when i joined tumblr, i had no idea how much it would mean to me this far down the line. i've spent eight years on this site in one capacity or another and it has taught me so much about artistic theory, sociopolitical movements, and the power of intercontinental connection. once a bored teenager looking for a site to kill time and spread gospel of the lame things i liked, surely that time would pass and this site would host my love of writing with each poem and essay reblogged/posted. the coolest people would discover my blog and from there they'd message me and i’d reply and soon we were friends. eventually we'd all grow into adults and some of us would fall out of touch but even watching them prosper from afar and reach the goals they'd dream aloud in text was still enough to warrant registering here. 

however, the rate of tumblr's quality has dropped. a lot of the activity has dimmed, spam bots run rampant, and now a ban has been ordered on all NSFW (“photorealistic imagery of exposed genitals and FEMALE-PRESENTING NIPPLES”) content. the moment the latter was announced weeks ago, i knew the hourglass of interest on this site had begun to drain quick. while much concern was voiced in regards to the disgusting amounts of child pornography on here for quite some time now, the solution many had in mind involved more moderators, a bigger team of watchdogs and whistleblowers for tackling that plus the hate blogs. instead, tumblr decided to chuck all of that in the trash in favor of a lazier fix: literally deleting and outright banning any and all depictions of nudity.

all of this despite the fact that fascist blogs are still fully intact/active, as well as fan blogs devoted to serial killers that some even go as far to glamorize their body counts. they’ve held off on training their authority to do their jobs and decided to clean up this place by nuking everything. not only that, but they’ve seared the phrase "female-presenting nipple" into our brains as if 2018 wasn't bad enough already. be sure to mind your step when wading through all the posts tagged “ted bundy”, you might catch sight of a breast! a WOMAN’s breast!! the horror!!! cross your fingers the autopsy edits covered in hearts will shield you from any female-presenting nipples.

so many talented erotic illustrators rely on this site for income after years of building their portfolios here; the same applies to sex workers, photographers, and even cosplay models that have been affected by this brutally impulsive move. it's tough to hold the devotion i once felt for this place when the powers that be have shown they no longer respect the users that once curated official staff pages. so with that said, now is when i let those of you who still visit know that all my sand has pooled at the bottom and thus an exit sign has been cast. i cannot in good faith continue posting in this place when those in charge now rule with a swift and despotic fist.

2018 was a year of closeness, dysfunction, outrage, and separation. while it’s unfortunate this place couldn’t dodge that course, i am blessed with what tumblr gave me before we’d part. this place was a lively refuge of much-needed company and inspiration back when my world was once an atrium of vice, self-loathing, and blood. that miserable 16-year-old choking back bottles of pills and pinot noir is 24 now, healthy and at peace thanks to the good people i’ve met here -- sarah, astrid, lark, gwen, faryal, anna, and all the others! while many have left for greener and greater pastures, i’ll hold memories of each meeting close to my heart fondly and always. 

my instagram will stay active, as will my twitter and so on. i'll leave this post up and this blog intact, but the time to log off has come. long live online friendship, artistic expression, and shame on this site for issuing such a repressive order on international sex workers' day of all days.

FIN.