I've been thinking for a long time about writing more about being in the wedding industry and things I've learned from photographing weddings for 7.5 years.
Here is a list of 10 lessons I've learned that help make a wedding YOUR wedding, and that make my job a delight:
1. Know what you and your partner want and don't want and why you're having a wedding. What is the wedding day really about? Is it about the celebration of the union of the two of you? Is it about the celebration of two families coming together? Is it about pleasing your family who would love for you to have a wedding rather than that elopement that you two really want? Did you have a small courthouse wedding and now wanting a casual party to celebrate? Making that distinction and then making decisions with this in mind can really help ease the stress. Couples often get overwhelmed because they are trying to please everyone.
2. Celebrate your quirks/talents/loves and incorporate it into the wedding. Holly + Chris are both musical and Chris is a huge Star Wars nerd. They decided to have their friends form a marching band from their ceremony site to the reception site as the band played the Star Wars theme music. YESSSS! There was a summer wedding I shot this year where the bride loved animals. Their wedding had a petting zoo. SO FUN.
3. Really think about trends you're wanting to incorporate into the wedding. Are they meaningful to you and your partner or did you just see it on Pinterest and thought it was cute? There was a couple that had succulents as their wedding favor. Yes, trendy. But the bride and her mom propagated and grew all of them themselves. Very sweet.
4. Be realistic about your budget and time! I mean, this is a given for most couples. Prioritize expenses and cut out stuff at the bottom of the list, especially if you and your partner are paying for it yourselves. Don't forget to budget in your honeymoon if you're going to have one!
5. Have a timeline for the day-of and make sure EVERYONE involved is on the same page. I cannot stress this enough. I've had mixed timelines which has caused for some stressful moments for both myself and others. Please please please, include your photographer in your timeline discussions if photography is a high importance for your wedding day. A seasoned wedding photographer will have no problem helping create a timeline. Personally, I delight in it!
6. Don't be afraid to mix it up. Are your friends and family notoriously late for every event? Or maybe parking is really bad around the area? Have cocktail hour first so they have a full hour to arrive and mingle (but don't tell them ahead of time, we want people to be on time). If you and your partner want, mingle as well! This is a great way to maximize chances of getting to greet and chat with all your guests, especially any that have travelled far or elderly guests that will want to hightail it out as soon as the ceremony is over.
7. Tell your photographer the things you two really care about in terms of the wedding day. This is a question I ask all of my clients. It would be a shame to miss out on details like a necklace of a loved one that has passed that was on your bouquet or missing out on a picture with your childhood friend that flew half way across the world to be at your wedding. Did all your friends and family pitch in to help decorate? Did you design the invites, program, and menu? Tell your photographer that! They'll make note to photograph it in a meaningful way.
8. For the sanity of your wedding photographer and better photos, please have an unplugged wedding ceremony! It kills me to see/photograph a sea of glowing faces lit from devices during a ceremony. That uncle that loves to take photos? Please tell him to put his camera away for the ceremony. Have your officiant invite your guests to be fully present and to silence and put electronic devices away until the ceremony has concluded.
9. Treat your vendors kindly, particularly the ones that are there all day and run a one-person show (wedding planners, DJ's, photographers, videographers). Offer snacks, meals, and drinks. If they're fed and hydrated, they will do a better job, trust me. If they offer meetings, take it. Meet them. Talk to them. Get to know them. Engagement photos? Highly recommended. It helps build a familiarity on both sides which in turn typically result in better wedding photos. Photographers are documenting a very intimate and personal day in your life. They're going to use everything they have gathered about you and your partner to provide photographs that represent your love. So the more they know, the more accurate the representation.
10. Who doesn't like being thanked?! Thank people and give credit where it is due. This includes thank you cards to your guests that contributed gifts, a personal thanks to family or friends that lent a hand in making the day happen, a thanks to any hired help at your wedding, and thanking/crediting makeup artists, hair stylists, florists, wedding planners, photographers, and videographers when posting wedding photos on social media. Did you have great service? Write them a glowing review! It absolutely helps small businesses and is always appreciated. When you value the people that contributed to your wedding, your wedding will feel that much more memorable and special.
If you were nodding your head while reading through this and need a wedding photographer, I am here for you. Also, here is something I wrote on the value of a wedding photographer from January 2012.
