed as she was finally able to breathe. Freya tried to ignore the fact that this was the second time in one night she was left breathless, but not in a good way.

However, Freya was still in defence mode and quickly stood up while still trying to catch her breath. The other cadet didn’t stand though and that’s when Freya noticed how much blood she was losing from the stab wound.

“Someone help me get her to the healer’s quadrant, now!” The blonde cadet yelled as she rushed past Freya and helped her attacker stand up. More girls surrounded the scene and looked at each other unsurely. Then one other cadet stepped forward to help them. Of course, it was Amber Mavis.

Freya watched, still taking deep breaths but she was at a standstill. The cadet that attacked her was fighting to keep her eyes open as she was carried away by the other two.

“Freya,” a voice spoke up softly from behind her. She was met by Nova and Bennett when she turned around to face them.

“I didn’t mean to cause that much damage,” Freya stated and took a shaky breath, the first one that was unrelated to her trying to breathe again but was rather a result of the emotions washing over her. “Oh, Gods, what if she dies because of me? On the second day?”

“Freya, she showed no remorse in attempting to murder you,” Nova told her firmly.

“You acted in self-defence,” Bennett chimed in. “You would be dead on the ground right now if you didn’t fight back.”

“I know, but still,” Freya stressed. “It’s kill or be killed in this place, but fuck, I didn’t think I’d crack already.”

“It’s going to be alright,” Nova assured, then pulled her in for a hug. Freya immediately returned the gesture. “Come on, let’s go get you cleaned up.”

By the time Freya, Nova and Bennett returned to the barracks, most of the room was cleared out. It was time for breakfast so they were able to change into their uniforms in peace. Once changed, neither of them spoke a word as they all glanced at the now spotless floor, clean of the blood pool that was there about thirty minutes prior. A feeling of dread overcame Freya as she took a deep breath, then followed the other two out of the dorms and toward the gathering hall.

Freya didn’t have much of an appetite, but still took a plate of breakfast. She knew that she needed to force herself to eat something if she wanted to stand a chance on the sparring mat later that day. When she turned around, it didn’t take long for her to spot Xaden and Garrick where they sat at the end of a table, separated from the other first years that sat nearby.

“You go talk to your guys,” Bennett spoke up from where they stood next to Freya. “We’ll catch up with you later.”

“Yeah,” Nova said. “They’re going to want to know what happened.”

“Ok,” Freya replied. “Thank you, both of you. I’ll see you two at formation.”

Nova and Bennett smiled, then went on their way. Freya watched them go, then let her gaze fall back on her boys. She took a deep breath and headed towards them.

The tight-fitted tunic Freya wore as part of her uniform didn’t cover enough of her neck to hide the very noticeable bruise the rope left. It looked like a choker in a way minus the redness and swelling. She felt numerous pairs of eyes watching her as she walked down one of the aisles between tables and knew exactly what they were looking at. Freya hated the attention she was getting but tried to not let it get to her as she let her eyes scan the tables of people once again before they fell on someone, in particular, sitting at a table toward the back of the room with all the other wingleaders and section leaders.

Nathan watched her like a hawk and Freya could feel herself stiffening under his gaze. He was studying her and Freya hated it. She still didn’t understand what his deal was. However, the two of them held eye contact until a voice stole Freya’s attention away.

“What the hell happened?” Garrick asked, and Freya quickly glanced toward him and Xaden, who both stood up as she approached.

“Hey,” she greeted them sheepishly. “And nothing to worry about. Just an incident in the barracks this morning.”

“Just an incident, my ass,” Xaden said, then walked right up to her. He didn’t care who saw as he gently touched the side of her and ran his thumb over the bruise. Freya flinched as he touched the sensitive area, making his heart sink. “Who did this to you?”

“A female cadet,” she whispered in response. “Just as I was waking up. Can we sit down, please? People are staring.”

Xaden nodded, then led her back to the table so she could join him in sitting across from Garrick. Once they were seated, Freya filled them in on everything that happened.

“So, you don’t know if she’s dead or not?” Garrick asked, to which Freya just shook her head. “Gods. Whether she is or not, that could’ve been you, Fray.”

“I know, but it’s not,” Freya murmured, then poked at her breakfast with her fork. “She could be dead for all I know and I’m the one that caused it.”

“After she tried to brutally murder you,” Xaden reminded. He was dead silent while Freya told him and Garrick what happened, it was obvious he was fuming. “If anything, she had it coming. You didn’t have another option, Freya. It was that, or you died.”

“I know but, would it have happened if it wasn’t for this damn relic on my arm?” She snapped, making the other two fall silent. Freya took a breath to calm herself. “Listen, I know you’re both trying to help and I appreciate it, but I’m allowed to not feel relieved that I may have killed someone for the first time even if it meant saving my own life.”

The boys nodded.

“You’re right,” Garrick agreed. “Sorry, Freya. We didn’t mean to overstep.”

“It’s alright. Again, I know the two of you are just looking out for me. But, I need to process everything that happened to me this morning on my terms.”

“We understand,” Xaden stated, then glanced down at Freya’s almost full plate and decided to use that as a way to change the topic. “You should eat more of your breakfast, Fern.”

“I’m trying,” Freya muttered. “Not overly hungry.”

“I know, but it’s almost time for formation. Please, eat some more. For me?”

Freya glanced toward Xaden and smiled, silently agreeing to eat more before they had to go.

“For me?” Garrick repeated in a high-pitched voice, mimicking what Xaden had just said. “The two of you are so obvious with the blatant flirting sometimes.”

“Shush,” Freya chuckled in response, a blush burning at her cheeks. However, she didn’t play into his teasing. Instead, she placed a small bit of egg on her fork and then flung it toward her friend’s head. Unsurprisingly though, Garrick caught the egg in his mouth with ease then looked at her with a pointed gaze.

“Nice try, Tarlor. Now eat the rest of your damn food.”

Once breakfast was over, Freya, Xaden and Garrick all made their way to the courtyard for formation. When they arrived, Freya joined her squad, standing next to Nova in the back right corner of their area while Xaden took the spot of his squad’s area that would have him closest to Freya again. Garrick stood on his opposite side.

Freya zoned out when a scribe began naming off those on the death roll. Since the names on the death roll included those who died crossing the parapet and everything after, the list was rather long. Freya tried listening but struggled to focus. Among the names that were said, Freya knew one was the girl that fell off the parapet right away and another was the boy who fell off the parapet right in front of her. It was crazy to her that she didn’t even know their names.

“Cecily Walters,” the scribe listed off the last name on the list. “May we commend their souls to Malek.”

“Oh, Gods,” Nova whispered, then looked over at Freya sympathetically. “Cecily was the girl that attacked you.”

Freya could feel the colour draining from her face as she processed Nova’s words, but remained silent. She disassociated soon after and didn’t listen to anything more that was said during announcements.

Most of the day following formation went by in a blur. Freya’s head noticeably wasn’t where it needed to be during classes and she increasingly became more annoyed with herself because of it. She hardly paid attention during History and Battle Brief and somehow made it through both without getting called on to answer a question. Then, before she knew it, it was time for Gym.

Once changed into her fighting leathers and with her hair pulled back in a tight crown braid, Freya walked through the large gym that took up the majority of the first floor of the academic wing with Bennett. Most of the first years stood on one side while the second and third years stood on the other. Between them, amongst 20 or so mats, people were sparring with one another.

Freya joined the first years standing on the sidelines watching and letting her eyes scan over the various mats. Most opponents seemed evenly matched with one another from what she could see. On a mat a few feet over to her left, Nova circled another first year. Her opponent, a male cadet was noticeably larger than Nova, but it was obvious he didn’t anticipate how quick she could be. The boy took one swing at her, which Nova dodged easily, before swiftly ducking under his arm and grabbing ahold of it. She then twisted the cadet's arm behind his and pulled. He yielded soon after that.

Despite only knowing Nova for just barely 24 hours, Freya expected such an outcome. She knew Nova was a force to be reckoned with.

“You and you next,” Professor Emetterio said while pointing at two more first-years to be on the mat next. “Remember, we’re just assessing today. No need for any casualties or severe injuries, but also show off what you can do.”

Freya continued scanning the mats and it was then that she spotted Nathan sparring in one of the back corners. He was smiling while talking to his opponent with dark skin and black hair as they circled one another. As Freya observed, she got the impression that the two knew each other well. Then she realized Nathan’s opponent was her section leader, a man named Finn.

The two circled a few more times and that’s when Freya found herself letting her gaze trail down Nathan’s body, respectfully. He was shirtless, showing off just how fit he was and Freya could not look away from his chest and abs. He was stunning, to say the least, and for some reason, Freya found herself blushing just watching him.

“If you’re done gawking at our wingleader, you might want to check out this match over here,” Bennett suggested, making Freya jump. They laughed at her, then nodded toward a mat opposite Nathan’s where Xaden and Garrick were facing off. Shirtless, of course. “Not sure how you’re ‘just friends’ with those two men right there.”

Freya knew what they were referring to and she couldn’t argue it. Xaden and Garrick were both attractive men. She didn’t miss the way they smiled while taunting each other on the mat, either, but tried to ignore the sweat glistening on both of their upper bodies thanks to how hot it was in the gym. Then, Freya’s gaze fell onto just Xaden and she saw the playful glint in his eyes before he finally took a swing at Garrick. The two of them got a few good hits on one another, Freya didn’t know which one would yield first. Then, Xaden ducked an incoming right hook from Garrick and swiftly kicked Garrick’s legs out from underneath him, making him fall backwards onto the mat. Once on the ground, Xaden quickly pulled Garrick into a headlock, forcing him to yield. A victorious smile stretched across Xaden’s mouth, then he looked up and somehow met Freya’s gaze through the crowd. When their eyes locked, that smile grew as he winked at her.

Freya rolled her eyes and shook her head, making sure Xaden would see before she looked away, hoping her cheeks weren’t as noticeably red from the blush she felt continuing to burn them. Then, she let her gaze drift back to Nathan’s mat just as Finn yielded in response to the way Nathan had him pinned on the ground with his arm twisted behind his back. Nathan smiled at his victory but was quick to help his friend stand back up. Once they started moving away from their mat, Nathan looked toward Freya.

Her immediate instinct was to look away, but she didn’t and neither did he. They held each other’s gaze for a moment before Nathan smirked, and then nodded in her direction.

“You and,” Professor Emetterio’s voice snapped Freya out of the little trance she’d fallen into as he chose two new opponents to face off. “You.”

He’d just selected two more first years to spar, both female and as they stepped onto the mat in front of her, Freya noticed that one of them had a relic mark just like hers.

The girl was shorter than Freya and not very muscularly built with long brown hair and tanned skin. She looked terrified of being on that mat against someone much larger than her.

“Use speed to your advantage,” Freya said under her breath as the two girls circled each other and the girl with the relic ended up standing nearby. The way she quickly glanced over her shoulder in Freya’s direction was enough proof that she’d heard her. “Don’t let the size difference scare you.”

The girl nodded and Freya watched as she dodged punches and kicks with ease. After a few more hit attempts, her opponent seemed to get a bit winded and that’s when the girl with the relic struck. She swung her right fist into the other cadet’s stomach with enough force, that they hunched over in pain. Then, the cadet with the relic pulled the other girl down to the ground in a headlock of sorts and tightened her arms. The other girl yielded soon after.

Both girls got up after the mat, then joined the first years once again. However, the girl with the relic stopped before she could pass Freya.

“Thank you,” she said with a nod. “I needed the reinforcement. I’m Amira.”

“Freya.”

“I know,” Amira replied with a smile. “Thanks again.”

Freya blinked as she watched Amira go. She could’ve sworn she’d never seen the girl before, but somehow Amira knew who she was. It was an odd feeling to have, however, Freya’s thoughts were sidetracked when Xaden and Garrick joined the first year’s side while Nathan stood amongst the second and third years just a few steps behind.

She found herself glancing between Xaden and Nathan again and felt silly with how obvious she was probably being, but at least neither of them was looking at her. Well, until Professor Emetterio pointed at her and spoke up again.

“Alright, you and,” he trailed off looking around for someone to pair her up with. A wave of anxiety washed over Freya as she stepped forward, but she didn’t let herself get too in her thoughts as she stepped onto the mat, seemingly at the centre of attention all of a sudden. Emetterio took his time choosing Freya’s opponent and it began to stress her out. Then she noticed Nathan watching her as leaned toward a male second-year, who nodded at whatever Nathan said and then stepped forward to the front of the group. “Ah, yes, you.”

As if on cue, Emetterio chose the very tall, very muscular man who just stepped forward as her match, making Freya’s heart fall into the pit of her stomach. She immediately looked at Nathan again, knowing that this had been his plan, but he just looked back at her with an unreasonable expression that infuriated her. However, she wasn’t the only one who noticed Nathan’s plotting against her.

“Our wingleader is setting her up,” Xaden spoke to assumedly Garrick, Freya couldn’t look over her shoulder to confirm as she and the second year began circling one another, but she knew it was Xaden’s voice. “What is his problem?”

It was hard for Freya to focus on her opponent while hearing the chatter around her. It wasn’t just Xaden talking, others were speaking about her in general and it was distracting. Then, she found herself thinking about the advice Caden used to give her about blocking the outside noise. Their words could only get to her if she let them.

Pausing briefly, Freya took a deep breath to help centre herself. Unfortunately, that was enough of her letting her guard down. She was soon met with a harsh right hook as her opponent's fist came in contact with her jaw.

Freya gasped, and so did others around her following the hit. She looked back at the boy with wide eyes as the unpleasant metallic taste of blood filled her mouth, then spit some out.

“Relax,” Emetterio warned. “We’re just assessing today. There’s no need to injure another, Jasper.”

“I won’t go too hard on her,” the boy, Jasper, replied with a smirk. “Looks like someone tried to take her out already based on that bruise around her neck.”

That was enough to set Freya off. She didn’t respond, just started attacking. Her kicks and punches were strong and fast. They were enough to take a toll on Jasper. She needed to beat him down a bit and after one particularly hard knee to the stomach that left him hunched over in pain, Freya thought she finally had him. And she did until she noticed Xaden walking around the mat with a look of pure anger on his face. His eyes were set on Nathan, and that made Freya go still as she watched the scene unfold.

“Xaden, don’t,” were the only words Freya could get out before she was met with a fierce blow to the stomach. This time it was she who hunched over in pain and Jasper capsized the opportunity. He grabbed Freya’s left arm, the one she was using to hold her stomach, then flipped her over his back. A groan left Freya’s mouth as she came in contact with the hard surface face first, and soon Jasper began twisting her arm at an ungodly angle as he placed his knee against her back to hold her down.

“Yield,” he yelled while twisting her forearm tighter.

“No!” She yelled back and tried to get out of his hold, but it was no use. Jasper had her pinned. Then, she glanced up to see Xaden and Nathan talking.

“Yield!”

Except they weren’t just talking, instead they were getting into each other’s faces to the point that Xaden even shoved Nathan. Freya wanted to yell at them, but she couldn’t. All she could muster was another distressed yell.

“Yield, Freya!” Garrick called to her, but she still didn’t listen.