At first I thought, wow what a shitty year. Then I started to really reflect on everything and I thought, yep I was right this year was full of poo. AND THEEEEN I stopped writing, went to the bathroom, got a snack, drank some gatorade, got another snack, sat back down in my bed, pondered for a moment, and finally came to some realizations. Sure this year was probably full of the most obstacles, but along with those obstacles came the most growth. I fell into some sort of slump this year. I let stress take over my life. I let failure keep slapping me in the face. I let myself be sad, and stay sad. What happened to the simple and carefree life I used to live? And then I realized that the answer was in my question. Life is no longer simple and carefree. In high school they made it seem like they were doing all they could to prepare us for this “real world” they always spoke of. But in reality, we didn’t have much to worry about. And then boom, we’re thrown in a new environment, forced to grow up and figure out what we want to do with the rest of our lives. We’re expected to know all these things and make no mistakes and waste no time. Talk about stressful, right? I walked without knowing which direction I was facing and before I knew it I ended up lost. I went through the normal “no one understands” and “I don’t know who I am” stages until I started to pick up a pattern. Everyone, in one way or another, is going through the same thing. We may be fighting different battles, but we’re all going through these weird stages as we emerge into adulthood. With all of the stress put on us these days, it’s easy to believe that failure is bad and being lost means wasting precious time. But what I’ve learned is that these feelings are not abnormal. It’s okay to fail, it’s okay to be lost, and it’s okay to feel scared. What matters is what you do from there. Yeah I admit, I gave up a little. I felt like I was falling deeper and deeper down this pit and I didn’t bother to help myself get out of it because I was too afraid to fail even more. It wasn’t until now, 10:00 pm on a Monday night, reflecting on the year, that I realized there is no turning back. I always wished things would become simple again but now I know how silly that is. I’ve finally accepted things for how they are. I’ve freed myself from the imprisonment of my own head, so now I can finally move forward. There is no changing what has happened, but we have the power to control what WILL happen. So here’s to 2013, for growth and for change and for everyone who helped us all get through it. And last but not least, here’s to ourselves. We tend to forget that strength comes from within. There are many things that help us and encourage us, but ultimately it is ourselves that push us forward. So here’s to us, and here’s to the new year. Versace.
pixelskylines
snowghoul
gracieabrams
