bullshit.

To imanentize the eschaton we have to put LSD in the Mormon sacrament water and go up and bear our testimony about how we all need to be transgender ecoterrorist chaos cultists

NPCs in Skyrim just…tell you their whole life story in passing. You don’t even have to talk to them they really just go “my husband was murdered my a mountain troll” and walk right past you

Just like working retail

taylor swift’s only song themes are “i’m a terrible person to be in a relationship with” and “people hate me for no reason”

fuck you feetpicdealer

they hated jesus when he told the truth too

ppl be like "im intellectual bc i dont drink or go to parties" literally all your favourite authors were doing cocaine all the time. except actually probably not bc we know u only read harry potter and jk rowling's drug of choice is transmisogyny

Ladies and gentlemen. I am here to announce a change in tonight's line up. Unfortunately, Food could not be with us tonight. Playing the role of dinner this evening will be a Six Pack of Cheap Beer. No refunds will be given. Please enjoy the show.