About Nothing And Everything All At Once

This place will forget me as it has forgotten the many children who shed years of their lives with friends they made in unexpected corners of classrooms and on the rugged streets of Katipunan. How fleetingly beautiful; how beautiful and sad.

It's been a long time ago since I saw you. Others might dismiss what I felt as a silly high school crush but I still look for you in everything and everyone today.

I think I'm getting better at appreciating what I have.

I can't believe this happened to me today. I feel so happy yet there is a part of me that questions if I deserve this.

I have given you so much and I am none poorer for it

It's not that I didn't want to see you. If anything, I've been wanting to see you again since you left. It's just I don't want you to see me in this state. I've let go of myself and I despise it.

These days I've been full of anger. Sometimes it blisters like the burning sun while at other times it makes me feel like I'm drowning in my own frustrations. Maybe it's the stress from school but maybe this anger has always been inside of me. My anger consumes me so much it makes me feel paralyzed. I don't know what to do with this anger. It feel like the world is conspiring against me and now I feel I must defeat it just to spite it.

My desire is immense and as such, embarrassing. It consumes me and forces me to confront how needy I am, how much I just want to be known.

School is starting to get difficult again but it's ok. I have my friends, however dispersed they may be in different clusters and groups.

I miss you even if it doesn't make sense since we were never that close

Before I might have thought that this is beneath you but now it seems that it's very much in character.

That's so embarrassing for you.

I realize that people are where they are for a reason.