SMASH TO SMITHEREENS

my last two brains cells

Trans-inclusive gender-neutral anatomy talk is funny because it makes the human body sound so casual and recreational. "If you happen to have a dick" like one would happen to have a bag of golf clubs somewhere around here. Like you have one of those for hobby purposes or something. Got an uterus because it came with the house and you haven't gotten around to hiring a professional to get that removed.

When I sell "Men and Women's" lingerie stuff with dick space has Room In The Front and directing to kink event washrooms is Standing Optional and Seating Room Only

Your knight husband has finally returned from the long fought battle, defending the kingdom and your small village from its warring neighbors. He arrives late in the evening as you’re preparing for bed, the heavy knock on the door startles you, and your heart has barely calmed down before he’s barreling through the door. Nearly taking you to the ground, his grip is like a vice in an attempt to bring you closer to him, your face is pressed firmly up against the cool metal of his chest plate. So eager to rush back home he never stopped to remove his armor, the thought of embracing his lover again driving him nearly mad, almost feral. You relax into his embrace and allow your knight to take all of your weight as you go limp in relief to see them home safe and sound. His hold tightens, you can feel the heat of his breath on your neck as he pants, more than likely exhausted from his journey home. You feel slightly flush at the sensation, it’s been months since you’ve last seen one another, little known felt each others touch. You attempt to pull back to address him properly but find his grip constricts you further, you can barely move your arms from where they’re held against your sides. The rumble of a growl can be heard over your racing heart, and felt through the steel of his armor against your flush cheek. Lifting your head you see a pair of glowing amber eyes boring into you, barely visibly behind blown out pupils. Your knight’s teeth are bared and pointed, breathing strained through his teeth, every exhale a growl that becomes deeper and more brutal. Dazed in shock you barely register the hand coming up to grip your chin, the sharp press of nails into your skin, nails a lot more pointed than you remember. He tilts you head back further, leaving him enough room to fully burry his face in the crook of your neck. A wet tongue is lapping against skin, savoring the taste, feeling the gentle thrum of your pulse. You whimper as he continues to lavish your neck with long strokes oh his tongue in between tiny nips and sucks. You don’t know what’s happened to your sweet knight but you dare not stop him, for the need to feel his touch consumes you whole.

Mark Zuckerberg got his dong sucked so good his splooge hit all the facebook servers and blew them up