Art and Ikemen

must feel good as fuck to curse a prince for being rude to you while you were larping as an old woman for no reason

TRAGEDY: every member of a once-flourishing group chat is now employed

Thinking about when I worked at a shitty restaurant + one night it was just me + 3 other women on closing shift, so some guy came in the back and waved a knife around, presumably for money but I’m not actually certain, bc he was met with the bartender holding a much bigger knife, a tiny teenager wielding a cast iron pan, an elderly woman holding up a crockpot of clearly boiling water, and me, turning on the meat slicer with eye contact for maximum effect. He left, but the moral of the story is not girl power or whatever, it’s just. Why the fuck would you threaten a room full of underpaid and sleep-deprived blue-collar workers surrounded by lethal weapons.

*nods wisely* not the sharpest knool in the shed

Bringing a knife to a lots-o-knives fight

time loop with two people in it but one person refuses to acknowledge the loop and pretends to be looping with everyone else. meanwhile the other person is freaking out

is he … you know … open to interpretation?

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Hey…. Hey… Characters covered in blood, okay? You remember characters covered in blood?? You used to love characters covered in blood

Named the new stray cat outside Footwater because he likes to stand in the birdbath and drink his own foot water.