there is no pretending

"You’re telling me… You have a ghost in your apartment?"

"Yeah. It's punched me in the throat and pulled my hair so far. Not very fun."

"Oh, model. I see." He smiled lightly. "Dead? Damn, I’m so sorry to hear that, I mean it. I like Scott better, if you don’t mind. What’s your name?"

"It's fun, other than the eight-inch heels." She laughed. "It's fine, I didn't know them very well anyway."  She looked down awkwardly, not being one for sympathy. "I'm Alana. Nice to meet you, Scott."

"That’s what I thought… Couple years ago."

"That sucks. You know, I could be your alive best friend. But be warned, I have a ghost in my apartment who'll probably kill me."

"How much do you need?"

"Are you an actress, model or something like that? Oh, don’t you have any family member or someone around? I would like to help you but I’m a strange to you after all."

"I'm a model. I do commercials in my spare time. And, um, all my family members are dead. You're a cute stranger, though."

"Dead best friend, no biggie."

"I've never gotten that one before. When did she die?"

“Punched you in the throat and pulled your hair? Are you kidding me, right? It’s hard to believe since I don’t believe in ghosts but… why are you staying there? That’s my idea. Get the hell out of there.”

"I don't have anywhere else to go. I have photoshoots here until after next year, and I can't miss them."

"Why not? Sorry to break this to you, but if it’s demonic it’s a hell of a lot stronger than you and will find a way to possess you. At least burn some sage or something. If you end up getting possessed I don’t want you to come after me." 

"What the hell is sage? I won't go after you because I won't be getting possessed. I can tough it out, seriously. I have to; I don't have anywhere else to go. Well, I could fly to Paris but I have shoots here that I can't miss."

"Sorry, you just… you look a lot like someone I used to know"

"Ooh, I love it when people tell me that. Who was it? Sister, ex-girlfriend, lost love?"

"Dude, you have to do something you can’t just tough it out. It’s probably trying to possess you. If you don’t have anywhere to go you should get a priest to come in your place and bless it." 

"No. No. Priests and I do not mix. Plus I'm not letting some punk ass fucking ghost possess me. I can handle myself."

"I don’t really believe in ghosts but whatever you say, girl." He said in a lower voice. "Maybe you should throw salt and holy water to the place."

"I didn't either, but then something punched me in the throat and pulled my hair. That's trippy as hell. I am not fucking up my apartment because of some bitch ass ghost. Any better ideas?"

"Well, actually... we got in a fight and I slept with him to get back at her."

"You sure are."

"I can't believe I hit a cat. I'm a terrible person."

"The flat I used live in was haunted, but the ghost was demonic, I was pretty sure of it when it started grabbing my ankles. So I moved into my boyfriend’s flat and then I bought a haunted doll and now the ghost that’s attached to it walks around the flat. If the ghost hasn’t hurt you or anything you probably have nothing to worry about." 

"It punched me in the throat and it pulls my hair a lot. You're lucky you have a boyfriend; I have no where to go. I'll just tough it out."

"Yeah, that may not have been the most clever thing to say."

"I'm not the most clever person."