Bandit Nanna

“Are you speakin’ to me? Are you sayin’ things at me? Stop sayin’ stuff about me? Shut it!”

Classic Taxi Driver.

Oliver Gunnington Solskjaer. You know, he was great coming off the bench to score. Literally he would jump off a bench and do a header. Remember when they had benches all over the pitch?

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Paul Scholes’ greatest moments. I only had room for nine so I had to leave out that time his willy fell out.

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Ah Eric! He was known as “L’enfant Terrible” which means Terrible Elephant in French. I think it was because he had a big Gallic nose. Bit racist if you ask me. 

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Relive Martin Tyler filling his trousers with Danger Milk with this lovely smug-shot of Tony M.

Little know fact. Game makers actually toyed with the idea of making an actual beat-em-up around Cantona’s exploits at Selhurst Park where he would earn points by kicking the shit out of the crowd and bizarrely fighting a 10ft ‘Rainbow God’ called ‘Martin Wimbledon’.

Look at Ferris casually poised above UNITED. That must be killing his abs. You can’t tell from his nonchalant face though. Classic Ferris.

Deutschland, Deutschland über alles…

I reckon there’s an alternative version of Gremlins in which rather than a Mogwai the dad brings home Juan Mata in a box.

When break dancing, football and tapas combine.

I’m thinking about penning a musical based on United’s win in Barcelona 1999. Gary Wilmot as Dwight Yorke, Ian McShane as Sir Ferguson. Solskjaer will be played by Bjork.