Boo!

I knew the second you got the pink glitter stickers in preschool that we all stood NO CHANCE. But she is a little mad that she can’t see you. She misses her Barry. Better make sure she doesn’t forget your face.

…wow that’s a lot. So he’s….your…cousin’s son? And how do we feel about that side of the family…reaching out?

Cass or Theo’s hair?

She could never. I’ll face time her before bed.

He calls me his uncle because it’s easier than saying cousin’s cousin or whatever it makes him. It’s fine. They’re not my favorite people in the world, but I like Dion. This is for his safety. He’s welcome for as long as he needs. Theo and I aren’t strangers to housing vagrant children who wind up at our door.

Especially Asher. The only two I think are safe are you and Cass.

Oh…wait, he’s from your dad’s side?

Deep Thing bounces back easily. You all underestimate his emotional maturity.

I’m so offended for her.

Not even Cass if Boo gets pissed enough. I revel in my invulnerability. All of you mocked our special relationship, but I’m still reaping the benefits.

He’s my dad’s sister’s daughter’s son. They’re the Canadian side of the family. Distant, but recently reconnected via our new, resident punk boy.

I’m going to be checking Rose and Piper’s windows for the rest of my life. Both for boys sneaking in and one particularly big pain in the ass boy trying to sneak out.

He’s a Winchester, all right. Has he been introduced to Deep Thing?

Please show Cass. And film it.

Rose will whack anyone who tries with a bat. Including Asher.

Technically, he’s a Miller. No, I don’t want Deep Thing getting attached to someone who’s going to leave eventually.

Oh right, the one that snuck into your niece’s bedroom in the dead of night? And you thought you’d only have to beat that one boy away.

It’s marginally better than him rubbing shit on the walls. So…plus side.

What? No, Dion’s not like that. He’s just... got initiative. He’s a problem solver. Door’s broken? Climb the window.

I like that he can do that with several of you around. I’m assuming the dye was Cass’? Cass clearly didn’t have a hand in it or it’d look sick.

I’ve been busy. I have a cousin in town. I give someone else the slightest bit of attention, and Theo goes and rubs shit in his hair. These Ramsays, I swear.

He….tried. He certainly tried.

He didn’t even try to do a fun color. He’s blond. He wouldn’t even have to bleach it. I’m so personally offended.

Theo: Baby it's not what it looks like!

Theo: Okay it is, I thought it would look good.

He started it.

Go take a good look at your husband. 

Hold on.

Barry!

Makes sense. They’re literally copies of one another. Except one takes care of their hair when they dye it,

Don’t be rude.

So you agree he’s a plague.

….kids? Are you calling Theo a kid? Because if so, that’s hilarious.

Alex!

Then YOU take him.

Absolutely not. The kids and I have already discussed how I can’t allow a plague into my home.

Then let HIM go to YOUR HOUSE and lick YOUR COMMUNAL FRUIT

Rethink this…..Nope. Still gonna kill him.

But consider this. I’ll spend every moment from the day he dies crying in your ear.

Well, it’d just be silly if I got called Barry.

Hey come on, you’re hot shit to me.

Shut up and get your voice ready. I’ll fetch the kids.

I am absolutely going to murder my youngest.

I’d rethink your positioning there.

I’m the nicest uncle, fuck you.

Dion already makes me feel old, did you see his hair? God he looks like you. Let’s do it.

Who gets called “My Barry”?