ahhhhhhh

Getting divorced and re-married is like starting a game over so you can go with the mage instead of the warrior.

hmm has anyone seen my locomotive filled with male models

ive lost my train of thot

i hate this

I love this

Hnnrggh colonel im trying to keep a pair of jeans for more then 6 months but im dummy thick and the clap of my thighs keeps making holes

BIG FUKKEN MOOD

YES

I’m fucking cackling guys

what a strange cat

i’ve been trying to construct a joke with naruto’s “believe it” and mulder’s “i want to believe” but thats about as far as i get…

Of course!! She was the pride and joy of the park. She probably had an audience when she hatched. She imprinted on people, not dinosaurs. Her whole life she was given her proteins handed to her, she has never had to really hunt to survive. She is like a captive-bred tiger. She probably had favorite human handlers. She could tell which humans were the nasty one. Reframe the movie where Rexy (that’s what I’m calling her) is just as scared as the humans that the power went out, that things were falling apart. She was exploring outside her habitat. She wanted to play with the jeeps. Maybe she wanted to help get the small human out of jeep? Be free, tiny humans! Come back, tiny humans! Don’t fall off the cliff, tiny humans! The lawyer smelled bad. Rexy really disliked his smell. He tried to hide it on the toilet, but her nose easily found him. He didn’t taste as good as goat, though. His stinky clothes gave her a stomach ache for days. Rexy tried to figure out where the humans went. She found them at the visitors center. And when she got there, a rude raptor wanted to pick a fight with her. No! Get off my back. What is this thing falling on me??? Someone bring me a goat, I’m hungry!

HEADCANON ACCEPTED