since playback is shutting down just watch the games here https://thetvapp.to/ OR here https://tvpass.org/
wallacepolsom
todays bird

Kiana Khansmith
One Nice Bug Per Day
🩵 avery cochrane 🩵
𓃗
Mike Driver
macklin celebrini has autism

izzy's playlists!
trying on a metaphor
sheepfilms
Jules of Nature
cherry valley forever

JVL
Monterey Bay Aquarium
official daine visual archive
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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@authentic-girl03
since playback is shutting down just watch the games here https://thetvapp.to/ OR here https://tvpass.org/

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Making Waves
*this was requested by @mattsfavlesbian! HERE is the post*
Word Count: 6k (mhm yup)
Summary: In which you are Oliver’s best friend and he brings you to Gabi’s birthday. You meet Chris, and the night ends differently than you thought.
CW: 🔞Explicit Sexual Content (Smut): Dom!Chris, unprotected sex, hand job, dry humping, choking, praise kink, public sex, spit kink, if I forgot anything please let me know! If under 18, I am not responsible for the media you consume. (MDNI)
You finally step out of your car; the first thing you notice is how big the house is. The second is that you can hear loud laughter and music thumping from the backyard. There’s something calming about the sun beating down on your skin and hearing light splashes from people jumping into the pool. You pause for a second before knocking on the front door; you’re so anxious, you’ve never met this group of people before. You aren’t an influencer by any means, just a simple childhood friend who got lucky enough to be invited to the party. As soon as you knock, the door slams open, and you’re tackled in a hug by Oliver.
“[Y/N]! God, I’ve missed you.” He has the biggest smile on his face. You follow him into the living room, and it isn’t overly packed, but there are a decent number of people in it. The only two you recognize are Gabi and Josh because Oliver introduced you to them earlier, when you were visiting in LA. There are balloon displays and streamers all over the room. It’s honestly very beautiful and looks very expensive. There’s a decent playlist with all sorts of genres so everyone has something to listen to, and it reminds you of staying up late with Oliver, dancing in his bedroom.
The body of 18 year old Nolan Xavier Wells has unfortunately been found after he went missing from Horn Island, Mississippi. Wells went boating with a group of boys — the rest of the party being white — on July 4th, but he was the only one who didn’t return to shore.
It is becoming increasingly dangerous to be the only black person in a group. Rest in peace, Nolan. You deserve justice.
Update:
I’ve found his family’s GoFundMe for his funeral and celebration of life expenses. This campaign was created by their family friend Allayah Denis and is the only campaign they have, all others are fraudulent. They haven’t reached their goal yet, and funeral expenses are an incredible burden, so if you have the means please consider donating.
In Loving Memory of Nolan Xavier Wells Our hearts are broken beyond words. … Allayah Denis needs your support for In Loving Memory of
As of right now there appears to be no investigation yet, but hopefully there will be soon. Mississippi representative Bennie G. Thompson has publicly urged authorities for an investigation on his social media. If you have any more information please let me know. I’ll put any further updates in a reblog.
*Alt text has now been added to the original images.
Paige such a white girl dancing 😂
times azzi fudds muscles stopped me in my tracks and i fainted

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Azzi fudd x whimsical! Black! Reader
Just some cute headcanons of miss fudd with a whimsy gf.
-The woman has my whole heart istg I need dat.
They look so good but all jokes aside is this not a little bit weird?? Like the people watching for her at their hotel, that tmz guy, etc..
we obviously dk where they were at but “how did you know I was coming HERE though” tells you enough, it doesn’t even look like theres other fans around.
The language between us 1
Pairing: Dean Di Laurentis x Deaf!reader
Summary: Dean never expected a simple accident in a crowded university hallway to stay on his mind for days. After an unexpected encounter with a girl he can’t stop thinking about, he’s left questioning how much he takes communication for granted. Determined to make things right, Dean embarks on a journey that might change far more than just one first impression.
The first thing Dean noticed wasn’t her face.
It was the silence.
Briar University was chaos between classes.
Lockers slammed shut.
People shouted across the hallway.
Someone’s speaker blasted music that probably wasn’t allowed on campus.
The hockey team was arguing about practice.
Football players crowded the entrance, laughing loud enough to echo through the building.
It was the kind of noise Dean had grown used to.
He was laughing at something Logan had said over text while balancing an iced coffee in one hand and his phone in the other.
Logan: If you’re late again, Coach is making you skate until you cry.
Dean snorted.
Dean: Worth it.
Without looking up, he rounded the corner.
Straight into someone.
Books flew everywhere.
A notebook slid halfway down the hallway.
Colored pens scattered across the polished floor.
“Oh, shit.” Dean nearly dropped his coffee as he immediately crouched down. “I’m so sorry.”
He reached for a textbook before another student stepped on it.
“I wasn’t looking.” Still kneeling, he handed it to its owner.
Only then did he actually look at her.
She was beautiful.
Not in the way girls usually tried to be on campus.
No heavy makeup.
No perfectly curled hair.
No outfit screaming for attention.
She looked…
Soft. Comfortable.
Her oversized cream sweater covered most of her hands, and a pair of headphones rested around her neck—not over her ears.
Dean noticed the detail without really thinking about it.
She accepted the book with a small smile.
He smiled sheepishly.
“I swear I’m not usually this clumsy.” Nothing.
No “It’s okay.”
Nothing at all.
Dean blinked.
“…Seriously?”
She continued gathering her things.
He frowned.
Had she just… Ignored him?
His ego took the tiniest hit.
“I said I’m sorry.” She finally looked up.
Her eyes met his.
Then she lifted her hands.
Her fingers moved gracefully.
Quickly. Confidently.
Dean stared.
“…Uh…” She repeated the movements slower.
His eyebrows pulled together.
“I…”
Another sentence.
More signs.
Dean felt completely lost.
“I don’t understand.” She stopped.
For just a second, disappointment crossed her face.
Then understanding.
She gently pointed toward her ear. Then shook her head.
Next, she touched her lips.
Another small shake.
Dean’s stomach dropped.
Oh.
She wasn’t ignoring him.
She couldn’t hear him.
Heat rushed to his face.
“Oh my God…” He whispered it mostly to himself.
She gave him a kind smile.
The kind that somehow made him feel even worse.
She signed one more sentence.
Dean had no idea what she’d said.
Not even one word.
Then she carefully placed the last notebook into her backpack.
Before leaving, she offered him one final smile.
Small. Warm.
Gone just as quickly as she disappeared into the crowd.
Dean stayed kneeling on the floor long after she’d left.
“…Dean?” Someone nudged his shoulder.
He looked up.
Garrett stood over him with Logan beside him, both carrying hockey bags.
Garrett raised an eyebrow.
“You planning on proposing to the floor?” Dean blinked.
“What?”
“You’ve been staring at the hallway for, like, two minutes.”
Logan glanced toward the direction the girl had gone.
“Who was she?” Dean slowly stood.
“I don’t know.” Garrett laughed.
“You don’t know who a girl is? That’s a first.” Dean barely heard him.
“She’s deaf.”
The teasing immediately disappeared from Garrett’s face.
“Oh.”
“I ran over her and when I apologized for it, she kept ignoring it. And I that she was just rude or something.” He explains to them. “Turns out that she just couldn’t hear me.”
Logan rubbed the back of his neck.
“That has to feel pretty crappy.”
“It does. Because she said something in sign language and I just stood here looking like an idiot.”
Dean looked down at the notebook she’d accidentally left behind.
A slim black journal. He picked it up.
There was no name on the cover.
Only a tiny silver moon in one corner.
“I need to give this back.” Garrett smirked.
“Sure.” Dean looked at him.
“What?”
“Nothing.” Garrett exchanged a knowing look with Logan.
“Just saying… I’ve never seen you volunteer to return a notebook before.” Dean rolled his eyes.
“I just feel bad.”
“Mhm.” Logan chuckled.
“We totally believe you.”
⸻
For the rest of the day… Dean couldn’t stop looking for her.
Every hallway.
Every lecture building.
Every coffee shop on campus.
Nothing.
By dinner, the notebook was still sitting on his desk.
He flipped through it exactly once.
Blank.
Every page. Not a single word.
Probably a new notebook.
He closed it immediately.
“I’m not a creep.” He wasn’t going to invade her privacy.
Still…
He wished he knew her name.
⸻
Three days later.
No sign of her.
Dean was beginning to wonder if she’d transferred.
Or if she’d somehow been a figment of his imagination.
“You’re distracted.” Dean looked up from his burger.
Across the dining hall table sat Garrett, Logan, Tucker and Beau.
“I’m eating.” Garrett snorted.
“You’ve been staring at the ketchup bottle for thirty seconds.” Dean glanced down.
“…Huh.” Beau narrowed his eyes.
“Okay what’s going on?”
“What?”
“This is getting weird.” Dean shrugged.
“I’m fine.”
“No.” Beau leaned forward.
“You never say you’re fine.” Logan nodded.
“He’s got a point.” Dean sighed dramatically.
“I bumped into this girl.” Garrett grinned.
“There it is.”
Dean ignored him.
“I thought she ignored me after I apologized.”
“And?”
“She’s deaf.” The table grew quieter.
Tucker was the first to speak.
“Ouch.” Dean rubbed the back of his neck.
“I felt like an asshole.”
“You didn’t know,” Tucker said.
“I know.” Dean sighed. “But she was signing something to me. And I just stood there and couldn’t even apologize properly.”
“She must had felt bad.” Beau said.
“It’s just frustrating, because we don’t know how excluded they feel until something like these happen.”
“What do you mean?” Logan asked.
“Do you think one of us would care to learn sign language? No, because we don’t know anyone that’s deaf, but we shouldn’t have to know someone to actually learn, so no one could feel what that girl felt.” He says frustrated and gathered his things and went out.
⸻
Later that night…
Dean sat alone in his room.
The notebook rested beside his laptop.
He stared at it.
Then at the search bar.
Then back at the notebook.
“This is ridiculous.” He typed anyway.
Beginner ASL lessons.
Hundreds of videos appeared.
He clicked the first one.
A smiling woman waved at the camera.
“Today we’re going to learn your first conversation in American Sign Language.”
Dean copied her.
Awkwardly.
His fingers refused to cooperate.
“How do people make this look so easy?”
He replayed the same thirty-second clip nearly twenty times.
Hello.
He practiced.
Again.
My name is…
Again.
By the time midnight rolled around, his fingers actually remembered the movements.
Not perfectly.
But enough.
He smiled to himself.
“Hello. My name is Dean.” The signs still felt clumsy.
But they were real.
A knock sounded at his door.
Dean barely looked up.
“It’s open.” The door swung inward.
Beau walked in carrying a bag of chips.
“So, I was thinking we could—” He stopped.
Dean froze. One hand still in the air.
Halfway through signing his own name.
Silence.
Beau slowly looked at the laptop.
The paused ASL lesson.
Then at Dean.
Then back to the screen.
A slow grin spread across his face.
“No…” Dean sighed.
“Don’t start.”
“Dude.”
“Beau.”
“Are you learning sign language?” Dean rubbed a hand over his face.
“…Maybe.” Beau burst into laughter.
Not mean laughter. The kind only a best friend could get away with.
“Oh, this is priceless.” Dean threw a pillow at him.
“Shut up.” Beau caught it easily.
“You are down bad.”
“I am not.”
“You’ve known this girl for approximately thirty seconds.” Dean pointed toward the laptop.
“I just…” He hesitated.
“I want to be able to apologize.” Beau’s smile softened.
For the first time since walking in, he stopped laughing.
“…That’s actually very nice of you.” Dean blinked.
“You think so?” Beau shrugged.
“I mean…” He tossed the pillow back. “You’re still completely screwed. But it’s nice that you’re trying.”
Dean smiled.
Beau nodded toward the laptop.
“I hope you find her again.”
Dean looked down at the notebook resting beside the keyboard.
“So do I.”
He had no idea that, somewhere else on campus, Y/N was wondering if she’d ever see the hockey player from the hallway again.
And sitting on her own desk…
Was a sticky note she’d written after the collision.
The cute guy with the green eyes still has my notebook.
The language between us 2
Pairing: Dean Di Laurentis x Deaf!reader
Summary: Dean never expected a simple accident in a crowded university hallway to stay on his mind for days. After an unexpected encounter with a girl he can’t stop thinking about, he’s left questioning how much he takes communication for granted. Determined to make things right, Dean embarks on a journey that might change far more than just one first impression.
Ps: Dialogue in BOLD and ITALICS indicates that the characters are communicating in sign language.
Dialogue in BOLD only indicates that they are writing in the notebook.
Dean walked out of the kitchen to the living room carrying a protein shake, looking far too cheerful for eight in the morning.
Garrett noticed immediately.
“He’s smiling.” Logan looked up from the couch.
“That’s concerning.” Tucker glanced over, then frowned.
“Why does he look like a puppy?” Dean stopped.
“What’s wrong with you guys?” Garrett crossed his arms dramatically.
“You look to happy for someone that’s preparing to hit the gym.”
Dean rolled his eyes, drinking his shake.
“I can’t just wake up in a good mood?”
“If you fucked someone last night, sure.” Garrett says. “But if you slept alone then no, it’s weird you’re in a good mood.”
“That’s suspicious,” Logan agreed.
Dean let out an exaggerated sigh.
“You guys are seeing things.”
Before anyone could keep interrogating him, Beau walked into the room.
The second he looked at Dean, a slow grin spread across his face.
“Morning guys.” He says and the guys answered but belt looking at Dean. “What are we looking at?”
“Dean woke up excited today.”
“Oh, did he?” Dean immediately pointed at him.
“Don’t start.”
“I know exactly why he’s smiling.” Garrett looked between them.
“What does he know that we don’t?” Beau took a sip of his coffee, enjoying the suspense far too much.
“Our friend here has been watching sign language lessons every single night.”
Silence.
Logan blinked once.
“…Seriously?” Dean rubbed the back of his neck.
“I just…” He shrugged awkwardly. “I wanted to apologize properly.”
For a second, nobody teased him.
Tucker smiled first.
“That’s actually kind of sweet.” Dean groaned.
“Please don’t make this weird.” Garrett laughed.
“Dean Di Laurentis voluntarily studying?”
Logan nodded solemnly.
“I’ve seen miracles before, but this might be the biggest one.”
Dean grabbed one of the pillows from the couch and threw it at Garrett.
“Shut up. And for your information I might not study a lot but my grades are higher Thant all of yours.”
“That’s actually true.” Beaus says laughing.
Even Dean couldn’t hide the small smile that stayed on his face.
⸻
Two days later Dean had almost convinced himself he’d never see her again.
Briar was huge.
Thousands of students crossed campus every day.
The odds of running into one specific person twice felt ridiculously small.
Still… He carried the black notebook everywhere.
Every class.
Every practice.
Every walk across campus.
Just in case he saw her again and had the opportunity to return it.
But he knew that he just wanted to make sure that he could talk to her.
That afternoon, Logan asked him to go to the library to find a history book he’d been needing for one of his classes.
He wandered between shelves for several minutes, reading the labels until he found the correct aisle.
As he turned the corner…
He stopped.
She was there.
Sitting alone beside one of the tall windows, surrounded by books and handwritten notes.
Soft afternoon sunlight streamed through the glass, catching the edges of her hair.
Everything around her seemed strangely quiet.
For a second, Dean simply stood there.
His heartbeat picked up.
“There you are…” He hadn’t realized he’d whispered the words until they were already out.
Before he could overthink it, he walked toward her.
She sensed someone approaching and looked up.
Recognition appeared almost immediately.
Then came the smile.
Warm. Gentle.
The same smile he’d been thinking about for two days.
Dean smiled back without even noticing.
He carefully placed the black notebook on the table between them.
Her eyes widened.
She looked down at the familiar silver moon on the cover before lifting her gaze back to him.
Dean swallowed.
Then, a little nervously, he raised his hands.
“Hello.” The movement wasn’t perfect.
He knew it wasn’t. His fingers hesitated for half a second before continuing.
“My name… Dean.” He took one slow breath. “Sorry.”
He said and pointed to her notebook.
When he finished, he felt strangely exposed.
Like he’d just taken an exam without knowing if he’d passed.
She stared at him for a long moment.
Not because he’d done it wrong.
Because she’d clearly never expected it.
A soft laugh escaped her.
Not one of amusement. One of genuine surprise.
Her eyes brightened before she instinctively answered in sign language.
The moment she finished, she paused.
Realizing he couldn’t understand most of it yet.
Dean laughed quietly.
“I still have a lot to learn.”
She smiled and she pulled the small notebook he returned it and a pen.
She wrote carefully before sliding it toward him.
You’re learning sign language?
Dean nodded. He picked up the pen.
For a second, he hesitated.
There were dozens of things he could write.
I wanted to apologize.
I felt bad.
I didn’t mean to scare you.
Instead…
He wrote the simplest truth.
For you.
She read the sentence once.
Then again.
When she looked back at him, something in her expression had softened.
She looked down and wrote another question.
Why?
He instantly replied.
Because I couldn’t bare the fact that I couldn’t apologize properly to you for the accident.
She smiled.
Would you like some help learning?
Dean smiled before he even realized he was doing it.
I’d really like that.
She smiled too.
Then, slowly, she pointed at herself before signing her name.
Dean watched carefully. Completely focused.
Trying to memorize every movement.
She noticed.
A quiet laugh escaped her before she repeated it, this time a little slower.
Dean copied the signs as best he could.
She gave him an approving nod.
His first lesson had officially started.
Neither of them noticed Beau walking past the library windows outside.
He stopped mid-step.
His eyes widened.
Dean and the girl.
The black notebook with the silver moon.
Dean… smiling like an idiot.
Beau slowly lowered the coffee he’d been holding.
“…No way.”
Without taking his eyes off the scene inside, he pulled out his phone, took a photo and send it to a group chat he created just with the other boys about him.
Dean and his lover girl.
Group chat
Beau: Emergency meeting tonight.
Dean found the notebook girl.
Garrett: NO WAY.
Logan: ABOUT TIME.
Tucker: I give him two weeks before he’s completely gone.
Beau looked through the window one last time.
Dean was still sitting across from her, completely invested in learning another sign.
Beau smirked.
“Oh, he’s already gone.”
Tag list: @purplerainx1 @dearmy-diary @sunflower1290 @libbyqypu @idohknow @tubby23 @plants-w0rld @smilezzz-artzs @sad-but-sarcastic @spooky-librarian-ghost @bl4ckstarss @brianna28483 @tappyj @i-know-freaking-judo @coldheartedmar @kataleya21200103 @itmekelpy @myhipsterparadise-blog1 @kmc1989 @thecraziestcrayon @fiendforwriting
The team earlier today!!

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is it casual now? pt. 1
paige bueckers x ditzy bi curious reader
2nd person but mostly paige’s pov
wc: 3.9k
warnings: sad, making paige sad, paige is helplessly yearning, reader is kind of a bitch sorry, so much weed usage! making out, no use of y/n, paige calls reader honey, baby, and sugar
plot: you’re gay and deeply in denial and using paige to figure shit out (mean!) and paige is so pussy whipped she just lets you😔 happy ending tho i promise, reader is very girly.
a/n: i’ve never been to uconn, i don’t know what their greek life is like, but in this they have frat parties every week alright? reader has big boobs, if you don’t, neither do i, just pretend. ik i talk about part 2’s a lot of the time but this like really is a series i swear.
Paige’s injury was weighing on her. She hated being out, she hated feeling useless. Any time her team lost she blamed herself, if she’d just taken better care of her body, she could’ve been out there putting in game winning shots. She hated being left out, she hated the pain in her knee.
And my god, she hated how bored she was. She didn’t realize how much of her life was spent on basketball till she couldn’t do anything anymore.
I mean sure she had PT 4 times a week but so much of her life was basketball. No more early morning runs, hours of her day that had once been spent practicing, shooting 3’s, playing scrimmages, or hitting the weight room? Now those hours were spent bumming around her apartment feeling bad for herself.
She started hanging out around you more and more during her recovery. She’d known you for a few years now, one of Amari’s friends. She always thought you were cute but she told herself she didn’t like you. You always had a boyfriend anyways. They never lasted long, but you always had one.
She didn’t like straight girls, she wasn’t a chaser. Liking a straight girl meant endless pinning that wouldn’t get her anywhere.
So no, she didn’t like you– not romantically at least. But she did like getting high in your apartment.
She lays on your bed, staring at the ceiling. The edible has fully kicked in and it’s strong. She knew your boyfriend was over, and it pissed her off (just because he’s a bad boyfriend and nothing else at all) so she went out and got the pack of gummies, sending you a photo of the bag with a ‘?’. She knew you’d kick him out.
But Goddamnit standing in the doorway of your apartment? Apparently because you were hanging out with him, you were dressed for him. She hates when you wear tops to low cut because she can’t take her eyes off your chest. She feels bad but she knows you’re too oblivious to even notice. But the way your tits are straining against that fabric? Begging to spill out on display for her? She’s a mess.
But she ate a gummy and so did you. She knew weed probably wasn’t good for her recovery, but it was the easiest way to be around you. If she reached out to you just asking to hang out, it’s unlikely you’d agree without questions or suspicion.
So here she is, laying in your bed, high as fuck.
You’re sitting on your floor looking out of the window. “I think I’m gonna break up with Ayden.” You sigh softly.
This peaks Paige’s interests, making her sit up. “Yeah? Why?”
“I don’t know.” You shrug. “I’m just kinda done. He’s annoying.”
“How so?” She asks, eager to pry.
You turn around and lean on the wall, looking up at her on your bed. “He’s bad at sex, he’s jealous, but he talks to other girls. So… I’m done.”
Paige feels guilty, she hates how exciting this is to her. Granted she gets excited every time you break up with a guy, which makes it twice as painful when you inevitably get with another boy. But this never seems to stop her from getting excited again, a cycle.
“He sounds like an ass. Glad you’re leaving him.” She nods.
You look up at her, those blue eyes glossed over, eyelids heavy. She really is beautiful. “Is it easier being a lesbian? Women seem… like better people.”
She’s surprised. You’ve never really asked her about her sexuality. She thinks for a moment, “Nah girls can be bitches too but… you talk about bad sex a lot and I feel like guys aren’t good in bed. At least with women like… the sex is almost mever bad.” She shrugs, trying to be honest.
Really though, she thinks being a lesbian is terrible, because it comes will falling head over heels for a girl who talks about nothing but boys.
You hum, nodding, “I don’t know like… I like ridding though.”
Paige laughs, you’ve always been overly blunt when you’re high. Today is no exception.
“That’s what straps are for.” She laughs.
Again your reaction manages to surprise her.
“I’ve never understood the appeal. Why not just get with a guy?”
“Cause… women are better. And guys don’t have tits and… women are hotter.” She shrugs. She’s never thought much of it.
“Have you ever used a strap?” You look up at her. Such innocent curiosity in those eyes, what she would give to show you just how great a strap can be. She can just imagine your tits bouncing in that white tube top while you fall apart on the navy blue strap she has in her bottom drawer. Or maybe she’d buy one just for you. A pink one. She’s sure you’d like that.
“Yeah.” She nods. “I’m usually the one wearing it though.”
“So you’re a top?” You ask.
Jeez, how do you even know this shit? Paige nods anyways though. “Yeah it’s fun.” She shrugs.
“Why?” You continue.
What? “Why what?”
“Like… why is it fun, what do you like about it?”
Oh. Shit how does she even explain this to you? “I don’t know it’s like… control or something. And a strap feels good to, you know like… rubs my pussy as well. But… I don’t know it’s just fun to watch a girl fall apart cause I’m fucking her.” She wants to watch you fall apart while she fucks you.
She’s sure she’d be uncomfortable sober, but right now she doesn’t have much going on in her train of thoughts, let alone enough to trigger any form of shame or humility.
“Cool.” You nod. “Why don’t you date anyone though?”
Paige furrows her brows, “Fuck you mean? I just got with a girl last friday.” She scoffs.
You groan and roll your eyes, “Yeah, I know you sleep with people. I mean dating. Why don’t you date anyone.”
“Sure I do.” Paige shrugs.
“Okay, who was the lest girl you actually dated?”
She sighs, thinking back. It admittedly has been seven months, and even that wasn’t a very serious relationship. “Okay whatever. Shut up.”
You just chuckle, shaking your head. You stand up and walk over to the bed, sitting down next to Paige. “So. Who do you like?”
Paige looks up at you with curiosity. “Pardon?”
“Who’s your crush?” You persist.
You. “Don’t have one.” She shrugs.
You huff and cross your arms, “Broringgggg! Come on, there must be someone.”
“There really isn’t,” She shrugs again, “sorry to disappoint.”
You groan, overly dramatic, “You’re such a loser Paige…!”
“Woah woah woah!” She laughs, “not too much on me, I like being single.”
The only other times Paige saw you were frat parties. This made her love frat parties. She didn’t actually care for them very much, she was indifferent, but it was an excuse to see you. She told herself she really did like frat parties, even if it wasn’t true.
So here she is on a Friday night with Aubrey and Ice, with a white polo, jorts, and a slight limp.
She’s immediately hit with the smell of weed as she walks through the door. Figures. The music was loud and the space was already crowded.
She headed to the kitchen and opened the cooler, grabbing the first beer she saw.
Okay maybe she did like frat parties, but she wouldn’t go as often as she didn’t if you didn’t go to so many.
It’s not like you went every week, but usually every other. You said it was good enough for you. You’re still getting out twice a month, but no one can say you party every weekend.
She pretended to care about the other people she said hi to, but she didn’t. She was looking for you.
When her eyes found you she froze. You had on a black tank top, a tight one, letting her see your cleavage. Okay letting anyone see your cleavage, but she liked to wish deep down it was for her. And this little sparkly sequin cheetah print skirt, she’d seen you wear once before at the start of the year.
You looked amazing. When did you not?
She made her way over to you, trying to seem as chill as possible, like you both just happened to be at the same party, like she wasn’t here for you.
“Hey,” She smiled.
You’d been talking to someone Paige vaguely recognized, a girl in your sorority. You look up and stop your conversation, standing up and giving me a hug. “Hi Paige!” You smile excitedly.
She feels butterflies at the thought of how happy you always were to see her. I mean sure, you were extremely social and acted like that when you saw most people, but Paige still felt special.
She notices as you look down at the beer in her hand and grimace, “that shit is so nasty, why do you drink it?”
“Better than being a girl-drink-drunk,” she teases, referring to the Blue Raspberry Beatbox in your hand. She’s tried them before, so much fruit juice and sugar you can’t even taste the alcohol.
“Whatever, have fun tasting gross,” you shrug rolling your eyes.
Tasting gross? Did you think she was gonna kiss someone? Paige ignores that.
“You havin’ fun?”
“Yeah!” You nod, you quickly motion for your friend you’d been talking to stand up. “This is Celia!” You smile.
Paige smiles and extends her hand, “Paige.” She smiles politely.
“I know!” The girl smiles shaking Paige’s hand.
Did you talk about her to Celia? But her question is answered before she can think much longer about it.
“I’ve been to some of your games,” Celia smiles.
Figures, she doesn’t like to be cocky but she knows the majority of campus knows who she is. She just likes to be optimistic that people won’t know who she is.
“Cool,” she nods. “We won I’m sure?”
“Yeah!” Celia nods, “It was uh… DePaul the last one I saw you at.”
“Nice.” Paige remembers the last time she played DePaul. Last season before she got this fucking tear.
“I’m gonna go find my boyfriend!” Celia announces, more to you than Paige she assumes. Sure enough you give her a hug and promise to find her later.
“She seems cool.” Paige smiles down at you.
“I don’t really know her that well,” you shrug in response. “Just some mutual friends.”
“I get that,” she nods, feeling awkward, worried you’ll go talk to someone else. “So did you dump Ayden yet?”
“Don’t say dump!” You scoff, “I politely ended things!” You clarify, “but yeah.”
Paige nods, secretly happy, “Nice. You happy?”
You nod, “yeah I guess it’s good he’s gone.”
“What now?” She continues.
“I mean… I should probably try out being single but… I don’t really want to.” You shrug.
“What’s the longest you’ve been single?” She asks.
“Well… I was single the whole summer between Freshman and Sophomore year, so probly like 4 months?”
Paige feels like she should be surprised, but in the year or so she’s known you, you’ve been with 5 different guys. If she was an asshole she might even consider you a slut, but that thought hadn’t really crossed her mind.
“l guess I’m kind of a whore, huh?” You continue.
“What? No of course not!” Paige says quickly, not wanting you to think so low of yourself. “It’s totally normal to date a lot in college, that’s the whole point of your 20’s.”
You pause and smile up at her. “Thanks Paige.” You seem to genuinely appreciate her defending you.
“This party kinda sucks,” you sigh, looking around. “Wanna dip?”
Paige didn’t care what they did, the thought of doing something with you was enough to have her nodding in seconds. “Totally.” She agrees.
After finding Ice to give her a quick a goodbye, and being told Aubrey was “busy” with a girl and wouldn’t wanna be interrupted, Paige headed out to her car where you were waiting.
“Are you sure you can drive?” You fuss again.
“Honey I’ve had half a beer all night, I can drive.” She assured you.
“Alright,” You sighed, getting into her passenger seat.
A few minutes into the drive to Paige apartment, you spoke again, “Do you have more edibles at your place?”
“Yeah I got a pack.” She nods.
“Can we get high?” you ask.
“Course,” she nods, eyes on the road. Paige didn’t actually get high very often. I mean, she’d done it several times throughout her first two years of college, but it wasn’t something she could do often. After all she’s an athlete, she needed her body to be at the top of its game all the time, and weed wasn’t exactly healthy. But she liked getting high with you, she’d never say no to that.
You slip off your black kitten heels in the doorway of her apartment. Ice wouldn’t be home till much later, so Paige wasn’t worried about interruptions. She headed into her room, rummaging through her drawer of t-shirts to find the bag of gummies at the bottom.
She took one out and chewed it, it tasted slightly like raspberry and mostly like weed. Gross. Whatever. She handed you the pack, watching you chew a gummy as well.
“You want something?” She asks, looking at you in her doorway.
“Like what?” Your brows furrowed.
“Food? Water?”
“Oh!” You giggled. “Yeah! Do you still have those sprite cans?”
“Sure do mamas,” she smiled, heading into the kitchen and opening the fridge, handing you a can. She knows better than to throw it at you, remembering cleaning up sprite all over her floor after making that mistake before. You did not catch the can, instead it hit her counter and exploded.
She watches as you carefully crack open the soda can, cautious of your shiny baby pink nails.
You bring the can to your lips and take a sip, rubbing off some of that sparkly brown lip gloss.
You head into Paige’s bedroom and sit down on her bed. You don’t ask, or even look to see if Paige is following. Maybe you know how much you have her around her finger, like you know she’d always say yes to you and always follow. Or maybe you were oblivious. She wasn’t sure, but she was sure to follow you into her room and sit down across from you, leaning on her headboard.
“You gonna spill that sprite on my bed?” She smirks.
“Nuh-uh!” You shake your head. “Pink sweat!” You insist, holding out your right pinky to lock with hers.
“Alright…” She chuckles, squeezing your pinky with hers.
“So do you have a crush yet?” You ask her.
“What?” Paige looks up.
“Last time we got high, you said you had no crushes. Have you gotten one yet?”
Gotten one? Paige laughs. “Sorry sugar, no dice.”
You pout. Paige laughs again. Maybe the weed is getting to her brain faster than usual because something in her just snaps the way you look at her all soft and pouting. It’s like her train of thought is just silent.
“Alright maybe I do.” She admits.
Your face lights up. She loves how happy you look. All that cause she has a crush? Paige just wants to make you happy after all.
“Who? Who? who?” you squeal happily, tapping Paige’s leg repeatedly.
“You.” She smiles softly.
You furrow your brows and laugh a little, seemingly ignoring her answer and persisting. “Come on! Tell me! Pleaseeeee! I’m such a good secret keeper!” You insist.
“I did tell you!” Paige replies.
“When?” You furrow your brows. God you were so oblivious…
“Just now, it’s you.” She continues. Goddamit she wishes anything would come into her head and stop her, but somehow just seeing how sweet you looked wanting to know her crush? She couldn’t lie to you.
“Ha ha, very funny Paige.” You roll your eyes. “Just tell me!”
She leans forward, to look at you closer, “You don’t believe me?” She says softly.
Your face shifts, more confused now. “Paige…” Disbelief on your face. “Me?”
“Yeah, you.” She nods. Jesus where did her shame go!?
“Why?” You furrow your brows. “Paige you know I’m straight. You’re being silly.”
“Yeah I know you’re straight and I hate it, how ‘bout that?”
“What?” Your voice drops. You look hurt. Upset. Oh no! How did she upset you.
Paige gets nervous, “Shit baby, what’s wrong?”
“No! You can’t call me baby now! You like me? Like… like like me?” You still look so hurt.
“Yeah… so?”
“Well… now I feel terrible Paige! What am I supposed to do?” You huff, throwing your hands up and smacking the bed.
“What do you mean?” She’s confused. You’re upset? Even though she’s the one who’s had to pine after you with no hope in sight.
“I just…” You sigh, clearly struggling to find words, “I love you so much and… I’m sad that you’re sad and… it’s my fault, but I can’t fix it…”
Paige worries, you look like you’re on the verge of tears. The weed is definitely kicking in. “Wait-” She gulps, feeling bad that you feel bad. You really just are too sweet for your own good. “Please don’t feel bad, it’s not your fault you don’t feel the same.” she assures you.
You sigh again, very pouty tonight and just stare at Paige.
Then you do something Paige would’ve never seen coming. She’s too high to process you leaning in, or to understand what she’s feeling as your lips hit hers. She let it happen because she’s so out of it and so slow to register what’s happening.
But soon enough she pulls back, grabbing your arms to pull you off of her, “What the fuck are you doing?” she doesn’t sound angry, just deeply confused.
Your face softens into something guilty and pitiful, “I’m trying to help you feel better…” You sit back, looking like a kicked puppy.
“What?” Paige is still deeply confused and shocked.
“I just thought… you know… if you liked me you’d wanna kiss me and… this way you get to.” You shrug meekly.
Jesus you were sickeningly sweet. You were kissing her to try and give her some of yourself, because she knew she’d never have you. But despite your good intentions, this only makes things worse for her. Now she’s gotten to feel your lips, knowing she’ll never get to again. She already knew she’d couldn’t have you, but now she knows she can’t have you or those pretty lips. The lips she once loved to stare at when you were distracted, the lips she’s certain will permanently be burned into her.
“No, no… that’s not- you shouldn’t-” Paige sighs, unsure of what to say.
“How can I make you feel better?” You look up at her through those soft beaty lashes. Wide doe eyes, slightly red and heavy from the weed, but still desperate to help others.
“I don’t know,” she sigh, shaking her head and rubbing her temple.
Paige is convinced you’d like to kill her. I mean you must right? Because then and there, before her own eyes, you lean forward and crawl over to her. Paige’s mouth goes dry.
She’s hallucinating. This is some dirty, perverted hallucination. Surely her drink and the party was laced, and she’s gonna wake up in the basement of a frat house right?
Or no, maybe this is God punishing her. For what she’s not sure, but you must be a demon sent to torture her, looking so desperate to please, your tits hanging on for dear life in that tank top just inches away from her.
“Please Paige…” You plead, sitting back on your calves, jusy inches from her, “tell me how to do to make this all better.”
Maybe this is a test. God gives his toughest battles to his toughest soldiers. But apparently God was wrong this time, because Paige simply isn’t strong enough. All she can do is pull you into a kiss, her fingers gripping the hair on the back of your head, surely messing it up. She doesn’t care.
Her mouth opens and she groans. You taste like weed and vodka and gummies and heaven. Yes Paige is certain her theory about a hallucination is correct. But she hopes she never wakes up, and she can spend the rest of her life in this dream like trace where you of all people are sliding their tongue into her mouth. You are kissing her back. Life is unreal.
She’s sitting in her bed, and you’re on your knees in front of her, kissing her back. She pulls away to gasp for breath, but only for a second or so, leaning back in, one hand on your jaw, the other still holding the back of your hair.
She feels like she might explode as she feels your finger tips on her bicep, your nails lightly grazing her skin as your palm wraps around her arm. She’s suddenly thinking about how she skipped weights yesterday. Stupid. She’ll never skip a weight day again after feeling your hand on her muscle.
She practically whimpers into your mouth as your other hand finds her waist. The kiss that keeps on giving she figures.
All good things must come to an end though. That’s never been so evident as when you pull away and not just to gasp for breath, but sit back.
“Somthn’ wrong?” She asks, sitting up a little, completely breathless and dazed.
“I’m tired Paige,” you pout. God that fucking pout… “can we go to sleep?”
“Uh- yeah sure, whatever you want.” And she means it. Paige quite literally would do whatever you wanted, she’s sure of that.
So despite wanting to touch new places on you, see how deep she can get her tongue into your mouth maybe? She’ll lay down and go to sleep because that’s what you want.
You don’t bother changing out of your sequin skirt or washing off your make up, you just lift up her covers and lay down like it’s your own bed. In some ways it kind of is, in the sense that she’d let anything you want be yours.
She carefully slides out of the bed and pads into her bathroom, she brushes her teeth and changes into some better sleep clothes. She’s cautious getting back into bed, worried you might’ve fallen asleep already. She quickly proven wrong and you roll over right away, snugging into her side, one leg draped over hers and your head on her chest.
She freezes, breath hitching. She’s not sure what’s wrong with her. Plenty of girls had gotten clingy and laid on her chest, this wasn’t new to her. So why did you affect her so much?
She watches as you come up and place a soft lazy kiss on her bottom lip, “goodnight Paige…” you murmur softly as you cuddle up on her chest.
You were so soft with her. Why? “Goodnight” she replied softly, your name barely leaving her lips, her voice so hushed. She’d be surprised if she woke up from anything other than a heart attack.
i will be using this from now on

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