you're so totally deluded

my workout routine: - jumping to conclusions

I want to own one of these someday. Just because.

FUXKSJSFJDHD

*takes a free sample twice* i love robbery and fraud

what kind of camera are you using this is like movie quality god damn

HE SOUNDS SO SAD PUT hIM BACK

im about to get so tan you guys 

- Icarus’s last words 

i fuckin hate that emoji face that’s laughing and crying at the same time, people will put it on literally anything like my friends were planning a picnic and someone was like ‘i’ll bring some crisps’ and used that face as if you would actually laugh so hard that u cried at the idea of bringing crisps to a picnic

the sun doesn’t have to go to college bc it already has 28 million degrees

i like to tell people when i need to go pee