Itās been 5 days and Iām still crying⦠I think I loved him⦠I didnāt allow myself to fall completely because I knew he was detached in many ways⦠but we were still developing a friendship. Today I got full clarity with him where we stand. And he just wants to be friends. Something in my gut is telling me he didnāt like me. And now heās relieved that itās over. Heās so distant I feel like all access has been cut.
Iāve started working out. Iām on day 3 and it feels good to do something. But I come home and Iām alone. With no one to talk to or text or be cute with. I have $100 worth of new underwear I was so excited to wear for him and now they are just sitting there freshly washed and ready to be worn. I was getting my apartment ready for him to finally come over and spend time with me up here. Iām still going to get ready but I was so excited to share my space when it was doneā¦
All I want to do is kiss him and touch him and laugh and watch movies and be in his space while I do my own thing. Iām crying randomly again⦠I feel like Iām back in 2022ā¦
I feel silly falling for a man who couldnāt love meā¦


















