𝓈𝓌𝑒𝑒𝓉 / 𝕔𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕥𝕦𝕣𝕖 !

He likes the way her fingers feel in his hair, it’s soothing. He smiles at her words, shrugging lightly. He’ll say it again and again, because it’s true. There’s a pang in his chest when she turns her head away from him. She’s right, of course she’s right — but Levi doesn’t want to act rationally tonight, is that so bad? He’s being selfish, he’s self aware enough to know that, because he’s not the only one who’ll have to pick up the pieces after tonight, she’ll be, too. And he hates to be the cause of that. “Is it really a problem?” he asks quietly, because he’d argue loving someone does that to you, renders you unable to think straight, so that doesn’t necessarily make it a bad thing. But maybe, in their case, it unfortunately is, because every time they reunite, they fall back into each other’s arms, knowingly they’ll have to part ways. It’s something they both know and yet they go against every time. He shakes his head and looks down for a moment, letting out a sigh. “I know that it is,” he agrees now, feeling like he’s losing. He eyes look at her hands as they trail down his arms and eventually drop at her sides. There’s another pang in his heart as a result of her words, but this one is painful and sharp. He’s experienced heart break before, so he knows this is exactly what he’s feeling right now. He also feels like they’re breaking up, despite never actually dating. He hands drop her from cheeks, too  — it’s probably one of the hardest things he ever had to do and he takes a step back, and he has to look away for a moment, because looking at her hurts. He’s strong enough to pull away, but not strong enough to leave. “Fuck, Allie. How am I supposed to — “ Go back inside and pretend like you’re not in the same room? Like everything that happened now didn’t? He stays quiet because he’s smart enough to know his words will only hurt them more and make the situation harder than it already is. He takes another step back and just leans back against the wall, like he’s in need of some support.

        HUDSON CAN TELL FROM ALLIE’S EXPRESSION that his question probably wasn’t a pleasant one, and it’s not like he’s going to ask his ex-girlfriend for more details about her ex. it’s questionable that there’s even a chance she’d want to spend the night willingly at gallagher, but he’ll choose to ignore it, giving her a nod.   “ i promise. i’m not leaving here without you. ”   he means it too, sorry levi.   “ hey, you said it, ”   he points a finger at her, before smiling.   “ do you think we’ll get invitations every year to whatever cool events gallagher has no, as repayment for everything ? ”

“Yeah, honestly... I debated on even coming tonight.” While she loved Beyoncé and Luce with her heart and soul, it was the trauma and memories of last year that frightened her. She didn’t want to say it or jinx it but Harper was scared that they were going to leave tonight with one less person. While they only lost one friend last year, it was one too many. “Okay, so,” Harper began, pushing aside all of her doubts and sadness from just a few seconds ago. “Like I said, this plan requires everyone. First, I’m gonna need you to walk to the middle of the ballroom. When I give you the signal, you have to faint. And not just some pathetic falling over, no, I need it to be dramatic. All eyes on you as you collapse to the ground. Nearby, we’re gonna have Hudson and Imogen ready. They’re both gonna direct all eyes on you and try to call for help. Get the ambulance to come or a medical major, whoever! We just need everyone to be looking at you three for less than a minute.” Harpoon please– “While that’s going on, I’m going to be near the front with Steph. That’s when I’ll hope on stage and introduce myself to Beyoncé and Steph is going to record the moment. By then, her bodyguards will notice us and might try to throw me off the stage. And that’s when! Luce comes in and uses those badass Gallagher spy moves on them.” Her friend has been attending the school for a year now, she believed that the other has picked up on some fighting skills. “Once those guys are down, everyone has to run and get in the car. Where our lovely getaway driver known as VG will be waiting for us.” Boom. “You like it?”

                            the mention of a simulation makes her jaw go slack as if she’s hearing about it for the first time, even though she’s hung out with enough stoners who’ve claimed they’re on the threshold of enlightenment to make it the seventh time. ‘   make sure me and allie have the best night ever !    ’ cranes her neck to where the supposed controller is, because the only way she can wrap her head around a simulated reality is likening it to a game of the sims. ‘   promise i won’t.   ’ smattering kisses all over before she loops her arm in her, all the strength of a chain-linked friendship bracelet. ‘   he’s somewhere … i think he wanted to practice his twerk for beyonce.   ’ a fruitless scan around the room comes up empty, but her gaze lands right back on allie who fills her heart just as much. ‘   if we’re being honest, think i’m getting kicked out like. well, not think. know. which sucks ‘cos i really wanted to stay with — i just really wanted to stay like. but you have to pass your classes, the first time round.   ’

         “ I MEAN, YOU SHOULD GO SAY HI. i’m sure he’d like to see you. ”   because there’s no way levi would not be upset if she chooses to ignore him the entire night. none of his advice really matters anyway, we know how this unfolds. caden hates that he knows levi well enough to know that he’d gladly ignore his gallagher friends for a chance to spend the entire night with allie, which is stupid. she seems like a nice girl and all, but even caden can tell their relationship isn’t exactly healthy.   “ from seeing her ?   yeah, a little. but like i said, we still keep in touch. i care about imogen, ”   he tells her, because one year later, that still hasn’t changed. what would the alternative of his relationship with her be anyway, what levi and allie have ?   “ yeah, i do, ”   caden smiles a little, despite the question feeling pointed.   “ she’s around here somewhere, if you wanna meet her. red hair, will talk to a wall. ”   he hopes they don’t get a chance to meet.

@bcketts​

“Have you tried any of these snacks?” She asks the blonde standing next to her. “I had like three of those macaroons so far. I need to try something else.” She laughs. “I’m a sucker for a good macaroon.”

It’s no surprise the kiss is desperate, especially when Levi’s been desperate to have her in his arms and his lips to hers. He’s always been better in expressing himself through actions, and although he’s said more than he anticipated to Allie tonight, his head is full of so much more unsaid things. So he’s putting his all into the kiss, expressing the intensity of his feelings and need for her through it. It’s a kiss with months of missing one another going into it, it’s a kiss where both of them know what’s coming next. He’s crazy about her and he can’t get enough and it’s evident in the way he’s kissing her — hungry and hard. His arms go around her waist, keeping her as close to him as physically possible, eliminating any space between them, lips melting together. He doesn’t think of the aftermath of the kiss, because right now, the kiss it all that matters and really, he wants to drown himself in Allison Beckett. He doesn’t know how long they kiss, but the moment she pulls away, he desperate to feel her lips on his again. He has to take a short breath, from the force of the kiss alone. He rests his forehead to hers, giving her a slight nod, as if in agreement, though what comes out of his lips is the total opposite, ”I don’t regret it.” Rationally, they shouldn’t have kissed. And yet, Levi has zero regrets. He would do it all again. He would kiss her again. He’s still refusing to really think of the aftermath of this. This time is deeper, too, because they have confessed their feelings. And yet, all Levi’s thinking about is the fact that she’s here and in his arms. He hasn’t had enough of the kiss. He moves to lightly trace his thumb along her lower lip and leans in for another kiss, this one’s shorter, but still passionate, because his self control and self restraint is pretty non existent right now. “You’re making me lose my mind, Allie.” His eyes are alternating between her eyes and her lips, faces still too close. He keeps her close to him — wanting her to remain in his arms. “Fuck, I missed you.”

“i don’t know that it’s either.” every job has the boring bits, he’s almost certain. he doesn’t find his job entirely dull and it keeps him busy, which has been fairly crucial while living alone and over an hour away from his girlfriend. “err…i don’t know, i don’t watch a lot of it.” especially the thrillers and he certainly hadn’t taken spies on film during his one year at gallagher. “at the risk of sounding biased, i did like london spy.” he’s not all that concerned about being offed and shoved into a trunk himself. “and killing eve…both are bbc affiliated, but to me that just means less episodes and more thought put into storylines.” a lot of spy content comes off as sensationalized and cheesy. “physically, yes. that’s all right, i didn’t stop you.” lord knows he could have! “considering it happened yesterday and i nearly bled out…yes, it hurts. i wasn’t scared for myself.”

‘   ow !   ’ she yips, because allie’s squeezing super hard, wondering if she’s just not used to her hugs because she’s gone so long without or if she’s been lifting. ‘   so what’s the consensus. am i real ?   ’  she pushes out through her allie-made fish face, which glubs against her palms every time she tries to smile, which is a lot, especially when she’s treated with a forehead kiss. ‘   and you look like an angel. you always do.    ’ she puckers her lips, trying to escape allie’s clutch even though it feels nice. ‘   you have to let go. i gotta kiss those cheeks otherwise i’m gonna go insane.   ’

“Am I?” There’s disbelief in his tone. He doesn’t believe either of them is stronger than the other when it comes to their relationship. He’s never been able to suppress his feelings for her. “I can’t control myself around you, Allie. I lost focus of everything around me the moment I saw you tonight,” he explains. He holds her gaze when she looks at him. As a result, there’s a silence that hangs. All he wants is to do the right thing, to lessen the hurt both of them are feeling. But he has no idea what the right thing is, it all seems painful for him. Her words make him weaker and weaker. Months of thinking he was doing well moving on, all thrown out of of the window. He never moved on. And he already knows the moment she leaves campus again, she’ll be the only thing he’ll be thinking of for months. And he’ll use partying and alcohol and sleeping around, and eventually, his new job, as a distraction, to bury the feelings that’ll never go away. “I don’t know how to move on from you.” And he tried, he really tried. All he wants to do is reach for her and hold her, act on his urges, because it’s actually killing him how just out of reach she seems. It’s that conflict of staying away and protecting each other versus acting on his feelings. Levi knows once he reaches out, the last shred of control he has left will dissolve. The conversation is getting more and more painful by the second. Their admissions and confessions, their feelings all coming out into the open, the realization that it’ll all have to end tonight as well. It’s the cruel reminder that their different needs, wants and goals in life and their timing will always be a son of a bitch. “Fuck. I don’t know what to do. You think I’m not in love with you still? This is all so damn hard,” he blurts out. And just like that, this is the the first time they both have confessed their love towards each other, and in true Levi and Allie fashion, it comes under stressful and painful conditions. He throws caution to the wind, says fuck it to logic and repercussions, decides to act on his feelings, and reaches for her in a quick and swift motion, cupping her cheeks and pressing his lips to hers hard. And maybe Allie will be the smartest one of the two right now and break it off, because Levi surely has lost any semblance of logic and control. 

        “ HEY, I’M JUST KIDDING, ”   his smile widens as if to show proof, when in reality caden wasn’t kidding at all.   “ but i’m glad to hear it. because it’s his big night, and he should have some fun. ”   and not have to worry about nursing his broken little heart tomorrow during graduation when allie goes back to her normal life.   “ oh, yeah. you know levi, he can handle anything. he killed it. ”   he’s not completely gassing up his friend blindly ;   there’s pride in caden’s voice when he talks about levi’s mission. allie’s pointed tone has caden holding back a roll of his eyes, though he just casually shrugs his shoulders.   “ couldn’t exactly keep in touch with her too well, her being in england and all. ”   unlike levi, caden had known better than to keep close ties with imogen last year after the semester ended, when it was better for them both to keep the ocean of distance between them. harper had been another story, but he is a man. his self-restraint isn’t THAT good.   “ eh, thanks, ”  he says, because caden is trying hard not to think about cyrus tonight. 

“right,” he echoes. unsurprising that she’d remember a detail like that, given the alumni crawling all over campus for much of her time at gallagher. “they’re like tv in all the boring ways.” they’re not shooting at each other from speeding cars most of the time. “a lot of former agents have written books, some of which end up becoming shows.” like mindhunter! “you’d learn more from reading those memoirs than from spending a semester at gallagher where everyone’s lying to you.” gallagher students don’t know anything frankly. “ian fleming wasn’t even a james bond type,” he comments with a snort. personally, grayson prefers chitty-chitty-bang-bang. “well…i’m actually not sure how much i can say. which has nothing to do with spies.” being a first child is far more secretive, with a long list of things to never be discussed publicly. “but i got shot in the process of protecting ruby.” he shrugs, mostly with his good shoulder. “i don’t think the president will be informing the public on what happened.” and well they are in a very public location currently!

        “ YEAH, OF COURSE. ”   hudson has no qualms driving all of his friends home, if for no other reason than to make sure they all leave gallagher academy in one piece.   “ i take it you’re not, uh, still seeing that guy here ? ”   he doesn’t know much about that, but has heard enough to know it could be a potential thing.   “ i would hope she better security detail than you, ”   he laughs, shaking his head.   “ this will easily be the coolest thing i’ve ever done. since we can’t brag about training with spies or any of that. ”

“  thanks , ”  the  little  smile  that  comes  is  genuine ,  soft  as  her  voice  is  quiet .  “  you ,  too . ”   a  small  squeeze  of  their  hands .  allie  and  imogen  were  always  bonded ,  first  as  best  friends ,  then  as  potential  soon  to  be  sisters  through  jeremy …  and  even  without  him ,  that  doesn’t  go  away .  but  they’re  also  bonded  in  the  way  they’d  both  left  boys  here  who  perhaps  mean  more  to  them  than  they’ll  admit .  facing  them  again  is  difficult  and  scary ,  even  if  they  weren’t  at  gallagher ,  but  since  they  are ,  it’s  even  more  difficult  and  scary .  imogen’s  index  finger  will  gently  tap  at  allie’s  forehead  once  or  twice ,  because  maybe  she’s  a  LITTLE  sweaty .  “  it’s  warm  in  here ,  that’s  all .  ”  she’ll  nod ,  convincing  herself .  “  i  just …  i  feel  like  if  we’re  going  to  bail  we  need  to  do  it  NOW . ”  a  nervous  laugh ,  she’s  tempted .  “  no  —  ignore  me .  we  should  stay ,  at  least  for  one  drink ,  anyways .  see  how  we  feel  after …   we’ll  be  fine .  ”  now  she  just  can’t  stop  rambling .  “  let’s  just  find  some  . ”  a  small  sigh  as  she  starts  walking  a  bit  closer  to  where  she  thinks  the  drinks  are .  

“it’s…it wasn’t as bad as where i’d transferred from, so.” if anything, he least enjoyed the attention garnered from being both a berkshire and a gallagher, and having to fake the american accent for half his time there had also been less than ideal. “you don’t really know anything that interesting, in fairness. being a federal agent is not a private career. haven’t you seen any movies or tv shows? fbi have to flash their badges all the time.” it might be a different story if the witness protection students had also been around for the burn book. “i have a desk job at the nsa, allie, i’m by all accounts a normal bloke.” which was by design. “probably, it was romantic, and all.” she allegedly fell down a bunch of stairs and out of a window, actually, which is hilarious.

        “ REALLY ?   THAT’S WEIRD, ”   caden says casually – far too casually for it to not have been a set-up.   “ you’re not here to break my boy’s heart, are you ?   because he’s been through enough this year. he was sent on a mission to the uk, actually. i probably shouldn’t be telling you this. ”   except caden is an amazing wingman, so all he does is lower his voice a little and continue.   “ he saved, like, all these hostages that had been abducted by these bad guys. had to fight his way out. ”   alright, maybe he’s exaggerating a little. caden would keep going, but the question of imogen makes him pause, shaking his head.   “ i have, yeah. we still keep in touch. ”   which caden assume she knows, since he flew imogen out for this.   “ it’s not that big, ”   he counters.   “ ah, yeah. that was an accident, though. it wasn’t anything… evil. ”   he’ll spare her the secret society arc.

“Not surprised by that.” The gardens fit into Allie’s aesthetic. Honestly if Harper had her phone, she would be out there taking millions of pictures of her friend each and every day. “Yeah, it looks like Gallagher is just trying to cover up their traumatizing shit and show everyone how nice they look,” Harper said as she rolled her eyes. But she will give the school credit for what they did for Cassie. “Good because I actually do have a plan. It involves the entire crew. Ready for it?”