barrow witch

Stepping out of your cockpit and stumbling because you don't have the right number of legs.

Blinking your eyes out of sync because you don't have the right number anymore, don't have access to on board cameras the way you're supposed to.

Struggling to grab and pick things up because you have the wrong number of fingers.

Failing to recognize your face in the mirror without layers of armor plating over it.

"Transition Games: Speedrunning Gender" by Madison Schmalzer

Gretchen Felker-Martin’s (2020) Eva inspired mecha novella Dreadnought, for instance, deals more directly with similar trans themes of the horrors of embodiment through the teenage piloted militarized mechas...

Dreadnought pilot Leah, for instance, has an extremely troubled relationship with her body due to her weight and how she is treated because of it. She understands her mech, Gemini, as her actual body: “That’s my real body, Leah thought…That’s my blood” (pg. 13). She is perfectly “in sync” with Gemini and has the highest “biofeedback compatibility” that allows her to become “perfect” and “beautiful” in her violent movements. Being able to synchronize with that mechanical body is her ultimate goal.

(Schmalzer, pg. 175)

it's a 211 page dissertation written by a trans speedrunner talking about the trans experience and speedrunning and making connections between the two

also if you know the (now-removed) tweet thread that inspired the "You're a beta male, Sonic" video, this paper also dunks on that (starting on pg. 50)

My arthritis: PAIN