bibliothecate

Anne of Green Gables (via prettybooks)

“I’ve been waiting for you to come around my whole life, Lee. But a man can’t wait forever and stay a man.”

There’s no mention of the unemployed man, the family, the senior citizen or the kids “not getting into trouble” by being at the library- they’re all doing obviously positive and productive things, and only teens can (and definitely do) get into this unnamed and threatening “trouble.” Furthermore, it’s also implied that all this particular library has to offer teens is some generic “after-school program” that keeps them off the streets. No mention of what positive or productive thing the teens are doing in this program, no mention of how it’s bettering their lives, just a focus on how this library is keeping teens out of trouble and therefore keeping the teens from annoying/frightening everyone else in the community.

It is not a stupid question. Even if it is a stupid question, we have been thoroughly trained to answer your question without judgement or second-guessing. Besides, we’re mostly just glad you’re not asking us about the noise the printer is making again.

There are probably (at least) two desks in the library. One is where you check out books and is mostly staffed by people wearing nametags that say “Circulation Clerk.” These people can answer your questions about damaged or missing books, fines, and how many forms of identification we’ll need if you want to get a library card but your mailing address is in Taiwan. The other one is closer to the books and computers and is mostly staffed by people wearing nametags that say “Librarian.” These people can answer your questions about spider extermination, how to rent property to the United States Postal Service, and the number of tropical island nations in which you could theoretically establish the first United States Embassy. We would love to answer these questions for you. It would be a nice change from the printer.

We probably own a 3D printer by now. 3D printers, are cool, right? Please, please come use our 3D printer, it’s so lonely.

We spent a lot of money to hire this woodworker to come and teach a class at the library which you can attend for free. You will probably be the only person between the ages of ten and fifty in attendance, but your presence will fill the librarian with an unnameable joy. They will float back to their manager in a daze. “A young person came to my program,” they will say. You will have made their entire job worthwhile.

Every time you ask us for a book, movie, or music recommendation, a baby librarian gets their first cardigan.

Somewhere in the library, there is a form. If you fill out this form with your name and library card number and the details of the thing you are looking for, we will find you the thing. Sometimes the answer is “the thing is in Great Britain and they will not send it to us,” but more often the thing will just appear on hold for you, and one day you will pick up a copy of that out-of-print book you never thought you would read and maybe you will say, “Wow, the library is amazing,” and the librarian’s heart will glow. 

Please bring back book #2. The rest of its series misses it very much.

Five dollars is not a large library fine. Believe me, before I started working in libraries, I too wondered how someone could sleep at night, knowing they owed money to the library. When we laugh as you sheepishly apologize for your $2.50 in overdue fees, we are not mocking you, we are thinking of the ten people we sent to debt collection already today.

We really don’t care why you’re checking out Fifty Shades of Grey. Maybe you have a specifically-themed ironic bachelorette party to plan. Maybe you’re working on a thesis paper about mainstream media’s depiction of female sexuality. Maybe you just got curious. We will give you the benefit of the doubt. 

Whatever you’re smoking in the family restroom, please stop.

Somewhere on the library’s website, buried under “Links” or “Research” or “On-line Resources,” is a page that a librarian spent a month’s worth of work on. It contains many links to websites you thought everyone knew about, and one to a page that you could never have imagined existed that perfectly solves a problem you never expected to be resolved. 

Walk along Mid-Atlantic beaches right now and you may see odd creatures that look like they belong in the dinosaur age. They’re horseshoe crabs, and scientists worry their numbers are declining.

To gather more information about what’s happening to the crabs, volunteers are dispatched along the coast each year at this time for an annual count.

It’s getting dark, and these sea creatures are lined up for miles on Kitts Hummock Beach near Dover, Del., where they come ashore to spawn.

Horseshoe crabs are sometimes called living fossils because they’ve been around for millions of years and survived when other species didn’t. The females are larger than males, some as big as a dinner plate. The shell has a horseshoe shape and from a few steps back they look like shallow green Army helmets.

It’s Spawning Season: Are Horseshoe Crabs Down For the Count?