Middle aged professional male who enjoys being a firm guiding hand and listening ear for young ladies needing advice, structure, guidance, supervision and/or the occasional (or not-so-occasional) firm hand across their behind. v2.0
The Stonewall Inn

pixel skylines
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Andulka

blake kathryn

izzy's playlists!
One Nice Bug Per Day
macklin celebrini has autism
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Love Begins
★
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shark vs the universe
Misplaced Lens Cap

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club

#extradirty
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@badlifeadvicegiven
Middle aged professional male who enjoys being a firm guiding hand and listening ear for young ladies needing advice, structure, guidance, supervision and/or the occasional (or not-so-occasional) firm hand across their behind. v2.0

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For the August post, here are my confessions. What will my sentence be? Scold me!
Name swats = 51
Additional = 10 (for being distracted while reading the post 😇)
Subtotal = 61
But there are other things from July weighing on me…
- cussing/using profanity a lot, and including accidentally using a big swear in front of children at work
- rolling my eyes at an older man friend
- wearing a vibrator in public and while driving
- going to bed late, particularly because I was on my phone despite needing to be up early for work the next day…this happened multiple times
Looks like it wasn't a good month for you! Let's deal with these things in order of severity from my perspective... 1. A vibrator in public, naughty, but not necessarily a big deal. A vibrator WHILE DRIVING, on the other hand....VERY big deal. When you're behind the wheel of a vehicle your responsibility is to your passengers AND all other people on/along the road you're traveling on. Your full focus belongs on the highway and I somehow doubt, if you're using a vibrator, that your full focus was on the road. DId you give any thought to how dangerous things could have been for you or others had you lost concentration due to the vibrator at the wrong moment? You or someone else could have been hurt. Perhaps seriously so! That shortsightedness adds 25 to your total. 2. Profanity, especially in front of children who likely look up to you as a role model and who will pattern their behavior and views of what is acceptable based off what they see from you. Obviously you know better or you wouldn't have included it on the list of things bothering you from the month. There's a simple solution here...10 swats added and you'll have a bar of soap in your mouth while your swats for August are delivered. 3. Repeatedly staying up late. Obviously this is a pattern that would be best solved by a bedtime and daily punishment each time the bedtime is violated and you stay up later. Set one and then if you violate it, you owe 1 swat per minute that you missed it by applied to your bottom the following morning. Put the phone down! Oh..and 15 swats for the problem from this past month. 4. Eye rolling at an older male friend. Sadly he didn't handle matters on the spot, so let's add 5 swats as a reminder to keep your demeanor respectful and your attitude in check when in public. You are a reflection of those who have raised you. Honor them in all that you do.
Motivation and maintenance, the August edition...
Start with your first and middle names that would be used if you are scolded. Count 1 for each consonant and 5 for each vowel. That is your starting number of swats.
Add 10 swats if you didnt make your bed this morning. Add another 10 if you didnt brush your teeth. If you cant be trusted with small daily responsibilities, how am I to trust you with larger ones?
Add 10 more if you didnt eat 2 meals yssterday. Make it 25 if you didnt eat a single meal and illness wasnt the reason why. Your health is important to me. It should be to you as well.
Add 10 if you lost your temper and said something to someone you should not have. You control the emotions. They do not control you.
Add 30 if you used a firework in a dangerous or unsafe manner in the past month. You may think you got away with it, but the bill just came due!
Add 20 if you are a student who has a summer reading list that you havent started yet. We will not have procrastination again this term!
Are you touching or playing with yourself while you read this? Add 10 swats. You'll not be distracted while I am talking with you!
Miss the deadline for a bill payment or work/school project in July? Ten swats. People need to be able to trust you and you need to realize your word is your bond and your honor. Adhere to deadlines so folks know you are trustworthy.
Anything else from July weighing heavily on youe mind or conscience? Post it below to receive your sentence and scolding.
Tally up your number of swats and pay up on your bared bottom. These are the rules and they are NOT debatable. I will see you again next month because I care.
Friday fantasy -- Let's play doctor. You need a shot in your bottom, and if you're not a good patient, you'll need spanked after the appointment for not being a good girl. On the other hand...if you WERE a good girl, daddy might kiss the owwie. Or something close to it.
Misbehavior at school means a trip out behind the barn at home. I do hope this young lady receives a proper wearing out with a leather strap since it appears the school did a poor job enforcing its disciplinary code.

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Today's Life Advice -- Never plan out your day. It prevents the word "premeditated" from being used in the courtroom later.
Today's Life Advice -- Don't procrastinate. Instead, simply wait until panic improves your focus.
Young lady, I told you to clean your room! But since you chose to ignore me, now there are going to be consequences. You'll be wanting to point that fan somewhere else by the time I finish teaching you how to listen!
Today's Life Advice -- if you've had too much to drink, be sure to convert the amount to dog beers for anyone who asks.
It isnt a corner, but clearly we all know what that bottom will soon be in for.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Okay, all you closet spanko types officially gave me my 1,000th reblog overnight (hat tip to @abanabani-blog for being the magical 1,000th). Just for that, you get this sore red-bottomed young lurker writing "I will like and reblog you, Sir" a grand total of 1,000 times. Better hurry up and finish those lines, girl, before the reblog crew gets to 2,000!
It was at about that moment she began wishing she had not decided to act like a brat on their evening walk...
I have always found it adds something if the young lady is made to ask for her punishment. I'm not talking about her coming up and asking to be spanked. I am talking after you've scolded her. After you've reminded her of the rules. After you've made abundantly clear what your behavioral expectation in that situation is. Once all of that is done and she understands the why -- make her ask for the correction. Have her tell you not to stop just because she is crying. Hear her tell you not to listen to her pleas. Have her ask for punishment. And then, because you treasure her, deliver exactly what she has asked for and blister her bare butt until she can't sit comfortably. And there better be no hard feelings, because you did precisely as she asked.
Such a delightful target offered so wonderfully...that one stripe along the undercurve at the base of her cheeks is going to be particularly fun to sit on and for her panties to rub against.
Today's Life Advice -- Your true friends are the people who get mad at the same things you do.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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The round of 32 has finished. If your team went out, someone owes you 32 swats on your bare behind. These are the rules. No arguing.
I'm sorry, but you know how this works. Our team gets a red card, you get a red bottom...